


Opia

by NeoDayBreak



Category: GOT7, 방탄소년단 | Bangtan Boys | BTS
Genre: Angst and Feels, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood and Violence, Fluff, M/M, Past Violence, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2021-03-02
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:02:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 41
Words: 133,115
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24759001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NeoDayBreak/pseuds/NeoDayBreak
Summary: He was at his wits end with them. For months the group had been shamelessly attacking both his men and his enemies, seemingly for no reason at all. After many sleepless nights and a high body count, Jeongguk finally managed to make an agreement with the so-called rogue group named the Rose.He would provide them with protection so long as they pledge their allegiance to him.But taking on the group would turn out to be more than he bargained for.Especially the young, blonde Joker of the group, also known as Kim Taehyung.TaeGguk Mafia AUTop!GgukBottom! Tae
Relationships: Jeon Jungkook/Kim Taehyung | V, Jung Hoseok | J-Hope/Min Yoongi | Suga/Park Jimin, Kim Namjoon | RM/Kim Seokjin | Jin
Comments: 40
Kudos: 208





	1. 00

_ “It’s never satisfied. It’s pulling strings of life tonight. So many tears it’s cried. I wonder what it’s thinking.” _

Skillful hands thread pure white string through a brand new sewing needle, the two ends meeting together in a tight knot.

_ “Its painted face is all I see, they’re always haunting me. It’s pulling strings of life tonight, it sleeps. Please buy us time, oh please rewind, a tainted rhyme.” _

Needle pierces flesh and pulls upwards, stitching a permanent smile onto the face. A deep red color stains the room, giving all those who walk in an uncomfortable shiver down their backs. Despite the red lights, bright green eyes are focused solely on the body beneath them.

_ “A story ever vile. Such wicked thoughts behind a smile. They wander all the while. I wonder what they’re thinking…” _

The quiet  _ snip _ of scissors interrupts the song playing in the background as the thread is cut and the smile is complete. Plump lips fall into a frown as the puppeteer criticizes his work, not liking how lifeless his marionette looks. The boy shrugs, however, still congratulating himself on his work as his doll looks amazing despite the lack of emotion. But it’s only his second try and besides…

His puppet is already dead.

He tried to make one while the man was still alive, but he screamed too much and destroyed the calming atmosphere of the workshop.

So he killed him.

He gave up on making living marionettes after that. He couldn’t even complete one. So making his dolls out of the dead will have to do. He still has one body left, and this one will be  _ perfect _ . It has to be, it will be the centerpiece of his exhibit. He didn’t even carve his signature rose into the cadaver’s abdomen yet. He wanted the insignia to go last - the cherry on the top.

_ “Silence breaks the cage tonight, It then becomes awake… A purple plague of rage, it stains the night until the day. It’s never satisfied. It’s bringing gifts of vengeful life. So many tears it’s cried. I wonder what it’s thinking…” _

The boy slides off of the body on top of the operating table, bare feet making contact with cold, marble tiles. He gathers his equipment and places it to the side, setting it out of the way as he switches his completed marionette for another dead body, it’s body basking beneath the red lights. After setting all of his tools back up on the table beside the corpse, the young puppeteer climbs on top of the table, sitting comfortably on the body as he gets to work.

The eyes were first. He removes the annoyingly dull orbs, tossing them in the trash can before replacing them. He chose buttons instead, sewing them into the sockets with a bit of difficulty. The buttons were quite lovely, at least in his eyes. They were all black, sleek and shiny, with blood red roses imprinted in the center. He made sure to take a damp cotton swab and clean off the blood that began to slowly stain the pretty buttons.

Next was the smile - it was his favorite part. This time he chose red thread to put the emotion in place. He carefully lets the needle penetrate the icy pale skin, pulling upwards some before making another puncture. He repeats the process over and over, sometimes going either higher or lower to create the smile. After it’s completed, he snips the excess thread and pauses, scrutinizing his work. A small smile graces his soft lips as he notices the doll looks a bit more lively than his previous two.

_ “Its painted face is all I see. They’re always haunting me. It’s pulling strings of life tonight, it weeps a selfish crime. Oh please rewind, we’re out of time.” _

He picks the needle back up, threading through a new strand of string before tying the ends. He starts to stitch a design into the side of the marionette’s face, starting at the middle of its jaw before going up to its temple. It takes some time, but soon the image of several roses are sewn into the skin. Green thread replaces the red and pretty leaves now accompany the red petals. The boy places his needle down before picking up a knife.

It was a beautiful blade, one of the boy’s favorites. It was completely silver and long and thin with a beautifully carved hilt, and despite how many times he’s used it, it was still as sleek and as sharp as when he first received it. He slides down the body and unbuttons the white dress shirt his doll wears. Sunkissed skin contrasts with deathly pale as the boy places one hand on the bare waist, stabilising himself as he carves into the skin.

The boy took extra care in creating his rose, even if he’s replicated it dozens of times before. But this time it was a little different. This time he carved a skeletal hand holding the stem of the rose, giving off a deadly beautiful taint to his man made marionette. Just as he finishes off the insignia, a door clicks open, and white light invades the red. Green eyes lift from the newest edition to the boy’s rather small marionette collection and turn to the person who dared to disturb his work. His slight glare, however, disappears as soon as he sees who just opened the door.

“Chim chim…” He says happily yet quietly, his deep voice filling the now silence. “Look. I finished my marionettes.”

The man in the doorway looks from the green eyed boy to the body he sits on, a look of disgust plaguing his face.

“That’s disturbing, Taehyung.” He says, unable to look away despite how much he wants to.

The boy frowns slightly, a pout placed on his pretty pink lips.

“That’s not what you’re supposed to say, Jiminie. Don’t you know how hard I worked on them? The other two aren’t that good, but this one is quite lovely.” Taehyung says.

“Sure. Are you ready to go? We have to set everything up before two.” The other boy says, completely dismissing his friend.

“Yes, I am. I just finished. I’ll just need to bring some twine and bigger needles to hang them up. Have you got the letter and the boxes?”

“Of course I do. Now hurry up and get your.......puppets......ready.”

The boy frowns, sliding off of the table.

“They’re marionettes, not puppets.” He says matter-of-factly.

“Okay, do you need help? Hoseok and Yoongi should be here soon.” Jimin responds, changing the topic yet again.

“Yes please, I need help moving them to the car.”

And as the two began to work, the green-eyed boy by the name of Taehyung only had one thought in his mind.  _ I hope he likes my marionettes. _

  
  


\---

  
  


It was nearing dawn when he found them along with a few other members of his team, and when he did, his body emptied the contents of his stomach. They were tied up in an abandoned office near the edge of town, strings attaching their limbs to the ceiling like puppets. He knew that their happy facade and button eyes would haunt him in his sleep. His skin turned a sickly pale color when he realized just who the men were. With disgust, confusion and a dash of fear bubbling in his still nauseous stomach, he pulls out his phone and dials a certain number.

“Yugyeom, did you find them?” The man on the other line asks, a mix of desperation and frustration in his tone.

“No, they were gone before we got here. But......they left us another ‘gift’.” Yugyeom can’t help but stare at the sewn on smiles and eyes as he says the word “gift”, a cold shiver running down his spine.

The man on the phone sighs. “What is it this time?”

“I think it’s better if you come see it for yourself. This......there’s no way in hell I can explain this.”

Another sigh reaches Yugyeom’s ear.

“Be there in ten.”

With that, the line goes dead and Yugyeom puts his phone back into his pocket. He steps closer to the latest victims of the rogue group.

The worst part about this group isn’t that they kill members of the mafia he’s a part of, but that they don’t know whether they’re allies or enemies as they kill members from their rival groups as well.

He studies the bodies for a while, biting back the bile that threatens to climb up his throat. He notices that only the center body has the insignia of the rogues carved into his chest, but alongside it he has roses sewn into his face. However, all of them hold something in their hands. Yugyeom frowns, looking closer at the objects they hold. The two on either side of the “centerpiece” hold black boxes with gold ribbons tying it close, a parchment tag hanging off of one of the ribbon loops. He can faintly see the red, cursive writing on the tags.

The body in the middle, on the other hand, has his left hand tied up, making it seem as though he’s holding out his hand himself. In his hand he holds an envelope, the same blood red ink on the top writing out a single name: Jeon Jeongguk.

A few minutes later and a slick black car pulls up to the deserted building, tires crunching beneath the gravel. The headlights shut off as the engine falls asleep and the driver’s door opens. A tall man steps out of the vehicle, his brooding figure hidden in the shadows of the night. Fierce, onyx eyes pierce through the dark as the man walks inside the building with quick, unhesitant steps, wanting to get this over with. However his steps soon slow down once he catches sight of the scene before him.

Three of his biggest enemies, dead and turned into marionette dolls, hanging lifelessly by red ropes.

He can feel his stomach churn, and all he can think about is which psychopath from that damned group did this. He’s not angry at them for killing them, maybe for slipping away from him yet again, but not for who they decided to kill this time around. He’s more curious about  _ who _ the hell did something as morbid as this.

“Sir.” Yugyeom says, walking up to his boss, holding the letter and two boxes he saw the puppets carrying. “One of them was holding a letter. It’s addressed to you, sir.”

He hands his boss the letter, taking a step back as he reads it. The man’s galaxial orbs take in the fancy cursive writing, the red ink contrasting nicely with the white paper. As he reads, he can’t help but frown slightly.

“They want to meet.” He states simply before grabbing the boxes.

He takes a look inside, finding several vintage rose rings, maybe five or six in total.

“And these are our tickets in.” He continues, taking one out and studying it.

“Do you think it’s a trap?” Yugyeom asks.

“Only one way to find out. Get Eunae, Jackson, Bambam and Mark and let them know about the meeting. They’ll be accompanying us.”

“Yes sir.”

The man finds the ring that fits him, wondering just how they figured out his ring size as he puts it on his right ring finger. He hands the rest of the boxes to Yugyeom before turning and heading back to his car. Sitting in the dark, he takes another look at the letter, reading his name in red lettering. After a moment, he sets the letter on the seat beside him and starts his car up, heading back home.


	2. 01

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeongguk and his team finally meet the Rose

Jeongguk

The evening sun had already begun to set when the others and I began to get ready. I had some of my men check out the meeting spot beforehand and came to find a small yet famous restaurant. I also have some members set up around the building, waiting for a signal in case things go awry. I put on an all black suit - silk black button up, silk black tie, silk black vest, silk black suit jacket, black pants, black shoes. I can practically hear my sister calling me an emo as I grab my hand gun and leave the room.

“Fuckin’ emo ass bitch.” My younger sister, Eunae, says as I meet her in the foyer.

“How did I know you would say that?” I rhetorically ask.

Eunae looks like my polar opposite, wearing an all white dress with a gold belt around her waist and white heels, a matching clutch in her hands.

“Do you think there will be any cute boys there?” Eunae questions, completely changing the topic as she twirls her obsidian hair around her pale fingers.

“How should I know?”

She shrugs. “You know a lot. Anyways, Yugyeom, Bambam and Mark are in the car. We’re waiting for Jackson now.”

“Of course we are.”

We wait for the last member to come, the latter apologizing profusely as we make our way to the car awaiting us.

“Remember everyone, this is supposed to be a peaceful negotiation. Don’t kill or harm anyone unless I say so, got it?” I say as the car starts moving.

“Yes sir.” Everyone says simultaneously.

The car ride was mostly silent, most of us probably mentally preparing ourselves for the night to come. None of us know much about this rogue gang, we only have a name - the Rose. It was what we assume they preferred to be called, seeing as at every scene they leave behind some sort of depiction of the red flower. They go after members of different gangs seemingly at random and for no reason at all. They’re an overall pain in the ass, but one has to admit that they’re pretty damn powerful and know how to leave their mark.

For one is their insignia and where they choose and how to place it. They’re the only group I know that leaves a mark behind. They don’t leave behind any kind of evidence and never get caught. No one has ever seen a member of the group and lived. Then there’s just the pure creativity of their work. Admittedly, they do some hella morbid shit, but it’s something I never would have come up with, nor would I have gone through with it. I just don’t have the taste for something as grotesque as making human marionettes. As dangerous as they are, if this peace meeting goes well, I might even gain some new allies.

“We’re here, Gguk, let’s go inside.” Eunae tells me.

I follow her and the others out of the car, the crisp night air nipping at my skin. I lead the way up to the rather sophisticated restaurant, red carpet contrasting with my black shoes. The door opens from within, a stout man wearing a tailored suit holding it open for us, greeting us with a “Hello, welcome to Kaleidoscope.”

I simply give him a nod of acknowledgement, walking up to the counter. A tall man with peach colored hair stands behind the desk, beaming a heart shaped smile so large that his eyes disappear. He has on a long sleeve black shirt beneath a white button up, the top three buttons undone. I can’t see the rest of his outfit as it’s hidden by the desk.

“Welcome to Kaleidoscope! How may I help you?” He asks, his enthusiastic tone matching his enthusiastic appearance.

“We’re here to see-” I begin.

“Oh, you’re the ones with the scheduled meeting, right? Oh dear, I was hoping you’d come a little later.” The male cuts me off, making me scowl. “Jimin! Come here.”

A second later and a second shorter male with silver hair approaches us, wearing the same uniform as the other male. However this time I can see his pants (just black fitted slacks with a black apron tied around his waist and matching shoes).

“What is it hyung?” The smaller one, Jimin, asks.

“Where is Taehyung? The special guests are here.” The other male says.

“He said he’ll be here in a few minutes, his other job was holding him up.”

The peach haired male sighs before turning back to us.

“I’m very sorry, but I have to ask you to wait for a few minutes. One of our waiters is not here yet.” He says.

“Can’t we just get another one?” Eunae questions.

“No, this one is specialized in taking care of the boss’ special guests. Again, we apologize for the inconvenience.”

Eunae lets out a loud huff before dragging her feet to a nearby bench and plopping down.

“What the hell? How professional are these people? Shouldn’t they have multiple people trained in this kind of stuff? Better yet, they need to make sure that their workers are actually available!” She angrily rants, crossing her arms across her chest.

I merely sigh at her actions, although silently agreeing in my head. Just as I was about to join her on the bench, the door to the restaurant bursts open and a dash of yellow barrels right past me.

“Hoseok hyung, Jimin hyung, I’m here! I’m so sorry for being late, the stupid people at my other job were being difficult. It took so much out of me not to snap, but I knew Namjoon hyung would be mad at me if I did, so I didn’t.” A deep voice rambles out so fast that I can barely understand what’s being said.

I, along with the others, focus on the person who just walked in. He’s a bit shorter than me, but has a relaxed posture that makes him seem shorter, and appears to be barely legal, if not younger. He wears the same uniform as the other two minus the apron, but I assume that’s because he just got here and I can’t help but note how well the slacks hug his feminine curves. Golden blonde hair falls like water, complimenting his smooth, honey skin. However, what catches my attention the most are his eyes - bright emeralds glimmering with a childlike innocence but with an underlying sense of danger.

“You’re right, he would’ve, but how’d it go?” Jimin questions, tossing a black fabric which I recognize to be an apron to the new arrival.

“Same as usual. I was also able to set everything up for when I go back.” The blonde answers, tying the apron around his waist and illuminating his small waist in the process.

“That’s good. Here, take these menus. Tonight’s special guests are here, they’re actually behind you.”

The boy takes several menus, a small notepad, and a pencil before turning to look at the others and I. He looks at me first, emerald eyes scanning me up and down as if he were reading a book so quickly that I narrowly catch what he’s doing. He does the same thing with the others, the action happening in the blink of an eye. Soon his plump, pink lips lift into a box smile, the action endearing to all those who see it.

“Hello, my name is Taehyung and I will be your waiter tonight! Please, follow me.” He says with a small tilt of his head before turning around and heading into the dining section of the restaurant.

Eunae walks next to me as we follow Taehyung, eyes focused hungrily on the male, watching him as though he were a prey and she was the predator.

“I  _ want _ him, Gguk.” She says quietly.

“No.” I respond curtly.

Eunae bites her lip, but nods nonetheless. We continue to follow Taehyung until we reach a private eating area away from everyone else. There’s a long table in the room with twelve seats, five on the longer ends on one on the shorter. Taehyung quickly sets down the six menus at every other seat on the longer ends of the table, facing each other.

“Please take a seat where the menus are.” He says politely, giving us a small, comforting smile.

We do as he says, and I notice him pulling out Eunae’s seat for her and pushing her back in. Eunae gives him a flirtatious smile as she thanks him, her hand on top of his. Taehyung merely says “you’re welcome” completely oblivious to Eunae’s stare. Taehyung goes to stand near the “head” of the table, hands clasped behind his back.

“Before I leave you to look through the menu, there are some things I must go over with you as our special guests. Today you are meeting with Rose on non-violent bases. I am well aware that you all have your own weapons with you currently and will do nothing to confiscate them as I do not have orders to do so at the moment, however I will warn you only once to not do anything to threaten the members - the repercussions will be most severe. I also have information about the members to share with you.

There are six members total in the Rose. Their titles go as the following: the King, Queen, Ace, Jack, Knight, and Joker. Power within the group also ranks from most authority and strength to least  _ except _ for the Joker. The King is the most level headed of the group and the smartest. He’s the one you want to meet for negotiations or if you need help from him regarding business. The Queen is quite caring and kind but only if he likes you - otherwise he’s quite cutthroat and overall not someone you want to anger.

The Ace is someone who does not trust easily and brings new meaning to the phrase “silent but deadly”. Do not, under any circumstances, anger him. The Jack is an overall friendly and easy going person, but another person you don’t want to upset. He’s the one you want to go to if you need to speak with any of the members after this meeting is over. The Knight is extremely protective and despite his appearance, one of the strongest members - not that they all aren’t, of course. All of them, although being extremely dangerous, are rather calm and understanding and never do things without reason.” Taehyung explains as if he’s done it a million times before.

“You forgot about the Joker.” Jackson states.

Taehyung smiles slightly. “I didn’t. I put him last for a reason. Like I said earlier, the ranking system does not apply to Joker. He is, without a doubt, the strongest member out of them all, but he’s also the most mentally unstable. The system does not apply to him merely because he’s too much of a wild card. Upon first meeting him, you’d find him to be perhaps the most docile of the group - he comes off as innocent, kind, loving, and weak. And that, at times, can be true. But as I said, he’s mentally unstable. He kills for fun, he sees absolutely nothing wrong with it. He toys with his victims while they’re alive  _ and _ dead. There are both pros and cons to being affiliated with him, but all I can say is give him a chance because there’s more to him than meets the eye.”

There’s a moment of silence in which everyone soaks up the information. I keep my eyes trained on Taehyung, noticing how his shining eyes have slightly dimmed, as if remembering something less than pleasant.

“When will the members join us?” I ask, my low voice carrying throughout the room.

“After the food has been delivered. They’ll walk in in the order I gave earlier, if you remembered. If not, it's King, Queen, Jack, Ace, Knight, Joker.” Taehyung responds.

“Ace first. Then Jack.” I correct, staring intently at the young waiter. “Earlier you said the order was King, Queen, Ace, Jack, Knight, Joker.”

The boy suddenly smiles brightly, eyes bright with excitement.

“You’re the first one to catch that. I’m glad you did. Yes, you’re correct. The proper order is King, Queen, Ace, Jack, Knight, Joker. Now, I do believe that is all for now. I’ll return in a few minutes to take your orders.” He tells us, still smiling as he leaves.

I watch him as he leaves, finding something strange about the boy.

“He is  _ so hot _ .” Eunae says as soon as he leaves.

“You say that about every guy.” Yugyeom replies.

“I never said it about you. Gguk, I really want him. Please?”

“Can’t you see that he means something to the Rose? Otherwise they wouldn’t have trusted him and  _ only _ him with dealing with their special guests. You aren’t allowed to just kidnap him, no matter how infatuated you are with him.” I tell her, picking up my menu and ignoring my sulking sister.

After maybe five minutes or so Taehyung comes back, notepad out and pen in hand.

“Okay, can I get everyone started on drinks first?” He asks.

“I’ll just take water, please.” Mark says.

“Bourbon for me, please.”

“I’ll take a Sprite.”

“I’ll have a tropical smoothie.”

And then he gets to Eunae.

“I’ll take your special milk, please.” She says in a sultry tone.

Without missing a beat Taehyung replies, “The only ‘special’ milk we give out is banana milk. Would you like that or something else?”

The others try hard not to laugh at his response, even I hold back a small smile.

“An apple martini, please.” Eunae answers dejectedly.

Taehyung jots her answer down before looking at me.

“And for you, sir?”

Maybe I liked the way he called me ‘sir’ a little too much.

“A water as well.”

He nods, writing in his notepad before giving us another gentle smile.

“Do you also want to order or should I come back in a few minutes?”

“We’ll order.” I answer for everyone.

We quickly give him our orders and two minutes later he’s walking away again.

“Great flirting skills there, Eunae.” Bambam teases and at last everyone laughs at Eunae’s failed attempt of wooing the waiter. Well, everyone except Eunae and I.

“Hey, at least you tried to shoot your shot.” Mark tries to comfort her.

“I’m not giving up yet. I will have him.” Eunae announces, determined.

“Eunae, what did I say?” I ask, glancing over at said girl in the seat one over from mine.

“I won’t kidnap him, I promise.”

I merely sigh, knowing that once my sister sets her eyes on something she won’t stop until she gets it. The others make small conversation as we wait for the food to arrive, meanwhile all I can think about is the meeting ahead and the members of the group that has been causing me and many others trouble for so long. I wonder what exactly they’ll be like and what it is they want to discuss. I know there are many things I, personally, want to talk about, but I want to know why they finally decided to show themselves to us. I hadn’t noticed I was thinking for so long until a deep voice grabs my attention.

“Your food will be arriving shortly, by which time I will be relieved as your waiter. Therefore I’ve come to see if you’ve any last minute questions or requests.” Taehyung informs us, standing with his hands behind his back again.

“Can I have your number?” Eunae comes right out and asks.

“I’m very sorry miss, but unless you’re asking for my number to be friends, I’d have to decline.”

“What? Why?”

“I’m not straight.”

“So you don’t find me attractive?”

“Don’t get me wrong, miss, you are very beautiful. I’m just not interested in women.”

“But-”

“Eunae, leave him alone.” I interject, giving her a warning look.

She immediately stops talking, looking down. Taehyung clears his throat, seemingly unfazed by his interaction with Eunae.

“Any other questions or requests?”

“Do you know what this meeting is going to be about?” I ask.

“I’m not able to disclose any information about the details of the meeting.”

“But you do know what it’s going to be about, correct?”

“Correct.”

I nod. “I think that’s all. Thank you for your assistance.”

“You’re welcome. I’ll be taking my leave now. Enjoy your meal.”

He leaves once more and I find myself watching as he leaves, unable to shake the strange feeling I get around him. There’s something about the waiter I can’t figure out, something important. Five minutes pass before our meals come, but they bring in more than what we ordered. I brush it off however, assuming that it’s for the Rose. None of us touch our food once the waiters leave, waiting for our company.

Another five minutes pass when the door opens again and finally the people we’ve been waiting for walk in. The first man is rather tall, his light brown hair parted to the side and falling slightly in front of his dark brown eyes which hide behind a pair of glasses. He’s dressed in a black turtleneck under a black suit jacket and matching pants and shoes. A silver necklace hangs around his neck, a rose hanging on the middle, and he carries a briefcase in his hand.  _ The King. _

The next man is around the same height as the King, and has light pink hair. He’s dressed in an all white suit, a red rose imprinted on the breast of his jacket.  _ The Queen. _ The third one was rather shorter than the first two and sports platinum blonde hair. His dark brown eyes were narrowed and cold, calculating every movement- every breath. He wore a navy button down shirt tucked into black slacks and a matching suit jacket. The first few buttons of his shirt were unbuttoned, and I could see the rose tattoo on his collarbone.  _ The Ace. _

The fourth man was quite a surprise to me. It was the man that greeted us at the front counter, the man with peach hair and a heart shaped smile. He still smiles as he walks into the room, just not as largely as he did when we first arrived. Instead of his waiter garb, he’s dressed in a white button down shirt and a royal blue suit jacket with matching pants, a red rose sitting inside his breast pocket.  _ The Jack. _ The person after him was also a bit of a shock, but makes a bit of sense considering who the Jack is. It was the person he called over to ask where Taehyung was, Jimin. He has on a low cut, silk black shirt beneath a sparkly black jacket, black slacks hugging his legs and a red rose in his silver hair.  _ The Knight _ .

Much like how Taehyung caught my attention when he ran into the restaurant, the last person caught my full attention. The Joker caught my attention. He didn’t wear a suit like the others, but he was even more stunning in the outfit he chose. He has on a black, off shoulder crop top, the long flowy sleeves printed with gold dragons. Black high waisted shorts hug his small waist and thick, honey thighs, lion studs trailing down the fabric and harnesses connecting the shorts to his thighs. Black boots with golden dragons adorn his feet, making him two inches taller. A metal, rose choker wraps around his neck, right above the rose tattoo on the side of his neck, and multiple black silver rings are placed on his dainty fingers.

The Joker caught my attention.

Because Taehyung is the Joker.


	3. 02

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Rose and the Cobras sit down for dinner before the meeting begins

_ Jeongguk _

A large, box-like smile graces Taehyung’s face, the same warm, comforting smile that calms and soothes you. Only now do I notice the red tint on his lips and the hoops bedazzling his ears. Mischievous green eyes find mine and Taehyung sends me a wink before turning in time as the King speaks.

“Good evening, everyone. As Taehyung told you earlier, I am the King, but you may call me Namjoon.” He introduces himself.

One by one they step forward and introduce themselves.

“I am Seokjin, preferably known as Jin. I am the Queen.”

“Yoongi, the Ace.”

“My name is Hoseok and I’m the Jack!”

“I’m Jimin, the Knight.”

Taehyung bounces forward, still beaming that smile of his.

“You’ve probably already guessed who I am, but I’ll introduce myself anyways.” He tells us before bowing ninety degrees, arms out behind him. He stands up slightly, tilting his head slightly. “I’m the Joker, Kim Taehyung.” He says with a chuckle.

He stands up before returning to his spot next to Jimin. Shock doesn’t even begin to describe what my members and I feel as we look at Taehyung. Said male struts forward, hips swaying as he takes a seat in between Eunae and I. The rest of his members sit as well, Namjoon and Jin at the ‘heads’ of the table.

“Please, relax, have fun. This is a peaceful dinner, afterall, we can talk after we’ve eaten.” Namjoon says before picking up his fork and knife.

Surprisingly the others make conversation with our company, making small talk as they eat. I’ve never been one for conversation, especially while I’m eating, so I stay quiet and watch everything. And then-

“A bolt of lightning contains enough energy to toast a hundred thousand slices of bread.” Taehyung randomly says to me.

“What the fuck?” I question once I process what he just told me.

He gives me a glare, but all I see is an angry puppy.

“Hey, it took me five minutes to come up with that! The least you could say is ‘wow, I never knew that before’, not ‘what the fuck’, you emo ass bitch.” He retorts.

I raise my eyebrows, expecting the boy to be brazen but not to this degree. I see him pick up his wine glass, swirling the golden liquid before actually  _ chugging _ it. I scoff, turning back to my plate.

“If this is what you’re like when you’re sober, I’d hate to see you drunk.” I say quietly, but not quiet enough for him to not hear me.

“Oh you think this is alcohol? Hell no, bitch, this is apple juice in a wine glass ‘cause I’m boujee as fuck.”

I snort, unable to hide my laughter though I use my hand to muffle the sounds. Luckily no one catches it and I quickly calm myself down.

“Apple juice? How old are you? Six?” I inquire.

“I’m six plus twelve, my little chikoo.”

“Eighteen, wait. What is a chikoo?”

“You tell me, babaganoosh.”

“The hell is a babaganoosh?”

“I don’t know, what is a babaganoosh?”

“How do you not know?”

“How do  _ you _ not know? Anyways, did you like the gift we sent you this morning?”

I pause, slightly confused from the topic change. It takes me a moment to realize he’s talking about our invitation to this dinner and how it was given to us.

“Do you mean the rings?” I ask, knowing full well that that’s not what he’s talking about.

“No, of course not. I mean the marionettes. Did you like them? Jiminie hyung didn’t, he said they were disturbing. But you don’t think so, right?”

I see his hopeful, expecting green eyes staring at me and can’t help but wonder,  _ is he really the one who made them? How on earth did he come up with it? Let alone follow through with making them. _ And then I remember- he’s the Joker. He said so himself that he’s mentally unstable and loves to play with his victims alive or dead. But still, I have to make sure.

“Why do you want to know?” I question.

“Because I made them, of course. I need feedback to know how to improve next time. The first two weren’t all that good, they seemed pretty dull and emotionless to me, but the third one was okay. Do you have any ideas on what I should do to make them seem more lively?” The way he talks about making human marionettes so normally gives me goosebumps and, strangely, a sense of excitement.

“Have you tried making  _ living _ marionettes?”

“Yes, but they scream too much, it’s so annoying. Especially when I’m trying to relax and listen to the music in the background while I work.”

“What about makeup?”

“Make-” He pauses before gasping loudly, grabbing the attention of a few others. “That’s a great idea!” He squeals, boxy smile on display. “I can’t believe I didn’t think of that! Thank you, Jeonggukie!”

“Oh, so you know my name?”

“ _ Hyung _ , I know a  _ lot _ about you. You didn’t expect us to come into this meeting without knowing who we’re meeting, did you?”

“You made us do it.”

“Uh-uh, I gave you a debrief before we arrived. Technically the meeting doesn’t start until after everyone is done eating which means you still have time to learn about us.”

“And what exactly are you willing to tell?”

“What are you willing to ask?”

I take a glance around the room, noticing that everyone continued on with their conversations since nothing dangerous is happening. Dozens of questions roam around in my head, but I know I can only ask a few since the rest correlate with  _ why _ we’re here, exactly.

“I know we’ve only known about you for six months or so, but you’ve been executing perfect operations since then. No way you were able to perfect group dynamics in that time, so I want to know how long you’ve known each other.” I tell the younger.

“I’ve known Namjoon hyung since I was about six, Yoongi hyung since I was ten, Jin hyung at eleven, and Jimin and Hobi hyung since I was fourteen.”

“If you’re eighteen, how long have you been doing this kind of thing?”

“You mean killing people, torturing people, and other illegal stuff?” I nod. “Since I was eight.”

“Really? And you haven’t run out of ideas to try on your victims yet?”

I’m not quite sure how I became so comfortable talking to a person who’s four years younger than me about murder, but I assume it’s because of Taehyung himself. Though he’s a murderer (and a psychopathic one, at that), he still - somehow - has a youthful innocence and a calming, yet excitable aura around him. It’s almost a challenge to not feel comfortable around him. At least, to me it is.

“Sometimes I do, but then I binge watch Codename: Kids Next Door, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends, The Grim Adventures of Billy and Mandy and Bubble Guppies and boom- inspiration.” Taehyung answers.

“How the hell do you get inspiration from  _ children’s _ shows?”

“I dunno man, the voices got funny ways of telling me to do things. But the human marionettes came from Five Nights at Freddy’s. Oh shit, what if I make human animatronics? Wait- can I do that? Do I even have the resources for it?”

“Should I be concerned?”

“No, but you should probably prepare yourself. And that’s only  _ if _ it works out well. Jiminie~”

The silver haired male sitting across from Taehyung looks up from his conversation with Jackson.

“What?” He asks.

“I want your potato cocks.”

Jackson chokes on his food and I raise my eyebrows, meanwhile Jimin slides over his plate of french fries to Taehyung who happily eats them.

“Potato cocks? Seriously?” I question the blonde.

“Why? You want one?”

“No thanks.”

Taehyung shrugs and continues to munch on his fries. The rest of dinner seems to fly by even though I kept to myself. Soon enough, our plates were collected and we were about to begin our meeting, we were just waiting for one last conversation to end. One between Eunae, Jimin, Jackson, and, of course, Taehyung. I didn’t pay much attention to the beginning of what was happening, but one specific sentence spoken by a certain blonde certainly grabbed it.

“Listen......I’m not saying I’m a hoe or anything, but I’d back it up so damn hard for Cardi B.” You can say I was intrigued after that.

Jackson and Eunae were laughing profusely at Taehyung’s statement while Jimin just smirked, already aware of the younger’s love for the female rapper. Still, Taehyung continues talking, even gaining the attention of a few others.

“Like seriously! Once I was in the club about to kill a bitch and the police came in right when Money started playing and they told me to drop my weapon and I shit you not I fucking  _ slut dropped _ .”

There are more rounds of laughter and snickers after that. I can’t help the small, amused smile at the image of Taehyung faced with policemen on one side and a target on the other, gun in his hand, slut dropping and popping out his perky ass in time with “shake a little ass, get a little bag, take it to the store. Get a little cash, shake it real fast and get a little more”.

“But  _ wait _ , it gets better! So obviously everyone is shook because, come on, who wouldn’t be if a seventeen year old holding a gun just suddenly slut drops? But anygays! I’m fucking dancing- right? - and I’m obviously fucking getting it, I’m the baddest bitch on the floor,  _ but I still have a fucking job to do. _ I obviously gotta be careful cause there are fucking police  _ right there _ , ya follow me? So what did I do?  _ I started twerking on the cops. _ ” Taehyung continues, laughing while he talks.

Eunae and Jackson are practically dying of laughter right now and most of the others are on their way there now. Only Namjoon, Jin, Yoongi and I aren’t outright laughing, though we do look at the storyteller with amused smiles.

“It was the funniest fucking thing! They were so damn confused! There was even a lady cop and I was grinding all up on her! But  _ then _ , my girl Cardi goes ‘bitch I will pop on your pops. Bitch I will pop on whoever’ and I  _ shot _ the dude I came to the club for and fucking  _ ran _ while the cops were still confused and distracted!” Taehyung finishes.

Everyone is laughing now, even I find myself chuckling at Taehyung’s antics. After a good minute or two, almost everyone has gained their composure.

“Thank you, Taehyung, for that story. But please, I do  _ not _ want to hear about my son backing it up to Cardi B.” Namjoon says, a fond and amused smile on his face, causing Taehyung to smile and chuckle. “Now, let’s get onto business, shall we?”


	4. 03

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jeongguk is focused on the meeting, but Taehyung is focused on Jeongguk

I wasn’t as nervous or consumed with as many thoughts as I was when I first received the invitation to this meeting, nor as confused as when Taehyung gave us a little information about himself and his members. I was calm, something I didn’t expect to be when walking in here. Sure, I could most definitely feign a sense of tranquility, but I know my mind would be anything but that. Better yet, I was focused on the warmth and softness of Taehyung’s fingers as he plays with the rings on my fingers, my hands on my lap. I could tell that Taehyung wasn’t paying much attention to the conversation, though he did a good job at hiding it.

“Now, as I’ve stated multiple times before, this is a friendly meeting. On both my behalf and the others, we mean you no harm, only help.” Namjoon begins.

I can’t help but raise an eyebrow at the other male, going into business mode.

“And how, exactly, are you helping us by killing our men?” I ask.

Namjoon picks up the black briefcase he brought with him that’s been sitting idly beside him. He unlocks it before taking out a few files from inside and handing it to me.

“Those are the reports of the people from your mafia we’ve disposed of for about seven months prior to us killing them.” He tells me.

I look through the files, my jaw clenching and anger bubbling as I read. After the fourth or fifth report I shut the files, getting the gist of what’s been going on, and handing it off to Eunae who reads a few and passes it along. I lift my hands from my lap and set them on the table, leaning forward slightly. However Taehyung grabs my left hand and sets it in his own lap, continuing to play with my rings like a small child.

I don’t take my hand back.

“How the hell did you get this information?” I question.

“People tend to talk using the right incentives.” Namjoon simply answers.

“More like the right torturing methods.” I hear Taehyung say softly beside me, so quiet that only I hear him.

“About a year ago one of your middle class members had an altercation with Hoseok, a very big one considering Hoseok rarely gets into arguments. The man said some rather.......interesting... things. One thing led to another and we ended up kidnapping him and getting a bit of information out of him. Information about a plot to dethrone you amongst members of your mafia and your biggest rivals.” Namjoon continues.

I take a moment to digest the information.  _ After this meeting, I’m going to make sure to do a late spring cleaning. _

“You took it upon yourselves to kill the rats in my mafia and my enemies. Why?” I ask.

“Simple. As a peace offering.”

I furrow my brows slightly at Namjoon’s answer, but he merely continues.

“For the past ten years I’ve spent my life doing illegal things to keep my family alive and safe. In doing so, we’ve made quite a few enemies, especially after our most recent actions. Perhaps now we may be doing well, not leaving behind a trace and executing jobs perfectly, but who’s to say that we won’t mess up in the future? I have no interest in expanding our little circle and business and creating an actual mafia, but I do know that if I want to continue keeping my family as safe as it is now, we will have to make some sort of plan - a safety cushion-”

“You want to ally with us.” I cut him off, connecting the dots.

He nods. “Out of everyone in the underworld, allying ourselves with you would prove to be the best option. We haven’t crossed you in any way, you’re also quite powerful and demand a lot of respect, and you’re probably one of the only honest and trustable men around.”

“And what exactly would we get out of it? Yes, you may have gotten rid of an infestation problem for me, however you carry your own baggage as well. I need to know what good it would do me to work with you.”

“You’ve already seen what we can do, but what if I told you that what you saw was just a fraction of our abilities? It’s just sitting idly by, never reaching its full potential, being used for one purpose that, at the moment, doesn’t call for much work. With that kind of power, a man can rule cities. A power that can be yours, if you choose.”

I’ll admit it, Taehyung wasn’t lying when he said Namjoon is the one to go to for negotiations. He’s got a way with words and knows what to offer. I glance at my other members, trying to gauge what they think of this. Mark and Jackson seem intrigued, Bambam looks curious, Yugyeom doesn’t look too convinced, and Eunae looks about ready to accept them as allies. Just as I’m about to turn away from my sister, I catch Taehyung’s gaze. He looks at me with large, green eyes so deep and confounding that looking in them was like wandering through an unknown forest.

The smallest sliver of a smile was on his cherry colored lips and for a moment I felt completely vulnerable to him. It was as if he already knew what I was thinking, what choice I would make. He knew. He was encouraging me.

“I can’t condone becoming allies with you, however I do have another proposition for you - one I think will better suit your situation.” I tell Namjoon, breaking eye contact with Taehyung in order to look at the other male.

“Oh? And what will that be?” He questions.

“Join my mafia. Becoming allies, although a good idea, won’t do much good considering not many in the underworld believe that the ally system actually works. Groups are just using one another for selfish purposes and will drop them once they’ve run out of usefulness or become a threat. They’ll attack you regardless of if I’m your ally or not. However, if you join my mafia, we can secure your safety as no one would dare to attack my members, especially those of the status that you will have if you join. Since you’re all so used to working with one another, you’ll form a sub-unit and go on missions together. I have different sub-units within the ranks, so it won’t be much of an issue. How does that sound to you?”

Namjoon shares looks with the rest of his members, having a silent conversation with them through looks only. While he does so, I feel Taehyung tapping the back of my hand. At first I paid no mind to it, then I realized that he’s doing it in a specific pattern. Morse code. It takes me a minute to decipher what he’s telling me since I missed the first few taps, but eventually I get it.  _ You got them. Congratulations. _ I glance at him, only to find him looking at Namjoon, although I do catch the soft smile on his lips. I give his thigh a light squeeze, letting him know I got his message.

“I think that sounds wonderful. We are willing to accept your offer.” Namjoon says, showing off two dimples as he smiles.

I give him a friendly smile back, or at least the best I can manage. He stands up and I follow suit, shaking his hand.

“I’m afraid our time has run out, but I would like to discuss the finer details with you. We have something to do tomorrow, so we aren’t available, but we will be on Thursday. I’ll give you the address and time, is that okay with you?” Namjoon inquires.

“Yes, of course.” I answer.

“Good. Let me grab my notepad and pen.”

He goes into his briefcase for said objects, meanwhile I take a look around the room. I notice everyone has also stood up and spread out, quietly talking with one another. But it was the absence of a green-eyed, blonde haired boy that had me frowning.

“Here, this is where we’ll meet. Just ring the doorbell and we’ll let you in.” Namjoon snaps me out of my reverie, handing me a slip of paper.

“Thank you. We will be there.” I respond, putting the paper in my pants pocket.

He nods and walks off, going to talk with Jin and Yoongi. I make my way to Eunae who’s in a conversation with Hoseok, Mark, and Bambam, and place my hand on her shoulder to grab her attention.

“I’m going to smoke, then head to the car. Let me know when you’re done here.” I tell her.

She nods and I start to leave.

“The smoking section is on the roof! Just turn left and head straight and you’ll come to the stairs!” Hoseok calls after me.

I send him a quick “thank you” and leave, following his directions to the roof. I take out a pack of cigarettes as a rush of cool air smacks me in the face. It’s quite dark outside, but it’s hidden by the lights coming from below. Roses sit in flower pots all around as well as benches and tables with ash trays. I head to a random bench, about to sit down when I notice something: Taehyung laying on the bench, one leg propped up and the other swinging off the side, eyes closed.

“What are you doing out here?” I ask, causing his eyes to open and a serene smile to rest upon his face.

“Enjoying the night air, of course.” He answers, his voice as light as the breeze. “What about you?”

I shake my pack of cigarettes, bringing his attention to them. “Came to smoke.”

He sits up and turns his upper body so that he’s facing me, still smiling as he pats the space where his head just was. I take his invitation to sit, just barely making it down before he’s laying his head on my lap. I raise an eyebrow at his actions, wondering just how he got so comfortable around me so fast. I mean, I did meet him only two or three hours ago. Taehyung practically purrs in delight as he cozies himself down, giving me a lazy smile once he stops moving.

“Comfortable?” I ask sarcastically.

“Very. You have nice thighs.”

“Thanks.”

I take out a cigarette, holding it between my lips as I search for a lighter in my pockets, mentally cursing when I can’t find one. I usually carry one with me, but I guess I forgot tonight. Suddenly a silver lighter pops up into my face, a slender, tan hand holding it. My eyes trail down to Taehyung who waits for me to take the lighter he somehow produced.

“Why do you carry a lighter?” I question, lighting my cigarette before returning the lighter.

“Yoongi hyung smokes as well, so I carry a spare lighter in case something happens to his.”

I take a long drag of the death stick and let it run through my lungs before tilting my head up as I blow the smoke out. I didn’t notice, but my free hand was in Taehyung’s hair, running my fingers through the strands. I can’t remember if Taehyung made me do it or if I did it myself.

“You weren’t paying attention in the meeting.” I state softly.

“Didn’t need to.” He responds, just as quietly.

“Why not? It relates to you, doesn’t it?”

“Mmm, it does. But I didn’t see a point in paying attention since I already knew how it would end.”

“Oh? Psychic?”

He chuckles. “No, just good at reading people and predicting how they’ll react to certain situations. Yet another reason why I’m the one who brings our special guests back.”

“How many have you brought back?”

“Enough.”

“Enough for what?”

“For people to be pissed when they don’t come back alive.”

I nod and bring my cigarette back up to my lips.

“What do you think of the deal?” Taehyung asks.

“It’s an interesting one. You must’ve been desperate enough to do the things you did in order to get me to agree.”

“Not desperate, protective. We love our family too much to see anything bad happen to it, we’ll do anything to keep it safe.”

I pause, taking another puff of nicotine and exhaling.

“You’re lucky to have a family like that.” I note.

“Oh, Ggukie, don’t you get it? Soon enough, you’ll be a part of this family too.”

I smile slightly down at Taehyung before flicking away the growing ash on my cigarette.

“You have really nice hands, y’know?” Taehyung randomly tells me, causing me to chuckle a little at his randomness.

“Do I now?”

“Mmm. But you know what would make them even better?”

“What?”

“If they were wrapped around my neck.”

I raise an eyebrow, unable to help the small smirk growing on my face.

“Will they now?” I question.

Taehyung nods, smirking a little as well as he bites his lower lip. He sits up and - surprisingly but also not quite because this is Taehyung - sits on my lap, legs on either side of my thighs and arms lazily wrapping around my neck. My free hand instinctively goes to his waist, keeping him in place as I look at him curiously. Taehyung provides no explanation for his actions, just plays with my hair, a thoughtful look in his eyes as if he’s seeing me but not seeing me at the same time. I leave him to his devices, instead trailing my gaze down his body.

His choker from earlier has disappeared, giving me a better view of the rose tattoo that was beneath it. Placed under the rose is a geometric tattoo that covers his whole shoulder and across his chest, just under his collarbone, is the word  _ Gucci _ in cursive writing. I let my hand graze over the ink, feeling Taehyung do the same as he now studies the tattoos on my body that outnumber his own.

“How many are there?” Taehyung whispers, so quiet as to not disturb the ambient atmosphere set up around us.

“Enough to cover all of my abdomen, a sleeve on my right arm, and a few on my left arm and back.” I murmur back.

He nods slowly and I inhale the last of my cigarette, pressing the still smoking end to the bench seat and killing the flames before flicking it aside.

“May I?” Taehyung asks once I’m about to release the smoke.

I look at him in confusion, but somehow understand what he wants when he leans in, lips a breath away from mine. I part my lips, allowing the smoke to seep out and into Taehyung’s awaiting cavern. The younger takes in the toxic gas, letting it circulate through his system before tilting his head back and letting it come out of his nose like a dragon. My eyes, however, are fixed on his smooth, exposed neck and, before Taehyung can look back at me, wrap my hand around the delicate skin. I give him a teasing squeeze, effectively pulling a sweet whine from the boy.

Maybe I liked the sound he made a little too much.

Maybe I liked the way my hand looked wrapped around his neck a little too much.

Maybe I liked the way he sat perfectly in my lap a little too much.

Maybe I liked the way Taehyung looks down at me with hooded eyes and plump, cherry lips a little too much.

Maybe I liked Taehyung a little too much.


	5. 04

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Taehyung is interesting..... and cuddly when sleepy.

_ Jeongguk _

“You like him, don’t you?” Eunae asks as we make our way to the car.

“What do you mean?”

“You like Taehyung. I saw you two talking and Taehyung holding your hand during the meeting. You didn’t even pull away from him.”

We all begin to discuss the meeting that just took place and what we thought of the Rose. Well, our new members, actually. The others typically wait for me to give my opinion first, which I’m not entirely sure why, but they do.

“The way I like him is different from how you think I like him, Eunae. I don’t want to date him, I can’t have those kinds of feelings for someone I’ve known for only a few hours. I might like him as a friend, but I don’t know yet. I’d have to spend more time with him.” I tell my sister, holding open the car door for her before sliding in myself.

“What do you think of him? Personality wise, I mean?” Yugyeom questions. “I didn’t get to talk to him myself, but he seems strange.”

“He’s......interesting. He’s childish and talks about disturbing things as though it were the most normal thing. And he’s got this....this aura round him that’s hard to describe. It’s calming but at the same time energetic and mischievous. He’s both straightforward and devious. No, not devious, not entirely, he just doesn’t tell you everything off the bat, like one of those heroes aids in a fiction story. He’s confusing to say the least, but not in a bad way.”

“Do you think it was a good idea letting them join? I mean, they’ve done some pretty messed up shit to a  _ lot _ of people. They gotta have a bunch of enemies.” Mark notes.

“I think the pros match the cons. And besides, considering they just took out the leaders of our three biggest competitors, we’ve got a chance to take them down once and for all. Once that’s done, we’ll be the strongest mafia in South Korea.”

“They did do that, didn’t they? This is one huge mess.” Jackson sighs.

For some reason, Taehyung comes into mind as Jackson’s statement. At the thought of everything being a mess, I could almost hear him saying (and mentally agreeing) that-

“Maybe, but that makes it exciting.”

The others then begin to discuss what they think of the newest edition to our mafia and the situation we’re in, but I don’t pay attention. They’re just proving what Taehyung said of the members to be true and pointing out views of the deal that I’ve already looked over prior to my decision. I close my eyes and rest my head on the headrest, mind completely blank.

\---

The morning sun wakes me up the morning of the meeting, golden rays of light seeping through grey, silk curtains and cascading onto my face. I lay in bed for a few minutes, mentally preparing myself to wake up before actually sitting up, casting a hand through my bed hair. I take a glance at the clock on my bedside table, seeing that it’s seven in the morning. Namjoon said to meet him at nine, so that gives me a good two hours to prepare.

I head to my en suite bathroom, quickly getting in the shower just to stand beneath the hot water most of the time. After washing myself and rinsing off while the water is still warm, I turn off the water and step out the shower, immediately being attacked by cold air despite all the hot steam around. I dry off and quickly brush my teeth before leaving the bathroom and getting dressed in my usual black attire. I put on a black turtleneck sweater and fitted black pants with matching dress shoes, very similar to Namjoon’s outfit two days ago.

I strap on a Rolex on my wrist and style my hair in it’s usual parted style before grabbing a long black coat, holding it over my shoulder as I head down to the kitchen. I won’t put the coat on until we leave. Eunae sits on a barstool when I walk in, already eating breakfast. She wears a red sweater tucked into a black plaid skirt and black knee high boots.

“Breakfast is on the stove.” She says, more invested in her phone than me, not that I really care.

I set my coat on the table before heading to the cabinets and grabbing a plate. I quickly place food on my plate and sit down across my sister, quietly eating. After a while, Eunae gets up and leaves, still immersed in her phone. I finish my food, placing the used dishes in the sink and grabbing my coat. I check its pockets for my phone, cigarettes and lighter before heading to the car. I send a quick text to Eunae and the others, telling them to meet me in the car.

“So, where are we meeting this time?” Jackson asks, entering the car.

“I sent you the address already.” I respond.

“I- well damn, so much for starting a conversation.”

I don’t respond. Within a few minutes or so the others finally come and we make our way to the meeting spot. I wasn’t quite sure what to expect, maybe an office building or a small establishment, something professional. Instead the car stops in the driveway of a modern chalet house in front of a lake.

“Woah, nice place. You think they actually live here?” Bambam questions as we leave the car.

“What do you think?” Yugyeom retorts.

Bambam mumbles something under his breath as he gets out of the car, causing Yugyeom to hit him on the back of the head. It’s chilly as soon as I step out of the car, fresh morning dew coating the ground. I assume it’s usually colder around here in the morning because of the lake right behind the house. We make our way up to the front door and I ring the bell, listening to the ringtone. Less than a second later the door opens, revealing Jin in casual clothes; a pink t-shirt tucked into black jeans and matching shoes.

“Good morning. Namjoon is waiting for you in his office. He’d like to meet with just Jeongguk, if you don’t mind.” He says, letting us into the house.

“That’s fine.”

“Yah! Jimin! Come take our guests to the drawing room!”

“It’s too early for your yelling.” A rather displeased Jimin complains, a cup of coffee in one hand and a chocolate croissant in the other.

“Don’t complain and do as I say.”

“Yes, your majesty.”

While Jimin leads the others away, I follow Jin up a flight of stairs and down a hallway. At the end of the hall he stops at a door, knocking on it three times.

“Who is it?” I hear Namjoon ask from the other side.

“It’s Jin. I brought Jeongguk.”

“Let him in.”

Jin immediately opens the door and steps back to allow me in. I give him a quiet ‘thanks’ and head in, the door shutting behind me. The walls are painted a bluish-grey color and several large windows allow the natural sunlight to light the room. Namjoon sits behind a wooden desk with his laptop in front of him, dressed in a white button down pushed up to the elbows, a royal blue tie and a brown vest. Behind him is a bookshelf/desk combination, files and books neatly organized.

“Glad to see you’re here. Come, take a seat.” Namjoon says, giving me a small smile.

I take a seat in one of the chairs opposite of the other, placing my interlocked hands on my lap.

“So, what would you like to discuss first?” I ask.

“I suppose initiation and a description of what exactly you want my team to do for you.”

“We initiate lower ranked members with a contract. Once they’ve climbed the ranks a bit and proven their loyalties then they can take the blood oath that presents them as a full fledged member. However, all members do receive a tattoo that identifies them with us. The tattoo is of a cobra. Lower ranked members get a regular cobra, higher ranked members get a king cobra.”

“And what rank, exactly, will we receive?”

“You will be a sub-unit, as I already stated the other night. There are three ranks within sub-units and they are gold, silver, bronze - I’m sure you can identify which one is the highest. Every sub-unit starts out at bronze, and I’m afraid that your team will be no different. Although I’m sure it will be rather easy for you to rise to gold.”

He nods thoughtfully, about to ask another question when the door unexpectedly opens.

“Joonie…” A soft yet deep voice whines.

I turn around to see Taehyung walking in. His blonde hair is a mess atop his head and he’s drowning in an oversized, white hoodie with a pink cat face stitched on the front. A purple blanket slips down his shoulders which he tiredly shrugs back up, eyes half shut. He lazily makes his way over, dragging his feet across the floor.

“Tae, what are you doing awake?” Namjoon asks the sleepy boy.

“Yoonie weft.” He mumbles, rubbing his eyes with sweater paws as he yawns.

“Go back to bed, bub, I’ll send Jiminie up.”

Taehyung mumbles something under his breath that neither of us can quite catch. He drops his hand and I see his eyes open some, looking at Namjoon before catching sight of me. The younger one pads his way over, both Namjoon and I slightly confused when he stands in front of me. Taehyung opens his eyes once more, slightly squinting as he looks at me, before he plops down into my lap.

Namjoon looks at him in shock, I look at him with curiosity as he continues to make himself comfortable on my lap. His legs are bent at the knees so he can fit within the small space the chair gives us and his fists bunch both his blanket and the front of my shirt. The blanket comes up his neck, giving me a view of his soft cheeks and pouty lips as he rests his head on my chest, his hair tickling my chin. After a few minutes he stops moving, his breathing slow and relaxed as he falls asleep.

“I’m sorry about him, he tends to be cuddly when he’s sleepy. I’ll take him back to his room.” Namjoon says, beginning to stand up.

“No, it’s fine. He looks comfortable.” I respond, carefully moving my arms to wrap around the sleeping boy, holding him securely on my lap.

“O-oh, right. Are you sure?”

“Yes. He looks rather tired, did he not sleep last night?”

Namjoon sighs and relaxes into his chair.

“No, not really. He didn’t go to sleep until some time around five or six.” He tells me.

“Insomnia?”

“Not exactly. He had what we call a ‘spike’ yesterday. It wasn’t extreme but it wasn’t the easiest either.”

“What’s a spike?”

The male pauses, thinking deeply as he stares at the desk. Slowly, his eyes go to me, then to Taehyung, and back to me.

“I suppose I should tell you since you’re, technically, our boss and this will probably affect Taehyung’s working ability.” Namjoon begins, pinching the bridge of his nose. “Taehyung’s mental state isn’t the most stable. I know you think you know, but you really don’t. Everything that you’ve seen - Taehyung’s  _ gifts _ to you - they’re all only the aftermath of his mentality and it’s somewhat controlled by us. Seeing it in person while he’s doing those things and of his own accord is something completely different. I’ve known Taehyung almost his entire life, so believe me when I say he has a very good handle on controlling himself.

“But Taehyung can only take so much before he snaps. Yesterday Taehyung was on a mission with some of the others and one of the targets triggered him. I don’t know exactly what they did or said to him to trigger him, but it happened and Taehyung ended up spiking. A spike is basically when Taehyung loses control and lets his madness control him. He goes into this headspace that no one can take him out of, he has to come out of it himself. I don’t know much about what happens in that headspace, but Taehyung says that the voices in his head take control.

“They mentally abuse him and make him relive some of his worst memories and the only thing that can get them to stop is bloodshed, so whenever he spikes he ends up massacring people. After he comes out of that headspace, he’ll refuse to do anything. Won’t speak, won’t move, won’t eat, and most  _ definitely _ won’t sleep. He’s scared the voices will take over again when he sleeps so he doesn’t.”

I looked at Taehyung while Namjoon talked, wondering just what goes on in that head of his.  _ He’s a victim of his own mind. _ I gently card my hand through Taehyung’s hair, watching as he subconsciously nuzzles his head closer into my hand.

“How often does this happen?” I question, keeping my voice low so as to not wake up the blonde.

“We were able to limit it down to once or twice a month. Knowing what sets him off helps, but sometimes there are ones we don’t know about.”

“What exactly are his triggers?”

“Just about anything that reminds him too much of his past.”

“Which is?”

“I’m afraid that’s not my place to tell. Taehyung will tell you, but only when he feels he can trust you and is ready.”

I nod understandingly. “Shall we continue the meeting?”

Namjoon nods and we pick up where we left off, speaking in hushed tones. Sometimes we’ll pause because Taehyung begins to move around, changing positions in his sleep, but he’s too deep in sleep to notice what’s going on around him. An hour and a half later and everything has been settled. Namjoon and his group will come to live on my compound with the rest of my members and I today and get a tour by Jackson and Mark while Taehyung is still asleep.

Once he’s awake, I’ll give him a quick rundown of everything that’s going on and a tour of the place. We’ll reconvene with the rest of Taehyung’s group after that and they’ll complete the blood oath and get their tattoos. Tomorrow my right hand men, the Rose and I will come up with a plan to get rid of the now leaderless enemies of mine.

“Well then, I suppose I can take you to Taehyung’s room since he’s still asleep. Although I can’t guarantee that you’ll be able to let go, he’s like a koala when he sleeps.” Namjoon jokes, smiling at the sleeping blonde as he stands up.

“You’re right. He’s got one hell of a hold on my shirt right now.” I reply.

I hook my arms under Taehyung, one under the back of his knees the other around his back, and lift him bridal style as I stand up.

“Lead the way.” I tell Namjoon.


	6. 05

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Mr. Steal Your Girl

_Taehyung_

_ The feeling of my ribs being broken overwhelms me as yet another punch is thrown at me. I gasp for air, warm red blood climbing its way up my throat. I cough up as much of it as I can, the sharp pain in my chest nearly making me stop. There are chuckles around the room as I slowly collect myself, wearily lifting my heavy head up. I stare at the now blurry figure in front of me, panting for a few seconds before I manage to smirk. _

_ “I made your bitch scream louder than this last night. I bet I’ll be able to walk better than she can after how hard I fucked her.” I say slyly, laughing maniacally at the look on his face. _

_ “You fucking bitch!” _

_ He punches me in the stomach, making me lose my breath again, but I only laugh. I throw my head back, barking out laughter as I slowly make eye contact again. _

_ “Is that all you got?! Come on! Give me your best, you fucking pussy! Hurry up before I get bored with you!” I order. _

_ Kill them. Kill them all. Tear their innards out, break their bones, claw out their eyes. Break them, beat them, kill them. Decorate the room with their blood. End them, end them, end them! _

_ “And what the hell can you do? You’re tied up! You can’t do shit!” A man shouts. _

_ “Be careful what you say.” I say with a snicker. “Or you may just find yourself in a bit of trouble, just like that little girl of yours. What was her name again? Sunmi? Oh what a delightful thing she was. Her screams were just delectable. Too bad she passed out right when I cut her hands off. We could have had so much fun.” _

_ “Y-you monster. You’re a demon!” _

_ “Don’t you dare belittle me like that! I am no demon, darling, I am the King of Hell himself! I am what your nightmares are made of, the monster under your bed at night! I am the embodiment of sins and the collector of souls so believe me when I say that your souls are  _ mine _.” _

I slowly blink my eyes open, the ending of my dream slowly fading as I gain consciousness.  _ But I can still hear their screams and feel their blood. _ And it feels damn good. I turn to lay on my back, not caring that I’m not in my own room or any other room in our house. I’ve gone to sleep in my room and woken up somewhere else so many times that I’ve lost count. Slowly, I reach my hand out to the ceiling, staring at it, remembering just how many sins I’ve committed with it.

“Forget you had one of those?” The low voice cuts through the silence.

It wasn’t a rough, jagged slash. It didn’t disrupt the calmness. It was swift and sharp, one fluid movement that left no ripples. It was low and kind of rough, but there was a certain gentleness to it.  _ I could never quite understand the meaning of being gentle. _ I slowly bring my attention to the dark haired male leaning against the doorway to a place I can’t quite make out. Even from here I feel small compared to him.

He’s a few inches taller than me, his straight posture accentuating that fact, and his dark onyx eyes always seem to swallow me whole. They’re endless pools of dark, a black hole, the shadows of shadows. His face held no emotions, but it doesn’t matter, his eyes hold it all. Black clothing hugs him in all the right places - the turtle neck, the pants, the shoes - he was a walking work of art. He screamed mystery and danger and though I, myself, have quite the reputation, I find myself defenseless under his gaze.

“No. Forgot what I used them for.” My voice comes out stronger than I thought it would, deeper than I imagined, but I guess it’s the result of sleeping for so long and this being my first sentence spoken since I woke up.

“Did you remember?” Jeongguk asks, still carrying that calm and quiet tone of his.

“I always do.”

I bring the upper half of my body up, wearily looking at my hands that begin to hide themselves beneath my white hoodie, pink paws stitched onto the ends of the sleeves.

“I always remember, just like I always go back to it. It’s beyond the point of an addiction. Now it’s a necessity. Shame, isn’t it? A shame that someone so young has to spill blood in order to survive.” I let out a light chuckle, amused by my own fate.

“Who knows, maybe some good can come out of it. If you kill the right people.”

There it is. That comment. That  _ one _ comment. He doesn’t degrade me for being so messed up. He doesn’t tell me I’m strange. He doesn’t tell me that what I do is disturbing. He makes no comment on my fucked up tendencies. It’s almost as if he treats me like I’m  _ normal _ even if the topic is anything but that.

“Maybe…” The words came out as a whisper.

I push the silk, black blankets off of me, cold air nipping at my exposed legs, the satin pink shorts I wear so short they disappear beneath my hoodie, as I slip off of the bed.

“Where are the others?” I question while I stretch, my bones cracking and popping as I move.

“Settling into their rooms at this time, I’d imagine.”

“We moved?”

Black hair falls in front of black eyes as the male nods. His pale, tattooed hands contrast greatly with his hair as he reaches up to push it back.

“You’ll be staying on my compound from now on, as members of my mafia.” He tells me.

“Everyone in your mafia lives here?”

“Not in this house, specifically, but on the same plot of land. Your group is a little special, so you live in the main house.”

A slow nod is what I give to let the other know I heard him.

“Did they, perhaps, leave a bag or something for me?” I inquire, lazily raking a hand through my hair.

“Yeah. It’s behind you, next to the bed.”

“Thanks.”

The black book bag sits patiently by the bed, waiting to be opened and its contents to be unpacked. I lift the bag up and set it on the edge of the bed, the sound of the zipper filling the quiet atmosphere.  _ Its sound is not as calming nor as gentle as Jeongguk. _ Inside I find a change of clothes, a few toiletries, and a black case.

“Bathroom is over there. Use whatever you need. Afterwards I have some things to tell you.” Jeongguk’s voice is more authoritative now, but he’s still got that softness to it.

I head towards the direction that he pointed me to, noticing that it’s also the same place he was leaning just a second ago. Speaking of, when did he move? I do a quick double check and see that Jeongguk did, in fact, move from the doorway of the bathroom and now begins to make the bed I was previously sleeping in.  _ Fast and silent, interesting. _ The change from hardwood floor to marble has me shivering slightly, much preferring cold wood over cold marble.

Just like the bedroom, the bathroom was nothing but black and white with the occasional grey here and there. It doesn’t bother me much, but it’s also not my favorite color combination.  _ He needs a little color in his monochrome world. _ I find my body wash and shampoo and conditioner before I make my way to the shower, stripping off my hoodie and shorts as I do so. After familiarizing myself with the controls to the shower, I get straight to work with cleaning myself up and washing my hair.

I cut the shower short since Jeongguk has some things to tell me, and wrap a big, fluffy towel around my body as I step out. I grab my bag which was sitting by the sink, pulling out the articles of clothing left behind. Green, camo joggers cover my legs and I dress my upper half in a black hoodie with white words written on the sleeves beneath a rather loosely fitting black, hoodie shirt. I pull a black face mask over my head, leaving it off for now, and slip on a pair of black socks followed by black Vans. For the final touch I plop a black hat over my still damp hair and pull the hood over that.

Completely dressed, I finally take out the black case now at the bottom of the bag and set it on the counter. Unlocking it, I find seven various knives inside. Although I know my way around a gun quite well, I prefer knives instead. I also never go anywhere without one of my many blades, I always have at least one on me even if it doesn’t look like it. Alongside the knives are different knife harnesses that tie on different parts of my body.

I grab one of the harnesses, lifting up my shirts before attaching the harness around my stomach. I place the two longer knives inside the harness and put my shirts back down, making sure it looks normal before continuing. Sliding up my sleeves, I put on four harnesses, two on each arm, and slip the four four inch throwing knives inside before putting my sleeves in their original position. I put the last harness around my right leg, closer to my ankle, and sheathe the last knife.

After giving myself a once over in the mirror to make sure everything looks fine, I stuff the now empty case back into the bookbag. I quickly grab my toothbrush and toothpaste and brush my teeth. Finally satisfied with everything, I pick up the bookbag and leave the bathroom, finding Jeongguk sitting on the edge of the bed, looking at something on his phone. He looks up once he hears the door open, endless pools of darkness shamelessly looking me up and down.

I don’t feel uncomfortable under his gaze. I don’t feel the usual coldness that he has around him. I don’t feel like he’s undressing me with his eyes, a look I get all too often when I go out. I don’t feel like he’s secretly looking at me with hatred and rage.

I feel safe, I feel warm. I feel normal, or at least as normal as one can be in this lifestyle. He looks at me with a soft and knowing, yet strong and curious gaze. He had me feeling like putty with only a look and, for a moment, I think I looked at him the same way as well.

“Come take a seat.” Jeongguk tells me, his dark orbs trained on me.

I take steady steps to where he sits, slipping off the book bag and dropping it to the floor before sitting down a few feet away from Jeongguk.

“So, what is it that we need to go over?” I ask.

“Just what Namjoon and I talked about during the meeting and what will happen with you and the rest of your team now.”

I nod, making sure to pay attention to what he says. I can’t just “predict” what’s going to happen since I wasn’t there (or rather conscious) during the meeting.

“I already told you that you’ll be staying on my compound from now on. I don’t usually let groups stay in my house, but I also did say that your group is special. For one thing, you’ll be creating a sub-unit together, it’s better to keep you all together since you’ve been together for so long and exert brilliant group dynamics. Most of my sub-units have a singular purpose - infiltration, medics, decoys - whatever you can think of. But your team specializes in all of that, and I want to put your talents to their full potential, not just stick you with one job.

“As such, your team will be my ‘ace in the hole’. You’ll have access to all operations and you’ll have more work freedom than most teams. You’ll start out at bronze level like all of my other sub-units, that I can’t change, but I’m sure you’ll be able to climb to gold within no time. Your team, essentially, is a skeleton key - you both have the access to take any job and use any means to complete it, and you’ll also give me access to greater fortune. Make sense so far?”

I nod again, liking the fact that he isn’t taking me away from my family or restricting us in any way.

“Good, that’s the first reason why you’re staying in my house. Most of the resources you’ll need to complete your jobs are in here and you’ll need quick access to them. The second reason is for your safety, from both the people after you and some of my members. I know you remember that you did kill quite a few of my men. Even if they were rats, nobody knew, and so they were treated like any other member. And we don’t take it too well when one of our own is killed. Once others start recognizing who you are, they’ll want to get back at you. Keeping you here will keep you safe from that as well as whoever the hell else you pissed off - no one would dare touch you while you’re under my wing, okay?”

“I understand, but I want to tell you ahead of time that should any other members attack me because we killed your rats, I will fight back and will not be held accountable for any damage on the other party’s side. You and I both know the truth behind those members' deaths and therefore any attack is unwarranted and me fighting back is self defense.”

I see the corner of his lips lift into the slightest smirk, amusement dancing in the dark pits staring at me.

“Depends on how much damage you cause.” He tells me.

I bite my lip to keep from smirking back, noticing the elder’s eyes dropping to watch the action.

“Not enough to kill anyone, enough to get my message across.” I explain.

“What message?”

“Don’t fuck with me.”

“Trust me, they’re too weak to.”

“Are you sure they’re your men? I was positive no man of Jeon’s was too weak for anything.”

“They may be my men, but they aren’t me. There’s a reason why I’m living in this house and they aren’t.”

I softly chuckle.  _ Confident, but not arrogant. _

“I’d imagine there would be a reason. So, what else do I have to know?” I ask.

“While you were asleep the others took a tour of the place. I’ll give you one as well once we’re done here. Afterwards, you and the rest of your team will complete a blood oath, swearing your allegiance and loyalty to me. Then you’ll get our insignia, I already have a few tattooists waiting on standby.”

_ A blood oath? That’s an interesting way of initiating us. _

“Your team’s first job starts tomorrow. Your unit, alongside me and another sub-unit, will make a plan to get rid of those three mafia’s whose leaders you recently killed. Understand?”

“Yes sir.”

His lips curl into a smirk, causing my stomach to twist.

“Good. Now, time for the tour.”


	7. 06

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The King of Hell is a fallen angel

_ Taehyung _

The tour didn’t take very long. Or maybe I was too busy thinking of how many cheeseballs I can stuff in my mouth to notice how much time had passed. Jeongguk saved our dorm area for last since we’ll be meeting up with the others once the tour is done.

“Namjoon said that you had a workshop at your old house for your projects. Would you like one here as well? There are plenty of rooms currently being unused that you can take.” Jeongguk tells me as we head to my new room.

“Really? That’d be great, honestly.”

“We’ll handle it tomorrow, sound good?”

“Yup.”

The rest of the walk back is quiet save for our echoing footsteps resonating across the rather long hallway. I tug on my face mask (having pulled it on when we left Jeongguk’s bedroom), toying with the black fabric out of boredom.

“It’s so quiet here.” I mumble, not liking the silence.

When it was just the rest of the Rose and I, there was never a dull moment.

“Mostly everybody else is preparing for the blood oath.” Jeongguk explains.

“Wait- there’s going to be an  _ audience _ ?”

“Did I forget to mention that? Yes, there will be an audience. Most, if not all, members will be there to witness the oath.”

“Well shit. Now I wish I had worn something more flashy. Gotta make an entrance, y’know? First impressions are everything.”

I hear the older snort. “Of course they do. But you do recall that almost everyone there will want your head, correct?”

“And you do recall that you’ve given me permission to whoop some ass if a hoe tries me, correct?”

“Why do I feel like that was a mistake?”

“It’s only a mistake if you regret it. Do you regret your decision already?”

“Why should I if you’ve done nothing to make me regret it?”

_ Boom boom. _

“People usually regret deals they make with me. I’m like a crossroad demon of sorts. People come to me to make their desires come true. All is fun and games until it’s time for me to collect the payment. Then they realize what, exactly, they got involved with.”

“Crossroad demon? Well, that doesn’t do you any justice, now does it? I would think the legendary Joker of the group that has been a pain in my ass for the past six months would have a higher rank in the depths of hell.”

I can’t help but laugh at his mock annoyance, actually having to stop because I can’t see from the tears building up. I also can’t help but feel my ego inflate just the  _ tiniest _ bit because  _ Jeon Jeongguk _ , King of the Cobras - currently the strongest mafia in all of South Korea - has recognized my strength.

“I did say I was a crossroad demon of sorts, didn’t I? Don’t you know that Lucifer is the king at making deals?” I question, flicking away the few tears that slipped before walking again.

“The King himself, huh?”

“Who else could’ve pulled off the things that I have? No angel, that’s for sure.”

“Perhaps not… But Lucifer was an angel once. He was the favorite.”

“He was also the one let down the most. Abandoned by a father that was meant to love him, hated by his brothers who were supposed to stand by him, forced into the world of the damned and stuck in the eternal role of the bad guy just because he had his own beliefs. Yes, Lucifer was an angel once, but that holiness became the reason why he is so feared. Never fear a monster who was born the way he was. Fear the man who was forced to become one, because he knows what exactly to do to make a person  _ hurt _ .”

No more words were spoken after that. Jeongguk had an impassive look on his face, but a storm brewing behind his black eyes. I can’t help but wonder what’s going on in that mind of his. He’s someone so easy to read, easy to predict, but somehow he keeps surprising me with every word - every action. He’s like an open book but in a different language. The man stops walking without warning and opens a door, holding it open for me to walk in.

“This is your room. Your hyungs took everything from your old room and put it in here.” Jeongguk tells me as I head inside.

The walls were completely white. In fact, almost everything in the room is white. The floor is made of dark brown, almost black, wood. A queen size bed sits against the wall The blankets and sheets are white with a lilac blanket, the one I fell asleep with last night, folded at the foot. The pillows are mostly white, but there are also some purple and gold ones as well. There’s a white, fluffy carpet that goes from halfway under the bed to the other side of the wall, and gold lamp posts hang on the wall on either side of the bed, lamp shades white.

There are two black dressers, one on either side of the lamps, gold mirrors hanging above them. Each dresser holds a white vase, purple hellebores idly sitting inside. A white armchair sits in the corner of the room next to the glass balcony door, lilac curtains creating a shield between the glass and I.

“Is everything to your liking?” Jeongguk asks.

“It is, but.......can I paint the walls?”

“Do whatever you please, it’s your room. If you’re done looking, you can leave your bag here and follow me. The sun is about to set which means it’s almost time for the oath.”

I set my bookbag down by the door and follow the black haired male, shutting my door behind me and watching as the elder knocks three times consecutively on five different doors - one on either side of mine and three across. The doors open as I tug my mask down and I come face to face with my family again.

“Taetae baby, you’re awake! How are you feeling, baby? Did you sleep okay? Are you hungry? Did you eat? Probably not. Hyung’s gonna cook for you after this, okay? How’s jajangmyeon sound?” Jin hyung’s rapid fire questioning doesn’t really surprise me as he does it every time we’re separated after one of my episodes or I leave without warning.

The elder squishes my cheeks as he looks at me worridley. I hold onto his wrists, trying to take his hands off so I can speak.

“Hyungie, I’m fine, I feel okay. I slept like a baby. I’m not really hungry right now but I will be later. And jajangmyeon sounds great.” I tell him.

“Aw, my baby is so cute and polite. Jajangmyeon it is, baby. Jeon told you everything that’s happening? Yes? Good, let’s go. Don’t forget to pull your mask on.”

“I know, hyungie.”

After putting my mask back on we start heading to wherever the hell the blood oath is taking place at, Jeongguk leading the way. I skip my way up beside him, hands in my pocket and eyes straight ahead.

“Yah, Taehyung, what’re you doing? Come here.” Jimin tells me.

I just turn around and make a funny face at him, laughing at his annoyed face. I laugh harder when Jimin lunges at me, attempting to get back at me for being a brat. My body moves on its own, easily evading my short hyung without having to think about it.

“That’s not very nice, hyungie. You should treat your dongsaeng with more respect.” I say teasingly, a smile to match though you can’t really see it.

“It’s the other way around, brat!”

I laugh cheekily as I dart away from the silver haired male and jump onto the back of my favorite hyung. Namjoon easily adjusts to the sudden weight, grabbing onto my legs and hiking me up further on his back. I stick my tongue out at Jimin, making a funny face and mockingly laughing as I know he can’t hurt me while I’m on Namjoon.

“Onward, noble steed!” I joke, pointing forward.

“As you wish, young prince.” Namjoon plays along.

The hall is filled with my laughter as I lean into Namjoon’s back, resting my head against the nape of his neck. Namjoon walks from his spot in the back with Yoongi and goes to the front, now alongside Jeongguk. I look at the dark haired male’s profile, not even noticing just how much I seem to be looking at the older since we’ve met. His black hair is long and silky looking, a few strands falling in front of his face though he doesn’t seem to care. His turtleneck covers most of his tattoos, but I can still remember the few I saw the night on the rooftop.

And his eyes, I can never bring myself to look away once they grab my attention. There’s just something so demanding about them, so dominant, yet at the same time so damn gentle. Those same eyes that turn to look at me now, enveloping me whole and stealing my breath but not drowning me.  _ Drowning would be heaven compared to this. _

“We’ll be exiting the house now. The ceremony will be held by the lake outback.” Jeongguk announces, his voice low yet powerful enough for everyone to hear him.

As soon as he’s done talking I slip off of Namjoon’s back, making at least some attempt at being serious. It’s a lot warmer outside here than what it normally was back at our lake house, but then again, there is no lake here. A little ways off in the distance I can see a large fire and quite the number of bodies (living, of course). There isn’t a platform or anything too large I can see, nothing else of important value to me, at least. Once we get close enough, all eyes are on us as we follow Jeongguk to the front of the audience. We reorder ourselves as we line up: King, Queen, Ace, Jack, Knight, Joker.

“Good evening, everyone. We’re gathered here today to initiate some new blood. As you know-” Jeongguk begins.

I am not ashamed to admit that I blocked him out after that.  _ Although _ , I  _ did _ stare  _ very _ intently at him to make it seem like I was listening. What can I say? His side profile is amazing, absolutely breathtaking. His  _ jawline _ is so damn sharp it could cut me and I’d say ‘thank you’. Though I’m sure that’s the masochist in me speaking. I watch as Namjoon steps up to Jeongguk and both males cut the palms of their hands, rosy red liquid seeping from the injury.

Namjoon repeats an oath after Jeongguk and then they shake hands, completing the blood oath. Jackson leads Namjoon away, and then Seokjin steps forward. One by one I watch as my family swears themselves to Jeongguk and his gang. It isn’t long until it’s my turn, the last one left. I smile largely beneath my mask, skipping forward to meet Jeongguk. I can just barely see the small smile on his lips as he gently takes my left hand.

“Do you, Kim Taehyung, solemnly swear your life to me and our cause?” He asks.

“I do.”

He cuts my hand. “Do you swear to remain faithful and honest with us; to respect, trust, and help us?”

“I do.”

He carefully holds my left hand in his, our blood mixing together as we shake hands.

“Welcome to the mafia, Taehyung.” Jeongguk tells me.

“Is there an after party later?” I joke.

“Not exactly, but I’ve got quite the collection in my office if you’re down later.”

“I’m all in, just don’t tell Jin hyung. He only lets me drink on the weekends and  _ after _ I’ve eaten dinner.”

Jeongguk chuckles. “You got it. Now let’s go get your tattoo, hm?”


	8. 07

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The tiger chases the rabbit

_Taehyung_

I follow Jeongguk to a gazebo-like place with glass for walls. Inside there are four tattoo artists and four seats, all currently occupied. There’s also who I think is a doctor on standby, probably to bandage our cuts. Jeongguk and I head inside, the older still holding my hand, but this time my left hand in his right.

“Soobin, over here.” He calls out.

The young doctor’s head perks up at the sound of his name. He grabs his medical kit and rushes over, giving me a smile so adorable I actually almost coo and pinch his cheeks. ....Okay so I lied. I actually did coo and pinch his cheeks.

“Oh my god you’re so cute~ What’s your name, sweetcheeks?” I ask, still pinching the doctor’s cheeks.

“S-Soobin. I’m here to bandage your hand, if you don’t mind.” Soobin answers.

“Of course, thank you.”

“No problem.”

I let go of Jeongguk’s hand and hold out my injured hand, palm up, for Soobin to treat. He starts by pouring a bit of water over the cut and wiping off the blood stained water mix, then smears a bit of antibiotic cream over the cut. Afterwards, he wraps a white bandage around my hand, snipping the end to separate the wrap from the roll and tapes it down.

“All done!” He tells me with a smile.

“Thank you!” I say with a laugh, chuckling as I wiggle my fingers and oogle the bandage.

I slip out of Soobin’s way, allowing him to tend to Jeongguk’s hand. As he does so, I scan the room, noticing that Namjoon hyung, Jin hyung, Yoongi hyung, and Hobi hyung are all getting their tattoos done while Jimin hyung sits in between Yoongi and Hobi hyung. I walk around the place a bit before sitting in front of one of the glass walls, turning to watching the forest out of boredom. My eyes lazily scope the dark abyss in front of me, subconsciously drowning out my surroundings and only focusing on the dark ahead and in my mind. Words and phrases echo in my head along with sinister chuckles that only I can hear.

_ Darkdarkdark- it’s dark, always dark, only darkness. Dark is home, home is dark. They’re in the dark, we’re in the dark, we  _ are _ the dark. Swallow the light, bask in the dark, bask in the pain, bask in the screams, bask in the unknown.  _ I aimlessly focus on a single point, barely catching the small, flicker of white light.  _ Someone’s in the dark, he’s in the dark, he’s using the dark. _ All at once the voices begin to shout, their voices overlapping and echoing - so far away yet so close.

_ They want to hurt us, hurt them, hurt us, hurt them. They want us, wanna kill us. Why us? Why again? Who do they want? Save them. Kill them. Save them. Kill them. End them. End them. End them! Perfect prey, perfect dolls, perfect them all. Their will is mine, their souls are mine, mine, mine.  _ A quiet, distorted chuckle leaves my lips, the hauntingly amusing sound carrying through the room louder than I thought. It wasn’t too loud, but enough to catch the attention of Namjoon and Jin who sit close by, both of them cautiously watching me.

_ Mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine mine. _

The white light flashes again, much brighter this time, and I find my body moving of its own accord. Everything moves in slow motion - the hyung’s eyes widening in shock as I stand up and run, the glass pane I was sitting in front of shattering like tiny diamonds, Jeongguk’s body falling to the ground as I just barely manage to tackle him to the ground, the bullet lodging itself in the wooden support beam that Jeongguk was just standing in front of.

“Taehyung- no!” I hear Namjoon yell after me as I get back up again, running out of the shattered wall and towards where I saw the white flash.

_ Kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them. _

My hands find their way up my shirt, clasping around the knives before pulling them out. The distance between the gazebo and the forest wasn’t far, and soon enough I find myself in the trees. I already know that the shooter has run by now, now that their assassination attempt has failed, but that just makes things even more fun.

“Come out, rabbit! Come out and play with me!” The words come out as a growl but with the tone of childish excitement to it.

I let my instincts guide me, having been through this situation so many times that I can practically predict my prey’s next move. My eyes pierce through the shadows as if they weren’t there, ears straining to hear and follow the rapid footsteps ahead of me. Lips stretched into a large smile beneath the mask, I speed up my pace, almost shouting in joy when I see the male running away in front of me, sniper strapped to his back. I don’t say anything or make any noise, wanting to sneak up on him.

_ So close, all mine, just mine. Gonna make him pay. Make him my little puppet, my little doll. Make him pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty pretty. _

Once I’m close enough, I jump forward and grasp onto the male, catching him off guard. I use his shock to my advantage, managing to flip the brown haired male onto his back while I straddle him.

“Gotcha!” I shout with a laugh.

I grab one of his arms, not caring that he’s struggling, and drive one of my knives into the palm of his hand and deep into the ground. My bones shudder in excitement as the other screams from the pain, the vocal cry causing a few birds to take flight. I impale his other hand as well, the cogs turning in my head at all the things I can do to him. A few, shiny tears grab my attention and I fake sympathy, one hand cupping the other’s face while the other stealthily moves down my right leg.

“Oh no no, don’t cry, little rabbit. We’re going to have fun, y’know! You need to smile!” I say, chuckling afterwards.

“G-get off of me, you monste-”

I laugh as the man screams, roughly holding his face in place as I cut his achille’s tendon.

“Can’t have you running away, can I, little rabbit?” I rhetorically ask, slowly cutting his other achille’s tendon.

I rip open his shirt, observing how his chest moves up and down rapidly, the moonlight making his sweaty skin shine and the few scars to shimmer against the pale skin.

“What should I do first?” I question myself.

I rest the side of my face against the flat of my knife, head tilted slightly and free arm across my chest. The sound of realization I make is almost comical, eyes widening and shimmering and lips going from wide open to a large smile. I let out a breathy chuckle, hands flying up into the air in my excitement.

“I know! I’ll rip out your intestines, and decorate your body with it, then carve out your heart, eyes, and brain, and send it to whichever shitty gang you came from! No! No! Even better, your family! Hahahahahahaha! Isn’t that great?! Oh! We’re going to have so much  _ fun _ ! Let’s start right away!” I squeal loudly, body shaking with enthusiasm.

Just as the silver of my knife comes in contact with the man’s stomach, the latter now sobbing uncontrollably and trying to get away from me with little success, a loud voice interrupts me.

“Taehyung.” I immediately pause what I’m doing, head whipping around to face the group of people.

However, my confusion quickly turns to glee when I realize who called my name.

“Ggukie! You’re here! Just in time for the fun! Come watch!” I exclaim before turning back to the squirming rabbit.

“Taehyung, stop.” A frown replaces my smile.

“No.” I state firmly.

“Excuse me?”

“I said no! I don’t wanna!” I scowl at the older male, pouting underneath my mask.

Jeongguk frowns deeply and takes long strides to reach me, kneeling in order to look me in the eyes. He grabs my arm holding the knife rather harshly, causing me to growl at him. His frown deepens, eyes hardening to a soulless black pit. A rough hand grabs me by my chin, cruelly holding me in place.

“ _ Don’t _ growl at me.” Jeongguk rasps, voice sending shivers down my spine, and not the good kind.

I growl again just to spite him, holding back a whimper when he jerks my face closer.

“ _ What _ did I just say?” He snarls out, glaring at me. “Listen closely to me, Taehyung, because the next time you disrespect me I won’t be so kind. I don’t give a fuck if you were allowed to do whatever the hell you wanted before, but now you listen to  _ me _ and  _ only _ me, got that? I could care less whatever the voices in your head say, you tell them to shut the fuck up and listen only to me, do I make myself clear?”

A low whine is my response as I pathetically try to pull away from his firm grip. Jeongguk squeezes harder, causing me to whimper, but he doesn’t let go.

“I asked you a question. Answer me.” He orders.

“Y-yes…” I ground out, gritting my teeth.

“Yes  _ what _ ?”

“Yes  _ sir _ .”

His face slowly softens after that, his hand releasing my face and gently caressing the place he gripped, carefully soothing the ache. I don’t remember leaning into his touch.

“Good boy.” He says tenderly.

Maybe I liked the praise.

“Now, I’m going to tell you what’s going to happen after this and you’re going to listen, aren’t you?” Jeongguk asks, still keeping that soft tone but with a sense of authority to it.

“Yes sir.” I answer, internally patting myself on the back once I see the small, yet short, smile on Jeongguk’s face.

“Yugyeom and his team are almost here now, and they’re going to bring this guy down to the cellars where he will be  _ questioned _ . You still have to get your tattoo and the others have to have theirs finished, so we will be going back to the gazebo. You will stay by my side the entire time, understood? Once that’s done, I will bring you back to your room where you will change out of those dirty clothes and into something more comfortable, pajamas, preferably. After you’ve changed you will go down to the kitchen and get something to eat because you haven’t eaten all day, and then you will go back to your room and head to bed. Did you get all of that?”

“Yes sir.”

“Repeat it back to me.”

“Rabbit will be taken to the cellars. We’ll go back to the gazebo to get our tattoos done, I’ll stay with you the whole time. Then I’ll change into pajamas, eat dinner, and go to sleep.”

“Good boy. Now knock him out, hm?”

I do as he says, my fist coming in contact with the assassin’s jaw and successfully knocking him out.

“Good job. Let’s go now, it’s getting cold.” Jeongguk tells me.

He helps me stand up, my free hand interlocking with his. I shuffle closer to the older as we walk, keeping my eyes to the ground and my mouth shut. I didn’t realize just how far into the forest we were until now, now that I’m calm and able to actually notice my surroundings. We come across Yugyeom and his team somewhere along the way, but I don’t really pay attention. Jeongguk said nothing about me having to interact with them.

I can hear the others talking behind us, discussing something, but I brush it off. They typically wait until a matter has been fully discussed and solved before telling me. It’s not something that’s bothered me, because usually that means I can do whatever I want and not worry about business. I don’t mind business, I’m rather ecstatic about it, but I don’t like the planning and researching part. I like the execution part, that’s the fun part. Back in the gazebo, everyone returns to what they were doing before the whole assassination attempt, acting as though it never happened.

I sit on a tabletop, Jeongguk leaning against it next to me, talking with Soobin. I mindlessly swing my legs, staring at my hands in my lap. I really want to get up and walk around, or do  _ something _ so I’m not so bored, but I can’t leave Jeongguk’s side.  _ Who cares about him? Just get up. You don’t need his permission to do anything. And besides, when has an order ever stopped you from doing what you want? _ My fingers curl tightly around the edge of the table, almost turning white.  _ Has Taehyung gone soft? Are you a pussy now? Gonna bow down and obey Jeon like an obedient puppy. He calls you “good boy” like you’re a fucking dog. _

Shut up, get out of my head. I’m tired of listening to you.  _ No you’re not. You love listening to me. I am you, you are me, we are one. Don’t go forgetting all of the good times we’ve had, darling, cause I can make you remember again. _ Forget? What’s that? I could never forget you, you always remind me.  _ I know. _ I close my eyes, mouth clamped shut as I quickly get a handle on myself. The sound of my large exhale grabs a few attentions, but I don’t really notice. All I notice is the cell phone being held in front of me when I open my eyes again, Octonauts on the screen.

“Netflix doesn’t have Bubble Guppies.” Is all Jeongguk says when I look up at him.

I look at him blankly before slowly smiling, taking the phone and pressing play. The lyrics to the intro are on the tip of my tongue, the words coming out as a murmur. I can feel myself relax, moving to find myself a more comfortable position. Somehow, please don’t ask how because I wouldn’t be able to tell you even if I wanted, I find myself straddling Jeongguk again. Both of my arms are wrapped around his shoulders, my nose slightly nuzzled into the junction where his shoulder meets his neck, and I hold the phone close to my face. The older eventually sits on the table so I can sit properly, hands making their way securely around my waist to keep me from falling.


	9. 08

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's loyal and obedient, but he'll tempt you into eating the forbidden apple.

_ Jeongguk _

Surprisingly, I  _ haven’t _ gotten annoyed by the obnoxious children’s cartoon theme song  _ yet _ . Even with the phone close to my ears, I don’t really focus on the sound coming from it. The memory of Taehyung pushing me to the ground and running out of the window replays over and over in my head. The unmistakable  _ innocence _ and  _ excitement _ in his green eyes when about to carve the man open was almost terrifying. But at the same time…

I couldn’t help but  _ want _ to watch him carve the man open.

There was just something so enticing about it, so  _ inviting _ , especially when Taehyung told me to watch. Taehyung with his wide, green eyes and large, box smile. Taehyung with his skillful hands and artistic eye. Taehyung with not just a few loose screws, but an entire collapsing structure that is his sanity. Taehyung who  _ sees _ more than everyone thinks,  _ knows _ more than meets the eye, and can  _ do _ more than what he lets on. Taehyung whose entire being is an enigma, one that I never realize I want to unravel.

Taehyung who  _ made _ me want to watch him carve a man open.

“Jeongguk.” Yugyeom stands before me, Eunae and Mark with him.

All three of them are eyeing the small male in my arms, confusion written across their faces, but say nothing.

“What did he say?” I ask, getting straight to the point.

“Nothing, he absolutely refuses to speak. We’ve tried a few things so far, but nothing seems to be working.” Yugyeom responds.

I frown, thinking back to when Taehyung had him pinned down. The assassin was sobbing like a child, trying so hard to get away from the green-eyed boy. He was scared shitless of the Joker. Without realizing, a smirk crosses my lips, a solution already in mind.

“Don’t worry about that for now. I’ll take care of it tomorrow after the meeting. Did you figure out how he found out about this place or how he knew when to attack?”

Yugyeom shakes his head. “That’s what’s confusing us. Mark, you tell him.”

“There were no identifying marks on the man, nothing that could tell us if he belongs to another mafia or not. We also had the nearby areas checked but found no mode of transportation or hideouts or anything. I don’t even know how he planned on escaping, much less how he knew about this place.” Mark explains.

“How the hell did you even make it out without a scratch? From what Soobin told me, you were right in his line of fire.” Eunae says.

“Taehyung.” Is all I answer with.

Said male lifts his head slight, puppy dog eyes peering up at me and plump lips slightly parted. I forgot he took off his mask when he climbed onto my lap.

“Huh?” He asks softly.

I shake my head. “Nothing, bub. Watch your show.”

He returns his attention to my phone, quietly following along with what’s happening. I look back up at the others.

“He pushed me out of the way right before the bullet could hit and then took off after the shooter.” I inform them.

“ _ He’s _ the one that pinned the guy down like that?” Yugyeom questions, eyes wide.

I nod.

“Wait, how’d he know the guy was after you?” Mark inquires.

My brows furrow as I frown slightly. “Good question. I don’t know.”

There’s a moment of silence before Eunae speaks up.

“Taehyung?” She calls out, and the younger answers with a hum. “How’d you know that the assassin was going after Jeongguk?”

Taehyung doesn’t immediately answer. Instead, he lightly adjusts himself, pressing himself closer to me, if possible, and I feel him bury his nose further into the crook of my neck.

“Anyone could figure it out. A young doctor, four tattoo artists, six unknown new mafia members, and the leader of the country’s biggest mafia are all in one room. Choosing which one to kill isn’t a difficult decision, especially if you only have one chance.” He calmly says.

_ Makes sense. _

“How did you even know there was someone out there?” Yugyeom asks.

“He wasn’t as slick as you guys think. Honestly, I don’t see why you’re making such a big deal out of this.” I can’t help but raise an eyebrow at the younger’s words.

“Excuse you? Our leader was almost killed right under our noses and-” Mark begins.

“Yeah,  _ almost _ . He’s not dead.”

“Do you seriously not care? He’s your leader now, too!”

“Which is exactly why he isn’t dead.” Taehyung pauses his show, placing the phone down before maneuvering himself around in order to face Mark and the others. “Jeongguk is my leader, it’s my duty to serve him and protect him for as long as I live. Whatever obstacle he may face, whatever enemy may come his way, I will dispose of them. I will never have to worry about anything bad happening to him because I know that I will be there alongside him, whether to protect him or fight for him.”

_ So loyal. So obedient. _ Taehyung gives the three, especially Mark, a sharp look before turning back around and resuming his earlier position.

“And if you  _ ever _ doubt me again, I suggest you take a look at what used to be of your three biggest enemies. Afterall, it was  _ me _ and me  _ alone _ who killed them  _ for _ Jeongguk.” He confesses, pressing play on his show.

Almost immediately I feel the younger relax in my hold, his body practically molding against mine.  _ The power of cartoons. _ I smile internally, laughing to myself, but keep a straight face when looking back at the others, all of them surprised by Taehyung’s words.

“Thank you, you’re dismissed.” I announce, snapping them out of their shock.

Yugyeom gives a slight nod before leading Mark and Eunae out. I sigh softly, closing eyes and resting my head on the glass behind me. Finally letting the events of today take their toll on me, I can’t wait to get back to my room and sleep, craving nothing more than a good night’s sleep. A sudden pressure on my shoulder blades has me cracking open my eyes, noticing Taehyung no longer watching the Octonauts but rather me.

“What are you doing?” I ask quietly, closing my eyes again.

“I usually give the hyungies a massage when they’re stressed or tired from work. You looked like you needed one, too.”

I relax beneath his touch, humming in satisfaction as he works out a particularly hard knot on my back.

“Thank you.” I murmur.

I feel him move around, eventually sliding off of my lap and wiggling his way behind me. His legs are on either side of me, my back barely touching his chest as he massages out all of the knots and built up tension in my back.

“You work too much.......just like Namjoon hyung.” I hear Taehyung say, probably not meaning for me to hear.

“What do you know about how much I work?” I question, not meaning for the words to come out as rough as they did but also not apologizing for it.

“I told you, didn’t I? I know a lot about you. I’ve known about you much longer than you’ve known about us, longer than the hyungs have known about you.”

I open my eyes, slowly turning to look at the blonde who seems rather unbothered.

“What, you’ve been stalking me?” I joke, though a part of me is serious.

Taehyung pauses for a moment, staring off to the side before nodding and continuing what he was doing.

“Yeah, you can call it that.” I chuckle at how straightforward and nonchalant he is, facing ahead again once Taehyung nudges me.

“Why?” I ask.

“It started out as a job, I had to gain intel on a few people who we were looking into allying with. The others absolutely disgusted me, to be honest, and I had to stop myself from playing a deadly game of cards with them. Not gonna lie, I didn’t have much faith in you before my mission. You surpassed my expectations, you’re different from the others.”

“Why did I stop being a job for you?”

For some reason, his chuckle gives me goosebumps, chills running down my back as he wraps his arms over my shoulder and rests his head on my shoulder, head tilted so that his lips graze against my neck.

“Caught that, huh? You stopped being a job to me for the same reason why I listen to you and why I like being around you so much. You, my little bunny, are just as insane as I am. The only difference between us is that you haven’t snapped yet. Don’t even try to lie to me, lies don’t work on me. You know it, too, you know you’re crazy like me. You just need to mute the little voice in your head you call a conscious for a while to see it.” His deep voice resounds in my ear, so soft yet so loud.

I feel his warm, soft lips land on my neck in a short, innocent peck. He gently guides my face towards his, his wide, emerald eyes taunting, teasing, almost daring me to refute him.

“I think it’s my turn to be tattooed. Join me?”

How could I possibly refuse him?


	10. 09

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Scars are like tattoos; permanently etched into your skin and each holding a different story.

_Jeongguk_

“Taehyung, go ahead and pick your design and where you want it. I’m going to talk with Namjoon for a second.” I tell Taehyung, noticing the older male gesturing me over.

Taehyung wanders over to one of the free tattooists and takes a seat, striking up a conversation with the worker. Meanwhile, I head over to Namjoon who talks silently with Yoongi. The taller has a bandage around his forearm, while Yoongi’s tattoo is on his shoulder. Both look up as I get closer and Namjoon gives me a small smile, Yoongi remains impassive.

“Everything okay?” I ask.

“We just wanted to talk a little about the attack earlier. Normally we’d be busy trying to eliminate the threat from its source right now while Taehyung has his fun, but I can already tell you do things differently.” Namjoon responds.

“No, not really, but the attack isn’t one of my top priorities right now. Seeing as it was only one person seemingly working alone, I don’t think it necessary to worry about it too much. For now I just want to get today’s plan finished and start preparing for the meeting tomorrow morning, after that we’ll handle the assassin.”

Namjoon nods apprehensively. “And another thing-”

“What did you do to Taehyung?” Yoongi interrupts.

I raise an eyebrow at the harshness of his tone, not liking it very much.

“Excuse me?” I ask.

Namjoon sighs. “Yoongi, I told you to let me speak.”

Yoongi shrugs. “What? I said the same thing you were going to say.”

“Yeah, but you said it so harshly.”

“No I didn’t. That’s how I always speak.”

The taller groans in annoyance. “Whatever. Jeongguk, what Yoongi meant to say was......okay so that’s what he meant to say,  _ but _ , y’know, more politely.”

I smile a bit in amusement, slightly wondering how they’ve been such a pain in my ass for so long when they’re so playful.

“What do you mean by what did I do to Taehyung?” I question.

“What did you do to make him calm? He would have butchered the assassin by now.” Namjoon responds.

I shrug. “I just told him to stop.”

Both men look at me with confusion written across their features.

“That’s it?” Yoongi asks.

I nod. “More or less. I also gave him a specific set of instructions to follow for the rest of the night.”

“And he  _ listened _ ?”

I turn to look at Taehyung, noticing the blonde twiddling with his fingers, shirt riding up his chest as a stencil is placed along the right side of his ribs. I internally coo at the small pout on his lips, smiling back when Taehyung notices me looking and gives me a big, boxy smile.

“Yes, he listened.” I tell Namjoon and Yoongi, looking at Taehyung for a moment longer before turning back around. “You sound surprised.”

“If you know Taehyung like we know him you would be surprised too. Well, that’s all we had to say. Yoongi, Jin and I will head back to the mansion, Hoseok is staying to bring Jimin and Taehyung back.” Is Namjoon’s reply.

“Sounds good to me. Don’t forget to prepare for tomorrow’s meeting. I want everyone in the map room at nine am sharp.”

“Trust me when I say it’s not us you should be worried about.”

“I’ve trusted you this far, haven’t I?”

Namjoon only gives me a half smile, one dimple imprinting on his cheek.

“Goodnight, Jeongguk. See you nine am sharp.” The older’s words follow him as he leaves, Yoongi and Seokjin at his sides.

I turn back around, slightly confused when I see only Taehyung sitting down while the tattoo artist prepares the ink.

“Where are Jimin and Hoseok?” I ask Taehyung, sitting down next to him.

“Jiminie only got a small tattoo on the back of his ear and it didn’t take long. I told him and Hobi hyung to go ahead and head back since mine is gonna take long and they’re tired.” He answers.

I nod before looking down at where his tattoo is to be placed. However something else catches my attention. Dozens or pearly dots and slashes and other marks marr his honey toned skin, marks that I surely would have seen the first time we met, yet I didn’t.

“Taehyung.” I call out, still staring at the marks while the tattoo artist brings the tattoo gun closer to the other’s ribs.

“Hmm?”

“Sorry to interrupt, but I’m going to start now. This is going to hurt, but try not to move.” The tattoo artist interjects.

“Ah, don’t worry, I won’t.” The younger one reassures.

The male nods and begins his work. Taehyung sits absolutely still as the needle touches his skin, not flinching even once.

“You’ve got a high pain tolerance.” I note, more or less to myself.

I hear Taehyung’s light chuckle and take a glance at his relaxed face.

“Please, you can see the scars. I’ve had worse than a tattoo done to me.” He says.

“You covered them. How and why?” I question.

“Not gonna ask how you knew I covered them, but okay. I used makeup to cover ‘em. As for the why, I had to cover them for a job the day we met and never took it off till after the meeting.”

“You must’ve gone through some shit.”

He chuckles. “I dunno, I thought it was pretty fun, for the most part.”

“Masochist.” I tease.

“As if you don’t enjoy a little pain as well.” He retorts. “I bet you’re secretly a sadist.”

“I guess you’ll never know.”

“Please,  _ everyone _ who’s friends with me is at least a little sadistic.”

“Who says we’re friends?”

“It’s a part of the Kim Taehyung package.”

I laugh a little, grinning slightly at the green eyed boy.

“Let’s play a game.” Taehyung suddenly says.

“What kind of game?”

“You pick a scar and I’ll tell you how I got it and how old I was.”

“What kind of game is that?”

“One that’ll pass the time. C’mon, I’m bored. Entertain me.”

“It’s more like you entertaining me.”

“Jeongguk~”

I chuckle again. “Alright, alright, I’ll play along.”

I scan his body, looking at all of the scars before randomly choosing a small, thin scar on the left side of his hip.

“This one.” I say.

“Bar fight, I was ten.”

“How the fuck did you get in a bar at ten?”

“I’m small and sneaky, a bar is one of the easiest places for me to get into.”

“Did you start the fight?”

“I threw the first punch but the other guy instigated it. He tried to hit on me, I said fuck off, he persisted, I punched him in the face.”

“Did you win?”

“Course I did. I mean, I got  _ banned _ from the bar for life, but I beat the guy.”

“How many bars are you banned from?”

“Sixteen and counting!”

“Taehyung.......that’s not something to be proud of.”

“Says you.  _ You’re _ just upsetti spaghetti cause  _ you’re _ not banned from any bars.”

“That’s because I  _ own _ the bars. And the clubs.”

“Rich boy.”

“Fuck off.”

Taehyung laughs. “Fine. Pick another scar.”

I choose one on the left side of his ribs, the scar about two to three inches long and a few centimeters wide. Something cut the shit out of him.

“Ah, that one has a bit of a background. I was on a mission, needed intel for this small group that did some shit I can’t remember. So I fucked one of the members girlfriend and got her to spill all the beans. Gave Joon the info, got myself purposely caught and they beat me around some. The one guy got pissed when he found out I fucked his girl, it was hilarious. Anyways, I got stabbed, the guys came, we killed some bastards, and that scar is the proof.” Taehyung explains. “I waaasss....fifteen!”

“Fifteen? Wait, I thought that you’re gay?”

“I am, but I know how to be straight for a job. Usually I don’t go as far as sex, but I was on a time crunch with limited resources and Jimin had another, important, job so we couldn’t switch. I scrubbed myself religiously in hot water and soap for a few hours every day. I’m trying so hard not to cringe just thinking about it.”

“Must’ve been traumatising for you.”

“Fuck off, bisexual emo bitch.”

“How’d you- nevermind. That was uncalled for.”

“But one hundred percent wanted.”

“Says who?”

“Me bitch.”

“You get real comfortable real quick.”

“You’ve just noticed? Now pick another one.”

The game continues for a while, a few hours as we both keep going off topic, and I realize that Taehyung is, in fact, an actual masochist, among many other things.

“Okay, last one.” I say, ghosting my fingers over the obvious old stab wound right on top of Taehyung’s heart.

“17 years old, December 30th, an unfinished fight with the Shadowman. Don’t ask me about him.”

There was a noticeable shift in Taehyung’s behaviour even before I chose the scar. His usually wide, bright eyes turn downcast and dull, he gnaws harshly onto his lower lip, he clenches his left pant leg tightly in his fist. I’d’ve thought he was in pain from the tattoo but he was completely unresponsive to the pain before so I doubt that’s the reason for his change.

“What’s your favorite color?” I ask.

The younger blinks a few times, slightly taken off guard by the question.

“Purple.”

“Mine is red. Favorite show?”

“Is this 21 questions?”

“Answer~”

He smiles slightly, his hair partly falling in front of his face as he shakes his head. “I like a lot of shows, cartoons mostly. Absolutely nothing horror related.”

“I don’t watch t.v.”

“So an old, rich emo bitch?” His teasing makes me smile internally.

“Fuck off.”

A soft laugh escapes him before he glances first at the nearly finished tattoo, then out the windows.

“But it was funny.” I hear him say quietly.

“If it makes you smile.”

A comfortable silence envelops us save for the buzzing of the tattoo gun. I watch as Taehyung’s eyes slowly begin to flutter open and closed in drowsiness, making me both silently chuckle and wonder just how much he can sleep. The rest of the time passes with Taehyung sleeping peacefully, his nose scrunching up slightly from time to time but otherwise the very slow and steady rise and fall of his chest is the only movement he makes, and me silently watching. Once the tattoo is finished and bandaged I attempt to wake Taehyung up, only to get a small growl, a hand to the face, and a whine that sounds like “no”.

Giving up on trying to awake him, I instead carry him back to the mansion. I take him up to his room and, after much coaxing, cringe-worthy baby talk, whining, and slaps and punches, I get him to change into pajamas and into bed.  _ How the fuck is that child a psychopathic mass murderer? _ If I was confused before meeting Taehyung, only knowing him as one of the members of a rogue gang, it compares nothing to the confusion I feel now.  _ It was easier to understand him without knowing who he really was. _


	11. 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Breakfast with the Rose is never dull

_Jeongguk_

“Why are you dragging me out of bed at six in the morning?” I half growl, half slur as a cause of my sleep being rudely interrupted by my sister dragging me out of bed.

“Because those heathens of yours are destroying the kitchen!” Eunae shouts back.

“I- what?”

Eunae just pulls me along harder, though I barely catch the sound of shouting and dishes clashing due to my tiredness. It isn’t until I stand in the opening to the kitchen and see actual _pots_ _and_ _pans flying_ that I sigh deeply and question my recent choices. I only count four of the six members, but even without the two it’s complete chaos. It looks like a scene out of Alice in Wonderland in here.

“What the actual fuck is going on?” I ask, mostly to myself.

“Welcome to the daily life of the Kim Family.” Someone says behind me.

I turn to see a still bored looking Min Yoongi carrying a....ball of fluff? Oh, wait, no, that’s Taehyung. The younger is drowning in a fluffy, dark brown sweatshirt with the hood pulled over his head, cute, little bear ears adorning the top. His legs are wrapped around Yoongi’s waist and his face is buried deeply in his chest.

“Kim Family? Aren’t there only three Kims in your group, though?” Eunae questions.

“Yeah, but we’re still a family. Our maiden name’s for business, but at home we all go by the same last name. Hence, the Kim Family.” explains the white haired male.

“Well your  _ family _ is fucking up the kitchen!”

“Nah, they’re just making breakfast. I’m gonna get some coffee, hold Taehyung.”

The bundle of brown fluff is thrusted so suddenly into my arms that I nearly drop him. Keyword: nearly. Once Taehyung latches onto something, it’s impossible to get him off. Even if I fumbled him, he would’ve held on too tightly to fall. I carefully readjust him comfortably in my arms, noticing that he also has on white, knee high stockings.

“Mmpff.......noishy, noishy, noishy.” I hear him mumble tiredly, slightly shaking his head before nuzzling his face into the crook of my neck.

“Eunae, s’there a fight or sumthin’ goin’ o- the fuck is this?” A half awake Jackson stumbles to where we are, shock and confusion on his face.

“Don’t ask.” Eunae deadpans.

A rather loud crash makes Taehyung whine loudly and wiggle in my arms.

“Noishy, noishy, noishy.......make it stahp.” He slurs.

“Namjoon don’t you fucking touch that pan or so help me God I will make you regret ever being born! Park Jimin stop eating all the fucking jam and Hoseok I will castrate you if you attempt to break dance in my kitchen one more time! And for fucks sake Yoongi stop drinking all the coffee!” Jin shouts, only getting more shouts and pots and pans thrown around.

A wild Yoongi comes walking out of the chaos, a mug of coffee in one hand and several knives in the other.

“He still asleep?” He asks, nodding his head at Taehyung.

“Uhm-” I begin unsurely.

“Make ‘em stahp or I’ll do it mysewf.” Taehyung suddenly growls out, though his eyes are still shut.

“Oh, good, he’s ‘bout to wake up. I suggest you take a seat.”

“Why?” Eunae questions.

“‘Cause he’s boutta make ‘em calm the fuck down. Ever wonder why our old kitchen had so many holes in the wall?” Taehyung begins to stir once more, causing Yoongi to come closer. “Taetae, breakfast time bubba.”

The blonde lifts his head, green eyes barely open and lips set in a deep pout. He tiredly rubs his eyes, looking at me for a few moments before the mess in front of us and scrunching his nose.

“Noishy, noishy, noishy.” He repeats the word like a mantra.

Even as he slides out of my arms and takes the knives from Yoongi he says the word again and again and again. I give Yoongi a questioning look but he only shrugs and sips his coffee, walking a good distance away from the kitchen. I hear the  _ thumps _ rather than seeing what happens, but when I turn around I understand. Each of the other four members of the Kim Family stand completely still, a knife in the wall just a hair away from their heads.

“Stahp bein’ sho noishy.” Taehyung grumbles before turning back around and walking back to me, holding his arms up. “Upsies.”

“Upsies?”

“Upsies, Jeon. Pick him up. Tae, love, I got your breakfast ready, let me just get you some juice.” Jin says rushing to the fridge.

“Taetae, I’ll give you upsies. C’mere, I feel like I haven’t seen you in hours.” Hoseok says, totally dismissing the fact he almost got a knife to the head.

“No, you noishy. Wan’ Ggukie.”

“Ggukie?” Jimin asks, a spoonful of strawberry jam halfway to his mouth and a chef’s knife eerily close to his face. “The fuck is a ‘Ggukie’?”

Without missing a beat, Taehyung points to me with a firm “Ggukie”. Jackson snorts and Eunae laughs.

“Cute nickname,  _ Ggukie _ .” Jackson taunts.

“Fuck off.” I snap back, picking up Taehyung after he whines for “upsies” again.

“Hey, he probably has nicknames for all of you.” Namjoon tells us, putting down a frying pan.

“Taehyungie, come eat baby. Jeon, set him down.” Jin says, bringing over a plate full of chocolate chip pancakes topped with strawberries, whipped cream, and syrup with a side of bacon and eggs to the dining table, a glass of apple juice in his free hand.

“I can’t. He doesn’t let go.” I respond as I readjust Taehyung’s head into a more comfortable position.

“He’s in the clingy stage already? Huh....” Jimin trails off.

“The what stage?”

Before he can answer, Jin is pushing me towards the dining table and making me sit down.

“Feed him.” He tells me, handing me a fork and sliding Taehyung’s food in my direction.

“The fuck do I look like? A caregiver? He can eat himself.” I snap, now getting annoyed with the entire chaotic situation.

I attempt to pry Taehyung off of me, growing more and more frustrated when I fail to pull him off. I have no idea how the hell his grip is so strong or how to get him off, but at this point I’m willing to do anything to get him off.

“Dude-” Jimin begins.

“Don’t call me ‘dude’.” I interrupt.

“Jeon, he isn’t going to be letting go anytime soon. Honestly, the more you struggle the tighter he’ll hold on.”

I huff angrily, pausing my actions before glaring at the silver haired male. “How do I get him off?”

“ _ You _ don’t.” Yoongi answers out of nowhere. I honestly almost forgot about him, he’s so quiet. “He’ll get off himself. Just wake him up. Well, wake him up  _ fully _ .”

I sigh again, frowning as I look down at the sleeping boy in my lap.

“Why does he even cling to me?” I ask more to myself than anyone else.

“That’s how he makes friends. It’s a process, really.” Namjoon answers.

I raise an eyebrow, lifting my head to watch the other male sit down across from me with a coffee cup cradled in his hands.

“A process? You mean there’s more than this?” I question.

“No, this is the last stage. Look, Taehyung categorizes people into three categories; friends and family, casualties, and enemies. He more or less treats enemies and casualties the same, he sees them as objects - things he can “play” with. Really, that’s how he sees just about anyone other than us, his family. In order for someone to become a family member or friend, in his eyes, they have to go through this process Tae made ever since before he and I met.” He explains.

“First stage is stalking.” Hoseok says, sitting next to me with his breakfast. “He’ll stalk a person to decide whether or not they’re even worth his time. This can take anywhere from a few weeks to a few months.”

_ Taehyung did say he’d been stalking me for over a year. _

“Next he’ll introduce himself to you. He’ll talk to you a lot, usually about random things, just to get an idea of how your dynamics work together.” Jimin continues, also sitting down, but next to Namjoon. “That usually takes up to either a few days or a week.”

_ Or in my case, a few hours. _

“And finally, the clinging.” Jin wraps up. “Taehyungie is a naturally touchy person but it’s usually reserved for friends and family. Hence, this stage isn’t to see if you’re  _ okay _ with it, but to get you  _ used _ to it. Once you are, he’ll dial it down to what he’s usually like. So really, the less you struggle, the better. Most of us got used to it pretty quick, so we don’t know how long this will last.”

“So he’s ‘making friends’?” I ask.

“Yup.” Yoongi pops the “p” and I have to do a quick double take, having not noticed him taking a seat.

I also have to see where Eunae and Jackson have gone to, realizing that the two loudest people I know have suddenly gone quiet.  _ Of course. They disappeared. _ I internally roll my eyes before looking back at the others, noticing that they’ve already started up a new conversation and are happily enjoying their breakfast.  _ And of course they leave me to wake up Taehyung. _ I think I’m starting to regret my decisions. But still, in the far back of my head is a quiet voice, one I silence way too often, that disagrees with that thought. In fact, it thinks that this is the best decision I’ve ever made.

“You’re spacing.” The deep, honey sweet and velvety smooth voice catches me off guard for a moment.

My gaze travels downwards and once again I find myself marveling at Taehyung’s visuals. His wide, green eyes are bright and glass-like and stare so intently at me, his somehow cute nose with the little mole scrunches slightly from time to time as the others raise their voices while they talk. His full, rosy lips that appear impossibly soft are slightly parted (and maybe I can even feel the warmth of his breath on my chest) and his sun kissed skin looks so smooth and soft that it reminds me of a doll. Golden locks fall gently in front of his unwavering gaze. I don’t remember pushing them out of the way.

“How long have you been awake?” I ask quietly, subconsciously not wanting to break the quiet, calming bubble around us.

The younger shrugs slightly, attempting to move away but (maybe, just maybe) I hold him in place.

“Woke up earlier ‘cause of the noise, but I fell asleep again when you picked me up.” His last few words are drawn out as he lets out a big yawn, nose scrunching up again as he does so. “‘S noisy again ‘n I know I won’t be able to sleep again for a while.”

I nod. “Jin made breakfast for you. Turn around.”

I loosen my grip enough for him to turn and face the table. I can’t see his face, so I can only imagine the look on his face while he stares at his food.

“Taehyung...?” I call out.

“Hmm?”

“Are you not going to eat?”

“I can’t eat all of this. Hyungie probably forgot I don’t have much of an appetite when I wake up.”

“But you didn’t eat at all yesterday. You need the food.”

“I know but....”

“Just eat as much as you can.”

“Have you eaten?”

“Huh? Oh, no, I haven’t.”

“Then share with me.”

“Uhm-”

“C’mon~ I can’t eat all of it and I don’t wanna waste food and you haven’t eaten so it’s a win-win- _ win _ situation. That’s three wins! Three birds with one gun!”

I furrow my brows. “Don’t you mean one stone?”

It’s Taehyung’s turn to look confused. “No, why would you hit a bird with a stone? You shoot it with a gun.”

My mouth opens and closes a few times as I attempt to come up with a response, but absolutely nothing comes to mind.

“You know what? Eat your breakfast. And yes, I’ll share with you.” I finally say, too tired to deal with his chaotic evil behavior.

A wide smile befalls Taehyung’s features as he lets out a soft giggle and picks up the fork. The next few minutes are full of Taehyung feeding both himself and I, neither of us saying anything unless you count Taehyung humming a random tune while he swings his legs up and down.

“I need to get ready.” I randomly say as Taehyung finishes off the last strawberry, looking at the clock on the stove.

“Huh? For what?” Taehyung asks.

“For the meeting at nine.”

“Oh right. Have fun, and tell the hyungies I said so, too.”

I frown slightly. “What do you mean? You’re coming as well.”

He looks at me with a mixture of shock and confusion.

“I am?” He questions.

“Of course. You’re a part of one of the main subunits that will be involved in whatever plan we come up with, you have to be there.”

“Oh.......the hyungs usually don’t let me help with the planning.”

That has me reeling a bit. The strongest member of their team and they don’t let him help with their plans? He might as well be a pawn.  _ Not on my watch. He’s an extremely valuable asset. I plan on exploiting his abilities to their fullest. _

“Well, from now on you’re going to be helping. Actually, I want you to spend the next hour or so coming up with three ideas as to how we can get rid of those three other mafias whose leaders you already killed. When the meeting comes you’ll pitch what you think your best plan is, okay?” I tell him.

He nods. “Yes sir.”

And maybe I smiled a bit.

“Good boy.”


	12. 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He doesn't do business, but he's more than capable of handling it

_ Taehyung _

"Sooooo.......where are we going?" I ask, skipping alongside Jeongguk as we leave the kitchen.

" _I'm_ going to get dressed."

"So, your room then? Cool. I like your room. I don't really like the color scheme, but I like the bed. Your sheets are really soft and comfy and smell good."

"Should I ask?"

"Hm?"

"Nevermind."

I stop skipping, changing my pace to long strides. One foot in front of the other, walking in a straight line with my arms out in a t-pose. I look down at my feet, watching as the wooden floor passes beneath me. Or am I passing above above the floor? _You're walking, that's it. Now shut up._

"So, what are these meetings like?" I question, lightly swinging my head from side to side as I become amused with how my hair swishes in front of my face.

"Depends on what we're discussing. Sometimes they're quick and easy, sometimes they can take up to a few hours. It really varies."

"Who's all gonna be there?"

"Well, us, obviously. Eunae, the rest of Got7-"

"Oh! You mean I'll finally get to meet Youngjae, JB, and Jinyoung?"

Jeongguk turns to look at me, brows furrowed in confusion before relaxing.

"Right, forgot about the stalking." I hear him mutter, making me laugh a bit. "Yes, you'll get to meet them. There will also be some other high ranking members there that aren't a part of any sub units, they'll be introduced at the meeting."

"What else?"

"I think it'll be better for you to experience it first hand rather than answer your questions. You seem like the type to do better with witnessing and experimenting rather than all of this business talk."

I can't help but grin a little, maneuvering myself to walk backwards while facing Jeongguk.

"What makes you say that?" I ask with an amused tone.

"Your marionettes." He simply answers, giving a bit of a playful smirk himself. "You could see the differences between them if you looked close enough. They were steadily improving with experimentation and practice. Plus you tuned yourself out of the meeting a few days ago. You may have known the outcome, but you still could have listened in. I assume you didn't because business talks bore you, maybe also a reason why you haven't attended a meeting like this before."

"Well," I drop my arms, locking them behind my back. "You're right, I hate business talk, but I'm fine with it if I really have to. I can't really say that's why the hyungs don't let me join meetings, it might be but I dunno."

Jeongguk nods slightly before grabbing my arm and pulling me to his side. My eyes widen in surprise, not having expected the sudden movement, but I quickly recover once I realize Jeongguk only did it so that he could bring me into his room. I immediately flop onto the messy bed, curling into a ball in the spot that looks most recently used. After tugging the blankets up to my neck, I grab one of the pillows and cuddle it, loving the scent coming from it. It's a scent that's unique to Jeongguk, something akin to cinnamon mixed with some sort of outdoorsy smell. I can't exactly put my finger on it, but I love it.

"Make yourself comfortable." Jeongguk says sarcastically.

"I have." I respond, voice slightly muffled as my face is buried in the pillow.

"Don't fall asleep, you still have a job to do. I'm going to take a shower."

"M'kay."

I listen to Jeongguk's footsteps as he goes into the bathroom, door clicking shut behind him. A few moments later and I hear the water turn on to which I sit back up, still clutching the pillow close to my body. I sigh softly, trying to focus on the sound of the water and not the voices in my head.

_Why do we need a plan? Just go in there and kill them all._

_We can't just do that, there are too many risks. We could get hurt-_

_So what? It's not as if it matters. We get hurt all of the time._

_We could die. Others could die-_

_And why should we care? We kill people all the time-_

_People we care about-_

_We don't care about anyone. Never have, never will. This is just an obsession, an infatuation. They're all just toys, dolls to play with. Once we get bored, we'll move on._

_I don't want to move on._

_That's why you don't make decisions. I do._

Just get rid of them all. Make a scene, make it big and bold, let everyone see it. Let them know that we did it, let them know that we'll do it without care and to anyone who gets in our way. Just kill them all.

The bubbling in my stomach is from anticipation, excitement, and I can't help the eager smile from stretching across my face. A few chuckles escape me before I bury my face into the pillow, letting out a loud squeal. The scent of Jeongguk from the pillow soothes me and I just sit, smiling like an idiot into the pillow.

"Gonna be so much fun, gonna make 'em all so pretty pretty pretty. Gonna play a game 'n everyone will play. Will Ggukie play? Hope he does, wanna play with him too." I mutter into the pillow, slightly in a daze.

I imagine all of the things I can do, how much fun I can have, what games I can play. The hyungs usually sit back and let me have all my fun when we do exterminations, so I hope this time won't be much different. Except maybe I can get some of them and Jeongguk to play with me too. I want to play chess, no I wanna play whack-a-human, or what about hide and seek? I'll just play them all!

"You look excited."

I blink a few times, wondering if I heard a voice in real life or in my head. But when I see the shirtless raven haired male making his way to the dresser, the low hanging towel loosely around his waist and drops of water falling down his pale, inked skin, I realize there's no way in hell my mind could've fabricated it.

"I am." I tell the elder, watching as he pulls on a pair of underwear and black jeans that hug his thighs oh so nicely.

"Why?"

"I finished my plans and came up with fun games I want to play."

"What kind of games?"

"Fun ones! Will you play with me?"

"Maybe."

Jeongguk dries off his back and chest before putting on a fitted black t-shirt.

"Please do. The other hyungs don't play with me and it gets boring by myself." I say, unconsciously pouting.

"I'll think about it for now, okay?"

"Okay."

"Good, now let's go."

"Upsies?"

"You can walk."

"But I want upsies."

"Not to the meeting. Another time."

I pout, huffing slightly but nonetheless stand up and follow Jeongguk to the map room. The map room is exactly what it sounds like- an all black room with a large, black marble table in the middle; a map of Seoul embedded into it. There's already a good amount of people there; most of my family, Eunae, all of the Got7 members I met, and two men I haven't met before. I waddle behind Jeongguk, holding onto the back of his shirt so he doesn't get too far from me. I would go to Namjoonie hyung, but he's already gone completely business mode. All of them have, and them in business mode plus me being me doesn't mix very well.

I tend to get bored and distracted easily which doesn't bode very well in serious situations. Maybe that's another reason why I don't attend meetings like these. I probably shouldn't be so close to Jeongguk either, but he's already proven to deal with me better than the hyungs regarding work. I mostly hide behind Jeongguk as he stands in the front of the room, directly in front of the map, and fiddle with the back of his shirt. A few people come and greet him, two of them being the ones I haven't met. When they say hi to me I merely look at them before hiding more behind Jeongguk's back, finding a strange comfort in the older. I don't know what it is about him that makes me want to stand beside him so much.

I know it's not just because he has the capability of being my level of crazy because if it were I'd want to battle him to the death to see who's the craziest. Whatever it is, I like it. It's calming, reassuring, comforting in a way. When the rest of the attendees finally arrive Jeongguk starts the meeting. I do my best to pay attention, but like I said, I get bored and distracted when it comes to business. I clutch tightly onto the back of Jeongguk's shirt and let my head fall onto his shoulder, closing my eyes and focusing on the vibrations of the raven's voice as he talks.

I carefully tune into the conversation, mostly just waiting for Jeongguk to finally start asking about ideas on how to proceed with the other mafias so I can pitch my idea. I nearly squeal when he finally says "does anyone have any ideas?" Almost immediately ideas are thrown out left and right, and soon enough everyone is arguing about how one plan is "stupid" and "no, that won't work". I watch with wide eyes and an open mouth at the chaos that ensues, quite glad that I haven't joined meetings like these before if this is what it's like. While everyone is still fighting, I take the chance to tug on Jeongguk's shirt to gain his attention.

"Ggukie?" I call out.

Said male turns around to face me, our chests practically touching at the close proximity. One of his arms wraps loosely around my waist, keeping me in place. _As if I planned on moving away._

"Hmm?" He hums, dark eyes trained solely on me, focusing completely on me and not the havoc behind him.

"Can I tell you my idea now?" I ask.

"Of course."

I gnaw softly on my lower lip for a moment, staring as I toy mindlessly with the sleeves of my hoodie.

"What if- what if we just kill them all, y'know?" I can tell he's about to object, but I quickly continue before he can. "I mean make it like a show, a macabre, make everyone scared of us. We- we can take the weaker two of the three and kill them all at once. Make it quick and easy, but also let it be known that it was us who did it. Then, we don't go straight after the last group. Instead we get them scared, psych 'em out in a way that we don't directly threaten them but they know we're after them. Wait until they get the most frightened and nervous, then we attack in the most brutal way possible and leave our mark as a message for anyone else who tries to mess with us. 'Anyone who opposes us will suffer the same fate'."

There's a moment of silence between us in which I still look at my hands before finally lifting my gaze. Jeongguk has this strange look in his eyes, one I can't quite read, as he looks at me. A few more minutes of a strange silence passes before Jeongguk gives me a small smile.

"That's a brilliant plan. Good job, Taehyung." He finally says.

I smile shyly, not used to the praise, and mumble a "thank you". Jeongguk turns back around and I go back to holding onto his shirt, slightly peeking over his shoulder.

"Everyone listen up!" He shouts and immediately everyone stops talking, looking intently at their leader. "Taehyung gave a brilliant idea, one that we'll be using so listen carefully to what I say."

Perhaps, my favorite part of the meeting was watching Jeongguk give orders. The absoluteness in his voice, his commanding aura, everything about him was something I have never seen before. Not even Namjoon hyung can compare to the power he holds, and Namjoon is one of the most powerful men I know. But maybe that's because I know that Namjoon hyung has a soft spot, Jeongguk, on the other hand, he's so far from everyone even though he's constantly surrounded by people. _Not even his sister seems to be close to him._

"Meeting adjourned." Jeongguk announces a little while later.

People mutter either to themselves or to each other as they leave. I, at long last, let go of Jeongguk's shirt as he turns to look at me once again.

"So, what'd you think of your first meeting?" He questions, leaning against the table.

"It was different from what I expected. A little unruly when it got to the coming up with the plan part. Pretty boring, too."

Jeongguk chuckles a bit. "Yeah, they are boring, but very much necessary. Now, I have another job for you."

I look at him with curious eyes, lips unknowingly setting into a pout.

"What is it?" I ask.

"I need you to interrogate someone for me."

"Who?"

"The assassin from last night."


	13. 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's play a little game~

_ Taehyung _

The squeal I let out catches the attention of the rest of the people in the room. Jumping up and down, I can’t help but clap my hands in excitement.

“Really?! I get to play with the rabbit again?! Can I do whatever I want?!” I rapidly fire out questions.

“As long as you get him to talk without killing him, you can do whatever you’d like.” Jeongguk answers, and I don’t miss the small smile on his lips.

I squeal again, jumping onto Jeongguk and hugging him without much thought.

“I can definitely do that! Thank you, Jeongguk!” I exclaim.

“Why are you thanking me?” He asks with a tint of amusement in his voice, hands firmly holding my waist.

“Because I didn’t think you’d let me finish having my fun with him. And it’s also been ages since I’ve done an interrogation. I can’t wait to do it again!”

“Well then, we should get started right away, shouldn’t we?”

My eyes gleam with excitement as I nod enthusiastically.

“Definitely!”

Jeongguk and I leave the map room, my hand clasped tightly in his as I hop alongside his long strides.

“How do you normally handle interrogations?” Jeongguk asks as we head down the main staircase.

“I p-p-play a g-game!” My fingers itch at the thought of a specific game, the excitement I feel noticeable through my stutter and the bounce in my steps.

“What kind of game?”

“It’s a really f-f-fun one! E-even Y-Yoongi plays it s-s-sometimes!”

“How do you play?”

“It’s- it’s- it’s- it’s- it’s- it’s- it’s- it’s-”

“Whoa, calm down a bit, Tae.” (I won’t admit that my heart skipped a beat when he called me by a nickname).

I let out a chuckle, slightly embarrassed by my stutter. I take a moment to take a deep breath and calm down before smiling at the taller.

“Sorry, I stutter when I get excited. Joonie says it’s cause my mind is moving faster than I can speak so my words get all jumbled and choppy.” I explain, laughing lightly.

Jeongguk shakes his head, a ghost of a smile on his lips. His eyes shine like black diamonds as he looks at me, amusement dancing in the orbs alongside something else I don’t quite understand.

“It’s okay, I don’t mind. It’s a nice change, I think, to see so much excitement here instead of stone faces.”

“But you are stone faced.”

“Shh.”

I laugh loudly, not missing the half smile Jeongguk gives me.

“Now, tell me what this game is about.” He says once I’ve stopped laughing.

“It’s a counting game!” I exclaim.

“A counting game?”

“Yeah! It’s super easy! But I don’t wanna spoil it so you’ll just have to watch, okay?”

“Okay.”

We continue to march on, me swinging our hands dramatically between us. The cellar is where all of the prisoners are kept, the door to said place being hidden behind a bookcase in the basement. When we get to the bookcase, Jeongguk lets go of my hand in order to move some books around, revealing a keypad. He types in a code and there’s a clicking sound followed by the bookcase slightly moving forward. I watch as Jeongguk pulls back the bookcase like a door, revealing a small, square room with a trapdoor embedded in the floor. We both walk inside, Jeongguk closing the door behind us before opening the trapdoor and gesturing for me to walk down.

I bound down the old, wooden stairs that I think are going to break and give bright smiles to the men standing guard by the stairs, ignoring their weird gazes. I wait for Jeongguk to come down, taking a look around as I do. The cellar is very dark and cold, gas-lit light bulbs occasionally bringing light when they aren’t flickering. I can hear the moans and groans of people in pain and pleas for help coming from the dark abyss and can’t help but wonder just what torturing and punishment methods they use. A moment later and Jeongguk is beside me, giving me a strange look before he shakes his head lightly, as if he were disagreeing with something in his head.

“What’s wrong?” I ask him, head slightly tilting to the side.

“Nothing. For some reason I thought you’d be uncomfortable down here, then I remembered who you are.”

I chuckle a bit in amusement, a part of me trying to figure out if Jeongguk thinks I’m so normal as to be bothered by people being tortured in a cellar hidden beneath the basement.

“Gguk, I’ve done things that would make this place seem like a resort. It doesn’t bother me. The only thing I’d say that makes me uncomfortable is how unkempt it is.  _ I _ prefer to have my fun someplace neater, but I don’t mind this all that much.” I tell the black haired male.

“That’s good, I get the feeling you’ll be down here a lot.”

“Just to pick up prisoners, no way am I making my workshop here.”

“Fair enough.”

Jeongguk walks up to one of the guards, towering over the male. I can’t help but stifle a laugh at the obvious difference in many areas.

“Take us to the assassin.” Jeongguk orders.

The guard merely nods and starts walking off into the dark maze. I walk beside Jeongguk, eyes wide in wonder as I take in my surroundings (my hand possibly in Jeongguk’s, but even if it is it’s an accident- a habit almost, as I tend to hold hands with my family when walking in places that interest me. It keeps me from walking off and getting lost). The prisoners are locked away in freezing, concrete cells with nothing inside and chains attached to their ankles and connecting to the wall. Their faces are, for the most part, bruised and bloody, and their clothes, if they have any, are thin and torn.

In short, they’re in better condition than the prisoners I used to keep. At least, for now.

“What’s his status?” I hear Jeongguk ask, and I assume he’s referring to the rabbit.

“He passed out around half an hour ago from the beatings. Still refuses to speak.” The guard answers.

“Not for long.” Jeongguk mutters.

Some time later and we finally come to the rabbit’s cage. The male is strung up by the wrists, silver chains digging into the pale skin. Every inch of skin is covered in a harlequin of reds, blues, purples, browns, yellows, and greens and his breathing comes out as harsh and ragged. The guard pulls out a set of keys, taking a minute to find the right one. The lock opens with a semi-loud  _ chink _ and the guard gestures for us to walk in. Jeongguk goes in first, I stay behind to ask for the keys to the rabbit’s chains.

“Can I have the key to his chains?” I ask.

The man gives me an unsure look, probably about to deny my request when Jeongguk speaks up.

“It’s fine. Give it to him.”

After gaining the key I slip it into the big pocket of my hoodie and follow Jeongguk inside the cell. With a giddy smile and a bounce in my step, I quickly pad my way to Jeongguk and push him to stand behind the dead looking man, trying to silence my giggles. Hopping my way in front of the rabbit, I bring up my hand and - as hard as I can - strike him across the face before taking a few steps back and pretending I did nothing. I crouch down and wrap my arms around my bent knees as I watch the male wake up with a start. He looks around confusedly for a moment before seeing me, flinching slightly, and frowning a bit in confusion.

“Who the hell are you?” His voice is scratchy, raspy.

“Hyungie says not to tell my name to strangers.” I keep my voice at a higher pitch than normal. “But hyungie also said not to come down here. Do you know my hyungie? You must if you’re down here. Hyungie says all of the meanies come down here so they can’t be mean anymore.”

“Kid, wha-”

“Hyungie is the best ever. He always gives me cuddles and carries me and teaches me really cool things. He’s really strong too. The strongest! He’s the leader, y’know? He can do everything! He’s multi- multi- multi- multi-talented! I forgot the word for a minute, hehe. But hyungie’s the sweetest and really understa-”

“Wait a seco-”

“-nding and lets me watch cartoons all the time. He lets me do whatever I want and plays games with me an-”

“Jeon Jeongguk!” The man shouts, cutting me off. “Is that your hyung?”

I sit for a moment, staring at the other with a blank look. In a flash, I jump to my feet with a bright smile on my lips.

“Yes, that’s my hyungie! I knew you knew hi-”

“Your hyung’s a monster- a tyrant.”

My smile drops and my eyes widen, head tilting to the side in mock confusion. “Huh?”

“Jeon Jeongguk is an evil man who tears families apart, kills innocent people, steals money and so much more. Your hyung isn’t as ‘sweet’ as you think he is. Do you even know what he’s the leader of? He’s the leader of a mafia, one that will kill you if your views don’t align with theirs.”

There’s a minute of silence before I step up to the ragged looking man, a mischievous smile threatening to show.

“Do you know why I like people like you?” I ask before dropping my voice back to its normal octave. “Because it’s  _ so _ easy to get you to talk.”

The terror and recognition in his eyes has me laughing, slightly throwing my head back.

“Y-y-y-y-you-” He stutters.

“Me!” I shout with a laugh.

I pull out the key to his chains, quickly undoing one.

“Let’s play a game!” I exclaim, pressing onto a rather nasty looking cut when the rabbit begins to squirm. “Let’s see how many bones I can break before you decide to tell us what we want!”

I unchain his second arm, holding them tightly to keep him from moving.

“The highest score is ten!” I announce.

I let go of his left arm and hold his right forearm firmly behind his back before twisting it even further and harder, smiling in content when I hear the satisfying  _ snap _ of his arm breaking,

“One!” I yell over the screams.

I pull his arm out, outstretching it completely before slamming my arm onto the spot where his forearm and upper arm meet, snapping his arm in half.

“Two!”

I raise my foot and kick the side of his knee, breaking it and causing him to kneel.

“Three!”

I let go of his right arm and grab his left, quickly breaking it.

“Four!”

“S- s- st- stop! I b-beg of y-you! I-I-I’ll tell you w-whate-ever you w-want! St-stop!” Rabbit finally yells.

“Awe,” I fake pout. “but I was just about to break your wrist. Oh well. Ggukie, he’s ready to talk.”

Jeongguk, for the first time, moves from where he stood. He walks up to me, smiling softly as he reaches out to ruffle my hair.

“Wonderful job, J.” He tells me.

I just smile brightly at him, knowing that he abbreviated my alias; Joker. Jeongguk’s entire demeanor changes quickly, however, when he steps in front of the man who quietly cries as he kneels painfully on the ground.

“Who do you work for?” The sheer forcefulness and coldness in his voice sends shivers down my spine.

I can’t help but stare in awe as Jeongguk easily and quickly went from soft and kind to powerful and terrifying.

“I’m a freelance assassin.” The man answers.

“Who hired you to kill me?”

“He used the abbreviation S.I.O, I don’t know his real name. He paid in cash, we met in crowded places, never called.”

“How did you manage to get onto the grounds?”

“The man who hired me told me how. There’s a hole on the southeast side of the wall that I crawled through.”

Jeongguk nods thoughtfully, staring the man down as he thinks, I assume.

“Thank you, but you’re no longer needed. J, do whatever you want.” Jeongguk gives me free reign, causing my smile to somehow widen and the assassin to choke on a sob.

"I'm gonna skin you alive, little rabbit." I say right before knocking him out.

I let his limp body fall to the ground.

"But first, I need my workshop."

"We can get your things now if you'd like." Jeongguk offers.

"Can we?"

"I did say that, didn't I?"

I giggle, nodding slightly.

"Then that's what we'll do. But change first, you're not going out in your pajamas." Jeongguk says.

"Okay!"


	14. 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Excited baby and 21 questions Pt II

_ Jeongguk _

I watch in amusement as Taehyung excitedly dashes out of the cell, not failing to flash the guard a smile. I calmly follow after him, telling the guard to chain the assassin back up on my way out. I listen to Taehyung’s giggles as he hops up the stairs like a bunny, throwing open the hatch and waiting for me to climb up as well.

“How do you have so much energy?” I ask once I make it to Taehyung.

I close the trapdoor as I wait for Taehyung to answer.

“Jin hyung says I stole it all from Yoongi hyung.” I chuckle at his answer while I move to open the door.

“Sounds about right.” I mutter, letting the younger pass by me.

Taehyung runs off again, but stops and runs back when he sees that I’m still walking.

“C’mon, Ggukie~ Walk faster~” He whines tugging on my arm.

“What’s the rush?” I question with a laugh.

“I- uh- I- um- uh- well- you see- the thing is- there isn’t a reason. But move faster~ You’re so slow!”

“I can and will move slower if you keep rushing me.”

Taehyung just whines louder and steps to stand behind me, palms flat on my back as he attempts to push me forward. I stand my ground, smirking as Taehyung lets out frustrated noises. After a few moments, Taehyung moves his arms onto my shoulders and hops onto my back, taking me by surprise. I stumble forward a bit, quickly moving to grab the younger’s legs. Taehyung lets out a loud laugh, wrapping his arms around my neck and resting his head against mine.

“You have a cute smile, Ggu.” He says quietly in my ear.

“Huh?” I ask, looking at him.

“You’re smiling. And it only took, what, three meetings? You have such a pretty smile, like a bunny.” I didn’t even notice I smiled.  _ When’s the last time I ever smiled? _

“I do not.” I retort, frowning.

“Yes you do. Don’t argue with me. Now let’s gooooooooo. I need to change.”

I snort, mumbling a “whatever”, but start walking nonetheless. Taehyung’s soft chuckles are the only sound I hear as I carry him up to his room, surprisingly not running into anyone. I unceremoniously drop Taehyung onto his bed, the blonde squealing and laughing as he bounces on the mattress.

“Hurry and change.” I tell him, closing the door and taking a seat on the armchair in the corner.

“Okie!”

Taehyung jumps onto the floor and, without warning, takes off his sweatshirt. My eyes automatically trail down the expanse of his smooth, honey skin, taking in the pearly scars once more. I look even lower and feel my face heating up at the sight of the white, lace underwear hugging Taehyung’s big ass and thick thighs oh so well. I force myself to look away, shutting off my thoughts before they can get out of control.

“What the fuck, Taehyung?” I question, covering my eyes with a hand.

“What? I’m just in my underwear. It’s not like I’m naked.” The other says nonchalantly.

“It’s still inappropriate.”

“Oh come on, you big baby.”

There’s a moment of silence in which I’m hoping Taehyung is leaving to get dressed. But to my misfortune, as I’m about to uncover my eyes, I feel a weight drop onto my lap and arms pull my hands from my eyes and onto bare skin before wrapping around my neck. I look up into Taehyung’s green orbs, mischief dancing across the irises.

“You’re my friend now, right?” Taehyung randomly asks, throwing me off.

“What?”

“You’re my friend, right?”

“I- I suppose?”

“You don’t sound too sure. But I’ll take it as a yes, anyway. Now, seeing as you are my friend, I feel more than comfortable changing around you, so I can and will do it. Trust me, you’ll get used to it. Yoongi hyung and Hobi hyung were weirded out at first too but now they’re comfortable with it.”

With that, he hops off my lap and turns towards the dresser, jumping on one leg as he tries to get off his socks. Because of this, he ends up tripping and falling face forward on the ground with a small, quiet “owie”. I get up and make my way to his side, a small frown etched onto my face.

“Are you okay, Tae?” I ask, not noticing the nickname slipped out.

I carefully lift him by the waist, watching as he rubs his nose before sneezing very, very,  _ very _ loudly and dramatically.

“Bless......you…” I manage to say, surprised at how loud his sneeze was.

“Thank you.”

“Are you okay? Can you stand up?”

“Yeah. My ankle hurts a bit, but ‘m fine.”

“You sure?”

“Mmm.”

I stand up first, then help Taehyung to his feet. Before he can move again, I pick him up and sit him on the bed before kneeling down and taking off his socks.

“And you called  _ me _ a big baby.” I mumble, shaking my head.

“Hey! ‘M not a baby!” I look up to see Taehyung pouting and can’t help but chuckle.

“You, little one, are the babiest of babies.”

Taehyung’s pout deepens as he lets out a whine. I stand up, smiling slightly, and flick his lips.

“Point proven. Now get dressed.”

I sit back down in the chair, watching as Taehyung moves about. A few minutes later and he’s dressed in a white, graphic t-shirt underneath black overall shorts that fit his form maybe a little too well. He ties on a pair of black Converse highs and finishes the look off with a pair of circular, black rimmed glasses.

“Ready?” I ask after he’s finished brushing his hair.

“Not yet, need one last thing.”

He pulls out a black case from beneath his bed, inside being many different types of knives, guns, holsters, and sheathes. I see him grab two harnesses which he attaches to each thigh, then slips on a sheathe on the harness. He places two knives into the sheathes and afterwards puts the case back, then turns to me with a big smile.

“Ready!”

“Let’s go then.”

Taehyung skips next to me and, after we let Jimin know we’re going out (“I have to let at  _ least _ one of my hyungies know I’m going out.”), we get into a large SUV and navigate our way to Taehyung’s old house. The entire ride consists of Taehyung blasting music playing on the radio and singing along (and yes, he was singing very well), sometimes even doing a little dance to go along with the music. Did I sing along? No. Did I smile? Maybe. Did I like listening to Taehyung sing? Definitely. Will I ever tell anyone about this? Absolutely not. As soon as we park in front of Taehyung’s old house, we’re greeted by over a dozen boxes - both big and small. I turn the truck off, and both Taehyung and I get out.

“Okay! Let’s diviiiiide and conquer!” Taehyung exclaims in a singsong voice.

That turned out to be me carrying all of the heavier items and Taehyung taking the lighter ones (“I’m just helping you stay in shape, y’know? Put those muscles to good use, hehe!”). It, surprisingly, didn’t take long and we were back on our way to the mansion a little over an hour later (and yes, it did consist of Taehyung singing even more).

“Soooooo........where do I set up?” asks Taehyung as we walk inside.

We don’t carry any boxes, instead I send some lower level workers to bring them inside.

“There’s a medium sized room near the basement you can use.” I answer, directing him towards said room.

The younger walks with a spring in his step, and I still have to wonder where all of his excitement comes from. The room I’ve brought us too is large enough for whatever Taehyung might have planned, almost the size of a classroom, and has bare, white walls.

“Do you have paint?” Taehyung randomly inquires.

“Uhm, I think there are a few buckets laying in the basement.”

“What colors?”

“Uhm, some white, black, green, red-”

“Okay!”

“Don’t cut me off.”

“Okay…”

“Good boy. Now, I’ll have someone get your paint and the boxes directed here. You sit and wait, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Good. What colors do you want?”

“Red and black, please.”

I nod and pull out my phone, sending out orders via text. When I told the smaller to sit, I didn’t mean for him to  _ actually _ sit, it was a figure of speech. Yet Taehyung still plops down in the middle of the room, legs crossed and a whistle on his lips. I can’t help but bite back a smile, sending one last text before sitting down across the younger.

“Let’s play a game!” Taehyung exclaims, clapping his hands together excitedly.

“What game?” I inquire, amused by the blonde’s antics.

“Ummm.” He places his finger on his chin, thinking, before breaking out in a bright smile. “21 questions!”

I chuckle lightly.

“Okay, I’ll bite. Let’s play. You go first.” I say.

“Ummm, favorite animal?”

“Dog. Yours?”

“Tiger! Favorite movie?”

“I don’t watch movies. What happens in your head when you spike?”

He looks slightly taken aback by that question, a range of emotions swirling in his eyes. Perplexion is written across his features as he takes a minute to respond.

“I......It’s dark......and scary… It’s like I’m living in a nightmare, or a night terror, ‘n it drags on forever and ever and ever until, for a small, split second, everything is clear. I have like this moment of clarity where everything makes sense and the demons shut up for a while and I’m able to take control of myself long enough to get back home and let the others calm me down. Weird thing is, I can’t ever remember  _ exactly _ what happens in that headspace, but I remember what I feel.” He explains slowly, eyebrows furrowing slightly from time to time. “How’d you get into this life?”

_ Demons? Why does he refer to them as that? _

“Family business. I took over after my dad died. How old were you when you got your first tattoo?”

“Uhm, thirteen. It was my rose tattoo. What’s your sexuality and have you ever been in a relationship? I know I called you bi yesterday but I was guessing cause I’ve never seen you  _ once _ shown sexual or romantic attraction to anyone, I’m curious.”

I can’t help but laugh a bit.  _ Of course he’d ask something like this. And I’ll never get over the fact he stalked me for a year. _

“I’m bi, and yes I’ve been in a relationship before.” I answer.

Taehyung lets out a big, dramatic gasp at that, leaning forward onto his hands and knees.

“Really? Who’d you date? Boy or girl? How long ago was it? Did you like them? Why’d you break up-”

“Woah woah woah, slow down there. You already asked your question, wait your turn.”

“But  _ Jeongguk _ ~ I wanna know~” Was his whining cute? Yes. Were his puppy dog eyes cute? The cutest. Was his pout cute? Fucking adorable. But did I give in?

“I dated Yugyeom, back when we were fifteen. We dated for three years but split up because we lost feelings, plus I needed to focus more on my work. Did I like him? Back when we first started dating I think I did, but whatever I felt was gone quickly.”

“Whoa.....I can’t believe it.”

“You’ll come to soon enough. Now it’s my turn. Earlier......you called the voices demons but......they aren’t all demons, are they?”

“Oh?” The younger raises an eyebrow in interest. “What makes you say that?”

“It’s mostly a gut feeling, really. Sometimes I see you staring off but you make these very small, almost unnoticeable facial gestures and your eyes have these interesting look in them, it kind of seems to me like you’re having a war inside your head. One that you have often and know how to hide from others.”

“Well then, fun fact, you’re right. No one really gets it but not  _ all _ of them are so bad. I mean, yeah they’re fucking crazy, but it’s a harmless kinda thing for the most part. So, I categorize them into two parts: demons and protectors. Demons want to kill people and destroy things, protectors want to keep ourself and family safe, even if the way in doing it is bad. The demons also like to hurt me, they take over when I spike. My turn. How’d you come up with the system for the mafia? Like, the subunits and different ranked members and stuff?”

“Subunits are for accessibility, convenience, you have a specific set of people for a specific job - makes everything so much quicker and easier. As for the members ranks, they’re ranked based on loyalty and efficiency.”

“Oh, that makes sense, I guess.”

“Mmm. My turn, favorite food?”

“Um, don’t know. I like a lot of foods. How’d your dad die?”

“Collection of health problems plus old age. Actual c.o.d, according to the autopsy, was an aneurysm. Favorite weapon?”

“Knives, definitely. But I want a huge mallet like Harley Quinn! Except, you know, customized to my taste hehe. Uhm, I know you always drink a cup of coffee every morning and at around eleven at night, how do you like your coffee?”

My brows furrow slightly. “Really? That’s what you wanna know?”

“Yes, now answer.” The younger cutely growls at me, making me hide a smirk.

“Black, no cream or sugar BUT-” I say the last word loudly once I see Taehyung about to make a snarky comment, “I usually have something sweet on the side. Who’s got the most kills out of everyone in your group?”

“Oh, me, definitely. Favorite place to visit?”

“There’s a small lake nearby I go to when I need to think. Best shooter?”

“Hobi hyung. Yoongi hyung’s a close second, though. Favorite tattoo?”

“An angel on my right shoulder blade. How did ‘The Rose’ come to be?”

“Started as payback, then freedom, and for right now, survival.”

“Payback?”

Taehyung leans back lethargically, leaning back on his arms and letting his head fall back.

“For man made monsters, our demons were physical once, and now take root in our very beings.” He drawls out.

I make moves to respond, but just as I do there’s a knock on the door and boxes are being moved in.

“Time to decorate, I guess.” I mumble, watching boxes be set down.


	15. 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's a literal child

_Jeongguk_

“Oooh, yay! Let’s paint first!” Taehyung says giddily.

I’ve barely seen the extent of Taehyung’s duality yet I don’t think I’ll ever get used to how quickly he changes his demeanor.

“This is going to take hours.” I groan, standing up.

“Then we better get started quickly, right?” Taehyung responds through a giggle.

I let out a silent sigh but nod anyways, wondering just how and why I’m in this situation.  _ I have other things to do that take priority over this. I should just have someone else help him or have him do it himself. _ A soft “whoopsie”, however, makes me change my mind when I turn around to see Tae crouching down next to an open paint can - red paint somehow smeared on his face already.  _ A child. He’s a literal child. There’s no way I can leave him on his own. _

“How did you get paint on your face?” I ask, bringing over paint brushes and more paint cans.

“It got on my hand when I opened the can but I didn’t know and went to push my hair back and boom- I got paint on my face.”

I shake my head lightly, smiling a bit.

“How do you wanna do this?” I question, opening a can of black paint.

“Three black walls and one red.” Taehyung answers, picking up a paint brush.

I nod and get to painting, Taehyung doing the same. It’s quiet except for Taehyung’s humming and the squishing of the paint on the spongy paint rollers. It takes us hours to get the whole room painted, and yes we do spill some of it here and there on the floor (“It’s okay, the floor will get dirty one way or another. As long as we don’t step in it!”). Five minutes later Taehyung steps in the paint, getting black footprints across the floor.

He just cutely chuckles, nose scrunching up as he smiles, and keeps painting, more red paint smeared on his face somehow. After painting, I get someone to bring down large fans to dry the paint while Taehyung and I go back to Tae’s room so the younger can wash his face and change his shoes. Tae drags me to the kitchen after that and makes us both lunch (sandwiches and chips). Somehow, we end up debating about which is the better chicken nugget sauce - barbeque or honey mustard.

“I swear to God, Jeon, if you try to tell me that barbeque is better than honey mustard sauce I’ll fucking boil your kneecaps!”

“Oh no, fuck you, Kim, barbeque is better, you little shit!”

“That’s it! Gimme them fucking knees!”

“Come get them yourself with your short ass!”

“Excuse you, my ass is thick and juicy, you muscle bitch!”

“Call me a bitch again and you’ll see what happens!”

“What, you gonna punish me,  _ sir _ ?”

My eyes darken and I place my palms flat on the table, smirking devilishly at the blonde.

“You’d like that, wouldn’t you? To be punished like the masochistic baby you are?” I taunt.

My smirk widens when I see a bright blush coating Taehyung’s cheeks and the younger is quick to throw a balled up paper towel at me.

“Fuck off, Jeon.” He grumbles.

“Oh so I’m ‘Jeon’ now? Weren’t you just calling me ‘Ggukie’ this morning?” I continue to tease.

“I’ll fuckin turn your bones to pottery you reprehensible fuck waffle!”

“That doesn’t even make sense, the fuck?!”

“Uhm.......what’s going on in here?”

Both Taehyung and I look over to see Hoseok, Jimin, Mark, and Jackson in the doorway to the kitchen, watching us with confused looks.

“This spam email over here tried to tell me that barbeque is the better chicken nugget sauce when honey mustard is clearly superior!” Taehyung shouts as an answer.

You can imagine the chaos that was created. Jackson and Hoseok were on Taehyung’s side, Mark and Jimin on mine as we all argue back and forth. It isn’t until, perhaps, an hour later when Jin, Yoongi, and Yugyeom walk in that we finally stop, not without being threatened a few (many) times. At that time, Taehyung and I head back to his workshop and start unpacking boxes, Taehyung playfully throwing insults and threats at me here and there. All of it stops, however, when he finds his record player and albums. He puts on a vinyl by someone named Lewis Capaldi and sings along, his deep voice mixing harmoniously with the music.

Sometimes I just stop and stare, unable to believe how beautiful his voice is and too hypnotised to think straight. Because of this, it takes me a bit longer to unpack things and put them where Tae wanted them. It’s late into the evening, probably long past midnight, by the time we complete everything. Tae was practically asleep in my arms, having put the last knife on a shelf before coming over and wiggling his way between my arms, wrapping his own around my waist and resting his face against my chest.

“Tired?” I ask quietly, reaching up a hand to brush through his locks.

I use my free hand to finish unloading a set of new surgical instruments into a custom cabinet. Taehyung lets out a low groan in which I assume he’s saying ‘yes’ and tightens his hold on me, making me unconsciously smile.

“I just finished. Do you want to eat something real quick or go straight to bed?” I question, now bringing my free hand to rest on Taehyung’s waist.

“Bed.” He tiredly drawls.

My lips curl into a soft smile as I look at how small and at peace Taehyung looks holding onto me. I grab him by the hips and pick him up, the latter’s legs going around my waist and arms draping around my shoulders as he buries his face in the crook of my neck. I carry him out of the room, switching off the (now) red lights. The halls are dark and quiet, Taehyung’s soft breath’s are the only thing I hear. Once inside Tae’s room, I lay the younger on top of his blankets (he immediately curls himself into a ball) and crouch on the floor next to him, running my fingers through his hair.

“Tae, wake up, bun.” I say softly, not noticing the pet name that slipped out.

Taehyung grumbles, shaking his head slightly with a quiet “don’ wanna”.

“You need to change into pajamas, bun, and brush your teeth. After that you can sleep. Can you do that for me? Can you do that for Ggukie?”

Slowly, Taehyung opens his eyes and looks at me, pout settled on his lips. He looks at me for a moment before nodding a bit, reaching out his arms to me. I pick him up again and carry him to the bathroom, turning on the lights before setting Tae on the counter. I find his toothbrush and toothpaste, getting it together before handing it to Taehyung who sleepily takes it. Ruffling his hair for a second, I leave and go to find his pajamas. It takes me a bit to find them, having gone through several wrong drawers before finding something suitable for him to wear to sleep.

I pull out a large, fuzzy pink hoodie with a white hood and bunny ears. Nodding to myself, I close the drawer and go back to Taehyung who’s practically asleep, toothbrush nearly falling from his mouth. I quietly chuckle at his state and set the hoodie on his lap, pulling his toothbrush away and rinsing it out. Tae wakes up slightly from the action and looks at me with glazed over eyes, seeing me but not at the same time. I grab a cup and fill it with water, handing it to Taehyung with the soft order to “rinse”. Once he has, I unclasp the buckles of his overalls, the metal clanking against the sink, and pull his shirt off.

I quickly put his bunny hoodie on and slide him off of the counter, dropping to my knees to tug off his overalls under the dress-like hoodie. Tae holds out his arms to me once I stand up and I pick him up, already knowing what he wants. I shut the lights off and place Taehyung back in bed, pulling the covers over his body.

“Night night, Ggukie.” Tae says, voice heavy with sleep.

“Night, Tae.” I respond, running my hand through his hair one last time before leaving, not realizing a soft smile was on my face the whole way back to my room.

I quickly change into sleepwear, falling asleep almost as soon as my head hits the pillows. I wake up too early, in my opinion, but once I’m up I’m up for good. I get ready for the day, dressing myself in a navy button up shirt, a matching pinstripe tie, a charcoal grey vest, black pants and matching dress shoes. After parting my hair in its usual parted style I grab my phone and head down to breakfast, finding the same chaos as yesterday. Only this time Taehyung isn’t there to stop it.

“He was exhausted when I went to wake him up, threatened to stab me in my shins if I didn’t leave him alone. I think everyone will agree with me when I say a tired Tae is not a happy Tae, and you want him happy at all times.” Jimin explained when I asked where he was.

Breakfast, even without Tae, was an interesting affair. But then again, there’s never a dull moment with the Rose around, I don’t need to know them that long to figure it out. After breakfast I go to my office, dealing with the work I put off yesterday in order to help Taehyung put together his workshop. My mind works on autopilot, having done this work so much that it doesn’t take much effort anymore, just time. I make phone calls to senior level members, giving them orders to go ahead and start making tabs on the three mafias we’ll be attacking soon. After that I call up everyone from yesterday’s meeting, telling them to meet me in my office in an hour to discuss the finer details of the mission.

“Oh, Jeongguk, Tae doesn’t have his phone on him, you’ll have to go down to his workshop to let him know.” Jin tells me as I’m about to hang up.

“Can’t you tell him yourself?” I question, pinching the bridge of my nose.

“No, none of us go in there unless absolutely necessary.”

“Why?”

“You’ve seen what he has down there, haven’t you? His tools, I mean. Now imagine just what he can do with those with a body placed before him. We love Taehyung to death, but we can’t stomach some of the things he does.”

I sigh, dropping my hand and leaning back in my chair. I know Taehyung does unspeakable things, I’ve seen the aftermath of it. But if even his family themselves won’t even go into his workshop unless necessary it gives me a rather large red flag.

“Alright, I’ll go get him, just make sure the others are in my office in an hour, okay?” I say.

“You got it, see you in an hour.”

I hang up after that, letting out another sigh before shutting off my laptop and standing up, heading down to Taehyung’s workshop. The first thing I notice upon reaching the door is music playing, classical music, I think. Something about the music and the possibilities of what Tae may be doing down there sends a shiver down my spine, the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. I take hold of the doorknob, knocking twice before opening the door. The room is painted a deep red, the source being several red light bulbs in the middle of the ceiling. The combination of the red lights and music increases the eerie atmosphere, but also sends a rush of excitement through me.

My eyes fall onto Taehyung, the younger already looking at me with his wide, dark eyes. He’s no longer in the bunny hoodie but rather a dark (black, I think. It’s hard to distinguish colors in this light), oversized t-shirt that slips off his shoulder. He straddles a man’s body, the assassin I presume, a knife in hand. His hands are stained in a liquid, probably blood, and it even coats parts of his face. From what I can tell, the body has been severely mutilated and I know it’s all from the blonde haired boy sitting atop the body. A sudden smile graces Taehyung’s face, a sweet giggle escaping his lips.

“Hi Ggukie!” He exclaims.

The corner of my lip twitches upwards slightly.

“Hey Tae.” I respond.

“You came to visit me, I didn’t think you’d do that.” Tae says, you can practically hear the smile in his voice.

I frown slightly, giving him a bit of an apologetic look.

“Sorry, but not this time. I came for business.” I tell him, making my way to him. “We’ve got another meeting in an hour and you need to be there. Let’s get you cleaned up, yeah?”

“Okay.”

I take the bloody knife from his hand, setting it on a nearby table, then help Taehyung down. He takes my hand in his and together we leave the workshop, heading up to Tae’s room. The younger washes his hands, arms, legs, and face then patiently waits while I wash my hands as well. He stays in his black shirt, the fabric somehow escaping being dirtied by blood, and shorts (“I have to get back to my workshop after the meeting. I have to finish everything and pack it up before it starts to smell”). The walk to my office is surprisingly quiet, Tae skipping alongside me with our hands intertwined.

Though I’d never admit it outloud, I wanted to hear Tae talking about some sort of nonsense as we walked. I like listening to him speak so fervently about random things, I like how energetic and happy he is all the time, I like how touchy and cuddly he gets. I like his random personality changes, even if I barely understand them. There’s just something so different about him, I can’t help but fancy these things about him. So when we get to my office and Tae lets out a big gasp, looking around the, in my opinion, simple room in wonder, I don’t even think about hiding my smile.

“Your office is so cool!” He commends, turning to smile brightly at me.

“It’s not much, but I’m glad you like it.” I reply.

I take a seat behind my desk and gesture for Taehyung to sit in front of me, but to my surprise he plops down on my lap, back to my chest. I merely shake my head in amusement, placing one hand on Tae’s waist and the other on his thigh.

“Wow, it’s been ages since I’ve seen work like this.” Tae says, looking at some papers I already went through.

“You know what all of this is?” I ask.

He nods. “I used to do things like this, before the Rose became official and when it was just Joonie and I. Honestly, it wasn’t until about two years ago that I stopped doing paperwork.”

“You did paperwork but didn’t attend meetings?”

Tae laughs. “Yeah, weird, right? Paperwork is probably the only thing business I can do, in a weird sense.”

“I get it, I think. Why’d you stop?”

He shrugs. “Joonie decided to ‘take away some of the strain’ on me or something like that. I don’t really know what he means by that since I know I actually could’ve done a lot more than what I was doing, but I don’t argue with him. I know he just wants what’s best for me.”

“You two are super close.”

“Of course, he’s my dad.”

“Really?”

“Well, not biologically, but he raised me since I was six, so yeah. He’s my dad.”

I smile slightly, rubbing circles into Tae’s waist. A knock on the door interrupts the quiet atmosphere and I nudge Taehyung.

“Time to get up.” I tell him.

He pouts slightly, but gets up and instead sits in the chair across my desk.

“Come in.” I say to whoever knocked.

Yugyeom, JB, Youngjae, Yoongi, Hoseok, Eunae, and a few others enter the office. We wait until everyone else gets here to finally start the meeting.

“Alright,” I start as Jimin shuts the door. “Let’s get started.”


	16. 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Choco choco choco chip, it's choco chips. Choco choco choco chips, my choco chips.

_Taehyung_

Today’s meeting was much longer than yesterdays, so much so that I nearly fell asleep a few times. All we were discussing was the plan and exactly who would do what and when and how the whole operation would go. It was interesting in the beginning, I admit, but then people started arguing about stupid details. For instance, a man named Park Bogum was arguing with Mark about how, exactly, we should enter the buildings.

Mark said we should sneak in and attack them off guard, Bogum said we should just storm the place. It got to the point where even Jeongguk started getting annoyed, though he hid it well. But if you looked close enough, you could see his eye twitch slightly and his frown deeper than usual. When I finally get tired of listening to the useless banter I turn to look at the pair, annoyance painting my face.

“Yah! Would you two quit it already?! You’ve been going at it for almost thirty minutes and, honestly, both ideas suck!” I shout, interrupting the two up.

“Well do you have any better ideas?!” Bogum retorts.

I growl slightly, not liking how he raised his voice at me.

“First of all, watch the way you fucking talk to me or I’ll cut your tongue out, don’t fucking test me. Second of all, yeah, I do have a better idea so shut the fuck up and listen.” I snarl, effectively shutting not only Bogum up, but everyone else in the room. “We split up into two groups, one each to handle the first two groups, and attack at the same time at night. We shut off the power and cut phone lines first, then enter through each entrance/exit so that no one can get out. We go floor by floor, killing everyone, mark the place with our insignia, then leave. The whole operation shouldn’t take more than an hour, ninety minutes max.”

There’s a moment of silence in which two things happen. One, Bogum very much visibly backs down, slightly shrinking into himself. And two, Jeongguk lets out a soft, short airy chuckle, causing me to look back at him. The older leans forward on his elbows, propping his chin on his interlocked hands. A slight smirk plays on his lips as he stares intently at me, dark, galaxial orbs focussing on me and me alone.

“Presume we follow along with that plan and it succeeds, then what? There’s still another group to get rid of.” He says.

“We start stage two. The last group will be on edge after the first operation, we want to magnify that fear and suspense as much as possible. We do this through a bit of psychological torture, almost. We’ll start by stalking the members, make them partially aware of the stalking but unaware of who’s behind it or how to get out of it. Get them constantly checking over their shoulders, scared of every person in the room, reluctant to go out. Leave little memorabilia of our own mafia and its members hidden around where they can be found because they’ll subconsciously be looking for us and any little thing that reminds them of us will just increase that fear and paranoia.

“When they’re scared, their natural instinct is to either get rid of what’s scaring them or find some sort of safety. Since they can’t get rid of what they can’t see or reach, they’ll choose the second option: aka home base. That’s when we start the final stage; extermination. The set up will be more or less the same as the first operation, cut off power and phone lines first and enter through all entrance/exits. However, rather than swiftly killing everyone, prolong their deaths. Make their deaths slow and painful, go bold and bloody. And when we’re done, we leave our mark where  _ everyone _ can see.” The plan came out of my mouth with little effort.

These are the kinds of plans I’m used to making, although on my own and without sharing them with anyone else. I know everyone thinks my actions are random, how I complete my missions is a complete spur of the moment thing, but that couldn’t be far from the truth. I plan everything out, down to the last letter, to the last step, to the last breath. I’ve done it since I was young, since before I even met Namjoon. I’ve done it so much that planning these operations are a habit to me now, sometimes I even make them without realizing it.

Jeongguk looks at me blankly for a while, lips in a straight line and eyes completely emotionless. He doesn’t blink or move, but if you look closely enough you can see his chest rise and fall a bit as he breathes.

“Bogum, you and the scouting unit go and join the scouts I already sent out. I want to know everything about those groups and where they live. Namjoon, if you could, I’d like you to find the blueprints to their bases and see if you can gain access to their power supply and phones. You’re all dismissed.” He finally says, leaning back in his seat and unclasping his hands.

I frown slightly, not liking how he completely dismissed my plan. Everyone begins to file out of the room and after a moment so do I.

“Namjoon, stay for a minute, there’s something I’d like to talk to you about.” Jeongguk calls out.

I look over at Joon, catching his eye as he turns back around. He gives me a small smile but all I do is frown, looking at him in worry. He quietly chuckles before coming to me, placing a hand on my waist as he looks down at me.

“Everything’s fine, bub. Don’t look so worried, yeah?” He asks gently.

I pout slightly, but mumble an “okay”.

“I’ll tell you what, come with me after dinner and we can have a Disney marathon, okay? It feels like it’s been ages since we spent some time together.” Joon tells me.

“Promise?” I ask, holding up my pinkie finger.

“Promise.”

He interlaces his pinkie with mine and we put our thumbs together, kissing them before letting go. Joonie ruffles my hair, making me chuckle a bit.

“Go ahead now while I talk to Jeongguk, okay?” Joon says, patting my bum.

I nod, continuing on my way out when I get stopped again, this time by Jeongguk.

“Taehyung, come and see me when you’re finished in your workshop.” He tells me.

“Okay.” I respond, flashing him a small smile before finally leaving.

I skip my way back down to my workshop. The lights are still on when I walk inside, but the vinyl I had playing has stopped. Ignoring the body for now, I head to the record player and change the vinyl, putting on Billie Eilish. The mellow music begins and I turn back to the operating table, climbing on top of the dead, mutilated body. Butterfly hair clips pin the body’s hair back, revealing bloody, empty eye sockets. Said orbs are sitting in a solution to keep them clean and preserved on a nearby shelf. A clean cut on the gut opens the body, half of the intestines missing, or rather in a metal pan next to me.

I stick a hand into the room temperature body, not minding the feeling. In fact, I rather enjoy the feeling of blood on my hands. It gives me a sense of rush, almost, kind of like the adrenaline I feel while chasing down my prey. It’s the satisfaction of being pitted against someone and knowing you’ll win. You don’t go straight for the kill, no. You give them the benefit of the doubt, play with them, let them think they have a chance and then watch as the hope fades from their eyes as they realize their fate. It’s a wonderful feeling, the kind that gives you butterflies and sends your heart rate through the roof.

After eviscerating the corpse, I grab my suture kit (which is different from my sewing kit) and close the wound, not cleaning it just yet as I’ll be making another incision somewhere else in a minute. It takes me a while to perfectly suture the gut closed, but once I do I wiggle up from my position on the thighs to the hips, grabbing the scalpel and making a deep incision above the heart. I use bone cutters to get the ribs out of the way, tossing them in the trash before carefully taking out the heart and placing it in another solution.

Again I suture the wound close before picking up my scalpel. Rather than removing the brains like I originally planned, I remove his face instead and carefully stitch the skin into a styrofoam mannequin head. I grab some cleaning supplies and clean off the blood from the mannequin head, then set it next to the tray of innards. I quietly hum to the song playing as I remove the hair clips then slide off of the body, going to get a towel to wipe the blood off of my hands.

“What do you want from me? Why don’t you run from me? What are you wondering? What do you know? Why aren’t you scared of me? Why do you care for me? When we all fall asleep, where do we go?” I softly sing along.

For some reason, this part of the song reminds me of Jeongguk. It reminds me of how easily and nicely he reacts to me. He doesn’t treat me like the mad man I am, he treats me gently. He doesn’t seem to care for the voices in my head, and instead just accepts me as a whole. I don’t quite understand why he treats me this way, but I like it, so I won’t question it just yet.

I bring my cleaning supplies over to the body, shifting the organs to another table so I can put the cleaning products on the closer table. After getting back on the table, I grab my silver knife and carefully carve our new insignia into the abdomen. It’s similar to the original rose emblem, but now I add a cobra wrapped around the stem, its head coming to rise near just above the petals. It’s my first time trying out this design, but it came out very well. Satisfied with my work, I start cleaning up the body, even changing it into a new set of clothes, albeit with some difficulty.

I transfer the body into a large, rectangular box full of shimmery, gold tissue paper, gently setting it in place before grabbing the tray of innards and decorating the body with it. Wiping my hands again afterwards, I place the top over the finished product and tie a gold ribbon around it. I tuck in a prewritten letter into the ribbons, gold lettering spelling out the names “Hyejin & Hyunki” and topping everything off with a bow. I leave the box on the floor and stand up, grabbing the heart and placing it in a medium sized, jade green box.

I put the top on and tie on a black ribbon this time, also placing a letter in the ribbons but this time with green lettering spelling out the name “Misun”. I add a bow as well, then finally put the jar of eyes in a cylindrical, violet box. After putting on the top and tying on a white ribbon, I place the last letter addressed to “Deiji & Seojun”. Clapping to myself in excitement as I’ve finished, I stop the music and leave the room, shutting the lights off. I make my way to my room and take a nice, long shower, scrubbing all of the blood off of me and from beneath my nails.

After my shower I make sure to lotion my skin, dressing myself in an oversized, cream colored turtleneck with a white stripe near the hem. I pull on a pair of baby pink lace panties, then short, white satin shorts on top of that. I brush out my hair, leaving it slightly messy, and put on a pair of round glasses. I slide on a pair of cream, fuzzy socks, then finally head to Jeongguk office. However, on the way I get an idea and instead go to the kitchen, finding Hobi whom I greet brightly.

“Hi Taetae! What’s up?” The older asks, pulling me in for a big hug and kissing the top of my head.

“Joonie and I are having a Disney marathon tonight and I thought I’d make chocolate chip cookies.” I answer, kissing his cheek afterwards.

“Ah, sadly I think we need to go to the store. Jin hyung used up a lot of the ingredients for breakfast this morning. Plus I know you bake a lot and they haven’t got much to work with, they don’t even have an electric mixer!”

“What?!”

“That’s what I said! I was really craving your chocolate lasagna too!”

I chuckle at the other. “Don’t worry, I’ll ask Ggukie if we can go to the store when I go see him.”

“Oh right, he did ask to see you, didn’t you? Well, you better hurry up, I don’t think he likes waiting.”

“No, but I wanna make a list of everything we need beforehand. You know how I get in stores.”

Hobi laughs. “Once you get in we can never get you out!” He exclaims, making me laugh.

“I know, I know, I just get curious.”

“I know, I love that about you. You wait here while I get you a notepad and pencil, okay? I’ll be quick.”

“I believe you.”

The older leaves and I watch him go. Once he’s gone, I look through all of the cabinets and the refrigerator, seeing what’s there so I know what we need. I’ve come up with a pretty big mental list by the time Hobi comes back, and together we sit and make a list of everything we need.

“And that’s it!” I exclaim after writing down the last ingredient.

Hobi claps his hands, his excitement making me laugh.

“Thank you for helping me with this.” I say, standing up.

“Of course! Now go and get your ass to Jeon’s office, it’s been a few hours since the meeting ended. I’m sure he’s getting impatient now.”

“Ah, you’re right. I’ll see you later, Hobi.”

“See ya, Taehyungie. And make some extra cookies for me, okay?”

“Of course!”

With that, I give Hobi one last hug before skipping up to Jeongguk’s office, holding the notepad with the list in my hand. I knock on the door several times, waiting for the other to say “come in”. When he does, I open the door slightly, poking my head through and looking at Jeongguk. His dark eyes are already trained on me, eyebrow raised in amusement. I give him a big smile, chuckling slightly as I walk all the way inside the office.

“Hi Ggukie!” I say, the door shutting behind me.


	17. 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He can't see the little angel get hurt.

_ Jeongguk _

_ “...Make their deaths slow and painful, go bold and bloody. And when we’re done, we leave our mark where  _ everyone _ can see.” Taehyung concludes. _

_ I can’t help but feel both shocked and confused because of what Taehyung said. Shocked because his plan is absolutely brilliant, and confused because he came up with a well rounded plan so easily and quickly, yet he’s never been in a meeting to make plans like these.  _ Why hasn’t he ever been in a meeting? What has Namjoon been doing with him this whole time? Why does he keep Taehyung so shrouded? Why hasn’t he ever used his abilities to their full capability?

_ “Bogum, you and the scouting unit go and join the scouts I already sent out. I want to know everything about those groups and where they live. Namjoon, if you could, I’d like you to find the blueprints to their bases and see if you can gain access to their power supply and phones. You’re all dismissed.” I announce, leaning back in my seat and letting my hands rest against the table. _

_ I notice Taehyung frowning slightly and frown a bit myself.  _ Why is he frowning? _ I want to ask him what’s wrong, but as I am he stands up and begins to walk away.  _ Guess it isn’t that important if he doesn’t want to talk about it.

_ “Namjoon, stay for a minute, there’s something I’d like to talk to you about.” I say, stopping the older male before he leaves. _

_ Namjoon walks back over to me, and I notice him making eye contact with Taehyung as he does, a worried look now accompanying the younger’s frown. Namjoon chuckles slightly, walking up to the smaller and placing an arm around his waist. They speak quietly with each other for a moment, and I watch as they interlock their pinkies, the pads of their thumbs coming in contact before they peck them. Namjoon ruffles Taehyung’s hair, making him laugh a bit, before he says something else to the blonde and pats his bum. Taehyung responds to whatever Namjoon says, smiling lightly before leaving. _

_ “Taehyung,” I call out, grabbing said male’s attention. “Come and see me when you’re finished in your workshop.” _

_ “Okay.” He answers, smiling at me before leaving. _

_ I watch as he skips away and smile a bit at his cuteness. The few people that were still in here leave as Namjoon takes a seat across from me, clasping his hands together in his lap. _

_ “Is there something wrong?” He asks. _

_ “There’s nothing wrong, per say, it’s mostly something I’m just curious about. About Taehyung.” I clarify. _

_ Namjoon raises an eyebrow, but motions for me to keep speaking. _

_ “In these past two meetings I’ve come to realize that Taehyung has a very unique skill set in just planning operations alone. He’s been able to come up with a very exceptional plan in such a short amount of time, he exudes so much resoluteness and authority when it comes to work, and yet not once has he ever participated in meetings such as these since before yesterday. I know you said that what you did before joining wasn’t to your full capabilities, but why have you not harnessed even a little more of Taehyung’s abilities? He told me he used to even do paperwork before you took him off of that two years ago. Why have you been limiting him?” I question, severely confused by the elder’s actions. _

_ Namjoon takes a moment to respond, taking in a deep breath. _

_ “Taehyung told you when we first met that he is the most powerful member in our group, and that couldn’t be even more true. I admit, he is a terrifying foe and a powerful ally, no matter what role you put him in. The boy can annihilate an entire mafia with a smile on his face and not break a sweat. But what you don’t know, or have not realized just yet, is that there are many sides to Taehyung, most of them which you do not want to see. I ‘limit’ him because it keeps these sides from showing. It keeps Taehyung sane, it keeps our group safe, and most importantly, it keeps my son alive.” He tells me. _

_ I follow along with what he’s saying, but frown once he says it keeps Taehyung alive. _

_ “What do you mean by keep him alive?” I inquire. _

_ Namjoon runs a hand across his face, sighing heavily. _

_ “Taehyung, as you can probably already tell, has a very child-like, almost innocent, personality. He’s like that to make up for the childhood he never had. But when it comes to work, or when it  _ came _ to work, he always knew how to set his childness aside and become focused. Focused Taehyung and childish Taehyung are two completely different people. Focused Taehyung has sharper senses and reflexes, he thinks faster and better, he’s quick and efficient, he’s stronger and deadlier and more ruthless, his bloodthirst becomes so suffocating you can barely stand in the same room as him. And no matter what, he will  _ always _ complete a mission - even if it means hurting himself. _

_ “The last time Taehyung was that focused was his eighteenth birthday. We were on a mission as a group, an annihilation mission. It was our first and last as a group. Taehyung managed to get ahead of us, I told him not to go but he assured me he’d be fine. I listened because at the time, I believed no other to be as strong or stronger than Taehyung, he’s a completely different breed of human.” Namjoon pauses, gulping as he recalls what happened next. “But when we finally caught up to him, there was a knife in his chest, right where his heart is. He had fought hard against one of our biggest enemies, his own knife was just a breath away from the enemy’s throat. If he had just moved a little closer, he could have cut his throat out. But moving any closer would have caused the knife in his chest to actually pierce his heart.” _

_ Namjoon stops again, looking at me with a blank face. “And do you know what he said when I told him that?” He asks. _

_ “No.” I answer, feeling the horrible knot in my stomach to grow. _

_ “He looked at me with such rage and hatred in his eyes and said ‘then at least I’ll be taking this bastard with me’.” He scoffs lightly. “Taehyung is the most exceptionally gifted person I have met in my life. He’s strong, fearless, smart, and so much more. He could have done so many great things had he not been born in this life, but even so he’s become extremely successful. But Taehyung is also the little boy with big green eyes, curly blonde hair, rosy cheeks and big box smile that I met when I was thirteen. He’s still the little boy I raised from six years old, the same little boy who loves to be cuddled and wear oversized clothing and bake different kinds of sweets for his hyungs. Taehyung is my son, and I could never watch him get hurt, especially not for the reason of wanting to kill our enemy. I’d rather my enemy live than my son die. I have always, and  _ will _ always, spend my life keeping my family safe- keeping Taehyung safe.” _

The conversation plays over and over in my mind, rendering me incapable of focusing on my work. I mindlessly stare at my desk, fighting with myself in my head. On one hand, I want to exploit Taehyung’s abilities to their fullest, but on the other hand, I don’t want to do it if there’s a risk of Taehyung getting hurt. Something about the thought of seeing the young boy in a hospital bed (or even worse, a coffin) gives me such a sick feeling and makes me want to protect him at all costs.

I could never imagine just what Namjoon had to go through when Taehyung was stabbed above his heart, and frankly, I never  _ want _ to imagine it. I spend so much time in my own thoughts, thinking about the entire ordeal, that I nearly miss the knocking on my door.

“Come in.” I call out, hoping that there’s actually someone to bring me from my thoughts.

The door slowly cracks open and a tuft of blonde hair peeks through, then bright green eyes, and before I know it, Taehyung’s entire head is past the door. I raise an eyebrow at the younger, amused with his actions. Taehyung sees my gaze and chuckles, the sound unconsciously making me smile, before walking inside the office.

“Hi Ggukie!” He exclaims as the door shuts behind him.

“Hi Tae.” I respond, pushing my chair back as Taehyung skips towards me.

The small boy sets down a notepad on my desk before plopping into my lap, facing towards me, and wraps his arms around my neck. My hands find perch on his waist, eyes wandering down to take in his cute and fluffy appearance.

“You look adorable, bun.” I say, the words coming out before I get the chance to stop them.

Taehyung giggles, a light blush coating his cheeks. “Thank you, Ggu.” He murmurs.

I smile at his shyness and move a hand up to brush his hair from his face.

“You’re welcome, bun. How’d everything go in your workshop?” I ask softly.

You can see the excitement grow on his face, something that has me chuckling to myself.

“Really good! I did everything I said I’d do except take out his brains! I did something else! And then I packed almost everything up in pretty boxes with ribbons and letters to send to his parents, wife, and children! Joonie found out who they are and where they live for me!” He exclaims.

“Did you now? And what did you do instead of taking his brains out?”

“I cut his face off and sewed it onto a mannequin head! That one I’m not sending out, though. I’m setting it on a pike outside.”

That has me stopping, looking at the blonde in confusion.

“Why?” I ask, more intrigued than anything else.

“Because! If I’m sending warnings to his family then I need to send one to the person who hired him too! ‘M gonna kill ‘em when I find ‘em! I’ve already decided on decapitation!”

“Hold on, Tae, back up for a moment. Are you insinuating that the person who hired the assassin is in my mafia?”

“I’m not  _ insinuating _ anything, Ggukie. I’m stating it!”

“What makes you so sure?”

“Because~” He draws out the word, playing with my tie as he swings his legs back and forth. “How else would the assassin have gotten in here if there wasn’t someone on the inside helping him? Did you know that even Joonie couldn’t find this place? And Joonie can find everything! It’s sometimes scary, hehe. And it took me  _ three months _ to find this place! It usually only takes me two to three weeks to find someone’s base but it took me three months to find yours. Yours is like- super,  _ super _ well hidden! So if Joonie couldn’t find it, and if it took me that long to find it, then there’s no way anyone outside of the mafia could find it. That means that S.I.O is either a current member, or one who was let go from the mafia.”

“I thought you got rid of all of my rats.”

“I did too, and I’m sure Joonie did too since he’s the one that found them all. I guess this one is just really two-faced and good at covering his tracks. Don’t worry though, I’ll find him. Pinkie promise!”

The younger holds out his pinkie finger to me and I laugh softly.

“You’re so cute, bun.” I whisper, wrapping my pinkie around his.

Taehyung hears what I say, cheeks going red slightly, and whines, making me laugh again.

“Now we stamp thumbs, and seal it with a kiss!” He tells me.

I do as he says, pressing our thumbs together, and we both lean in, planting a kiss on our thumbs.  _ And maybe I wanted to move our thumbs and lean in closer. _

“Oh! Ggukie! I almost forgot to ask! Can we go to the store?” Taehyung asks, leaning away and pulling our hands apart.

“For what?” I question.

“To buy groceries and ap-ap-ap-appliances! That’s the word! I forgot it for a second.” He pauses to laugh to himself. “But Joonie and I are having a Disney marathon after dinner and I wanna make cookies, but we don’t have everything in the kitchen. So I thought we could go to the store and stock up on a lot of ingredients.”

"That sounds like a good idea, bun. Why don't you grab everything you need and meet me by the front door, yeah?"

"Okay!"

I smile as Taehyung hops off of my lap and dashes out of the room, his giggles following after him. As I quickly clean up my desk and shut off my laptop, I notice Tae left behind his notepad and pick it up, recognizing the fancy, cursive writing from the letters attached with the marionettes. I slip the notepad in my pocket, planning to give it back to Tae when we meet up again, and leave my office. For some reason, I seem to notice just how quiet and empty the halls are as I head to my room. I’ve always known the house to be quiet and empty, but it’s really dawning on me, now, just how depressing it really is. In my room I grab car keys, my phone, and wallet, then make my way to the front door to meet Taehyung.

“Oh, Jeongguk-” I turn around to face Yugyeom who’s carrying a stack of files.

I see the files and sigh, not feeling like doing more work right now.

“Just set the files on my desk, Yugyeom. I’ll do them when I come back.” I tell him, about to walk away when he stops me again.

“Come back? Where are you going?”

“To the store.”

“The store? Why?”

“To buy things. That’s what you do at the store, isn’t it?”

“Uhm, right. Sorry to keep you held up. I’ll drop these off. Do you want me to go with you?”

“No.”

“But- are you sure you want to go alone?”

“I’m not going alone. Taehyung’s coming with me. I have to go now, bye.”

I leave without letting him respond, slightly hoping Tae hasn’t been waiting for me long. When I see him, I can’t help but coo at his adorableness. The younger runs about the foyer, holding a paper airplane in his hand and making airplane noises through giggles. A daisy crown sits on his head, slightly lopsided, and he carries a little satchel, white sneakers on his feet. I watch him for a while, smiling at his antics. Without warning, I step forward and pick him up by the waist as he dashes past me. The younger squeals loudly, laughing as he wraps his legs around my waist.

“What are you doing, huh?” I ask, tickling his sides.

“G-Ggu-kie st-stop i-it! T-tickles!” Taehyung manages to say through his laughs.

I obey his plea, still smiling as he calms down.

“J-J-J-Jimin m-made a p-p-paper a-airplane! A-a-and there w-was this p-p-pretty lady n-named M-M-Mina and she g-gave me a f-f-f-flower crown! S-s-she called me c-cute and ad-d-dorable! I l-l-like her a lot! She w-was at the m-m-meeting but I d-didn’t know, b-but I l-l-like her!” He stutters cutely.

“I know I keep saying this, but you’re so damn cute, bun.” I reply, pinching his bread cheeks.

He squeals again and I laugh. Taehyung places his hands on the sides of my face, squishing my face and giggling.

“I l-love your smile, Ggu! S-so, so p-p-pretty!” He tells me.

“Thank you, bunbun. Let’s get going now, yeah?”

“Mmm!”

I carry him out to the garage, the younger still playing with his paper airplane. I help him into my car and quickly get into the driver’s seat, starting the car before placing my hand on Taehyung’s thigh. He places one hand on top of mine, using the other to turn on the radio, and then we set off for the store.


	18. 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Leashes and cookies

_ Jeongguk _

“I hopped off the plan at LAX with a dream and my cardigan! Welcome to the land of fame excess,  _ whoa _ , am I gonna fit in? Jumped in the cab, here I am for the first time! Look to my right and I see the Hollywood sign! This is all so crazy, everybody seems so famous! My tummy’s turnin’ and I’m feelin’ kinda homesick, too much pressure and I’m nervous! That’s when the taxi man turned on the radio and the Jay-Z song was on! And the Jay-Z song was on, and the Jay-Z song was on! So I put my hands up, they’re playing my song, and the butterflies fly away! Nodding my head like  _ yeah _ , movin’ my hips like  _ yeah _ ! I got my hands up, they’re playing my song, I know I’m gonna be okay!  _ Yea-a-a-ah _ , it’s a party in the USA!  _ Yea-a-a-ah _ , it’s a party in the USA!” Taehyung sings loudly, blasting the radio.

The windows are rolled down, wind blowing in our hair. Taehyung managed to find my sunglasses in the glove compartment and they now sit on my face as the younger made me put them on (“a guy in a suit and sunglasses is always a turn on. And when you pull up your sleeves, ugh- yes daddy”), as well as make me roll my sleeves up. I listen as Tae sings, smiling at his little dances. My hand still grips his thigh, softly squeezing the soft flesh from time to time. The ride seems to end all too soon as we enter the parking lot to the grocery store. Taehyung is quick to unbuckle his seatbelt and hop out of the car, dashing towards the store door. I hurry after him, not wanting him to run around on his own.

“Ggukie! Cart!” The younger shouts once I enter.

People give us weird looks but we pay them no mind. I walk up to the younger, hooking my arm around his waist before pulling him to my side.

“Don’t leave my side, bun, okay?” I order as we go grab a cart.

“Okay.”

I should have known that Tae wouldn’t have followed what I said. Knowing the younger, he’d be quick to run after anything he finds interesting. And that’s exactly what he did. No matter how many times I drag him back and tell him not to run off, he keeps doing it anyway.

“Tae, stop fucking running off. I won’t tell you again.” I finally snap, grabbing said boy by the arm and speaking harshly into his ear so as to not cause a scene.

Almost immediately shame and sadness replaces Taehyung’s excitement and joy. The younger bows his head, fiddling with his sweater sleeve.

“‘M sorry, Ggukie.” He mumbles.

I sigh and let go of his arm, lifting my hands to gently cup his cheeks. I lift his face to meet mine, feeling slightly guilty for causing the downcast look on his face.

“I’m sorry for being so mean, bun, but I need you to stay by my side. I know nobody knows who you are or has seen you but we can never be too careful, yeah? I know you’re curious and that’s fine, but stay where I can see you.” I tell him.

“Okay, I will.” He responds.

“Good boy.”

I ruffle his hair slightly and lean forward, pecking his forehead. Taehyung gives me a shy smile, holding onto my arm as I push the cart.

“Bun, can you go into my pocket and grab your notepad? You left it in my office before we left.” I say, looking at the items on the shelves around us.

As he does as I say, I notice a particular item nearby that will certainly be useful, especially when Tae and I go out. So, after telling Tae to stay by the cart, I quickly grab the item and pay for it, returning back to Taehyung shortly after.

“What’s that?” He asks, peering at the box as I open it.

“Something for us to use so that you can still walk around without getting too far from me.” I answer.

I pull out the object inside- a pink coil rope with two velcro cuffs on the end, a lock on both cuffs. I grab the key and attach one cuff to my left wrist, locking it on before grabbing Tae’s right wrist and putting the cuff on.

“There. All done.” I announce, slipping the key into my pocket and packing up the empty box.

Taehyung looks at the cuff in wonder, tugging on it slightly. I smile softly at his curiosity and gently nudge him forwards.

“Let’s go now. We have a lot to buy.” I say.

The younger smiles and nods, looking down at the list he wrote and grabbing things accordingly. I watch as things begin to pile up and up and up no matter how we place objects. It gets to the point where we almost have to get another cart. Occasionally Tae will walk off again, but thanks to the wrist bands he doesn’t get too far. The cart gets heavier and heavier with each item Tae grabs, it also doesn’t help that he’s stocking up on groceries.

“Okay, okay that’s it!” He  _ finally _ announces, setting three boxes of vanilla extract into the cart.

“Thank God.” I mumble, grunting a bit as I push the cart.

“Is it too heavy, Gguk? Should we get another cart?”

“No, it’s fine. We’re leaving anyways.”

“Okay…”

The younger pouts a bit and I can’t help but smile softly at his concern.

“It’s fine, bun, really. As you put it, I’ve gotta put these muscles to use, right?” I joke.

Tae chuckles, blonde hair bouncing as he nods. “Right.”

We go to checkout, waiting in line behind a few other people with much less items compared to us. When it’s finally our turn, I can practically hear the cashier and bagger boy sigh at all of the things we have and mentally agree with them. It takes a while to get everything onto the conveyor belt, and I let Taehyung out of the cuffs to get another cart. While he’s gone I put the cuffs back into their box and keep placing things on the conveyor belt. Once he’s back, the two of us stand in silence together, watching as the total cost of everything rises and rises and rises.

Tae stands directly in front of me, his back pressed closely to my front and his head resting against my shoulder. I wrap both of my arms around his middle, hugging him to my body, and let my head lay on top of his. His own arms come to rest on top of mine, his hands intertwining themselves in mine as well. I allow myself to relax as I hold onto the younger, breathing in his scent. Taehyung always has this soothing scent surrounding him, something like vanilla and maybe lavender.

“Ggu, they’re done.” Tae says softly, tapping my hand slightly.

I open my eyes, not even looking at the cost as I pull out my credit card and slide it through, taking my card back when it says the transaction was successful. Taehyung grabs the receipt while I put my card away and then go to grab the cart, muttering a “thanks” to the workers. We somehow manage to pack everything into the car, and I partially regret taking my car and not the SUV. The ride home is much quieter, the music playing in the background as my hand rests on Tae’s lap, the blonde playing with my fingers.

I send workers to bring everything into the kitchen while Tae and I rest in the living room, sitting on the couch. Tae leans his back against the armrest of the couch, his legs on my lap. The younger practically purrs as I knead into his exposed legs, bringing my hands up his sweater and slightly up his shorts to feel more of his plush thighs. My pale, inked hands contrast greatly with his smooth, honey skin but it’s one I enjoy more than I’d care to admit. I slip my hand further up his sweater, fingertips running against his stomach before feeling the bandage covering his tattoo. I let my touch linger there a bit longer before slowly dragging back down and gripping onto his thigh once more.

“How’s your tattoo healing?” I gently ask the younger, noticing his hazed eyes.

“Hmm? Oh, it’s healing well. Jinnie hyung changed the bandage when he woke me up this morning.”

“That’s good. Does it hurt?”

His hair falls into his face as he shakes his head, and I reach a hand up to push it back. I let my hand trace the outline of his face, then softly cup his hand in my cheek.  _ I smile a bit when he leans into my touch _ . I take in his splendor for what seems to be the hundredth time, burning the image into my memory. Everything about the boy seems so god damn angelic and divine as if he descended from heaven itself. His beauty shines as bright as the morning star, and I can’t help but drown in awe everytime I see him.

“Stop staring.” He cutely whines, plump lips falling into a pout.

I smile gently again, caressing his cheek.

“You’re so beautiful, bun. How could I not?” I ask.

A beautiful rose color rises to his cheeks as he whines again. I merely chuckle, moving my hand down to wrap around his back. Tae grabs onto my hand, clasping them together and moves so that he can lay his head on my shoulder.

“Do you want to make the cookies with me?” He questions.

“Do you want me to?”

“Yes.”

“Then I will.”

“But do you  _ want _ to?”

“Yes.”

“Okay. Let’s start then. Jinnie hyung is gonna start dinner soon and I don’t want to be in the way when he does.”

“Alright.”

Tae swings his legs off of me before bounding towards the kitchen. I follow behind him and we start unpacking everything, tossing the bags into the trash.

“So, how do we do this?” I ask, tying on the black apron the younger handed to me.

“What? Bake?” Taehyung ties on his own, personal apron. A light pink, flower printed apron with ruffles and pockets.

“Bake cookies, specifically.”

“They’re really easy, they’re the first things I learned to bake. First off, we wash our hands!”

I chuckle slightly, but do as the other says. The next half hour is spent making two rather large batches of chocolate chip cookies (and another fifteen throwing flour at each other). I’d never admit it to anyone, but making cookies with Taehyung is, perhaps, the most fun thing I’ve done in years. I can’t even remember the last time I had fun, let alone smile. Yet Taehyung seems to be making me do both without even trying. We had just begun dividing the dough up and placing the balls onto cookie sheets when Namjoon entered, looking at us with raised eyebrows and a small smile.

“Oh, Namjoon.” I say once I see the older.

“Hey, Jeongguk. You guys almost done with the cookies?”

“We’re putting them on sheets now, Joonie!” Taehyung answers, smiling brightly at his hyung.

“I missed everything else?”

“Well, they were going to be a surprise~”

“Ah, I see, I see. Well, I really hate to ruin the moment, but Jeongguk, Yugyeom told me he put more files on your desk to take care of.”

I sigh, knowing that if I don’t get them done now I’ll be up until early morning trying to finish everything.

“Alright, I’ll be there in a minute. Let me clean up first.” I respond, already heading to the sink to wash my hands.

I quickly dry off my hands and take off my dirtied apron, about to hang it up when Taehyung takes it from me.

“It needs to be washed.” Is what he says before gently cupping the side of my face, leaning up on his tiptoes to bring a damp washcloth to my cheek.

It’s silent as the cloth continuously grazes over my cheek, the younger paying much attention to what he’s doing. I can’t help but want to smile at how serious he seems, eyebrows slightly furrowed and lips in a natural pout. Flour dusts his cheeks and part of his forehead from our fight earlier, the sight threatening my lips to tug upwards.

“All done.” He suddenly says, snapping me from my slight daze. “You had flour on your face.”

“You still have some on yours.” I reply.

“I know! I’ll clean it when I’m done. You go to your office. I’ll bring you some cookies when you’re done.”

“You better.”

I ruffle the younger’s hair, finally smiling slightly when he chuckles and lightly pushes me towards the door. I give Namjoon a small smile as I pass by him, the older doing the same, and head back to my office, unconsciously slipping back into a business mentality. My office is empty when I arrive, a rather large stack of files on my desk. I take a seat and pick up my pen, sliding a file in front of me and opening it.

I go through the document, changing some things here and there before signing at the bottom. I close the file, setting it aside, and grabbing another folder. The process repeats over and over, the sun setting behind me.  _ It’s going to be a long night _ , I think, looking at the still tall stack of work to do after three hours.


	19. 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You're my dad, boogie woogie woogie

_ Taehyung _

“Do you want some help?” Joonie asks once Jeongguk leaves.

“Yes please!”

Joonie laughs a bit before taking the apron that Jeongguk had on, putting it on himself. Meanwhile I put the first batch of cookies in the oven, quickly setting my duckie timer before helping Joonie form more cookies.

“So, did Jimin already take out your packages for you?” Joonie asks.

“Mhm! He did it right before Ggukie and I went to the store. And he gave me a paper airplane! Oh, wait, I left it in Ggukie’s car. Oopsies. I guess I’ll ask him if i can grab it later.”

“You seem to be getting close with Jeongguk. Is the process finished?”

“Mmm! He actually takes to me really well. I was really surprised at first, but I like it. I like him. He’s different.”

“I think I can see. Just a little, at least. He seems to be proving to be a good choice, after all.”

“Of course he is. I chose him. When have my predictions about people ever been wrong?”

Joon chuckles slightly. “Never.”

“Exactly!”

I notice the older dip his finger into a bowl of cookie dough, lifting the raw dough to his mouth. I squeal loudly in horror, rushing to push his finger away.

“Joonie nooo! Don’t eat that! It has raw eggs you’ll get sal-sal-sal-sal-”

“Salmonella?” Namjoon finishes with a light chuckle.

“Yes! That’s the one!”

We both laugh as we continue to bake the cookies we talk about random things. That’s how all of our conversations go. Just hours upon hours of talking about the most random of things from linguistics to astronomy, and from anatomy to archaeology. Almost everything I’ve learned in my life, I’ve learned from Namjoon. He’s been my everything since we met; my best friend, my teacher, my dad. I never would have made it this far without him, I owe my life to him.

“What are you thinking about, little one?” Joon asks, bringing me from my reverie.

I smile softly, shaking my head a bit. I look down at the counter top, tracing random patterns into the surface.

“Just about us. How far we’ve come. What we’ve been through. What we learned together.” I pause my actions, looking up at the other who already smiles fondly at me. “You know I love you, right?”

“Of course I do.” He responds, quickly pulling me into a hug. “And I love you, my little apricity.”

My smile widens at the nickname and I bury my face in the taller’s chest, holding him tightly. The duckie timer goes off, cutting our hug short. I let out an excited squeal, glad all of the cookies are done. Letting go of Namjoon, but not before pecking his cheek, I quickly take out the last trays of cookies. I move them to another rack to cool, taking the ones that already cooled down and stacking them on a plate. I make a separate plate of cookies, hiding them where I know the others can’t find them, as I plan on giving them to Jeongguk later.

“And what do we have here? Did you two make cookies  _ without _ me?” A new voice questions.

“Jinnie hyung!” I squeal, turning to the pink haired male.

I bolt towards him, jumping into his arms. Jin laughs as he quickly holds onto me and I chuckle alongside him.

“What are you doing, you big baby?” He asks, pinching my nose.

I giggle, smiling largely. “N-n-nothing~”

“Oh? So you and Joonie  _ didn’t _ make chocolate chip cookies without telling me?”

“N-nope!  _ G-g-g-gukie _ a-and I d-d-d-did! B-but G-g-g-gukie had to g-go ri-ight when w-we were s-s-s-s-shaping them s-s-so Joonie h-helped me fi-inish ‘em!”

“Did they now?”

“U-uh h-huh! A-a-and G-gukie and I h-h-h-had a f-f-flour f-fight! B-b-but we c-c-cleaned up s-s-s-so d-d-don’t wo-orry!”

“You cleaned up? But there’s still flour all over your face! You look like Casper the Ghost!”

I laugh loudly, not minding when Jin hyung sets me on the island counter.

“I k-k-know! I d-d-d-didn’t ha-ave t-t-time to w-wipe it o-o-off y-yet!” I explain, swinging my legs back and forth.

“Well, why don’t you go and get cleaned up now, okay? When you come back you can help me with dinner.” Jin says.

“O-o-okay!”

I hop off the counter and dash out of the room, not without taking off my apron. In my room I quickly wash off my face and make sure I look okay before hopping my way back down to the kitchen. Namjoon sits at the island, watching as Jin prepares everything. I laugh to myself, knowing that the elder forbade Namjoon from ever cooking as he has the tendency to destroy everything.

“‘M back!” I announce, putting my apron back on.

“Oh good. Can you start chopping the onions and scallions for me?” Jin asks.

“Course, hyungie.”

We get started on making dinner (we’re making bulgogi), talking and laughing and singing to music that Namjoon hyung began to play at my request. Somewhere along the way, Jiminie and Yoongi, as well as Jackson, Mark, JB, and Bambam join us. They said they smelt something delicious and heard singing so they came to see what was happening. It was a lot of fun, our little group having expanded double over its original size. And I don’t mean just the cooking group, I mean my family and I joining Jeongguk’s mafia.

They may not be a family just yet, but with time they will be. We all will be. But first- they have to pass my test. I’ve already shadowed after all of them, and I’ve talked to some of them. Not enough to move onto the next stage, but enough to get an idea of where to head things towards next. So as I help Jin cook, alongside Yoongi, I make conversation with Jackson, Mark, JB, and Bambam.

They react well with my topics, and even add on to the, in Jimin’s words, headassery. Once dinner is done, Jin has Jimin and Bambam set the table. After quickly depositing my apron on the counter I take my seat in between Namjoon and Jimin, swinging my legs back and forth as I wait for a plate to be set in front of me. 

“Here ya go, bubs.” Jinnie says, putting food on my plate.

“Thank you, hyungie!”

Everyone happily digs into their meals, not talking much as we’re all busy savoring the food. When the rest of our two groups join they, too, grab themselves something to eat and take a seat, having to fill up the island as there’s not enough room for everyone at the table. As I grab Joonie’s water, taking a few sips, I look around the entire room. Everyone seems content, having short conversations when they aren’t stuffing their faces. The lack of a certain black haired, onyx eyed male, however, has me slightly frowning.  _ Is he still working? He should take a break and eat. I’ll bring him some food after I’m done. And the cookies, too. _

I slightly nod to myself, happy with my decision, and continue eating. Not surprisingly, I’m the first one to finish eating. I usually eat quickly, but stick around and talk with the others while they eat. This time, on the other hand, I get up as soon as I finish eating and put my plate in the sink. I grab a clean plate and load it up with bulgogi, setting it to the side as I find a tray in one of the higher cabinets. I place the plate on the tray before retrieving the cookies I hid earlier and setting it next to the bulgogi. Afterwards, I put a pair of chopsticks next to the food as well as a glass of water.

“Tae, what are you doing?” Hobi asks as I’m leaving the kitchen.

“Bringing Ggukie dinner.” I answer without looking back.

I make my way up to Jeongguk’s office, carefully balancing the tray in my hands so I don’t drop or spill anything. The walk to his office seems longer as I move slower and more carefully than usual, wanting to get his food to him in mint condition. Once in front of his door, I balance the tray on my knee and use my free hand to quickly knock, holding the tray properly right after.

“Come in.” I hear him say.

I swiftly turn the doorknob but use my shoulder to push the door open, holding back onto the tray. I walk backwards through the door because of this and use my foot to shut the door. Jeongguk is already watching me with curious eyes when I turn around, standing up and walking towards me when he sees the tray I’m carrying.

“What are you doing?” He asks, taking the tray from my hands.

“I brought you dinner!”

His lips slowly curl into a smile. “Thank you, Tae. You didn’t have to.”

“No, but I did anyway. You weren’t at dinner so I assumed you’d still be working. You should really take a break.”

“Yeah, well,” He gestures his head towards his desk and I shift my gaze to see practically the entire desk full of files. “Yugyeom brought me more work earlier, so unless I want to be here all night I probably shouldn’t take a break.”

I frown slightly. “How’s there so much to do? These are business deals, right?” Jeongguk nods. “And those are all being accepted?”

“No, I’m still going through them all to decide which to accept and which to decline.”

“Wait, so, you’re deciding which deals to choose, overviewing them, and signing them yourself?”

“And changing them where they need to be changed.” Jeongguk makes his way to his desk and I follow suit, sitting in the chair across from him as he makes room to set the food down.

“No wonder it’s taking you forever. Why don’t you have a secretary or someone to choose the good deals and change them where needed so that all you have to do is overview it and sign?” I question.

“I don’t have anyone trained to do it nor do I have the time to train someone, not to mention how risky it would be to go out and find someone to do it.”

I grin cheekily, another idea coming to mind.

“Well, you’re in luck, Mr. Jeon. You now have someone who was trained by a man with an IQ of 148 and already has two and a half years of experience in the business field. And I’ll have you know that Joonie trusts only me besides himself to handle our business deals. Even now, though the work takes up a lot of his time, he won’t let anyone help him with it. Just me.” I tell Jeongguk, leaning forwards on the desk.

“Didn’t he stop you, though, from doing paperwork?”

“Yes, but it had nothing to do with my efficiency. You can ask him yourself. I was going on a lot of missions back then as well as doing paperwork and he thought it was too much for me, but like I said last time I know I could’ve done much more than what I was doing.”

Jeongguk sighs softly, looking at me through his lashes. I stare back at him, a part of me wondering what’s going on in his head.

“I’ll think about it. For now, I think you should head back down to Namjoon. You two do have a Disney marathon to begin, afterall.” He says after a minute or two of silence.

My head perks up at that. I almost forgot about the marathon.

“Oh! You’re right! I have to go now. See you later, Ggukie! Hope you like the cookies we made!” I exclaim as I jump out of my seat, dashing towards the door.

I hear Jeongguk’s light chuckle just before I make it out of the room, making sure to shut the door behind me. I smile to myself at the sound and keep running down the hall.

“Joonie!” I yell as I near the sitting room. “Namjoonie! JoonJoon! Joonie bear! Appa! Papa!”

I barrel into the sitting room, finding Namjoon standing in front of one of the couches, remote in hand. He looks up at my shouting and just barely sets the remote on the coffee table before I jump onto him.

“Joonie! Hehe, you caught me!” I say through a laugh.

“I dropped you  _ once _ before!” He defends.

“Once every week for the first four months we knew each other!”

“Well, you managed to bounce back every time. Literally, you actually bounce. I still don’t get it.”

“I think it’s cause I’m so squishy!”

“That’s probably it, Tae bear.”

“You’re squishy, too, Joonie! And you always give the best hugs, ‘specially after you drop me.”

I laugh at the older’s embarrassed face and squish his reddened cheeks.

“You’re my dad, boogie woogie woogie!” I sing while pinching his cheeks.

“And  _ you _ ~” Namjoon rubs his nose against mine, dimples showing as he smiles, “are my little apricity.”

I squeal, holding tight onto Namjoon as he sits on the couch.

“Okay, so, I got Disney Plus on-”

“ _ Without _ breaking the tv?” I interrupt while sliding off of his lap, instead curling into his side.

“Yes, without breaking the tv. Now, what do you wanna watch?”

“High School Musical!”

“Okay, High School Musical for the hundredth time this year.”

“ _ Hey _ ! It was  _ seventy-three _ times! Not a hundred!”

“Okay well seventy-three times in only seven months.”

“It’s a classic!”

“A classic would be like- Cinderella or Snow White and the Seven Dwarves.”

“Don’t disrespect High School Musical like that! It’s amazeballs!”

“That’s not a word.”

“Yes it is! Look it up! I’m never wrong!”

“Psht.”

Namjoon ruffles my hair as he pulls up the movie.

“Wait, blanket.” I say right before Namjoon plays the movie.

“Oh, right.”

Namjoon grabs a blanket hanging from the back of the couch that I didn’t notice earlier. He drapes it over the both of us and I snuggle more into his side, resting my head against his chest. His arm comes to wrap around me, pulling me into him more, if even possible. He plays the movie and I unabashedly say the lines alongside the characters. Namjoon quietly chuckles beside me as I belt the lyrics to Something New, doing both Troy and Gabriella’s part as well as adlibs.

Once in a while Joonie will join me in singing or saying lines and the occasional cringing in second hand embarrassment. It goes on like that for the second and third High School Musical movies, as well as Frozen and Frozen II.

“Into the unkoooooooown~ Into the unkoooooooown~ Into the unknooooowwoooowwoooonn~” Both Joonie and I belt, mine admittedly  _ much _ better than his.

We erupt into a fit of laughter, attempting to finish the song but failing miserably. We just barely make it to the end of the movie, by which time I’m already in tears, that Jin enters the room, smiling softly at the both of us.

“Hey guys,” He pulls our attention from the movie to him as he sits next to me.

I reach out an arm, tugging him closer so he can cuddle me which he immediately does.

“I really really hate to interrupt this, but Joon there’s something that requires your immediate attention.” Jin tells us.

I frown at that, not wanting Namjoon to leave but aware that I can’t keep him from something important.

“Oh, um, Tae-” Namjoon begins.

“I know, Joonie. It’s okay, really. Go take care of whatever it is. We can finish another time.” I interrupt.

Namjoon gives me a small, sad smile before leaning in and kissing my forehead.

“I’ll hold you to it. Don’t stay up too late. I love you, my apricity.” He whispers, rubbing his nose against mine.

I smile back, nodding softly. “I love you too, Joonie. Now go and do your thing before you get sleepy. We all know how you get when you’re tired.”

The older jokingly rolls his eyes, grinning while he stands up. The blanket falls from his lap as he gets up and pauses the previously forgotten movie.

“Are you going to watch another movie?” Jin asks, getting up as well.

“Probably, but I’m gonna take a break first. I wanna stretch for a bit.” I answer.

Jin nods and both he and Namjoon leave, leaving me in the dimly lit room. I sit alone for a moment or two, mind and body void as I stare at nothing. When I pull myself from my reverie, I rise to my feet and place the blanket back on the couch before leaving. The halls are pitch black and silent excluding my echoing footsteps. I let my body guide me rather than my head, trying to block out the steadily rising giggles. It’s easy to block them out when I have something to distract me, but in times like these when I’m alone, and especially enveloped in darkness, I’m weak to their advances.

A part of me loves the excitement and chaos and fear they bring, and the other part wishes that, just for one day, I could live a  _ normal _ life. At least, not hear voices in my head. But I know that will never happen, and yet still there’s a part of me that is thankful for that. I stop in front of a door, dim lighting coming from beneath it.  _ Is he still working? It’s been about seven hours since I left. I hope he took a break, he really needs one. _ I knock softly on the door, waiting for the quiet “come in” before opening the door.

Sure enough, Jeongguk is still sitting behind his desk, though a lot more.......disheveled. He lost his vest and tie and the top few buttons of his shirt are undone. His usually neatly parted hair now messily falls in front of his face, and he holds a coffee cup in his hand.

“Tae? You’re still awake?” He asks, his words slightly drawn out.

“I should be asking you the same.”

I start walking towards his desk, unable to help the bubbly feeling in my stomach when Jeongguk sets his coffee down and pushes his chair back, gesturing for me to sit in his lap. I straddle the other’s lap, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my head on his chest. Jeongguk places one hand on my back and the other on my head, playing with my hair.

“How’d your marathon go?” Jeongguk questions.

“It was fun. Joonie and I cuddled a lot and we sang to the songs and stuff. We would’ve watched more movies but Joonie had something important to do. How about you? Did Yugyeom bring you more work?”

“Yup. Honestly, I think he hoards the shit then gives it all to me at once.”

I chuckle at that. “Take a break, come watch a movie with me.”

“I ca-”

“Don’t say you can’t, because you can. There’s no point in stressing yourself over all of this work and running only on coffee until sunrise. Your exhaustion is bound to catch up with you soon and what will you do then? Half ass your work until you fall asleep on your desk? That’s not gonna work, Gguk. Come take a break with me.”

I lift my head from his chest and reach out to gently cup his face, my thumb brushing over the small scar on his cheek.

“Please.” The word comes out softly, breathlessly.

I can feel Jeongguk stop breathing for a moment, though I don’t think he notices it. I give him a curious look as his eyes bore into mine.

“Okay,” He whispers before repeating it, louder this time. “Okay.”

He hooks his arms under my thighs and I quickly wrap my arms around his shoulders as he stands up. I lay my head on his shoulder, playing with the hairs at the nape of his neck as we head back to the living room. Jeongguk dramatically drops me on the couch and I laugh once he falls next to me. I watch as he stretches out on the couch, his entire body taking up all of the couch.

“Holy shit, you’re a long boy.” I speak without thinking.

Jeongguk snorts, grinning slightly as he grabs my arm and pulls me down onto him. I giggle loudly, smooshing my body between the back of the couch and Jeongguk’s body, though I mostly lay on the older. I manage to pull the blanket from beneath us (along with telling Jeongguk to get his big ass up so I can actually get the blanket), as well as the remote. Handing off the remote to Jeongguk, I cover us both in the blanket, slightly readjusting myself to lay even more on top of Jeongguk.

“Okay, so,” I begin, taking the remote from Jeongguk. “Let’s watch the Princess and the Frog.”

“You want to watch a Disney princess movie? Better yet, you want  _ me _ to watch a Disney princess movie?”

“Hey! They’re classics! Everyone loves them!”

“Not me.”

“You don’t even watch movies so you don’t get a say!”

“Whatever.”

I pull up the Princess and the Frog, pressing play and immediately snuggling into Jeongguk. The older wraps one arm around me, the other grabbing onto my thigh.

“I swear, you have an obsession with my thighs.” I mumble as we watch the intro to the movie.

I feel Jeongguk shrug beneath me before squeezing my thigh.

“You have nice thighs.” He tells me, and I remember the time when I said the same to him.

I smile at the memory, looking up to see Jeongguk slightly grinning but not looking at me. Slightly shaking my head, I turn back to the tv in time to sing the first song.

“In the South Land there’s a city, way down on the river, where the women are very pretty and all the men deliver. They got music, it’s always playin’, start in the day time, go all through the night. When you hear that music playin’, hear what I’m saying, it makes you feel alright.”

Jeongguk moves his arm from my waist to my head, fingers carding through my hair. We watch the movie quietly, except for my soft singing, and cuddled up with one another, and before I know it, I’m already crying because of Ray’s death.

“Are you crying?”

“Of course I am, don’t judge.” I answer through sniffles.

Jeongguk just softly chuckles, reaching up to dry my tears. I nuzzle into his chest when he’s done, unconsciously drawing random patterns on his side.

“Wanna watch another movie?” I ask as the end credits begin to roll.

The older nods once. “Sure.”

I pull up one of my favorite Christmas/Halloween movies of all time: The Nightmare Before Christmas. I sit up once it begins, pushing Jeongguk’s legs off the couch so I can actually have room to sit. The older grunts in slight annoyance as his feet hit the floor and sits up as well, no longer under the blanket as it came off when I sat up. I don’t pay attention when Jeongguk starts moving, but just as I’m about to break into song he grabs onto my waist and pulls me back. I shriek out in shock, Jeongguk softly shushing me as my back hits his chest. He takes the blanket from me and wraps it around himself before slightly sitting me on his lap, wrapping me in the blanket as well as he hugs me from behind.

After the shock finally passes, I cozy myself against Jeongguk, our legs entangling beneath the blanket. I wrap my arms around his waist again, resting my head on his chest. Meanwhile Jeongguk places one arm around my waist and the other, of course, on my thigh, and rests his chin atop my head. I turn back to the tv, luckily not completely missing the opening song (one of my favorites).

“I am the clown with the tear away face, here in a flash and gone without a trace. I am the who when you call 'who’s there?', I am the wind blowing through your hair. I am the shadow on the moon at night, filling your dreams to the brim with fright. This is Halloween, this is Halloween, Halloween, Halloween, Halloween, Halloween.” I sing.

Jeongguk doesn’t seem to mind when I act/sing the movie word for word. In fact, at times, I’ll notice that he taps his fingers on my thigh in tune to the beat of some songs. He might not have said it aloud, but I can tell he likes the movie.

“Kidnap Mr. Sandy Claws. I wanna do it. Let’s draw straws. Jack said, 'we should work together'. Three of a kind. Birds of a feather. Now and forever. Wheee, lalala, lalala. Kidnap the Sandy Claws, lock him up tight. Throw away the key and then turn off all the lights. First we’re gonna set some ba-” I get interrupted by someone suddenly walking into the sitting room, looking at Jeongguk and I with raised eyebrows.

“What are you two doing?” Yugyeom asks.

Both Jeongguk and I simultaneously look at the intruder, giving him a blank look. I pause the movie, not looking away from Yugyeom who just stands in the doorway.

“What does it look like we’re doing?” I question, not meaning to sound so harsh but also genuinely confused as to why he had to ask what we’re doing when it’s very obvious.

Yugyeom gives me an irritated look. I slightly growl, not appreciating how he not only interrupted our movie and one of my favorite songs, but also has the gall to be  _ irritated _ with  _ me _ .

“Watch the way you look at me, go-”

“What do you want, Yugyeom?” Jeongguk questions loudly, cutting me off.

I look at him over my shoulder, annoyed that he cut me off. The older gives me a stern look as if telling me to stop, but also soothingly caresses my side beneath the blanket. I quietly huff before looking back at Yugyeom, not so subtly shuffling closer to Jeongguk even though we’re already practically attached to each other.

“I went to your office to tell you that I left the last few files on your desk. Your lights were on and you weren’t there but your laptop was also stil-” Yugyeom starts.

“Just say you came to find me, Yugyeom, I don’t need an entire story. I’ll take care of it. You can leave, now.” Jeongguk quickly interrupts Yugyeom’s spiel.

Yugyeom immediately stops talking, head bowing slightly.

“Yes sir.” He says before leaving.

Behind me Jeongguk sighs loudly, dropping his head onto my shoulder. I feel his breath on my neck and try not to giggle at the feeling.

“Forgive me, but I should start handling that work.” I hear him mutter.

“But it’s almost five already. We should go to sleep, you especially.” I counter.

“I have to get it done.”

“And you can get it done  _ after _ you’ve gotten some sleep. Seriously, when’s the last time you had nine hours of sleep?”

“I don’t know, but I’m fine, Taehyung. I want to get a few more done before I go to sleep.”

“You really won’t stop until the sun rises, will you?”

“Nope.”

“Fine, but I’m helping you.”

“Tae-”

“Nope. I don’t wanna hear any ‘ifs’, ‘ands’ or ‘buts’ about it. I’m helping you and that’s final.”

Jeongguk chuckles, both the feeling and sound sending electricity through my veins.

“You sure you don’t want to sleep instead?” He asks.

“I’ve already made up my mind, and once I make up my mind next to nothing can change it.”

“Okay then. Let’s get going now, yeah?”

“Mmm.”

I stand up first, partially annoyed that we had to stop cuddling. I turn off the tv as Jeongguk gets up, ruffling his hair and stretching. We quietly walk to his office and I fight off the exhaustion that’s only just now starting to creep up on me. Once we make it to his office, we both sit down (me sitting on the other’s lap) and start working. I only do what I offered to do when I brought Jeongguk his dinner; decide which ones were worth accepting and making changes where necessary. It took me a moment to get the hang of everything again, but soon enough I did.

As I work through files my eyelids grow heavier and heavier until I’m just about asleep while in the middle of a file. My head lolls forward, eyes practically shut, and the pen I was using lays idly in my hand. Maybe it was my imagination or the fact that I’m more or less asleep, but I could’ve sworn I heard Jeongguk say “cute” and slightly nuzzle into my hair before picking me up. However, at that time I had already succumbed to the dark abyss.


	20. 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Clingy baby hates it when he's woken up

_Jeongguk_

Taehyung clings onto my shirt as I pick him up bridal style, carefully turning off the lamps. I already shut off my laptop and cleaned up while Tae was in the process of falling asleep, so luckily I don’t have much left to take care of. We got through a lot of work, it went a lot faster and smoother with Tae helping me. Plus he was right, he edited the files without a hitch, I was surprised.  _ Namjoon did teach him, afterall. Besides, he’s smart all on his own. I should be glad to have someone like him working for me. _ I carry Tae back to my room, too tired to bring him to his room and walk back to mine. The smaller immediately curls into a ball when I set him down, burying his face in the blankets.

I slightly smile at the sight, deciding to leave him for now. In the meantime, I change into a pair of sweats, not bothering to put on a shirt, and make sure the curtains are completely shut to block out the sunlight. I quickly plug my phone into the charger and grab a sweatshirt from the closet, setting it on the edge of the bed before I sit down next to Taehyung’s sleeping form. All I can see is his hair and his closed eyes, the rest of his face hidden by the blanket. I run my hand through his hair a few times before slightly shaking him.

“Tae, wake up, bun.”

The younger whines softly, burying his face further into the blankets. I chuckle slightly and shake him more.

“C’mon, Tae, just for a minute so you can change.”

“Don’ wan’.”

“Will at least let me sit you up so I can change your shirt?”

“No.”

“Not even for one minute?”

He shakes his head. “Wan’ sweepy.”

“Wan’ sweepy? You mean you want to sleep?”

“Ish wha’ I shaid.”

I sigh softly, tugging the blankets away and causing Tae to whine loudly, reaching out to grab them again. I grab onto his wrists, gently pinning them to the bed.

“No, you need to change first. It won’t even take a full minute, and afterwards you can sleep for as long as you want.” I tell him.

He makes a sound of disapproval, quickly pulling his wrists from me and turning over to the other side.

“Tae,” I slightly groan, grabbing his shoulder.

Almost immediately the other turns back around, rising to his knees. His eyes are only partially open, lips set in a deep frown as he points a small knife at me. Where did he get the knife? I have no fucking clue. Am I surprised that he pulled out a knife from nowhere? Just a bit.

“Bother me while I sleep again and I’ll cut your hand off.” He growls.

Irritated a little now, I grab his wrist and twist it a bit, causing him to drop the knife. I pick it up before he can and toss it aside. After it’s gone, I grab Tae by the waist and pull him flush against me. He gasps a bit in surprise, eyes wide in confusion as I grab the hem of his sweater, pulling it off.

“C-cold.” He whimpers, holding onto me for warmth.

I hold onto his waist, calming him a bit by caressing his soft skin. I drop his sweater to the floor and grab my sweatshirt, carefully putting it on the other.

“There. That wasn’t so hard, now was it?” I ask as I gently lay Tae down.

He mumbles something I can’t understand and I chuckle to myself. I lay down beside him, pulling him closer to me before covering the both of us with the blanket. Tae rests his head against my chest, arms bunched up between us and our legs intertwined. I bury my face in his golden locks, whispering him a “goodnight” before closing my eyes and falling asleep. When I wake up, it’s only a few hours later because of incessant knocking on my door. I regrettably blink my eyes open, finding myself laying on my back with Tae almost completely laying on top of me.

I would have studied his features for a while had it not been for the knocking. Making sure Tae is still asleep, I carefully slide from under him and pull the blankets up to his neck. However he still reaches out in his sleep, looking for me with a pout set on his lips. I leave him be, figuring he’ll stop soon, and go to the door. I open it quickly, abruptly ending the knocking, and rest one hand on the wall beside the door, the other on the doorknob.

“What the fuck do you want?” I snap, glaring at Yugyeom.

“T-there’s a meeting you have t-” He begins.

“Send Namjoon in my stead.”

“What-”

“Did I fucking stutter? I said to send Namjoon in my place.”

“But sir your presence is n-”

“Ggu?”

Both Yugyeom and I look at Taehyung. The younger sits up, one hand holding the blankets and the other rubbing his half open eyes. My sweatshirt is huge on him, something I didn’t notice when we went to sleep, and makes him look even smaller than he is. My breath catches in my throat when he looks at me, whining slightly as he holds out his arms to me.

“Come back to bed, Ggu.” He drawls out.

“In a moment Tae,” I reply, giving him a soft smile. “I just need to take care of something really quick. Go back to sleep, I’ll be there before you know it.”

I turn back to Yugyeom after that, my smile immediately dropping.

“I’ll tell you one last time to do as I say. Debrief him on what the meeting’s about, he doesn’t need to do much besides show up. And also tell Namjoon that Taehyung’s with me.” I order.

“But s-”

I stop listening when I feel arms wrap around me, Tae’s small body snuggling against my much larger frame, and I automatically bring my arm from the wall to around his waist. The cute pout on his lips contrast heavily with the deadly glare in his eyes, the usually bright orbs darkened as he looks at Yugyeom.

“If Jeongguk tells you to do something then fucking do it without complaint. Quit badgering him like a damn chihuaua and for hell’s sake let him fucking sleep.” Tae snarls.

“And who are  _ you _ to tell  _ me _ what to do?” Yugyeom retorts.

Although his tone of voice annoys the hell out of me, I leave it to Tae to handle what he started.

“The person who helped him take care of the work  _ you _ continuously stacked on him  _ knowing _ that he’s the only one doing it, and instead of having the decency to evenly space the work out so that he’s not doing practically all of it at once you drop everything onto him, keeping him up until five in the damn morning. I’m also the only person besides Namjoon who  _ can _ help him, unlike  _ you _ who’s only the delivery boy. So, little  _ lap dog _ , why don’t you be a good boy and go do what Jeongguk asked you to do  _ three times _ and quit fucking interrupting our sleep? Keep in mind that the next time you do interrupt us it’ll be  _ you _ who can’t sleep for a month straight after I’m done with you. Oh, and one last thing, watch how you fucking act around me from now on, I don’t condone disrespect.” With that, Tae slams the door shut in Yugyeom’s face.

I bite my tongue to keep from laughing, finding the way Taehyung deals with people who disrespect him hilarious. Tae then pulls me back to bed, practically pushing me down before crawling next to me, nestling into my side.

“Mmph, warm.” I hear him mumble as I pull the blankets over us.

I thread my fingers through Tae’s hair, and it isn’t long after that he falls back to sleep. I close my eyes as well, focusing on the other’s soft breaths as I, too, end up falling asleep. The next time I wake up, I feel much more energized than I have in a while. Taehyung is still fast asleep, lips slightly parted as he breathes on my chest. I look at his sleeping form for a while, studying the way his long lashes gently brush against his skin, how his cheeks appear even softer than usual, how lips are set in a permanent pout.

His chest rises and falls with mine, one hand clutches my index finger and the other bunched up between our bodies. I smile at his smaller hand holding onto my finger as I bring my arm from his waist to his head, running my fingers through his hair. It seems to be a habit I’ve developed around him, unable to stop myself from playing with his hair. The action slowly brings Taehyung from sleep, green eyes groggily opening. He lets out a big yawn, smacking his lips a few times before looking at me.

“Goo’ mornin’.” He grumbles, voice thick with sleep.

I chuckle lightly. “Good  _ afternoon _ .”

He looks confused for a moment, tilting his head to the side slightly before nodding.

“You’re probably right. What time is it?” He asks.

I grab my phone from the nightstand and turn it on, ignoring the dozens of notifications and instead just checking the time.

“A little over two pm.” I tell him.

“Mmm......good sleep time.”

“What?”

“Good sleep time, we slept long.”

“Oh.”

Taehyung sits up and stretches, a long, low groan escaping him. He ruffles his hair, messing up the already messy locks. He looks around the room a few times, each time his eyes flickering with an unknown emotion and the small frown he sports deepening. I’m about to ask him what’s wrong when he suddenly looks down at me, straddling my lap at the same time.

“How’d you sleep?” He questions, his fingers lazily tracing one of my tattoos.

I place my hands on his thighs, not missing the small smile that replaces his frown when I do.

“I slept well. You?”

“Really good. You’re really warm.”

“Am I now?”

He nods, slightly giggling. “Like a human space heater.”

I smile a bit, simply watching the younger look at my tattoos in fascination.

“I don’t wanna do anything today.” He tells me.

“Then don’t. There isn’t much to do until the scouts come back.”

“I have to help you with the files.”

“You don’t  _ have _ to, Tae-”

“Yes I do, or else you’ll end up doing what we did last night and stay up all night working. Face it, Jeongguk, I’m helping you from now on.”

“You’re stubborn.”

“Thank you. Now let’s go eat, I’m hungry.”

With that he slides off of my lap, falling directly onto the floor. I sit, shocked by his actions for a second before it finally registers and I sit up.

“Tae, what the fuck?” I ask, getting off the bed.

Taehyung just bounces back up and gives me a confused look.

“What?” He says.

“Why did you do that?”

“Why not?”

I look at him, slightly bewildered, but then again Tae is the type of person to do random things without reason.

“Okay then. I’m going to take a shower.” I tell him, already heading into the bathroom.

“I’m gonna head to my room to get changed. I’ll meet you in the kitchen.” Tae says as I shut the door.

“Okay.”

I get into the shower, standing under the hot water and letting it loosen my muscles. After a long time, but before the water gets cold, I actually wash myself and get out. My skin erupts in goosebumps when I step into the cold and I quickly dry myself off, wrapping the towel around my waist before going back into my room. The room is empty and the bed made, all signs of Taehyung being here completely disappeared. His sweater is gone and so is the knife I tossed and not a single thing is out of place. It’s almost as if he were never here.

Shaking the thoughts from my head, I go to my closet and look for an outfit. I pick up a black button up, noticing that the second one I got isn’t there. Normally I buy my shirts in pairs in case something happens to the original (such as a messy operation or execution). I simply shrug it off for now, figuring I wore it already but forget. Soon I put on the shirt as well as white pants and black shoes. I push my sleeves up to my elbows and leave the top few buttons of my shirt undone, then do my hair and brush my teeth before heading to the kitchen. What awaits me, though, has me stopping in the doorway.

Jackson, Yoongi, and Bambam are all sitting at the island, talking about something. But what catches my attention is the blonde boy busying himself at the counter, wearing a far too familiar black shirt tucked into white shorts that show off his feminine curves. The shirt is huge on him, sliding off his shoulders and revealing the unmarked, honey skin. After the initial shock passes I walk up to Taehyung, ignoring the other three in the room. Upon closer inspection I see the black gladiator sandals on his feet and how his hair is more curled than usual. Just as I’m going to grab his attention he turns around, slightly squeaking from surprise.

“Jeez, Gguk, you scared me.” He says, but all I can focus on is how pretty he looks.

He definitely did curl his hair and a silver hair comb with black diamonds pins some of it to the side. He wears makeup, albeit minimal, that just defines his natural beauty, and a pink gloss makes his lips shine. Just like me he left the top few buttons of the shirt undone and pushed the sleeves up, and maybe my eyes linger on his collarbones a little too long. On his left ear is a chain earring connecting from his ear lobe to his helix, and on the other ear just a simple silver stud. On top of all of that, I notice a small, silver jewel on the side of his lower lip.

“You have a lip piercing.” I say without thinking.

“Huh? Oh, yeah. I’ve had it for a while, I just haven’t worn any rings recently. But Jiminie just bought me this one. Isn’t it pretty? It’s a lotus flower.”

“Yeah, it is. Are you going somewhere?”

“Yup. Papa has Yoonie and I doing something important for him. We’ll be out for a few hours so I won’t be able to help you with the files, but I finished a lot before I fell asleep for you to handle. We’ll be back before dinner and Satan so help me if you’re doing work instead of taking a break and eating I’ll drag you down by the ear. You may be my boss but don’t test me.”

Before I can even say anything, he pushes me into a nearby seat next to Yoongi, effectively gaining the group’s attention. A moment later and a plate of peanut butter toast with a side of a berry and granola parfait is placed in front of me and another second after that Tae is handing me a cup of black coffee.

“Breakfast. Or lunch, actually. Whatever, you get it. Yoonie do you have my purse?” Taehyung goes from one task to another that I barely keep up, still partially puzzled about what’s going on.

“Yeah. You ready to go?” Yoongi asks the other, standing up.

“Yup! See you later, Ggukie. Squirtle and Bammie, I expect you two to help me with tonight’s dessert.”

“Aye aye, Captain!” Jackson and Bambam say in unison, making Tae laugh.

He says one last goodbye before leaving with Yoongi.

“So,” Jackson says once they’re gone, giving me a smug look, “he’s totally wearing your shirt, isn’t he?”

“Yes, he is. He must’ve taken it when I was in the shower.” I answer, picking up my toast.

“So he really did  _ sleep _ in your room?” Bambam questions.

“How did you know that? And yes, he did. I didn’t feel like carrying him back to his room after he fell asleep while helping me work last night.”

“Oh really? Yugyeom told us, said that Taehyung snapped at him for no reason when he was telling you about the meeting.”

I roll my eyes. “Yugyeom is being overdramatic. He woke me up to tell me about the meeting and wouldn’t listen to my orders despite telling him three times. Taehyung woke up because of it and more or less put him back in his place.”

Jackson and Bambam hold back their laughs.

“How bad was it?” Jackson asks.

I smirk slightly. “Let’s just say that Yugyeom won’t be interrupting our sleep or disrespecting Taehyung anymore any time soon.”

The two snort at that, laughing lightly.

“Honestly, even though Tae is literally the most adorable and nicest person I’ve ever met, he scares the living hell out of me. I still get nightmares about those marionettes of his, and the way he apprehended that assassin was downright brutal. I wonder what even happened with that guy. Is he still in the cellar?” Bambam inquires.

I shake my head. “Taehyung interrogated him for me the other day, we got everything we needed from him and then I let Taehyung do whatever he wanted with him.”

“How the hell did he get him to talk?”

I chuckle a bit, taking a sip of my coffee. “He played a game.”

“A game?”

“What kind of game?” Jackson asks.

“How many of the assassin’s bones he could break before he decided to talk. He made it to four.”

Both of their faces pale at that, and I laugh quietly.

“Remind me to  _ never _ piss Tae off.” Bambam mumbles.

“Will do. Oh, and Jackson,” I call out. “Why did Taehyung call you Squirtle?”

The other rubs the back of his neck, slightly embarrassed.

“Cause I have a lot of squirtle merch.” He answers, chuckling awkwardly.

I raise an eyebrow but make no comment.

“Well, boss, Bam and I are gonna head out. You feelin’ like the shooting range today?” Jackson asks Bambam.

“Uh, yeah, sure, why not?”

And with that the two leave. I finish my food and place my dishes in the sink before heading up to my office. Sighing as I sit down, I eye the work in front of me for a moment before picking up my pen. Time passes both slowly and quickly as I go through the files Taehyung prepared for me. Honestly, I don’t even know how he got through so many in less than two hours. I would have thought he wasn’t actually reading everything and making correct changes at how fast he was working this morning, but everything was done better than I could have anticipated.

As I finish up the last file someone knocks on my door. I quickly sign the paper, shouting a “come in” before setting the file aside. The door opens and Taehyung walks in, looking as flawless as when he left. Not expecting to see him so soon, I glance at the clock only to see that it’s five, almost six.

“You’re back.” I state the obvious.

“And you’re still working.” Taehyung responds, gliding over and sitting across from me.

“I actually just finished. How’d your thing go?”

He shrugs, toying with the collar of his (my) shirt.

“Good, I suppose. We were more or less following up on a previous mission.” He tells me.

Something about him seems off, like he’s not completely here. His eyes have a distant look in them as he stares at the desk, continuously fiddling with his collar.

“Tae, are you okay?” I ask.

He looks up at me, giving me a soft smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes.

“‘M fine. Just have some things on my mind.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

He shakes his head. “Not really. I came here for something, but I can’t remember what.”

“Dinner, maybe? It’s almost six.”

“Ah, no, not that. Not yet anyways.”

Taehyung closes his eyes, reaching up a hand to gently massage his temple. He murmurs something that I can’t understand before sighing softly.

“Not dinner, but ‘m having Jackson and Bambam prep dessert for me now.” He pauses for a moment. “Namjoon wants to see you. Don’t remember why, though.”

“Taehyung, are you sure you’re okay?” I question again.

He nods, still not opening his eyes.

“I’m like this more often than you’d think. Can’t expect me to be all sunshine and rainbows all the time, can you?” He chuckles sarcastically.

“Is it the demons?”

That question has him opening his eyes, looking up at me. His eyes bounce back and forth between focused and unfocused and he momentarily stops rubbing his temple. He doesn’t say anything, but he does nod slightly before closing his eyes again.

“Part of it.” He mumbles.

He stays seated for another minute or two and lets out a big sigh. I watch as he stands up, fixing his shirt and fluffing up the back of his hair.

“Well, I’m gonna go and check on Jackson and Bambam. Namjoon wants to see you, pretty sure I already said that though. Take a break, okay? I’ll come back and help you with the rest of these files after dinner.”

“Taehyung, you’re really sure you’re fine?” I ask as he opens the door.

He turns around, giving me somewhat of a reassuring smile.

“Thank you for your concern, Gguk, but really, I’m okay. Oh, and Namjoon’s in his room.” He tells me.

Taehyung leaves me with a heavy mind, and as I make my way to Namjoon’s room after cleaning up I constantly wonder if Taehyung really is okay. He may have said he was, but his body language said otherwise. I don’t expect him to be happy all the time, but I at least hope he lets someone make him feel better when he’s not.  _ Of course he does. He has five other people to rely on, and I highly doubt they’d let him be alone. _ I knock on Namjoon’s door, hearing a bit of shuffling and talking on the other side. It opens a moment later and Namjoon greets me.

“Oh, good, you’re here. Come in, I just have something to give you.” He says.

I walk inside, giving a short wave to Yoongi who’s also in the room. The white haired male sits on Namjoon’s bed, propped up against the headboard. He merely nods in my direction at my wave, turning his attention back to Namjoon who stands at his desk. Namjoon also has an office here, but I suppose he brings his work to his room as well. He grabs a few papers held together by a paper clip and hands them to me.

“These are the notes I took for that meeting earlier, figured you’d want them. Yugyeom gave me......somewhat...of an idea of what I was there for, but since I wasn’t completely sure I took notes of what I thought was important. You can probably make more sense of them than I can.” He explains.

“Thank you, and sorry for the inconvenience. I completely forgot about that meeting and probably wouldn’t’ve been able to focus if I went.”

“Hey, no worries, it’s all good. Tae told me that you two stayed up late working.”

“We were, he refused to let me finish it on my own.”

“Yeah, he’s like that, refuses to let his family do things on their own when he can help. The only way I got him to actually agree to stop doing my files was by bribing him with my dessert for three months and allowing him to not only choose my outfits everyday for a month but also take whatever he wanted from my closet.”

“The last part wasn’t even necessary, Taehyung takes our clothes all of the time.” Yoongi cuts in.

“Yes, yes he does. But it got him to agree to it, so who’s really winning here?”

“Taehyung.” Both Yoongi and I say.

“Whatever.” Namjoon mumbles.

“Oh, there’s something I’d like to ask you. Both of you, really.” I say.

“What is it?” Namjoon asks.

“Is Taehyung okay? He seemed distant earlier, like something was really bothering him.”

Namjoon sighs while Yoongi answers my question.

“Taehyung gets like this sometimes. One day he’ll be happy and laughing and skipping everywhere, the next he’ll be quiet, melancholic, and lost in his own world. So far we shouldn’t be too worried, all we can do is make sure he’s okay and stays grounded.”

I nod and thank Namjoon for the notes one last time. For the rest of the day I try to keep an eye on Taehyung and make sure he doesn’t get worse, and thankfully he doesn’t, at least I don’t think he does. However, I do notice that he has this little cycle he does to either calm himself or collect himself, I’m not sure which. It starts off with him massaging his temple which continues into him either rubbing his palm against his shorts or scratching at the material. Then he’ll rapidly tap his foot on the ground accompanied by either biting his lower lip or his thumb.

Throughout the entire thing, he’ll constantly bounce back and forth between focused and unfocused, and I notice him repeatedly forgetting things. He’ll try to remember what he forgot, but that just results in him rubbing his temple even more and muttering things to himself before eventually giving up and moving on. None of his family says or does anything about it, so I assume it’s all normal and nothing to worry about. So at the end of the day, when Taehyung resigned to bed early, I figured everything would be fine.

But the next day proved me wrong.


	21. 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He's the devil, and he's not even spiking

_ Taehyung _

I knew the day was going to be bad when I woke up with a raging headache. My head pounds as if it were being beaten in with a mallet, and when I open my eyes the sunlight just makes it worse. Indecipherable words and sentences, both a mixture of murmurs and shouts, fill my aching brain. A deep fury begins to fill my bones and my veins as I sit up in bed, kicking the blankets and sheets off of me.

“Shut the fuck up.” I growl to myself, roughly massaging my temples.

I head into the bathroom, quickly stripping out of my clothes and turning the shower on, setting the water to the coldest it can get. Goosebumps immediately decorate my skin upon standing beneath the water, but it’s the least of my concern right now. I place my hands on the wall and let my head hang, the cold water falling directly on top of my head. The voices in my head seem to grow louder by the second, and with them my anger rises. They all speak at once, only bits and pieces of what they’re saying actually reaching me.

My head is being pulled in different directions, my sight glitching between complete darkness, pure white, and the shower floor. My hands unconsciously curl into fists against the shower wall and my teeth grind against each other as I try to withstand the storm in my head.

“Shut up,” I ground out, my voice barely heard over the water.

“Shut up,”

“Shut up,”

“Shut up,”

“Shut up!”

I rear my head back and slam it into the wall. Chuckles and snickers fill my head from the action and I do it again, and again, and again, and again. Soon the water below begins to stain pink as my blood coats my forehead and the wall. I go to hit my head against the wall again before stopping, staring at my blood against the tile. Consumed by even more anger I punch the wall, muttering a “fuck” before shutting the water off and getting out. I dry myself off and wrap the towel around my waist, then grab the med-kit underneath the sink to bandage my bloody head.

But as I grab the alcohol and cotton pads I make eye contact with myself in the mirror. My body freezes, unable to look away as my mind constantly reshaping and recreating my image. My breathing increases, chest rapidly rising and falling, but despite this I still feel as though I’m suffocating, phantom hands wrapped around my throat and squeezing tightly.

“Go away, leave me alone!” I shout, slamming my fist against the mirror.

It instantly shatters, shards of glass sticking in my fist and some falling into the sink.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.” I repeat, quickly plucking the glass from my bleeding hand.

Blood begins to drip down my face from my forehead but I ignore it for now. Instead I focus on bandaging my fist, cleaning out the wound and slathering on some ointment before wrapping a bandage around it. After that I use one of the bigger shards of glass to see the wound on my forehead. I carefully clean it and dab on the ointment, more or less slapping a bandaid overtop. Before cleaning up the mess I made I take care of my new tattoo, then toss the glass in the trash can and go back to my room to get dressed.

I pull on the first pair of black skinny jeans I see, my knees partially seen through the rips, and a dark maroon hoodie. I put a black jacket over that, and tie on a pair of white sneakers. Since I know the others will make a big fuss over my injuries, I put on fingerless, leather gloves and a black bandana to hide the bandages. I pull my hood over my head as I walk back into the bathroom, switching out the lotus lip ring Jimin gave me with a black hoop and brushing my teeth. I attempt to stay away from my weapons, knowing that an angry me plus sharp objects equals no good, but I eventually give in and grab a random knife, tucking it into a sheathe I put on my ankle.

“I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay, I’m okay.” I tell myself before leaving my room.

The halls are thankfully a lot dimmer than my room, slightly easing my headache. I keep one hand stuffed in my jacket pocket, fist balled and shaking softly, and the other massaging my temple. I try to keep my eyes open and not squint from the pain and also try not to rocket my fist into the nearest object to satisfy the frenzy of rage built up inside of me. All of my senses work on overdrive, magnifying the slightest of movements and sounds. I can hear the usual morning clamour before I see it, my head throbbing even more because of it. I stop before entering the kitchen, trying to tame my anger and headache before entering.  _ I can do this, _ I tell myself.

_ Twenty bucks says he doesn’t last ten minutes. _

_ You’re on. _

_ Pft, thirty says he makes it to fifteen. _

_ Another ten if he punches someone. _

_ Another fifteen if he whips out the knife. _

_ Fifty bucks if he makes it to twenty minutes before snapping, punching one person and threatening another with the knife. _

“All of you shut the fuck up.” I growl to myself, ignoring the hoots and hollers of laughter.

I keep my head down as I walk into the kitchen, quietly taking a seat at the dining table. Everyone’s voices boom in my brain and I almost regret coming down here. I rub harshly at my temple, gritting my teeth as my hand shakes even faster in my pocket.  _ Don’t snap, don’t snap, don’t snap, don’t snap. _

“Morning Taetae!” Jimin’s bright and chirpy voice which usually makes me as happy as he is only drives me further insane.

“Morning Chimmy.” I respond, keeping my voice level.

I keep my head down, my fingers still working at my temple.

“You okay, Tae? You look a little strained.” Jimin says.

“‘M fine, Chim, just a small headache is all.”

_ Liar. _

“Okay, let me know if you need anything.”

“I will.”  _ Not. _

Jimin leaves after that and I loosen my fist a bit, feeling the dampness from sweat in my palm. I slip my hand from my pocket, instead clutching onto my thigh. A searing hot pain erupts through my skull, masking my sight with a blinding white curtain. I grunt quietly from the pain, fingers gripping viciously into my thigh. My body soon begins to shake, unable to contain the unprovoked anger I feel.

“Taehyung? Are you okay?”

_ Oh fuck no. Go away. _

I open my eyes, trying to stop my shaking and appear at least somewhat sane as I turn to face Jeongguk. Said male is surprisingly not wearing a suit and tie, but rather a black hoodie and jeans. He stands in front of the seat next to me, hands in his pockets and head slightly tilted to the side as he gives me a questioning look.

“Oh, hey, Gguk. Morning.” I say, deflecting his question.

“Good morning.” He replies before sitting down.

_ Damnit, I said go away. Leave me alone. _

“I asked you a question. Are you okay?” He asks again, studying me carefully.

_ Stop looking at me like that. _

“Just peachy.” I answer.

He raises an eyebrow at me, eyes slowly raking across my body.

“So you’re shaking like a puppy in the rain, squeezing the life out of your thigh, and massaging your temple because you’re ‘just peachy’?” He questions.

_ Fuck off, I’m fucking fine. How many times do I need to say it? _

“I’m fine, really. Just a bit of a headache. Plus I’m cold.”

“You’re cold while wearing a hoodie and a jacket?”

_ Would you shut up already and quit asking so many questions? What’s so hard about leaving me alone? _

“Cold flashes. Happens sometimes when I get headaches, ask Jinnie.” I tell him.

Jeongguk nods, thankfully dropping the subject. I drop my head again, closing my eyes.

_ Will he punch him? _

_ No he’ll stab him. _

_ No he’ll totally punch him. _

_ Look at his muscles. If he punches him he’ll break his hand. _

_ That’s the best part! _

I unconsciously clench onto my thigh harder, mumbling a “shut the fuck up” to the voices. A hand unexpectedly on top of mine has my eyes springing open and looking down at my lap, my head ringing and burning from the motion. I watch as Jeongguk carefully pries my hand from my thigh, my hand shaking once he does, and moves it onto his thigh instead.

“Squeeze my thigh, don’t hurt yourself.” He tells me.

_ Well fuck. _

_ Can we still stab him? _

_ No, you dumb fuck. We punch him. _

_ All of you are idiots. We do nothing. _

_ But that’s no fun- _

“Fuck having fun right now. Shut your fucking mouths for five damn minutes.” I murmur, trying hard not to slam my head on the table.

It’s the moment that everyone starts to sit down and eat breakfast that I really reach my breaking point. Everyone talks too loudly and too much, their silverware clanks too much against their plates, the lights are too bright and burn my eyes. The suffocating feeling comes back, blocking off my airway and making me dizzy. Tremors rack through my body and soon my body becomes too hot and too small to contain the hurricane inside.

My hands itch, aching to _break_ , to _maim_ , to make _something_ _bleed_ and the bruising hold I have on Jeongguk’s leg isn’t enough. I’ve completely stopped rubbing my temple, my hand reaching up my hood and tugging harshly at my hair. My sight glitches between normal and red and the screaming gets louder, drowning everything else.

And then it all goes quiet.

Everyone stares at me as I stand up, hands flat on the table and head bowed as I shake violently. My seat lies on the floor, having fallen over from the force of me standing up. I let out a deep breath.

Once,

Twice,

Thrice,

Four times.

And then I leave, somehow keeping a steady pace instead of stumbling out. I let my feet carry me to the only place I can be myself without being judged, the red lights immediately welcoming me. I feel my body somewhat calm down, the noise in my head calming slightly. But still the overwhelming urge to  _ break _ something or some _ one _ fills my brain and bones and I just can’t stop  _ fidgeting _ . My eyes roam about the room, searching for something,  _ anything _ , that can quench my thirst and then I see it; the mannequin head.  _ Oh ho ho ho, this will certainly do. Time for a little fishing. _

I look around for the stake Jimin should have dropped off the other day after delivering the packages. It stands next to the door and I stifle a chuckle, knowing that the silver haired male was probably too chicken to actually step inside my workshop and just left the stake here. Said object is made of dark oak and about as tall as me, both ends sharpened to a point. I pick up the stick (it technically is, in my opinion) and grab a knife from my collection. I take a seat on the operation table, laying the stick across my thighs as I carve out our insignia. Excitement begins to bubble alongside the anger, soon almost replacing it as I swing my legs back and forth.

_ What kind of prey do you think we’ll catch? _

_ Probably babies, little ones who don’t really know what it is they’re doing- _

_ -Or their place- _

_ -Or who we are- _

_ - _ What _ we are- _

_ -They won’t know how to fight- _

_ -And if they do they can’t beat us- _

_ -They’ll be passionate- _

_ -Oh so passionate, I love it when their feelings get the best of them- _

_ -Oh me too, it’s so easy to manipulate them- _

_ -And then they break _

_ And break _

_ And break _

_ And break- _

“And, oh, do I love it when they break.”

As soon as I allowed myself to accept the mess in my head, to stop blocking everything out or trying to make it all stop, everything slowly stopped hurting. Everything just made horribly perfect sense, and though I love it I hate it just the same, hence trying to fight it off. Shaking the thoughts for now and deciding to just enjoy the moment, I set my knife down and admire the neatly carved image on the stake. I set it aside and stand up, dusting the wood chippings off of my lap and going to grab the head. I carelessly toss it into a plastic bag and grab the stick before leaving the room.

I fight off a grin as I head to the front door, carefully avoiding anyone on my way out. It’s hot outside when I walk out, but it’s to be expected for the middle of July. I should feel sticky and sweaty because of what I’m wearing, but all I can focus on is the excitement in my veins as I take my hood off. There’s a long pathway leading from the front door to a trail that connects all of the other buildings and bunks to one another. However, at the end of this path is a roundabout that everyone has to pass in order to get where they need to be. The mansion is at the heart of the compound, always on display.

There are already quite a few people walking around, going about their day and obediently completing tasks. So it’s there, at the end of the path, that I drive the stake into the ground, making sure it will stay up on its own. I can tell there are a few people watching me curiously as I reach into the plastic bag. I take out the head, ignoring the shocked and horrified gasps behind me, and stab it onto the top of the stake. Taking a step back, I yet again admire my handiwork, both my carving on the stake and of the neat removal of the face and careful stitching onto the mannequin head. A tap on my shoulder has me turning around.

“Uh, yeah?” I ask the tall, muscled man in front of me.

I keep myself from laughing, seeing the man in my head as a very big pig on two legs.

“The hell is that?” He asks in a gruff voice, pointing at the face.

I raise an eyebrow, seriously wondering if people see something other than what it actually is when it’s right in front of them. What the fuck else would it be? A fucking pinata head?

“It’s a face sewn onto a mannequin head. What else could it be?” I question.

“Whose face is it?” The man completely ignores my question, and that’s when my repressed anger begins to resurface.

“Someone who needed to be taught a lesson.”

The man looks at me, then at the face, and back and forth again and again.

“Wait a second, ain’t I seen ya before. You one o’ them newbies, ain’t ya?” He questions, leaning far too close to me for comfort.

I push him back, slightly gagging from the smell of his breath.

“First off, stay the fuck out of my personal space. I don’t need you polluting my air. Second off, I’m  _ not _ a newbie. I hold more experience and rank over you, so start acting like it. I don’t really appreciate disrespect.” I retort.

A crowd begins to gather around us, people either curious to see what’s happening or hoping for a fight.

_ Simple minded creatures... _

“Yeah, well as far as I’m concerned, ya nothing but a scrawny brat. Only reason yer in the big house ‘cause of yer group, ain’t it?”

_ Cause of my- bitch. _

“Bitch are you dumb, stupid, or really fucking dumb? You better use that microscopic brain of yours to choose your next words very,  _ very _ carefully, or else I’m afraid those muscles are going to be absolutely worthless when I nail your ass. Got that, or do I need to break it down even more for you to understand?” My voice has a bit of a growl to it as I don’t bother holding back my irritation.

I hear gasps and chuckles from the crowd, the sound partially hyping me up but also pissing me off. Like, do they not have anything better to do with their lives? I get we’re in a mafia, but damn. We’re a  _ mafia _ , not some street gang, we have more class than that. No fucking wonder they aren’t living in the mansion, damn brutes.

“Why you little-”

The man comes at me, but honestly all that muscle slows him down. It makes it easy for me to deflect his punch with one hand and use the other to punch his windpipe. He stumbles back from surprise, coughing profusely and gasping for air.

“C’mon, I didn’t even hit you that hard.” I state nonchalantly, checking my nails.

_ I think it’s time for a manicure. _

_ Should we ask Jimin to come with us? _

_ Yeah, he knows a really good nail salon. _

_ Maybe we can ask Mina to come, too. _

“Honestly, attacking someone without knowing who they are was a  _ stupid _ idea. No, it’s beyond stupid, especially if that person is above you.” I say, dropping my hand and looking at the struggling piggy in front of me.

“You- b-bitch!” The man chokes out.

I raise an eyebrow at the name, feeling my body slowly start to shake again in anger.

“A bitch?” I laugh loudly, almost doubling over in amusement. “We aren’t talking about your whore of a mother, sorry. We’re talking about me! Come on, don’t tell me you don’t know me.”

I pause for a moment, letting the tension sink in. During that moment the pig comes at me again. I grin devilishly, dodging his punch again and grabbing his shoulders, ramming my knee up between his legs. He shouts in pain, falling to his knees and I move my grip to his neck. I tighten my hands around his throat, giggling at the face he makes.

“Little piggies, I am your biggest nightmare! I am the thing you constantly run from, the monster haunting your dreams! I am the reaper to collect your souls! I am the king of hell, piggies, and you better believe that I  _ will _ drag every last one of your tainted souls to my kingdom for punishment!” I shout, eyes wide in excitement as I look out across the audience.

I let go of the man’s throat, ignoring his pathetic pleas as my hands behind his head. I tilt his face up to meet mine and bend over to stare him eye to eye.

“I am the devil, little piggy. Are you ready to face judgement?”

I straighten my back before slamming his head down at the same time I bring my knee up. I hear his nose crunch loudly from the impact and push his now limp body to the ground. I face the crowd again, a mischievous smile on my face and an evil glint in my eyes as I tug the collar of my shirt down, tilting my head to the side so everyone can see the rose tattoo on my neck.

“I am the Joker, the king of pandemonium, ruler of hell, and collector of souls.  _ I am your biggest fear _ .”

There are gasps and murmurs through the crowd. I let my collar go after a second and hold my arms out.

“Any objections?” I ask smugly.

“Wait a minute, you’re the sick bastard that killed Benny and Joohyeon!” Someone shouts.

“Sick? Well I do think I’m pretty dope, but a bastard? No, my parents were married when they had me. Can you say the same? Or is your dad still at the grocery store getting milk? But you’ll have to be more descriptive, I’ve killed a lot of people.”

“You son of a bitch!” Someone else hollers.

“That I am. My mother was a bitch.”

“You’re a monster!”

“Well, I prefer the name devil or Satan or even Joker, if you’re not religious, but I suppose that works too. But please use either Satan or Joker in my presence, thank you.”

“Somebody teach this piece of shit a lesson!”

“Oh, now we’re getting somewhere. Come on, then. Kill me if you think you can.”

Hell breaks loose after that, several people coming at me at once. I quickly assess the situation, still grinning as I dodge one person and push him into another. When the third person rushes me I aim a spinning heel kick at his head, slightly giggling as I spin.

“This is for fucking my girl!” One guy shouts, throwing a punch at me.

I easily deflect the blow, actually thinking about his words.  _ Fucked his girl? No, I only had sex with one girl, but another sucked my- oh. _ I laugh, turning to look at the man with a shit eating grin.

“Not my fault your girl’s always sucking on my dick. Ay, next time you go down on her clit, tell me how my dick tastes. Tell me how my motherfuckin’ dick tastes!” I roar in laughter, eyes gleaming as he overcomes with blinded rage.

Instead of waiting for him to attack first, I make my move. My fist collides with his gut, stopping him in his tracks, and I punch him in the abdomen again before throwing a punch at his face. His head swings to the side from the force of the hit and I take aim, roundhousing him in the head. He falls to the ground, and the next thing I know, several more people are coming at me. The fire in my veins burns to escape, and I have no problem letting it out. Everytime my fist or foot connects with its target, everytime I feel something break beneath my touch, every last drop of blood that spills from my opponents, all of it slowly satisfies my rage and bloodlust.

The violence both spurs me on and satiates me. All of the tension leaves my body, my mind finally becomes pacified. A breath of fresh air finally fills my lungs, my chest expanding as I intake oxygen. But all of it stops when a large, rough hand grips the back of my neck and harshly pulls me away from the fight. My body moves out of shock as my mind couldn’t understand what happened. All I know is that someone is pulling me along, holding me by the neck like a disobedient puppy. As soon as it finally clicks that someone is dragging me back to the mansion I start thrashing around.

“Get the fuck off of me!” I shout, actually looking at the person dragging me.

I wasn’t exactly prepared to see Jeongguk, his brows furrowed and lips set in a deep scowl as he turns to glare at me. I unconsciously let out a slight whimper, looking away from him but not quite staying still and letting him drag me around like a rag doll. We get to his office and immediately he slams me against the wall, but places his hand where my head would hit the wall as a cushion and I feel my bandana move because of it. He lets go of my neck and moves his hand from behind my head, placing both on either side of me and caging me in.

“What the fuck were you thinking?” He all but shouts, his voice a lot deeper and sharper than usual.

I try not to shiver as I look into his eyes, managing to slightly smirk.

“What? All I did was defend myself. They attacked me first. You gave me permission, remember?” I let out a small chuckle. “Don’t hate the player, hate the game. Not my fault I know how to play it.”

I push one of his arms out of the way, about to walk out when suddenly his hand wraps around my throat and squeezes, not cutting off oxygen but blood flow. He slams me back against the wall, again cushioning my head and moving my bandana in the process. He silently looks at me for a moment before I feel him squeezing my throat tighter.

“Nngh, harder daddy. Or do you prefer sir?” I manage to ask, both of my hands gripping at his arm.

“Will you be serious for one minute?” Jeongguk growls.

“Ooh, sorry, can’t. Sirius is dead. Bellatrix struck him and he fell through the veil thingy, remember?”

Jeongguk lets out a deep sigh, closing his eyes for a second before looking down at me again. He uses his free hand to grab a fistful of my hair, yanking my head back so I can meet his gaze and yet again moving my bandana around. I watch as he opens his mouth, about to say something, but he stops.

“What the fuck is on your head?” He questions, and then it’s my turn to stop.

“Nothing.” I answer maybe a bit too quickly.

I go to pull my bandana back in place, but Jeongguk quickly stops me, grabbing both of my hands and pinning them above my head with one hand. He releases my throat and I gasp for air, slightly unprepared when he takes off my bandana.

“What did you do to yourself?” He asks.

I flinch a bit when he runs his thumb over the bandage.

“Sorry,” He murmurs.

_ I don’t see why he doesn’t just knee him in the crotch and run away. _

_ The guy’s our boss. _

_ Okay and your point is? _

_ Do you think he’ll draw his knife? _

_ Nah. _

_ I think he’ll kiss him. I mean, the sexual tension around us is suffocating. _

“Oh my god I fucking hate you guys. Shut up.” I grumble, trying to keep from blushing at the last statement.

“So that’s it. It’s the demons.” Jeongguk says, taking me off guard as I was busy trying to get everyone to be quiet for a minute.

“Huh? N-no, it’s not.”  _ Ooh hoo hoo, he’s getting flustered~ _ “Well, it is, but it’s not just them and-”  _ Look at him all shy, _ “fuck-”  _ Imagine if he actually kissed him. _ “Would you just be quiet for two minutes?”  _ Hey, how’d you hurt your head? _ “I hit my head on the shower wall repeatedly. You were there you dumb fuck. Wait, shit, I wasn’t supposed to say that outloud.”

Hands gently cup my face and I try to focus on Jeongguk who gives me a slightly worried look, but my attention keeps going back to the mess in my brain.

“Hey, Tae, look at me. Focus on me, just me, okay?” Jeongguk says softly.

_ Oooh, eye contact. _

_ I’d bottom so hard for him. _

_ Fuck that, I wanna power bottom. _

_ At least we all agree there ain’t no way we’d top. _

_ Just look at him. He’s 10000% daddy material. _

_ Pretty sure he has a ‘sir’ kink, though. _

“Tae, you’re not looking at me. I need you to look at me. Focus only on me.” Jeongguk interrupts their conversation.

“Can’t, too loud.” I respond.

“Yes you can. You don’t need to shut them up, just ignore them, okay?”

I nod slightly, wincing when one of the voices yells out a violent “ _ Hey _ ”. Jeongguk gently caresses my cheeks and I make myself maintain eye contact and ignore everything other than the older.

“Why did you hit your head on the shower wall?” Jeongguk asks softly.

I shrug. “They wouldn’t shut up. My head hurt a lot. And I was really really angry.”

“Because of the demons?”

I shake my head. “I just get angry sometimes for no reason. I get these bouts of intense emotions, most of the time it’s either anger or sadness. Everyone doesn’t really talk so much like this when I have one of these moments, but sometimes they do and it makes everything worse. I try to stop them, to push them away, but it just backfires and hurts even more.”

Jeongguk nods thoughtfully. “How are you right now? Still angry?”

“Yeah, but not too bad like earlier.”

“Okay. Did you hurt yourself anywhere else?”

“Yeah, I punched the mirror in my bathroom and cut my fist.”

Jeongguk nods again. “Next time you have one of these moments, tell me, okay? Or tell Nam-”

“No. Don’t tell him. Don’t tell any of my hyungs. Please.”

Jeongguk gives me a questioning look at my pleading. I love my hyungs but if they know that I’m having “mini spikes” they’ll lock me in my room. They say it’s to keep everyone, including me safe, but it hurts me so much. I have panic attacks and my mind spirals even more out of control and I can never seem to breathe. I know they really think they’re helping me, and for a while I thought it was helping, too, but it only makes things worse.

“Okay, I won’t tell them. But come to me whenever you feel one of the episodes coming, alright? I’ll do my best to help you through it without hurting yourself or anyone else. And the next time your rage gets too much and you need something to aim it at, go to the cellar and pick a prisoner - not my men, okay?” Jeongguk tells me.

I nod and Jeongguk reaches up to ruffle my hair.

“Good boy.”


	22. 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "Dreams do come true", but nightmares are dreams, too.

_ Taehyung _

Jeongguk lets me stay in his office with him for the rest of the day. There wasn’t really much to do, but it was better than being a whole ass wild card outside. He closed the blinds and curtains for me after I told him the light makes my head hurt more and left only a lamp on. It’s not too bright, but enough to see around the room. The rest of my rage episode passed sometime after dinner, I still get small fits of annoyance randomly but for the most part I’m back to me.

_ Haha, wildcard. Get it? Cause we’re the Joker? _

_ Dude, it’s not funny when you explain it. _

And then there’s the fact that no one has shut up yet.

_ Fuck off. You love us. _

“Not you. You’re a shit head. You bet fifty dollars on me, you jackass.” I grumble, still upset about the bets.

I sit, curled up on one of the chairs across Jeongguk’s desk. The latter works on something on his computer, completely focussed. He doesn’t mind as I respond to the voices aloud, he even sometimes asks about our conversations and adds his own comments.

_ Hey! In my defense, I really thought you would’ve exploded. _

“Yeah, well you thought wrong. Can’t believe you bet  _ against _ me. How the hell are you going to bet money anyways? My money  _ is _ your money, so technically it’s all going to me.”

_ Oh shut it, you firecracker. _

“Make me, you easy bake oven.”

A snort makes me look up, and I watch as Jeongguk chuckles.

“Easy bake oven? Really?” He asks once he calms down.

A small smile is on his lips, an amused twinkle in his eyes. I shrug slightly, biting my lip.

“He’s an ass. He placed a bet against me.” I say quietly.

“Oh really? What was the bet about?”

“Whether or not I’d snap at breakfast and how long it’d take me to do so.”

“Did anyone win?”

“No. They all said I’d punch or stab someone, maybe both, or that I’d only last ten or twenty minutes, no in between.”

“You lasted a good fifteen or sixteen minutes and made a peaceful, yet dramatic, exit.”

“Leave me alone, I was having an episode, okay?”

“I know, I didn’t mean to offend you or make you upset.”

“It’s okay, you didn’t.”

He gives me a small smile before going back to whatever he was working on.

“Ggukie?” I call out after a few minutes.

“Yes?”

“You’re sure that my hyungs won’t know about the fight, right?” I asked that he not only not tell my hyungs about my episode, but that I also got into trouble because of it.

“Yes, Tae. Only Mark, JB, and Bambam were with me when we got to you and I made sure to tell them to not tell your hyungs.”

“Okay… Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.”

I curl more into my seat after that, using my jacket as a blanket as I close my eyes.

“Tae,” Jeongguk calls softly as I’m about to fall asleep.

“Hmm?”

“Come here.”

I open my eyes, pouting some as I don’t want to move. But when I see that the older has his chair pushed back and arms open for me I hop up, smiling giddily as I plop myself across Jeongguk’s lap. My legs are bunched up in the chair and I hold onto Jeongguk’s hoodie, resting my head against his shoulder. I close my eyes again as Jeongguk wraps my jacket around me and fall asleep, listening to the quiet  _ click clack _ of computer keys and inhaling Jeongguk’s scent. I wake up sometime after when Jeongguk brings me to my room and helps me change into pajamas.

I wanted him to stay with me, but he told me he still has some things to take care of. Too tired to complain, I let him tuck me into bed and play with my hair until I fall back to sleep. But my sleep is short lived as I bolt awake in the middle of the night, gasping for air. My body is drenched in sweat and trembles, my mind trying to shake off phantom hands. My throat constricts, preventing air from reaching my lungs, and tears collect in my eyes. Shadows become demons lurking in the dark and the hands around my body squeeze and bind me, moving to places I don’t want them.

_ I had a nightmare. _

I stumble out of bed, knocking into objects and tripping on nothing as I fumble to open the door. My mind is seized with terror, unable to work properly because of the nightmare I can’t seem to remember now that I’m awake. Unaware of the tears falling down my face and panting heavily, I find Namjoon’s room and twist the doorknob. My heart stops when it doesn’t open and suddenly the walls are closing in on me and the hall is spinning.

“No,” I murmur. “No no no no no no no no.”

I go to Yoongi’s door next, trying to open it but yet again it’s locked. I slightly choke on a sob, trying the rest of my hyung’s doors but all of them are locked.

“No, why are you locked?” I cry after I find even Hobi hyung’s door is locked.

I lean against the wall crying softly and trying to scratch the hands off of my body. Struggling to breathe, my feet slowly begin to move of their own accord. I use the wall to keep myself balanced as I slightly stumble from time to time. Sometimes I stop, unable to keep going but I have to force myself to move, trying to ignore my fear. My shaking fingers eventually wrap around cool metal and I lean against the door, quietly wishing that the door will open. I nearly cry in happiness when it does and I somewhat tumble inside the dark bedroom.

However, my still lingering fear overrides that glee and I manage to shut the door before diving under the covers next to the sleeping male. The scent of cinnamon immediately begins to soothe me as I wiggle my way under Jeongguk’s arm, said male sleeping on his stomach and using his arms as cushions. He starts to wake up once I lay my head against his shoulder, hands shaking against his bare side.

“Tae?” He groggily calls out.

I don’t respond, instead pressing my body more against him, trying to escape the hands on me. Jeongguk begins to move, his movements slightly hindered as I cling to him. Eventually he manages to flip onto his back, holding me against his chest.

“What’s wrong, bun?” He asks gently, one hand rubbing my back and the other running through my hair.

“W-wan’ them o-off.” I say through my tears, scratching at my stomach and legs from time to time.

“Want what off, baby?”

“H-hands. They w-won’ s-stop to-ouching me.”

“Only I’m touching you, bun.”

I shake my head, choking on another sob as I scratch my thigh. Jeongguk grabs my hand, stopping my scratching, and then tilts my face to meet his.

“Go ahead and look, bun. I’m the only one touching you. There’s no one else. Just me.” He says.

My lower lip wobbles as I try to hold in my tears, sniffling a bit.

“B-but I can s-still feel t-them.” I mumble.

Jeongguk carefully cups my face, using his thumbs to wipe my tears even though more just replace them.

“Whatever used to be there is gone now, okay? It can’t hurt you anymore. And if anything or anyone ever tries to hurt you, you have six strong ass hyungs to protect you.” He tells me.

“S-six?”

He gives me a small smile. “Yeah, I’m your hyung, afterall, aren’t I?”

More tears well in my eyes at that and I immediately hug Jeongguk, burying my face in his chest.

“Thank you, Ggukie.” My voice comes at slightly muffled, but nonetheless Jeongguk wraps his arms around me, hugging me to his body.

“You’re welcome, bun. Now get some sleep, yeah?”

I nod and close my eyes, feeling safe and protected as I fall asleep in Jeongguk’s arms with not a worry or fear in mind.

  
  


\---

_ Jeongguk _

I watch Taehyung fall asleep on my chest, gently massaging his scalp as his breathing slows and evens out. I frown deeply, wondering just what the hell happened to him.  _ He must’ve had a nightmare, but what was it about? Was it about something that actually happened to him? _ Still, the look of pure fear and terror on Taehyung’s tear stricken face is embedded in my memory.  _ I never want to see him like this again. _ After a while of making sure Taehyung’s okay and not about to wake up again, I finally go back to sleep, keeping Taehyung close to me.

I wake up long before Taehyung does, facing the younger as he lays next to me, his body perfectly melding against mine. His face is nuzzled against my chest, cheeks squished and lips parted as he pulls me closer in his sleep. I quietly fawn over his adorableness, my hand reaching up to tangle in his hair. I softly play with his golden locks as he sleeps, not bothering to get up and get dressed for the day. Some time after I’ve woken up, Tae slowly starts to come to, nose scrunching up slightly before his eyes flutter open.

They almost immediately shut again, his mouth opening wide as he yawns. A cute squeak leaves his lips and he licks his lips, opening his eyes again. Watching as he gradually gains his bearings, I continue to lightly run my hands in his hair, my other hand slips up his shirt, skimming along the expanse of his back. The younger mewls quietly against my touch, shuffling closer to me. I chuckle at his actions and rest my hand in the dip of his waist.

“You awake, bun?” I ask.

Taehyung nods, his hand reaching up to rub his eyes. He lets his hand fall and merely lays there, eyes staring blankly at my chest and pouting some.

“Do you want to talk about it?” I question, referring to what happened last night.

He shrugs. “Can’t remember.” He mumbles.

“What do you mean.”

“Can’t remember the dream. Just what I felt.”

“What did you feel?”

“Weak. I felt weak, and I hated it. The fear wasn’t even the worst of it, I was scared because I was weak. I couldn’t stop anything.”

“Now what do you feel?”

“Determined.”

“To do what?”

“Become stronger.”

_ He doesn’t let his fears control him. He uses them as motivation, to improve himself. _ I sit up, Taehyung rising with me as we’re still basically holding onto each other.

“Also, um, I’m sorry about bothering you like this. I tried going to my hyung’s rooms but their doors were locked, for some reason.” Taehyung tells me.

I slightly furrow my brows, confused as to why their doors were loc-  _ oh.... That’s right. _

“Shit, I forgot about that.” I say to myself, but due to our close proximity Taehyung hears me.

“Forgot about what?”

“Your rooms, along with some others, used to be file rooms when I was a kid, and the doors could only be opened from the inside, you had to have a key in order to get in from the outside. We used magnets over the slot on the inner panel to keep it from locking. A few years ago we moved everything and the rooms became vacant. I thought we changed them all, but apparently not. I’ll have someone handle it soon.”

Taehyung’s mouth slightly falls open as he lets out an “ohhhh”.

“That makes sense.” He says. “Should we get ready for the day?”

“I guess. We have work to do.”

“Do we?”

I nod. “The scouts should be back sometime today or tomorrow. I want you and Namjoon reviewing the information with me.”

The younger points to himself. “Me?”

I chuckle at his wide, shocked eyes. “That’s what I said, isn’t it? There’s something else I want you to do, but I’ll save it for later. Do you want to go to your room to change?”

“Actually, can I wear some of your clothes? I don’t feel like going back right now.”

“Sure. Go ahead and take a shower, I’ll find you something to wear.”

He nods and hops off the bed, not falling this time. He soon disappears behind the bathroom door and I get up, making the bed. The sound of the shower running plays in the background as I finish making the bed and find some of my older, smaller clothes that should fit Taehyung. While waiting for Taehyung to get out, I go through my notifications and see what I have to do today. When I see a message from not just Namjoon, but Jin and Yoongi as well, asking where Taehyung is and if I’ve seen or heard from him, I quickly respond and let them know he’s been with me for half the night.

I don’t tell them why, though, not knowing if Taehyung wants them to know about his nightmare or not. I just tell them that we’ll be down in a few minutes. I hear the bathroom door open sometime later and put my phone down, looking up at Taehyung. His hair is soaking wet, as if he didn’t bother to dry it, and water drips down his face and neck. He pushes his hair back, revealing his bold eyebrows and forehead.  _ He looks older with his hair pushed back _ . A towel is wrapped tightly around his hips, his skin shimmering slightly from water.

“Gguk, do you have vaseline?” He asks me.

“Yeah, it’s behind the mirror.”

“Okay, and do you have a spare toothbrush?”

“Same place as the vaseline.”

“Alright, thanks.”

“No problem.”

He goes back into the bathroom, leaving the door open. When he comes back out I head in and take a shower, not taking a long time. Taehyung sits cross-legged on the bed, playing with the hem of my shirt that’s still too big on him. His hair is mostly dried and falls in front of his face again, and he looks up at me with innocent eyes as I step out of the bathroom. He watches as I pick an outfit from my closet, but looks away as I change. I do my hair and brush my teeth after changing, then head back into the bedroom.

“Are you ready to go?” I ask him after I put my phone in my pocket.

Taehyung nods and holds his arms out to me. I pick him up, making sure he’s comfortable before leaving the room. He’s quiet the entire walk to the kitchen, playing with the hair at the nape of my neck the whole time.

“Are you okay, Tae?” I question, not used to him being so quiet.

He shrugs. “I guess so.” He answers softly.

We reach the kitchen, neither of us quite minding the chaos ensuing.  _ At least they aren’t throwing pots and pans around _ . Taehyung’s head perks up some as I head to the island, the younger looking around.

“Papa!” He calls out, reaching out an arm.

Namjoon comes over to us, a worried look on his face. Taehyung turns back to me, giving me a quick, tight hug.

“Thank you, Ggukie.” He tells me before allowing Namjoon to pull him from my arms.

They walk away, talking in hushed whispers. I watch them for a moment before grabbing a cup of coffee and sitting at the dining table. I do a double take, realizing Eunae is beside me, and I finally start to wonder where the hell she’s been the past few days.  _ She can never stay in one place too long, anyways. _

“Gguk, is he wearing your clothes?” Eunae asks, staring intensely at Taehyung, said male sitting on the counter with Namjoon directly in front of him.

“Yes.” I respond, also staring at Taehyung.

“Did he spend the night with you again?” Jackson questions.

I nod. “Something came up last night and he ended up staying with me.”

I raise an eyebrow when I see Namjoon lean in and peck Taehyung on the lips, the smaller slightly shocked before he smiles and giggles.

“Kiss kiss,” He cutely says before cupping Namjoon’s cheeks and pecking him back.

Taehyung squeals as Namjoon peppers kisses all over his face and practically bounces on the counter.

“Hey! No fair! I want a kiss, too!” Jimin says from the other side of the kitchen.

Taehyung laughs and holds out his arms to his silver haired hyung.

“Chim Chim, kiss kiss.” He says.

Jimin immediately speeds over and pecks Taehyung’s lips. Taehyung giggles, clapping his hands excitedly. The only thing running in my mind is how adorable Taehyung is.

“Soo, they just kiss each other?” Jackson asks no one in particular.

“No, we just kiss Taehyung.” A wild Yoongi answers.

_ Seriously, where the fuck does he come from? _

The white haired male is still wearing his pajamas and cradles a coffee cup in his hands, taking sips every now and then.

“It’s all platonic, of course, and it makes Tae happy, especially when he’s not feeling his best.” He explains.

“That’s actually kind of cute.” Mark says, gaining some agreements.

“It’s disgusting.” That one comment was loud enough for everyone to hear, and immediately everything stops.

We all turn to look at Yugyeom who has a disgusted look on his face. Before anyone says anything, Taehyung jumps off of the counter and looks around.

“Damn, what a shame. I can’t seem to find where the fuck we asked for your opinion.” He snaps, glaring at Yugyeom.

Yugyeom scoffs and rolls his eyes. “There’s a little something called ‘freedom of speech’, if you didn’t know. I can say what I want.”

"I don't know what your problem is, but I'm guessing it's hard to pronounce."

"Not really, but it does leave a bad taste on my tongue,  _ Taehyung _ ."

I notice Taehyung’s group slowly inching closer to the blonde as Taehyung’s lips form into a straight line, slightly twitching from time to time, and his usually bright eyes begin to darken.

“You know, you’ve been a real fucking bitch to me ever since we met, so instead of being a petty ass bastard - rolling your eyes, talking back, and getting your panties in a twist all the time - why don’t you man up for once and fucking face me? Why the fuck do you have such an attitude with me all the time? And God so help me, if you give me a stupid ass answer, meeting me won’t be the only thing you’ll regret.” Taehyung’s voice is much lower and rougher than usual, his words coming out as a growl.

Yugyeom snorts, attempting to glare at Taehyung but it’s nothing compared to the stare the younger is giving him.

“Why do I have an attitude with you? Because you’re a fucking monster who pretends to be some innocent child. Monsters like you don’t belong here.”

The entire room is silent. The atmosphere, on the other hand, changes drastically to something much more darker and suffocating. Taehyung’s face is eerily blank, his entire body stops moving. You can’t even see his chest moving from breathing. It all changes in a split second, however, when Taehyung lunges at Yugyeom, pure murder written across his face. Everyone jumps up at his sudden movements which are stopped by all of his hyungs holding him back. His eyes are near completely black and I catch sight of a vein popping out on his neck.

“Shit, he’s spiking.” I hear Yoongi grunt out right as Taehyung momentarily breaks free.

“You think you’ve seen a monster! I’ll fucking show you what a real monster is!” Taehyung shouts, nearly escaping his hyungs a few times.

A crazed look glosses over his eyes as he lets out a maniacal laugh, ripping one of his arms free and managing to take a few steps forward before Hoseok grabs onto him again. I stand in slight shock for a moment, not knowing where his sudden strength came from.  _ I knew he was strong, but shit. He’s giving all of his hyungs a hard time and all they’re doing is holding him back _ .

“See! I told you he was a monster!” Yugyeom yells, making Taehyung laugh again as he almost breaks free once more.

I look at Yugyeom, frowning in annoyance and distaste. I make my way to him, no one quite paying attention as they’re all watching Taehyung unravel. It isn’t until I grab Yugyeom by the back of his hair, yanking him to look at me that some start turning away from Taehyung. Yugyeom lets out a yelp as I pull his hair, and I see him visibly gulp, eyes full of fear as I glare at him.

“Don’t you  _ ever _ speak that way about Taehyung again, do you understand me?” I snarl. “How dare you call him a monster when  _ everyone _ in this room, including  _ you _ , has done some fucked up shit in order to survive - to get on top? Every last one of us in here has blood on their hands, so who the hell are you to judge him and call him a monster? Don’t get fucking pissy with Taehyung because he had to do a lot more to survive because at the end of the day he’s still stronger than anyone else in this room. You really think he could live in this life and come out unscathed? I bet if anyone else went through what he has they would have never survived.

“Not me, not you, not anyone else in this room. But he did, and it’s made him into one of the most talented people I have ever met. So the next time you decide to call him a monster, I’d suggest you not only think about what he’s been through, but what he can do to you. It’s like he said, it’s not the man who was born a monster you should be afraid of, it’s the man who was forced to become one.”

I drag Yugyeom away after that, pushing him out of the room.

“Get out of my sight. I don’t want to see you for the rest of the day.” I say before going back into the kitchen. “The rest of you get out as well.”

Eunae is the first to leave the room, followed by Bambam and the rest of the group. All that’s left is a seething Taehyung and his group still struggling to hold him back. I make my way to them, cautiously eyeing Taehyung.

“We need to get him out of here before he fully slips into his headspace.” Jin tells me.

“Can I try something first?” I ask, not looking away from Taehyung.

“What is it?”

“I just want to talk to him.”

“Good luck with that.” Jimin says. “Kid hears nothing besides screams and begging when he’s like this.”

“I just need five minutes.”

“C’mon guys, let him try. We all did the first time we each saw him spike.” Hoseok announces.

“Hoseok’s right. Taehyung completed his process which means he has a good chance of getting through to him already.” Namjoon vouches.

“Make it quick! It’s getting harder to hold him.” Yoongi says.

I nod and approach Taehyung, carefully wrapping my arms around his waist and holding tightly. The younger struggles against me as I lean my head down, speaking directly into his ear.

“Taehyung, I need you to calm down for m-”

“Calm down? You want  _ me _ to calm down-”

“I want you to  _ listen _ , not  _ talk _ .”

“Give me one good reason why I should listen to you.”

“Because I know that you are more than this. You may not allow people to look down on you but you won’t let it take control of you either. Do you know how I know this? I know because you are strong, Taehyung. Stronger than Yugyeom, stronger than your hyungs, and stronger than the demons in your mind trying to control you right now. You can beat them, Taehyung, don’t let them hurt you anymore. This is  _ your _ body,  _ your _ mind,  _ you _ control them, not the other way around. I know you’re strong enough to fight them, you just need to know it, too.”

Taehyung stops fighting some, yet his body still shakes violently. I hear him make small grunts and whines of discomfort, his hands coming to clutch at my arms.

“‘M, ‘m strong…” I hear him mumble.

“You’re strong.” I repeat.

“I’m strong…”

I glance up at Namjoon, mouthing ‘let him go’ to him. He gives me an unsure look but I just nod, letting him know it’s alright. He slowly lets go of Taehyung, the blonde not rushing at the chance to escape. He just continues to hold onto me, his unbridled rage causing him to tremble. The others give Namjoon a shocked and confused look, but he just motions for them to let Taehyung go as well. One by one they step away from Taehyung, watching in amazement as he doesn’t attack anyone or run.

“N-need t-to- I n-need to-” Taehyung quietly stutters, beginning to scratch at my arms.

“Angry?” I ask gently to which he nods. “Okay, I’ll get you to the cellar.” I look back at Namjoon. “I’m going to take him to get rid of his anger.”

Namjoon just nods, still shocked that Taehyung hasn’t spazzed out by now. With that, I carefully take Taehyung down to the cellars, the younger shaking and scratching my arm the entire way.


	23. 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bloodshed pacifies him, he's a walking paradox.

_ Jeongguk _

We nearly make it to the basement when Taehyung stops, clutching his head and grunting slightly.

“Tae?” I call out, not wanting to startle him.

“P-pick so-omeone f-for me. ‘M g-going to m-my worksh-shop. C-can’t m-make it th-there and b-back.” He manages to say through gritted teeth.

“Do you want me to escort you?”

He doesn’t answer right away. He takes a few steps away from me, squeezing his eyes shut.

“N-no. M-m-might a-ac-c-accidentally s-strangle you. I’ll b-be f-fine.” He stutters.

He doesn’t give me a chance to respond, turning on his heel and walking away. I watch him until he disappears around the corner, feeling worried about him but figuring he knows himself best and knows what he needs to do. After glancing one last time in the direction Taehyung walked off in, I continue my way to the cellars, walking faster than usual.

“Keys.” I say to one of the guards once I enter the dark, dingy space.

He hands them to me without question, resuming his previous position as I look for a target for Tae.  _ Most of them are starving and half dead, nothing fun enough for him. _ I stop in front of the cell of our more recent prisoners, deeming them good enough to satisfy Tae’s bloodlust. I unlock the cell, some of the occupants looking up at me with either empty, fearful, or disgusted eyes. I grab a random man, pulling him up by his chained wrists. He shouts in surprise, attempting to break free from me but I’m much stronger than he is.

I drag him out of the cell and make sure to lock it behind me and toss the keys back to the guard on my way out, keeping the prisoner's key to his chains in my pocket. The entire way to Taehyung’s workshop the male tries to escape me, slowly ticking me off. I was happy when I reached his workshop, not only to get rid of this annoying man but also to make sure Taehyung is okay. I hear classical music playing before I even open the door, the music melancholic and haunting. The red lights don’t bother me as I walk inside, in fact, it rather induces a sense of tranquility. Taehyung sits on the floor against the wall opposite of the door, hands cradling his bowed head.

He doesn’t look up as I enter, but after I’ve shut the door and taken a few steps forward. He slowly lifts his head, his face void of any emotion and lips set in a straight line. I give him a worried look, but he just stares at the struggling man I hold. He rises to his feet, arms falling to his sides. I can’t help the rising anticipation in me when he slowly walks over, footsteps completely silent. He stares at the prisoner for a while, the male quieting down in apprehension. A low growling sound resonates from the back of his throat right before his hand flies up to his head, gripping his hair. His chest rises and falls deeply as he pants for air, eyes aimed at the ground.

“T-thank y-yo-ou.” His voice is strained, as if it’s taking all of his strength just to speak.

He slowly looks at me, and for a moment I can see  _ Taehyung _ , not the demons plaguing him. But then his eyes become blank again, his hand falling to his side, and in a swift movement, he grabs the prisoner from my hands and pushes him onto his operating table. The man screams out as Taehyung straddles his thighs, wrapping his hand around the man’s throat as he pins him to the table. I carefully watch him, taking the key from my pocket and coming to his side. Taehyung mumbles something as I come closer and I lean into him, unable to hear over the screams.

“What was that?” I ask him.

“S-s-s-stra-aps.” He whispers.

“Straps? Where?”

“T-t-table.”

I look down at the sides of the table, finding straps to lock arms, legs, and body in place. I strap the man’s legs down first, then his abdomen, and then I unlock his cuffs. Immediately the man begins to flail his arms around, trying to hit or grab anything. Taehyung quickly lets go of his neck and holds him down long enough for me to strap his arms to the table. Once he’s tied in place, Taehyung slides off of him, slightly staggering as he goes to where his medical instruments are. My eyes widen when he nearly falls and I quickly rush to his side, my hands wrapping around his waist.

“Tae?” I gently call out.

He looks up at me, eyes drifting between blank and emotive.  _ He’s slipping into that headspace, but he’s trying to fight it. _ I move my hand to cup his face, gently keeping him from turning away.

“Hey, bun, stay here with me, okay? You can do this, you can fight it.” I softly encourage him.

“‘M...‘m t-t-try-ing.” He utters before a sharp cry has him squeezing his eyes shut, hand flying up to cradle his head. “N-n-need t-to s-sh-shut him u-up.”

I let him go as he gathers his supplies, and sets it up, slightly jerking his head to the side from time to time. I walk to where I can clearly see Taehyung’s face and lean against the desk behind me.

“W-w-what are you doing with that? N-no! Get that away from me! Let me go!” The man screams as Taehyung threads black string through a needle.

Taehyung climbs on top of the other, ignoring his screams and pleas as he begins to pierce his lower lip with the needle. It just barely makes it halfway through the flesh, the man screaming bloody murder, when Taehyung stops.

“Bloody hell, do you ever shut up?! I can’t even sew your mouth shut with all of your screaming.” He complains loudly, voice raspy and gruff.

“Then find another way to silence him.” I suggest, crossing my arms across my chest.

I see the cogs turning in Taehyung’s head, the contemplation in his eyes slowly turning into realization and then excitement. He lets out a gleeful giggle, excitedly clapping his hands. It was a little strange, not his excitement but that he seemed to actually pay attention, his eyes focussing some.

“Y-yes, yes o-of c-course! Good th-thinking, G-ggukie! A-all I h-have to d-do is r-remove his v-vocal ch-chords!” He shouts.

“W-w-wait, n-no! Sto-”

“O-oh, and I m-might as w-well s-sew your m-mouth shut, t-too, since I a-already st-started. I g-guess I-I’ll do th-that last.”

Taehyung has a whistle on his lips, harmonizing with the music playing as he pulls the needle out and switches it out for a scalpel. His eyes have that slightly faraway look in them, as if it’s not him who’s really here.

“You have medical experience?” I ask Taehyung.

He has one hand pressing the man’s head down in place and the other handling the scalpel, the instrument already slicing open his throat.

“H-huh? Oh, y-yeah, some.” He stays focussed for a moment before I see him drifting away again.

_ So if I can keep him talking I can keep him here. _

“Where’d you learn?” I question, referring to his medical abilities.

“Jin’s m-mom was a g-general s-surgeon. S-s-she t-taught some us s-some things. R-rest was.....trial and e-error.” It was even more interesting, watching as he manages to front again, he’s hands working on autopilot as he does what he needs to.

“Jin still has his parents?”

“N-no, killed ‘em b-before we l-left. H-he did, a-anyways. I w-wanted to, h-hated ‘em both s-s-so much. B-b-but they w-were h-hyung’s d-demons t-to face.”

“Why’d you hate them?”

“M-m-manip-pulative b-bastards. M-man was a-arrogant, c-cocky, s-s-selfish. E-emotionally abusive, t-too, s-sometimes p-physically as w-well. H-his mom w-was a s-straight up b-bitch,” He pauses and I watch as he pulls something out of the now quiet man’s throat, tossing it into a metal bowl. “S-she w-was conceited l-like her h-husband. C-cared m-more about w-wealth th-than her p-patients. A s-slut, t-too.”

He trades the scalpel for a suture needle and thread, wiping his hands on a towel first.

“Is he still alive?” I ask.

“Hm? Oh, y-yeah, a-about t-to pa-pass out f-from the p-pain, though. C-can you a-actually get th-the, um, s-syringe a-and v-vial?”

“Where is it?”

He quickly points to his side table before continuing to sew the man’s throat close. I pick up the syringe placed next to his other instruments and the only vial there as well.

“F-fill it t-to the, th-the um, 0.5 m-millil-liter m-marking.” Tae instructs.

I do as he says and set the filled syringe back on the table, moving back to my original spot as Taehyung finishes his suture. Once he’s done, he picks up the syringe, finding a vein in the man’s arm before injecting the syringe and whatever the hell was inside of it. A few seconds later and the man is as energetic as ever.  _ What did he give him? _ Taehyung picks up his knife, a little twinkle in his eyes, and starts ripping off the other’s shirt, whistling again.

“What are you going to do now?” I question.

“H-have fun. M-might just e-evis-scerate him, h-haven’t dec-cided. I-I’ll p-plan it a-as I g-go.”

I try to keep him talking as much as possible, our conversation ranging between random things. I bring up old topics and new ones, anything to keep him talking, and smile to myself when he stutters less and less and responds more quickly, not having to take time to form his words. When he’s finished having fun, covered in blood and the body beneath him mutilated beyond recognition (and yes, the mouth is sewn shut), I walk with him back to his room to get cleaned and rest, making sure to have someone clean up the aftermath as we go.

“How are you feeling?” Is the first thing I ask once he exits the bathroom, a big, fluffy towel wrapped around his body.

“A lot better, I suppose. Still very pissed at Yugyeom, but I get it, I guess.”

“No, what Yugyeom said was uncalled for and very hypocritical given our line of work. He had no place saying those things to you, and for what it’s worth, I’m sorry he did.”

Taehyung shakes his head, turning to his dresser.

“Don’t be. You stood up for me, didn’t you? Thank you for that.” He says.

“You heard me?”  _ But didn’t Jimin say- _

“I didn’t fully enter the spike. Contrary to what Jimin said, I could still see and hear and somewhat feel what was happening around me, I just couldn’t move and it was hard to talk.”

“Oh…”

There’s silence as Taehyung dresses himself in just underwear and an oversized hoodie, one I recognize to be mine.

“You took my hoodie?”

“I took a handful of your clothes. Oh, well, an armful. Do you want them back?”

“No, you can keep them.”

“Thanks.”

“Mhm.”

Taehyung disposes of his towel and sits on the corner of his bed, facing me as I sit in the chair.

“Jeongguk, no one’s ever talked me out of a spike before. I don’t really get how it happened, or why I calmed down just by listening to you, but you grounded me. Thank you.” He tells me.

“You’re welcome. But, I have a question.”

“Yes?”

“Is it that easy to send you into a spike? Calling you by a specific name?”

He shakes his head. “No. It’s not necessarily the word itself, but why and how it’s said, if that makes sense. Yugyeom said it out of pure disgust and hatred of me. If we’re fighting or playing video games and you call me a monster I won’t spike. Is that confusing? I feel like it was.”

“No, it wasn’t. I get it.”

“Good. Also, because of my rage episode yesterday and my nightmare I wasn’t exactly mentally prepared to try and prevent myself from snapping.”

“Oh, I see.”

“Mm, well, I’m going to take a nap and train when I wake up.”

“I’ll start preparing things for when the scouts arrive. I’ll be in my office if you need me.”

“Don’t stay up too late.”

“I won’t. Make sure you don’t overexert yourself while training.”

“I will.”

I leave the room after that, heading to my office and getting files for the scouts to fill out ready. I also take care of a few shipment orders and make sure everything is in place and working the way it should be. A couple of hours soon pass by, lunchtime just about passing when someone knocks on my door.

“Come in.”

The door opens and Namjoon walks in. I was a little surprised to see the older, not remembering having any work to give him or vice versa. But then Tae’s near spike pops up in my head and I figure he might want to talk about that.

“How’s work going?” Namjoon asks once he sits down.

“Same as always, I suppose. Time consuming and draining, but necessary. Have you checked up on Tae already?”

He hums slightly. “Just caught him before he left for the gym. He’s a lot better compared to this morning even before the slip. I’m glad he’s in control again, he had me worried. It hasn’t been too long since his last spike, another one so soon would be bad.”

I nod, understanding the situation. “I’m glad he was able to fight it. But I assume that’s what you’re here about, isn’t it?”

“You are correct. Taehyung has never calmed himself from a spike.  _ We’ve _ never calmed him from a spike.”

“He told me that.”

“So how did you?”

I shrug. “I told him that he was strong enough to fight it off. It’s his body, his mind, he controls what happens, not the other way around.”

Namjoon raises an eyebrow. “You told him he was strong enough.”

I nod again. “This morning, when we woke up, Tae and I talked about his nightmare. Well, we talked about what he could remember. He told me that he was scared because he knew he was too weak to fight whatever was hurting him, and that it made him want to become stronger to defeat them. But he also told me before that for you all, your demons were once alive but now only live inside your head. Taehyung is no doubt strong, he was strong enough to defeat his physical demons, but his nightmare made him believe otherwise. I figured he just needed to be reminded that he is strong, so that’s what I told him. I don’t think that Tae has low self esteem, I know he’s rather proud of who he is, but I think that once in a while he needs to be reminded that he’s more than enough, and he’s stronger than he thinks.”

Namjoon says nothing, just looks at me with a small smile and a bit of a twinkle in his eyes. Without notice, he stands up and fixes his tie and shirt.

“Thank you for looking out for Taehyung. Oh, and before I forget, Taehyung wants me to tell you to take a break for lunch. He knows you’ve been working since he went to sleep.” He tells me.

I smile slightly, a light laugh escaping me.

“Will do, and it was no problem at all.” I reply.

With one last farewell Namjoon leaves and a few minutes later I take a break and grab something to eat. The rest of the day passes rather uneventfully, and by eleven I’m in bed and falling asleep. A few hours later, however, and I’m waking up as a small body wraps around mine, small yet fast pants of air hitting my chest. My arms automatically envelope the other, hands tangling in hair and softly playing with the ends.

“Another nightmare, bun?” I ask, looking down at Taehyung.

He doesn’t cry, but an eerily blank look covers his eyes, his lower lip trapped between his teeth as he harshly chews at the flesh, and his body slightly shakes. He nods at my question, snuggling closer to me. His head is slightly angled upwards to mine, so I can see the tears slowly build in his eyes. Frowning to myself, I try to calm the other down by rubbing his back, continuing to play with his hair, whispering sweet things to him, but nothing seems to work.  _ How the hell do I calm him down? Is there anything he’s told me that makes him feel better? Maybe something his hyungs have done to cheer him up? _

And that’s when I think of it.  _ Shit...will it really work? His hyungs did it, but I don’t know if it’ll have the same effect if I do it. Will he even be okay with it? I don’t wanna do it and he becomes uncomfortable or he just gets even worse. _ It’s worth a shot, though. If it doesn’t work, I’ll take him to Namjoon. Content with my plan, I move my hand from Tae’s hair to his face, my other hand resting on the dip of his waist. I gently tug his lip from between his teeth and, before Tae can do anything, dip my head down and plant my lips on top of his.

It only lasts for a second, and soon I’m pulling away, gauging Tae’s reaction. His eyebrows are furrowed, the younger thoroughly confused for a while before he looks up at me. He gives me a strange look before a bit of realization crosses him. Prepared for him to either slap me or giggle like he did with his hyungs, I wasn’t sure what he was doing when he wiggled his way up, coming face to face with me. It isn’t until I notice him leaning closer that it hits me, and once Tae’s eyes close so do mine.

He gently moves his lips against mine, like he’s testing the waters. I let him do what he wants, moving my hand to twirl the ends of his hair. It only lasts for a few seconds and then he’s pulling away, softly gnawing on his lip again. Curious myself this time, I slowly lay Taehyung on his back and hover above him, resting between his legs. He looks up at me with wide, innocent eyes, hands clutching at my biceps as my own hold his hips. I lean down towards Tae, kissing him again. Our lips gently move against each other, keeping a slow pace. Tae’s lips are soft and plush against mine, like cotton candy, and faintly taste of the coconut chapstick he uses.

I don’t feel any fireworks or butterflies kissing him. There isn’t a spark or a flame, none of that cheesy shit. But it does feel right, it feels like the only thing in the world that makes sense. So, with nothing but darkness surrounding us and a bell chiming in the distance, signaling the time, I let myself softly kiss Taehyung. I kiss his lips, his cute cheeks, his nose, his forehead, his temples, his brows, and everywhere in between. I smile a bit when I hear his quiet giggles, happy that he’s happy again. I move my hands up and start tickling his sides, effectively making him laugh loudly, his eyes closed and smile wide as he tries to squirm away.

I keep him in place, however, still peppering kisses all over his face. It isn’t until he’s begging me to stop that I pause my assault, moving away a bit so he can breathe. But instead he cups my face, looking at me with shining eyes before somehow smiling even larger.

“Kiss kiss, Ggukie!” He exclaims.

I smile back and lean down to peck him again, both of us chuckling against each other’s lips more than kissing. Eventually I roll off of him, pulling him right back against me and playing with his hair again.

“Feeling better, bun?”.

I laugh a bit as his hair bounces while he nods. “A lot better.”

“Do you want to talk about it?”

He shakes his head. “Nope. It’s not important anymore.”

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. Wanna know why?”

“Why?”

“Because I know I’m strong enough to overcome it.”

“Yeah.....yeah, you are.”

I peck his forehead before burying my face in his hair, holding him close to me.

“Night, bun.” I murmur.

“Night night, Ggukie.”

Surprisingly, Tae wakes up first in the morning just as energetic and bubbly as ever. He practically drags me into doing my morning routine while merely staying in his pajamas himself. When we enter the kitchen there’s a bit of a tense atmosphere as Yugyeom is there. Several people straight out glare at the male, other’s avoid him. And when Tae and I came in, all eyes were on us, waiting for our reaction. Taehyung was the first one to make a move, not having stopped walking when we came in. He merely grabs my hand and pulls me to get breakfast, completely ignoring Yugyeom and acting as if he wasn’t there.

Despite the initial awkwardness around everyone, breakfast continues more or less normally. Taehyung goes to change before heading to the gym after we eat, and I go to my office and await the arrival of the scouts. Luckily I don’t have to wait long, soon Bogum is leading a few scouts in. There’s a bit of small talk before I hand him documents for him to fill out about their findings, then they’re off on their way. I, on the other hand, head to the gym to see Taehyung.

The younger is doing pull ups when I walk in, his back to me. He now wears a t-shirt and joggers, the shirt actually fitting him. I sit on the bench behind him, quietly watching him workout. It’s completely quiet except for Taehyung’s breathing and small grunts here and there, no one in the room besides us. I see him do thirty six pull ups before he drops to his feet, taking in a deep breath of air. Without turning around he grabs a nearby towel and water bottle, wiping his forehead and slinging the towel over his shoulder before drinking his water. It’s then that he finally turns around, nearly choking on his water when he sees me.

“Fucking hell,” He says, coughing slightly.

“Are you okay?” I ask, giving him a worried look.

He nods, coughing a few more times and taking a sip of water. He takes a seat next to me, groaning as he plops down, sitting for a few seconds before shifting his body and laying on the bench, his head in my lap.

“How long have you been here?” He asks.

“Since your last thirty-ish pull ups.”

He nods, closing his eyes and sighing in content.

“Tired?” I question.

“Not yet, but it’s break time so…” He trails off.

“Fair enough.”

“Did the scouts come back?”

I nod. “They’re writing down what they got right now.”

“And you want Joonie and I reviewing it for you, right?”

Another nod. “There’s something else I want you, specifically, to do.”

“What is it?”

“I want you to lead this operation.”


	24. 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Love is a fool's weakness, but a wise man's greatest weapon.

_ Taehyung _

Planning.

My second most favorite part about going on missions, the execution of the plan being the first, obviously. After Jeongguk said he wanted me leading the operation, to which I definitely agreed, the next couple of weeks were full of planning. And if I wasn’t planning with Jeongguk, Namjoon, and Jackson (he’s the one I put in charge of the second team), I was either working out at the gym or taking care of Jeongguk’s files. I may or may not have became his new secretary, in a way, not that either of us minded.

It took some of the strain off of Jeongguk and it gave me something to do. Luckily, I didn’t have any more nightmares, but more often than not I stayed the night with Jeongguk anyway. I don’t know what it is about the older, but when I’m with him it’s like, for once in my life, I actually have control over myself and I can overcome my demons. It’s also because of that that I didn’t have anymore near spikes, and when I had episodes (whether they be rage episodes or any other) Jeongguk was the one to take care of me.

He never minds my clinginess, and as time passed by he’d be the one to initiate skinship a good chunk of the time as well. He even kisses me randomly from time to time, just like my hyungs do, and it makes me smile every time. Not only did I get close with Jeongguk, but most of Got7, Mina, and even surprisingly Bogum as well. The only ones I didn’t become friends with are Yugyeom, who hasn’t said anything to me since he triggered me, and Eunae, who’s never around long enough to even have a proper conversation with. I’d be surprised if she can even keep up with the operation, but Jeongguk assured me she would be and that she does this often.

Everything seemed to be working out, everyone seemed to be adjusting, and soon a new feeling I’d never felt before, one I can’t describe, began to settle over me. It wasn’t like when my family was completed, it wasn’t the feeling of being loved. It was something different, something I like very much. A knock on my door cuts through the previously quiet atmosphere, and without an answer it opens. It’s not like one was needed, I already knew who was coming before they came. Jeongguk closes the door behind him, slow steady footsteps tell me that he’s walking behind me, lingering for a moment before he takes a seat in the armchair.

“Are you about to get ready?” He asks me.

“Yeah, I still have a few things to check before we leave so it’s best to get ready now. I see you’re ready, though.”

Jeongguk wears a black tactical shit, one that defines his muscles and shows off his tattoos, black cargo pants, and matching combat boots. Dual holsters on his waist hold a pair of pistols, and one is strapped to his leg.

“Not completely, but most of it.” He says.

I nod and open up the closet door, the outfit I plan on wearing already ready for me. I pull it out and set it on my bed, stripping out of my clothes soon after.

“No panties?” Jeongguk asks, looking at my boxers.

“They’re not very fun to wear on missions. They always go up my ass and not in the good way.”

Jeongguk chuckles, watching as I get dressed. I pull on the black pants first, the material stretchy enough so that I’ll have lots of mobility when the operation begins. Next I put on a black tank top, over which I put on a black tailed waistcoat and zip it up. After that is a harness that covers my neck and collarbones, the piece staying on due to a strap wrapping from my back, under my arm and connecting to my chest. I wrap a belt around my waist, pulling on a pair of leather gloves that clasp around my forearms afterwards. Finally I tie on a pair of black boots, sitting at the end of my bed to do so.

“Are those Converses?” Jeongguk questions as I tie my other boot.

I give him a cheeky smile, nodding. “Yup.”

He shakes his head, but I catch the sliver of a smile on his face.

“How are you feeling?” He asks.

I stand up, going to the side of my bed to pull out the case beneath it.

“Excited, and a tiny bit nervous. I usually do exterminations on my own. I don’t know how this’ll turn out, but I’m confident in the plan we made.” I tell him.

“You came up with an amazing plan. I doubt it will fail.”

I smile a bit, cheeks slightly rosy as I mumble a “thank you”. I go ahead and start taking out the weapons I want to bring with me. Almost everything I carry are knives; two hunting knives on either side of my waist, two daggers on each ankle, another knife strapped to the outside of my forearm, throwing knives in the slots on the harness I drape across my chest, a knife on one thigh and a gun on the other, and finally a throwing axe sitting snugly on my lower back.

“Think you have enough knives there?” Jeongguk jokes.

“You can never have too many knives.”

“No?”

“Nope!”

I chuckle as I plop myself onto Jeongguk’s lap, the other’s hands grasping onto my waist as my own come to play the hair at the nape of his neck.

“You have a meeting in two days at Revamp about expanding your drug routes in their territory.” I tell him.

“What time?”

“Ten pm. I’ve already organized your entourage, transportation, and have bugs and cameras set up just in case.”

“How do you do that?”

“Do what?”

“Know what I want and need before I can even tell you?”

I whine as Jeongguk smirks, teasing me.

“I don’t know, telepathy?” I joke.

“I thought you said you aren’t telepathic.”

“I never said I wasn’t telepathic, I just didn’t use it then.”

“Yeah, sure, okay. I’m gonna check on a few things before we gather everyone up.”

I nod and hop off of his lap, heading to the bathroom as he leaves. Since my hair is pretty long, I quickly brush it out before pulling the top half into a small ponytail. I make sure the rest of my hair is out of the way and that I’m not wearing anything too identifiable. Considering how long I’ve been in the Rose and my status in the group, I’ve got the biggest target on my back out of everyone. If I’m out of the way, getting rid of the others will be like taking candy from a baby. So keeping my identity hidden, especially during missions, is pretty vital. I usually don’t have to worry about it when I go out just to have fun (which is surprisingly minimal), but someone will come with me just to be safe. I keep my mask off for now, not wanting it to get in the way, and leave the bathroom.

_ Okay, all done here. I should have everything else I still need to do in my notepad. _ I find my notepad on one of my dressers and flip through it, looking for the checklist I have prepared. The first thing I have written is to check all of the equipment we’ll be using. This typically isn’t a problem, but since Jeongguk did have a rat infestation for a while I need to make sure none of our gear has been tampered with. Nodding slightly to myself, I put my notepad in my pocket and prepare to leave. Just as I’m about to open the door, someone knocks on the other side. I go ahead and open, a smile automatically rising as I look at the person who knocked.

“Hey Joonie, you getting ready?” I ask.

The older won’t be entering the base with us, he’ll be controlling the electricity and telephone lines inside our designated get away van, but he still gets into uniform just in case.

“I’m about to, you?”

Namjoon has an interesting way of expressing worry or fear. He doesn’t pick at his hands or clothes, he doesn’t act antsy, nor does his voice shake or break as he speaks. When he’s worried or scared, he becomes serious. Well, even more than usual. He becomes very serious and determined, and will usually swiftly get rid of or diffuse whatever made him that way. Not much makes him worried or scares him, but the one thing that never fails to terrify him is me being but in danger. Even if I’m doing something I’ve done a hundred times before it still worries him, so it wasn’t much of a surprise to see the older’s jaw slightly pushed out and eyes narrowed.

“I’ve finished, I’m about to take care of some last minute things now.” I tell him as he enters.

“You’ve reviewed the plan?”

“I made it, reviewed it, critiqued it, and made the back up plans. I got this, Joonie.”

Namjoon sighs, his strong facade peeling away as he gives me a worried look.

“I know, I know you do. If anyone can make a plan like this happen, it’s you, I know this. I just.......I can’t help but get worried.” He says.

I walk up to him, pulling him into a hug. He immediately hugs me back, head resting on top of mine.

“I know you do, Joonie, but you don’t have to be. We have a good plan, we know what kind of opponent we’re facing, and I won’t be going in alone.” I explain.

“Just......just promise me you’ll be careful.”

I lean away from the older and hold up my pinkie, beaming a smile.

“I pinkie promise.”

Namjoon chuckles, lifting his hand to interlock his pinkie with mine. We stamp our thumbs together, sealing it with a kiss before pulling away.

“You’re my dad, boogie woogie woogie.” I randomly say, making Namjoon laugh.

He envelops me in another tight hug which I happily accept. When we pull apart, Namjoon doesn’t seem quite as worried as when he arrived. I smile at that to myself, mentally patting myself on the back.

“Well, I should let you get to whatever you need to finish. If you need me I’ll be going over my end of the plan in my room.” Namjoon speaks up.

I nod, letting out a quiet “okay”. Both of us leave my room, but part ways there to do what we need to do.

  
  


\---

_ Jeongguk _

Hours pass after I leave Taehyung’s room, most of which is spent making sure preparations for tonight are complete. With time to spare before the designated meeting time, I head to my room to put on the rest of my gear. I run a mental checklist in my head, making sure everything is complete, as I head out to the garage. I’ll be joining Tae’s group for the mission, the younger and I leading half of the men we bring through the back door and Yoongi, Jimin, and Hoseok leading the rest through the front. Jin and Namjoon will stay in the van; Namjoon takes care of the power and phone lines while Jin is the getaway driver.

Jackson will be leading Got7 along with Eunae for the second group. There are many buzzing around the garage once I arrive, everyone preparing to leave. They easily part as I pass, heading to my designated van. Taehyung is already seated in the back when I arrive, eyes closed and hands resting in his lap. I start to enter as well when someone grabs my wrist and pulls me away.

“Sorry, I just didn’t want you to bother Tae.” Hoseok says, looking at my confused expression.

“What is he doing?” I question, looking back at the blonde’s motionless figure.

“He’s slipping into a more focused headspace, basically. Not complete focus but enough to complete this mission as best as possible.”

“How does he...?”

Hoseok chuckles. “I’m telling you, Tae goes insane when he’s just a cute fluffball, but he goes fucking  _ stupid _ when he actually focuses. The kid has more control over his mind than you think.”

I just nod, curious as to what Tae’s new personality will be like. Around five minutes later, I notice Taehyung standing at the back door of the van. There’s a visible shift in his demeanor, similar to his aura right before he started spiking, but not quite as bloodthirsty. This Taehyung keeps a calm and cool stature, his eyes slightly darker than usual and holding more thoughts and words than his blank face, calculating every movement. He stands tall, or as tall as he can, and keeps his hands interlocked behind his back. I walk up to him, tucking my hands into my pockets as I look up at him.

“Are you ready?” I ask him.

He looks down at me with determined eyes.

“Yes sir.”

A shiver crawls down my spine at his deeper, huskier voice and his response in general. Excitement pumps through my veins, anticipation of what the younger will do causes my heart to race, and I couldn’t stop the smirk on my face even if I wanted to.

“Good boy,” I purr, watching as something akin to gaiety flashes in the other’s eyes.

His lips quirk up in a short smile before quickly fading, yet a pleased look faintly remains in his eyes. He steps back as I climb inside and take a seat next to the one he was in, watching as he lingers at the back before sitting down again. He keeps a straight posture, one leg crossed over the other and once everyone starts loading into the vans he shuts his eyes, resuming a motionless position. When we start driving, the ride is mostly silent except for some bags occasionally clanking at our feet. It’s when we’re around ten minutes away that Namjoon picks up one of the bags and starts passing out night vision goggles and earpieces.

The goggles aren’t too bulky, thankfully, and sit pretty well on our faces. The earpieces are already on and connected to each other, but we still test them out just to be safe. Hoseok and Yoongi both put on backpacks, their contents unknown to me.We all start getting ready to get out as soon as Namjoon gives us the okay, and it isn’t long before the van stops and Namjoon starts typing on his laptop. Meanwhile, the rest of us exit the van and stealthily come up to the small manor, the rest of our group joining us. We split into our two groups, Tae and I leading our unit to the back.

Despite focussing on the mission, a part of me couldn’t keep my eyes off of Tae. It’s my first time seeing him in action and I want to make sure everything goes well.  _ And there’s something so irrevocably enticing about his persona. Something that awakens a part of me I never knew existed. _ Taehyung and I stand on either side of the back door, me next to the doorknob and the blonde by the hinges. I hold an automatic in my arms, clutching the metal in my hands. Taehyung holds several throwing knives in one hand and a hunting knife in the other.

Even though he’s so close to me, I can barely sense his presence. Unbridled excitement fills my body, and when Namjoon gives us the all clear to go in, the lights going out and confused clamour being heard from inside, I quickly move in front of the door and kick it open. Taehyung is just a blur as he dashes inside, not even his footsteps can be heard. Before I can even follow after him I hear shouts of pain, and when I enter I see the three closest men to the door already dead on the floor. Two have knives in their head (one in an eye and the other right in the mouth), and the last has a knife lodged in his throat.

I quickly cover for Taehyung as he lunges at another man, jumping on him and swiftly slitting his throat before easily dodging someone blindly attacking him. The way he moves is unnatural and mesmerizing, it’s almost as if he’s floating through the room, his fighting appearing as a deadly dance. Gun fire fills the room, but Taehyung is a silent killer, he thrives in the dark as if it’s his second home. Before I know it, he’s already pushing forward and out of the back room. I follow after him, quickly making sure the others have everything handled. The younger takes the lead, dealing with closer targets as I handle the ones further away.

Taehyung wastes no time in getting rid of target after target, going straight for the kill and not dawdling around. He’s a predator, a tiger stalking its prey and attacking in one powerful strike. Watching him caused something to arise in me, fire spreading through my body and steadily rising the more I see of him. The way he effortlessly moves his body, bending in ways I didn’t know a person could, the way he doesn’t even break a sweat as he attacks, the way he knows just where to place his blades in order to kill his opponent, it was addicting to watch. It’s different kind of high, but so much more pleasurable and addictive.

When we meet up with the others in the main hall, dozens of dead bodies already decorate the floor and stairs, blood pooling on the ground and painting the walls. Taehyung’s movements begin to coordinate with Jimin’s, the pair tag teaming the enemy. I run out of ammo for my automatic and switch it for my pistols, Yoongi covering for me as I do so.

“Jeongguk, follow me. We’re heading upstairs.” I hear Taehyung say through the ear piece.

“Got it.” I respond.

I follow after Taehyung as we head upstairs, the younger having his pistol pulled out and aimed at the ready alongside a knife. There aren’t too many people upstairs, most of them probably having come down when the lights shut out. We quickly clear out the upper levels, making sure not to miss any spots, and then begin to head back towards the others. Most of the gunfire has ended by now, letting us know we’re just about down here. But as we get near the stairs there’s more sudden gun shots followed by a scream.

“Shit, there’s more!” Jimin shouts.

Almost immediately Taehyung and I rush to the stairs. However, Taehyung starts to veer away from them and switches his gun and knife for throwing knives. I watch as he, with zero hesitation, jumps onto the guardrail of the balcony, turning around as he leaps off. My lips curl into a smile as he does a backflip midair, back arching, and lets his knives soar. I have no doubt that they hit their target dead on, and as Hoseok swiftly catches the blonde before setting him down and resuming what he was doing, I stroll down the stairs.

The rest of the violence soon dies out, and once Yoongi shouts the all clear, Namjoon turns the lights back on. I take off my night vision goggles, resting them atop my head. As soon as my eyes adjust to the light, they lock onto Taehyung who stands in the center of the room. I slowly rake my eyes across his figure, taking in his blood stained clothes and the splats of red in his hair. His goggles rest around his neck and his chest rapidly rises and falls as he pants. He slips one of his bloodied knives into its sheath and lifts his gloved hand to tug down his mask.

I make my way to him, putting my gun away as I walk. Taehyung notices that I’m nearing him, but before he can completely face me I grab his chin and angle his head so he’s looking up at me. I smirk at the gasp he makes, eyes wide with shock as I stare into his shining orbs.

“Good work, darling. You did an excellent job.” I tell him, my smirk widening as I feel the smaller shiver slightly.

“Thank you, sir.” He replies, and I nearly purr in delight.

_ I love it when he calls me that. _ But in a split second Taehyung has a smirk of his own and takes off one of his gloves. He reaches up a hand to my face, brushing it against my cheek before pulling away. I see the rose colored liquid on his thumb, heart pounding in my chest as he brings it to his lips, licking it off with a single swipe of his tongue. He gives me a wink, a mischievous look in his eyes as he pulls away from me and puts his glove back on.

“We got ten minutes to wrap this up! Let’s go!” He shouts before turning around.

“J, heads up!” Hoseok calls out as he tosses two cans to Taehyung.

He catches them with ease and I walk behind him as he heads to the foyer. He tosses off the caps of the cans, shaking them before pulling his mask back up. Red and black spray paint decorates the wall as Taehyung paints an insignia: a red rose with a black snake encircling its stem, the head of the snake just next to the petals. The process is swift and precise, as if he had done it a thousand times before. Soon I find myself leaving the manor alongside everyone else, everyone already celebrating a job well done. Taehyung sits next to Namjoon when we get to the van and rests his head on his shoulder, eyes fluttering shut as Namjoon puts an arm around his waist.

The others talk quietly among one another as we head home, exhaustion creeping up on us. I let my head fall back, thumping against the side of the van, and close my eyes, chest heaving as I let out a deep sigh. Time moves both slowly and quickly, my mind blocking out all sounds until the van finally stops. Everyone starts filing out of the vehicle, Namjoon last with a sleeping Taehyung in his arms. We all head to our rooms, retiring for the night with the notion that we meet early in the morning to discuss stage two. I quickly take off my weapons, leaving them on the dresser before heading into the bathroom. I take off my dirtied clothes, tossing them in the bin after starting the shower. I wait until it’s warmed up to get in, the water almost immediately turning red and fading into a rose pink. I stand directly beneath the stream, my hair flattening against my face. Without bothering to push it back as I know it will just fall right back, I pick up the soap and start scrubbing my body clean.

I wash my hair afterwards, taking my time with everything and not minding when the water gets cold. What feels like hours later I finally shut the water off and get out, grabbing a nearby towel and wiping my face off before anything else. I quickly dry off, the little energy burst the shower gave me quickly fading and exhaustion creeping up my bones. Steam billows out of the door as soon as it opens just the slightest. My eyes quickly land on the person sitting on my bed, a silk black shirt covering their petite frame and making them appear smaller than usual.  _ My shirt _ . Taehyung’s legs are crossed beneath him, a file on his lap and a pen in his hand.

His golden locks cover his eyes and he doesn’t bother pushing them away. He doesn’t look up as I enter, just continues reading his file and scribbling something down here and there. I pull on some clothes (just underwear and sweats) and climb into bed next to the younger who still doesn’t acknowledge me. I frown slightly at that, but it’s quickly replaced with a smirk as I get an idea. I sit back up and scoot closer to Taehyung before rapidly shaking my head like a dog, the water from my still soaking hair going everywhere, including on Taehyung. The blonde lets out a shriek, quickly closing his file and moving it away before trying to get me to stop.

“Jeongguk! Ggukie! Ggukie stop!” He shouts, trying not to laugh.

I let out a mischievous chuckle before gripping onto his waist and flipping him onto the bed, hovering above him. I continue to splatter water on him, my hands quickly working at his sides, making him erupt in laughter.

“Stop ignoring me.” I tell him as he tries to escape me but to no avail.

“I-i-is th-that what th-this is a-about? F-fine! J-just get o-off of me y-you big m-man child!” Taehyung stutters, the biggest smile yet on his face and tears collecting in the corners of his eyes.

“Because you just called me a big man child, I don’t think I will stop.”

Taehyung chokes on a laugh and I move my hands to slide up his shirt, but freezing when I feel lace instead. The younger takes the chance to wrap his legs around my waist and swiftly change our positions, his hands placed on my chest as he straddles me. I can’t help but stare as he pants for air, his hair messy, eyes shining, cheeks rosy and a wide smile on his lips.

“Gorgeous,” I mutter, awestruck by his beauty.

His cheeks turn a bright red, and it’s only then that I realize I said it aloud. I laugh softly and lift a hand to cup his cheek, brushing my thumb across the soft skin. He leans into my touch, eyes gently shutting as he lets out a hum of contentment. I bring my other hand to rub up and down his thigh, softly squeezing the flesh from time to time. We stay like that for that for a while, a comfortable ambience surrounding us until Taehyung opens his eyes, his mesmerizing eyes boring into my own. Lost in his eyes, I barely make out when he says we should dry my hair. I just know that he wants to do something, and who am I to deny him what he wants?

When he slides off of my lap I let him take my hand and guide me back into the bathroom, sitting on the toilet seat and watching as Taehyung grabs the hair dryer. He soon settles between my legs, my hands coming to rest on his waist as he turns the hair dryer on. The incessant droning of the object falls upon deaf ears as I close my eyes and focus on the warm air blowing on my head and Taehyung’s fingers running through my hair. I revel in the feeling for a while before looking up at Taehyung, smiling a bit at his focused face, his tongue peeking out between his teeth.

I let my gaze travel down, hands dropping to his thighs. It’s when I notice the bottom few buttons of his shirt still undone and see the small bit of lace underneath that I remember what I felt earlier. I lift up the hem of his shirt, gulping slightly at the black lace and partially see through panties he has on. He makes no reaction as I skim my fingers across the fabric, laying my hands flat against his sides as I roam to the back and grip gently onto the curve of his ass. He does let out a quiet giggle at that, making me smile a bit before I rest my head against his stomach. His cute baby fat is gone, abs quickly replacing it as he works out every chance he gets.

_ He’s still beautiful either way. _ A few minutes later and the younger shuts the hair dryer off, setting it to the side before brushing my hair around. I let him do what he wants, lifting my head up to watch him with soft eyes. He doesn’t look back at me, but the rising blush on his cheeks lets me know he’s aware of my gaze, making me smile a bit.

“You look stunning in black, sweetheart.” I say in a hushed tone.

Instead of answering verbally, he cups my face and leans down, placing his lips atop mine. A hum of satisfaction reverberates in the back of my throat as I carefully kiss him back. Like most of our kisses, it doesn’t last long, just a few seconds long.  _ Long enough to be considered platonic _ . When Taehyung pulls away, he places another short kiss to the tip of my nose, making me chuckle at his cuteness.

“Let’s go to bed now, yeah?” I ask.

“Yeah.”

I stand up and lift the other into my arms, still holding onto his bum. Taehyung’s arms automatically wrap around my shoulders and his head rests against my chest. I carry him back into the bedroom and lay him beneath the covers. He props himself up on the pillows as I pick up the file he was working on earlier and his pen.

“Hey, what’s this for?” I question, showing him the manila file.

“The SIO case.”

I raise an eyebrow, looking at just how much is inside the folder.

“You have this much already? When did you have the time to do all this?”

The younger shrugs. “You’d be surprised at how well I can manage my time.”

“When it comes to you I’m always surprised by something.”

We both chuckle a bit at that and I open the file, sitting on the edge of the bed as I look at some of its contents.

“Any leads so far?”

“Not so much as a lead rather than intuition, heh. There are still some things I want to check out before moving forward.”

I nod, too busy looking at his work to hear him moving. I feel the warmth of his breath on my neck first, then his hands on my shoulders before sliding down my chest. His chest presses against my back and he places his chin on my shoulder, dainty fingers tracing my tattoos.

“How come you haven’t got a tattoo here?” The question comes out so lightly I nearly miss it.

I glance down at the place he’s asking about and see his fingers brushing over my heart.

“I want to put something meaningful there, something that has a lot of value to me. So far I haven’t come across that something.”

“Ouch, that hurts,” Taehyung jokes. “Am I not meaningful to you, Jeongguk? I’m your friend, aren’t I?”

I chuckle at that, closing the file and leaning into Taehyung’s hold.

“Well, you are the only one to know my favorite color.”

That makes us both laugh before a relaxing atmosphere befalls us.

“Why not put the name of the person you love most there?”

My lips tug into a frown, not even giving the thought of loving someone the time of day. Love makes you weak, it makes you vulnerable, and I can’t afford to be either.

“No, that’d be a weakness.” My response sounds harsher than it should’ve been, but Taehyung merely chuckles.

And then he says something that stayed in my mind for the rest of the night and many days to follow.

“Love is a fool’s weakness, but a wise man’s greatest weapon.”


	25. 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Only good boys get acknowledged.

_ Taehyung _

“79, 80, 81, 82, 83, 84, 85, 86, 87, 88, 89, 90,” Small grunts and puffs of air leave my mouth as I continue doing pushups.

My muscles ache from all of the exercising I’ve done so far today, yet my mind blocks it out. This is the last exercise for today, anyways. Technically, pushups weren’t a part of today’s routine, but since I have a lot of time to spare before I need to get ready I decided to exercise a little bit more. Sweat drips obnoxiously down my face and neck and causes my shirt (well, Hobi’s shirt) to stick uncomfortably to my body. After I reach one hundred pushups I manage to sit on a nearby bench, slightly stumbling when I first get up from pushing myself so much.

I grab my towel and wipe the sweat from my head and neck. I know that if I start to relax too much now I won’t feel like getting up later, so after I drink some water I pack my stuff up and head out. As I walk out of the gym, I run into someone who was on their way in, my face hitting their chest.

“Oh shit, sorry Tae. I didn’t know you were leaving.” The male says as he steps back, making sure I’m okay.

“‘S okay, hyung. Do you need something?” I ask, rubbing my nose slightly.

“Just wanted to report back to you. Oh, here, lemme carry your bag.”

“Ah, thank you.”

“No problem.”

I let Jackson take my duffel bag from me and he gestures for me to walk.

“I took care of the thing you asked, I left the overview on your bed. Also, I’ve sent out groups already to start stage two, everything’s ready for when the boss has you send everyone out. I’ve also got people working on flags and shit for the final stage.” Jackson tells me.

“Great, thank you. And have they found out about the other two groups?”

“I had some outside sources give them an anonymous tip, their guard is certainly up. I don’t know how you plan on getting this to work.”

I chuckle a bit. “Just remember that there’s not a person I can’t find and not a place I can’t get into.”

“Oh believe me, I know. You even managed to get into Jeon’s room  _ and _ make it through the night.”

I pause to laugh at that, finding the incredulous tone in the other’s voice funny.

“You make it sound like he’s a demon or something.” I say.

“He  _ is _ .”

“Oh hush. We all know I’m the true demon here.”

“True. But still, I’d never think he’d let  _ anyone _ sleep in his bed or wear his clothes.”

I shrug. “He has a nice bed and I like cuddling him. And he has two of literally every piece of clothing. How could I not take some? Plus I like the way they smell.”

Jackson snorts, chuckling right after. “What do they smell like? Some expensive ass cologne?”

“No, Jeongguk doesn’t wear cologne. It irritates his skin. If you must know, he smells like cinnamon and something woodsy.”

“Something woodsy?”

“Mmm, I haven’t figured it out yet. Probably because I’ve never smelled it before.”

“So if you like the way a person smells you’ll steal their clothes?”

I scoff slightly. “Yeah, you got a nice scent so watch your clothes.”

“Oh shoot, I do?” I roll my eyes, laughing a bit as Jackson starts sniffing himself. “I can’t smell it, what do I smell like?”

“Well first, stop acting like a dog trying to sniff your own ass,” He does as I say, smiling sheepishly and I just shake my head. “You smell like peppermint with a bit of citrus.”

“How the hell can you smell that?”

“I once spent a couple of months trapped in a huge ass cellar that was completely pitch black and had to rely on my other senses to navigate around. Ever since, I make sure to train all of my senses so that should anything similar happen again I know how to react.”

“You really have been through hell, huh?”

“Sweetheart I am hell.”

“Yeah, but save the ‘sweetheart’ for Jeon.”

“Well fuck you then.”

“What? Jeon will probably kill me if he hears you calling me that, and he’s the type to kill first and ask questions later.”

“Well, it depends on the person and what they did, to be honest, but close enough. And why are you making it seem like Jeongguk and I are dating or something? We’re just friends. He’s protective, not possessive.”

“Sure, friends. Who kiss each other.”

“It’s  _ completely _ platonic! I kiss my family all of the time and it’s nothing romantic.”

“And the heart eyes you two give each other are completely platonic as well. And so is the fact that you two literally cling to each other.”

“We do  _ not _ have heart eyes.”

“Yes you do.”

“Not.”

“Do.”

“Not.”

“You totally do!”

“We totally do not!”

“Whatever you say, Tae.”

The conversation comes to a close as we arrive at my room. Jackson gives me my gym bag back and I wave him a temporary goodbye before heading into my room. Jackson will be joining us during tonight’s meeting alongside Namjoon, Yoongi, and Mark. There’s just a small group of us going since the meeting isn’t that important. Well, in my books it isn’t. I leave my bag by the door and immediately go to the shower, feeling disgusted in my sweaty clothes. I shower quickly, needing to hurry and get dressed before reminding Jeongguk to get ready and make sure everything is set. The talk I had with Jackson took longer than I anticipated so I’m slightly off schedule.

After showering and quickly lotioning I pull on the clothes I had already set out before heading to the gym. The clothes are a bit different from what I wear; black dress pants and a white button down with black suspenders. I need a bit more of a formal outfit because after studying the ones we’ll be meeting, I know what I normally wear would draw unnecessary attention - the kind that would make me stab someone in the eye. I style my hair once I’m dressed, going for Jeongguk’s signature side part. As I do, I notice my lip piercing and decide to put a new ring in. I opt for a silver spiral ring with a dragon’s head on one end and its tail on the other.

I tie on a pair of black dress shoes after that and grab a pair of knives (and a gun for safe measure), putting them on as I make my way to Jeongguk’s room. The older should have finished the last file I gave him long by now and doing whatever in his room. After I started helping him with work he’s had an abundance of time on his hands, and I’m not sure he knows what to do with it. He’s spent his entire life dedicated to the mafia, and now that he has the option to fill his time with something else, he’s not sure how to use it. It’s nice to see him changing, though. Just because we live this life, it doesn’t mean it has to stop us from enjoying life to its fullest and doing what ‘normal people’ do.

Two solid knocks fill the air as I knock on Jeongguk’s door, patiently waiting when I hear him say “just a moment”. I rock back and forth on my feet, hands loosely interlocked behind my back. My whistling cuts through the silence, a random tune on my lips as my limited patience quickly dies out.

“Ggukie, open the door please.” I say.

“Coming, Tae.” He responds.

A few moments later the door opens, revealing a shirtless Jeongguk in sweats. He begins to say something before he abruptly stops, onyx eyes slowly traveling down my body.

“Jeongguk?” I call out after a minute or two, the older still staring at me without saying anything.

He still doesn’t respond, and I can’t help the tint on my cheeks from his intense gaze.

“Ggukie?” I say again.

“You look amazing dressed up like that, doll.” There was something about the way his voice had become deeper, something raw, that had me shivering and my blush rising.

“T-thank you, Ggukie.”

He finally looks me in the eyes, a smirk growing on his face.

“You came to remind me about the meeting, right?” He asks.

I nod, not trusting myself to speak without stuttering.

“Thank you. Would you mind coming in for a minute? I have something to give you.”

“O-oh, okay.”

Jeongguk takes a step to the side and I walk inside, immediately noticing the long, rectangular box on his bed, completely white with a purple bow on top.  _ Oh, it’s a gift. _ I step in front of the bed, running my fingers along the surface. _ Why did he get it? What is it? _ Jeongguk’s hands on my hips grab my attention, the warmth of his breath hitting my ear as he leans down.

“Open it.” He whispers.

I grab the cover, trying to focus on the task and not the way Jeongguk’s body presses closer against mine. White tissue paper covers the object inside, and after pulling out four pieces and finding more tissue paper, I grow annoyed and start ripping them out by the handful. Jeongguk chuckles in my ear, causing a smile to rise on my lips. When the object inside is revealed a sharp gasp leaves my lips, mouth open and eyes wide as I stare at it. Inside lays a large mallet,  _ just like Harley Quinn’s _ , a light purplish pink in color. White paint snakes up the handle and the head in the form of vines and leaves, and different colored roses add a pop of color.

In vertical writing along the handle, in perfect cursive, is the word “morning star” and on both faces is the letter “J” in the same writing. I trace my fingers across the words, not able to say anything as I look at the object. It’s the exact same weapon I described to Jeongguk after my near spike. The exact color, the same designs, the same lettering on the faces. The only thing that wasn’t a part of the design I told him was the “morning star” on the handle. However it only makes me love it more as I know just what it stands for and what it means between us. Jeongguk’s hands slowly travel up and down my sides in a comforting manner, and I feel him place a soft kiss just behind my ear.

“Do you like it, darling?” He asks me.

For a moment I don’t answer, just continue to stare in shock and confusion.

“W-what........why is this- why did you-” I can’t seem to form a proper sentence, too many questions in my head trying to come out at once.

“You said you wanted one, so I got it for you. Do you not like it?”

Joy bubbles up inside of me, and before I know it, I’ve turned around and practically jumped into the older’s arms.

“I love it! Thank you so much!” I exclaim, smiling against his shoulder.

The other chuckles, arms enveloping my smaller body.

“You’re welcome, I’m glad you like it.” He replies, nuzzling his nose against the side of my head.

I giggle at the affection and turn my head to place a series of butterfly kisses on his cheek and jawline. Jeongguk takes me by surprise when he kisses me on the lips, the action short and sweet and making me giggle again.

“Mmm, petal, I have to get ready now.” He says while kissing my cheek.

“Then get ready.” I reply, pulling the other closer despite my words.

“Want to pick an outfit out for me?”

My head perks up at that, even more excitement building up in me.

“Can I?” I ask, nearly bouncing up and down.

“Go ahead, sweetheart.”

Just as I’m about to bound my way to his closet, I stop in my tracks as I remember just what we’re supposed to do. Well, what  _ I’m _ supposed to.

“I can’t, I have some things to check before we leave.” I tell Jeongguk with a small pout.

Jeongguk flicks my lips, a smirk on his lips.

“Don’t pout, angel. I already called Namjoon to take care of everything for you, I didn’t know how long this would take.” He explains.

I don’t respond in words, I just let out a squeal and peck his cheek before dashing into his closet. I hear the other laughing behind me, the sound quiet but deep. I already know what I want to choose, having seen the articles of clothing the first time I raided Jeongguk’s closet and immediately wanting to see him wearing it.

“Done already? That was fa- woah-” Jeongguk’s sentence is cut off as I drag him into the bathroom and hand him his clothes.

“Hurry up and change! We don’t have much time!” I shout as I shut the door.

While Jeongguk changes, I carefully pick up the mallet from its box. I test its weight in my hands, figuring out where and how to move. I give it a few practice swings, making sure to not hit anything in the room as I do so. My heart swells when I think of Jeongguk getting this for me merely because I wanted it.  _ I didn’t even ask him for it. He just.......got it. He had to have it custom made as well, because there’s no way someone was just selling a mallet identical to the one I imagined _ . I need to do something for him as well, give him something that he will like. But what  _ will _ he like? I’m not even sure he himself knows what he likes.

A few minutes later I hear the bathroom door open and quickly put my mallet back in the box. I turn to face Jeongguk, immediately choking on saliva cause  _ damn he looks good. _ The older has on a black button down beneath a maroon suit jacket and matching pants and  _ holy hell maroon looks so good on him _ .

“Thank you for the compliment, darling. I’m not the biggest fan of maroon, but it does look good on me.” Jeongguk says with a smirk, snapping me from my thoughts.

My eyes widen slightly, cheeks reddening some.  _ Oh shit did I say that- _

“Outloud? Yes, you did. You might want to be careful of what you say, petal. You don’t want to say the wrong thing in front of the wrong person, do you?”

His teasing tone mixed with his outfit, smirk, and close proximity (and when the hell did he walk up to me?) cause my heart to either skip a few beats or stop for a few seconds. I’m not quite sure which one, perhaps it’s both. He hooks one arm around my waist, his free hand rising to hold my chin up to face him, his thumb gliding over my lower lip.

“I asked you a question, angel. Don’t ignore me.” Although his words are soft, his eyes completely contrast him.

He gives me a dark look, almost as if he’s daring me to defy him.  _ Well, let’s give the man what he wants, shall we? _

_ We may bottom but we never said it’d be easy. _

_ He’s hot but he can’t handle us. _

_ He doesn’t even know who we all are. _

_ He thinks we’re just cute and psycho. _

_ He hasn’t seen psycho yet. _

_ Let’s show this little bunny who’s really got the power here, hm? _

A deep chuckle leaves my lip as they stretch into a smile. I look at Jeongguk with innocent eyes as I slowly stick my tongue out, letting it run across my lower lip and his thumb. My smile turns into a smirk as I notice his eyes leaving mine and dropping to watch as I tug my lip between my teeth. Before he can meet my gaze again I push his hand away from my face and wrap my own around the back of his neck. I pull him down so that we are eye level, my other hand slipping beneath his jacket and resting on his hip.

“Do not tease me, Yeoubi. Only naughty boys tease, and naughty boys do not get acknowledged.” I tell him, my hand slipping to grasp his chin as he did mine. “Only good boys deserve to be addressed to.”

I watch the excitement fill his eyes and feel the slight shiver run through his body. His eyes close when I lean in, and I nearly laugh at the grunt of disapproval he makes when I only brush my lips over his. I step away from him after that, stepping around him and heading into the bathroom. My hips sway from side to side as I walk, my smirk deepening as I know the other is watching my movements. I grab onto the door frame to the bathroom, holding on as I use it to spin inside. Popping my head out of the door, I can’t help the slight, sadistic chuckle when I see Jeongguk still standing where I left him.

“Are you going to come here, or is my naughty Yeoubi going to keep me waiting as well?” I ask, feigning a pout.

Jeongguk turns to look at me, tongue poking the inside of his cheek before he finally gives me a smug look. I let my lips rise back into their smirk as he makes his way to me, leaning against the doorframe in front of me.

“Did I keep you waiting long, sweetheart?” He questions, keeping a soft tone but a mischievous look.

“Long enough.” I respond. “Take a seat.”

As he does so, I grab a comb and some hair gel before making my way to him. He lets me stand between his legs, his hands coming to rest on my hips.

“I see my little Yeoubi  _ does _ know how to follow orders. Maybe he isn’t all that naughty.” I tease.

“Maybe not.” The other mumbles. “What does that mean?”

“What does what mean?”

“That name you’ve been calling me. Yeoubi. What does it mean?”

“I’ll tell you when you need to know. Now stop talking, we’re on a very short time frame and you distract me too much.”

Jeongguk chuckles, but does as I say and stays silent as I style his hair. Instead of his far too old side part, I push all of his hair back, using the gel to keep it in place. Some strands don’t want to stay with the rest, falling in front of his face, but we really can’t waste anymore time so I call it day. I quickly wash my hands while Jeongguk grabs what he needs to, and I double check we have everything before we finally leave. The others are all waiting for us when we get to the front door, but at least we’re on time.

“Look who finally decided to show up. What the hell took you two so long? You’re never late.” Mark says as we approach.

“I bet they were fucking.” Jackson answers.

“We were not.” Both Jeongguk and I respond at the same time.

“Jinx! You owe me a soda!” I shout, nudging Jeongguk on the side.

The other rolls his eyes, smiling softly as he pushes me back.

“Whatever. Let’s head out now, we’ve already wasted enough time.” He announces.

“And whose fault is that, Yeoubi?” I ask quietly, loud enough only for Jeongguk to hear.

He gives me a sharp look to which I just chuckle, following beside him to our truck. We load up inside, and I sandwich myself between Jeongguk and the door. I don’t mind when he places his hand on my thigh, softly massaging my leg as he does something on his phone. Meanwhile I run a mental checklist through my head, making sure I’ve actually got everything done.

“Namjoon hyung, did you make sure to check the cameras before we left?” I ask, biting my thumb.

I’ve had hidden cameras set up in Revamp as well as either in or around the owner’s house and his close colleagues. I’ve been checking them recently for the past week or so, noting down their schedule and any anomalies I come across. Anything that could be detrimental towards us (which was little to none), I’ve taken note of and found a way to counter.

“Yes, there’s nothing out of the ordinary.” Namjoon answers from the passenger’s seat.

“And you’ve reviewed and made sure our emergency exits are clear?” I inquire.

“Yes, Taehyung.”

“Did you make sure to-”

“Tae, I did everything that was on the list and my own revisions, we’re good. You don’t need to worry, this is just a discussion about drug routes.”

“But Joonie, it’s not. If this were just about drug routes I would’ve sent Hobi and Jimin and Yoongi and I’s place. I’ve studied these guys for a while, long enough to know that they didn’t accept our invitation for drugs but for power. This is a display of power. That means we need to know everything we can about them and effectively take them out while still obtaining what we initially came for. You taught me that, remember?”

“You seem to remember it better than I do. Ah, I might just have to retire and let my apricity take over. What do you think, Yoongi?”

“I think that he should consider giving Tata up before he takes your place.”

My face turns red and I glare at the blonde. “Hey! Leave Tata out of this!” I shout.

“Who’s Tata?” Mark asks, and I can practically hear the smirk in his voice.

“Yoongi don’t you dare.”

“He’s Tae’s plushie, the one he’s had since- forever ago. I don’t even know where he got it from.”

“You still sleep with teddy bears, Tae?” Jackson teases.

“Shut up you Squirtle merch collector. You have no room to say anything. I don’t even sleep with Tata-”

“Anymore,” Yoongi interrupts. “You don’t sleep with him anymore.”

“You know what, Yoongi, since you want to tell everyone about Tata, how about I tell them about your love for Kumamon, hm?”

“Hold on a seco-”

“He loves Kumamon so much that for his 20th birthday we threw him a Kumamon themed party and even hired one of those party guys to dress as the bear and surprise him.”

“Okay that’s enough talking. Everyone shut the fuck up.”

Yoongi ends his sentence by turning on the radio, a random pop song playing. I smile in victory, but pause when I feel Jeongguk’s hand travel further up my thigh.

“You still sleep with plushies, baby?” He whispers in my ear.

“I swear to Satan, Jeon, if you tease me-”

“Tease you, darling? I was going to tell you how cute that is.”

I soften my glare some, turning to meet his gaze with a pout.

“You’re lying.” I mumble.

“What reason would I have for lying, angel?”

“To tease me more.”

“Only naughty boys tease, Taehyung.”

I smile a little, elbowing Jeongguk’s side a bit before dropping my head onto his shoulder.

“So, who is Tata and why have I not seen him before?” Jeongguk asks.

I chuckle a little. “Tata is a little alien, with a red heart shaped head and wears blue pajamas with yellow polka dots. I’ve had him since I was five, and I don’t sleep with him anymore, but I do when I’m super sad, hurt, or scared.”

“His name kind of reminds me of yours. Tata, Taetae, Taehyung.”

I smile sadly, intertwining my hand with Jeongguk’s hand softly squeezing.

“Mmm, it is…” I trail off.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing. It’s just that,” I pause, swallowing thickly before looking up at Gguk. “my baby sister named him.”

Before Jeongguk can respond, the car stops and Yoongi announces “we’re here”. I unbuckle my seatbelt and step out of the car, looking at our surroundings. Revamp is a pretty popular club, I suppose. It’s pretty large, lots of colorful lights. But with the amount of people getting roofied here and having shit done to them, I’d never step foot in here without a damn good reason. While everyone exits the truck, I take the time to gather myself and get into a more focused mindset.  _ Remember, no killing anyone unless absolutely necessary. _

_ Awww, but can’t we have a little bit of fuuuuun? _

_ Not tonight. _

_ We can’t even take a few home? _

_ After stage three of this mission we can choose all the play toys we want. _

_ Only if they can pass the trials. _

_ And after that we can go out and pick whatever little dollies we want. _

_ All the puppets we want. _

_ All the pain we could hope to cause. _

_ Just beat and break and tear them down. _

_ Hear their screams just fill the air. _

_ Oh the pleasure of watching the terror on their faces is enough for me to want to- _

“Why are you smiling like that?” I grunt in annoyance as Mark’s question stops my imagination.

“No reason, let’s go.”

I walk alongside Jeongguk again as we walk, hands in my pocket and face blank. We all walk straight past the bouncers, and I fight the urge to scrunch up my nose in disgust at the revolting smell of alcohol and sweat. Hoards of bodies, hardly concealed by their flimsy clothing, press closely against each other and shine beneath the flashing neon lights. I can feel the music vibrations in my body, my head nearly pounding at the obnoxious music.  _ I don’t even know why Jeongguk would want to trade in such a low level place. _ Nonetheless, I follow him through the sea of people, feeling repulsed by the vile hands touching me and trying to drag me into the mess of humans.

Jeongguk wraps his arm around my waist, pulling me against his much larger frame and glaring at anyone who gets too close.  _ I hate that he has to do this but I’m glad he did. It’d be bad if I broke a few bones before the meeting even began. _ He lets go of me when we finally reach the back staircase, the stairs leading to where the meeting takes place. The halls are dimly lit, and out of the many doors lining the walls come the sounds of far too over dramatic moans and groans of pleasure and skin slapping against skin. I cringe when I hear girls moaning, getting unpleasant memories I’d rather not think about at the moment.

After we get to the designated room, Jeongguk doesn’t even bother knocking. He simply opens the door and strides in, and I follow right behind him, maintaining an impassive composure. There are several men in the room, each with his own personal call girl by his side or on his lap. They sit at a large, round table that’s covered in alcohol, money, playing cards, and guns. I can’t fight the small look of disgust on my face as some of the men shamelessly makeout and grope the girls with them.  _ Pigs. They are truly pigs. _ I stand a little behind Jeongguk, but still make sure I have a clear view of the room. I know all of their names already, even the girls.

_ Why can’t we just kill them all and simply take this wretched sty over? _

_ Fuck if I know. It’d be better in my opinion. _

_ That’s why your opinion is currently invalid. We will lose more if all we do is control through murder and violence. _

_ Aren’t you more than likely to injure one of these guys in the next few minutes? _

_ Only if provoked or if Jeongguk orders me to. Violence shouldn’t always be the first answer. _

_ No, but it sure is fun. _

“Oh, would you look at that. The snakes have finally arrived.” One man, known as Sully, says, detaching his mouth from a young brunette’s neck.

_ Let me break his jaw. _

_ No. _

_ Please? _

_ No. _

_ Just a little bit, not the entire thing. _

_ No. _

_ Ugh, fine. _

Jeongguk says nothing, just stares at Sully. He soon backs down, averting his eyes to anywhere besides the mafia leader. Jeongguk’s footsteps are loud and steady as he crosses the room and takes a seat across from the man, hands resting on his lap. When the others and I start walking as well, several pairs of eyes turn to look at me, and I knew what was coming before they could even open their mouths to speak. So with a bored face I take my seat next to Jeongguk, crossing one leg over the other and awaiting the first person to speak.

“Oh ho ho, damn Jeon, where’d you get this one from? He’s pretty.” Sully speaks up yet again, and I don’t know which urge is stronger: to roll my eyes at the tacky line or stab him in the eye.

_ Stabbing him in the eye. Definitely. _

_ For sure. _

_ I second that. _

_ 100%. _

_ Okay guys that’s enough. _

“He is beautiful, isn’t he. Why don’t you introduce yourself, J?” Jeongguk tells me, the smirk evident in his voice.

_ I like this man. _

_ Lemme do it lemme do it lemme do it! _

“Shall I do it the bloody way, the violent way, the scary way, or the crazy way?” I ask with a slight growl, a smile creeping its way onto my face.

I notice some of the other’s eyes widen at my voice a few shift slightly in their seats.

“Hmm,” Jeongguk hums. “You choose.”

“Is there an-” Another man, Jaewoo, begins.

“Shhh,” I interrupt with a frown. “You do not speak unless spoken to.” Silence. “Good little piggies. I am going to tell you my name only once, so you’d do well not to forget it. I am Joker.”

Jaewoo scoffs. “Seriously? Like the playing card?”

“Like the person who’s been annihilating little rats such as yourself for the past couple of months, the person who police and thugs alike despise, the person who can find anybody and anything no matter where it is. Like the person whose name you should speak with both fear and respect because I can demolish your entire existence without batting an eyelash, and the person who your girl has been eye fucking since I walked in.”

Dumbfounded, Jaewoo stops talking and just stares. Grinning again, I advert my eyes to the jezebel on his lap and send her a wink. Her face flushes a bright red and she’s quick to look away, making me chuckle. A hand gripping my thigh beneath, however, has my laugh catching in my throat, though I quickly play it off. I uncross my legs, glancing down at Jeongguk’s hand and then at the man himself. He doesn’t look at me nor does he do anything other than hold my thigh.  _ Damn, he can’t even massage my leg like earlier? That shit felt good. _

Jeongguk clears his throat. “Let’s get down to business-”  _ To defeat the Huns _ . “-shall we?”

“Yes, right, business.” Sully, the group's leader, responds.

Immediately my attention is pulled to Jeongguk as he speaks, explaining what we want and what we have to offer in exchange. From what I learned before joining the Cobras, Jeongguk is not a man of negotiation. He merely takes what he wants - whether it be willingly or by force. This deal is definitely the work of Namjoon, I could tell his work from miles away, and I know that the contract Namjoon presents to the men is written so elaborately that we end up getting much more than what was verbally “agreed”. Jeongguk executes his portion effortlessly, almost as if it’s second nature.

He’s a snake, afterall, a man of charisma and charm and able to sweet talk anyone into doing what he wants. Everything had been going smoothly, everything a part of the plan. Which is why I wasn’t too surprised when Sully said-

“No.”

_ I will cut out his tongue. _

_ Dang man, chill. _

“Excuse me?” Jeongguk asks, sounding more annoyed than confused.

“Well, it’s just that we wouldn’t be profiting much from this, would we now? I mean, we are helping you out here, so shouldn’t we be receiving a little more?” Sully questions, a disgusting smirk on his face.

_ I-is he really trying to- bitch I know he ain’t. I know he ain’t. _

_ Bitch I think he is. _

_ Oh fuck no. Hold my muthafuckin hoops, let me teach this bitch a lesson. _

“You are just a means to an end, whether you  _ think _ you should be receiving more or not is relevant.” I calmly respond.

“Look, princess, I’m talking to Jeon, not you, so be a good little side piece and sit still and look pretty, yeah?”

_....what. _

Jeongguk removes his hand from my thigh, leaning back in his seat and clasping his hands in his lap. Namjoon coughs slightly and Yoongi chuckles to himself while I hear Jackson mumble an “oh shit” and Mark go “rip”. A wide smile erupts on my face and soon I find myself laughing hysterically.

“Side piece?! A fucking side piece?! Is that the best you could come up with?! Then again, I’m not surprised that your materialistic bird brains can only focus on money and looks! But if you wanna see a real fucking side piece why don’t I show you a side piece, huh?!” I roar, humor quickly turning to rage.

I quickly reach down to grab the gun strapped to my ankle, pulling it from it’s holster and aiming it at the girl who I winked at earlier. The loud  _ bang _ of the weapon is muffled to those in the club below, but loud and clear to me and everyone else in the room. Red blood slowly trickles down between the girl’s brows, a single bullet wound placed in the center of her forehead.  _ Bullseye! Bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye bullseye! Do it again! Do it again! _ The girl next to her screams, loud and high pitched, but it’s quickly cut off when I put a bullet in her head as well. I fire off several more rounds before anyone can move, each landing in the pretty girls’ heads.

“How’s that? Was that good enough for you or does your greedy little appetite want more?” I ask, calm once more.

It’s the slightest movement, a hand itching towards one of the guns laying idle on the table, that has me standing from my seat and raising my leg, kicking the table over.  _ It’s sssshow time, boys! _ The men scramble to their feets, my own team (except for Jeongguk) getting up as well and taking a few steps back. While they’re still distracted from the sudden action, I quickly vault over the table, now on the same side as they are. Jaewoo is the first to notice me, and rather than going for a gun next to his feet, he decides to try and punch me.  _ Let me bash his head into the wall! _

I dodge his punch, stepping to the side and grabbing the back of his head before slamming it into the table. I laugh at the sound it makes, finding it amusing and do it again.  _ More more more! I wanna see his brains spill out! _ I toss his unconscious body to the ground in time to evade a bullet and pivot around. I shoot at the person who shot at me, the bullet hitting him in the collarbone. He stumbles back against the wall, blood smearing against the cream colored walls as he slides down. Several others come at me and I quickly pull one of my knives from beneath my shirt.  _ Wanna play? Gonna play! Gonna make them scream my name! _

_ Nothing much to it, just a spin and a kick, and you do it again! _

_ A little punch and a slice of a knife makes everything nice! _

Small chuckles are heard over the screams as I swiftly beat everyone down. I don’t kill them, killing them would be much too boring. Instead I aim for places that would render them incapable of fighting (or even moving, for that matter) but still alive. Well, for now. Who knows if they’ll die without quick treatment? It’s not my problem. In a matter of minutes I’ve got everyone on the ground and covered in their own blood. The only one who is left conscious is Sully, the man on his knees and staring horror-stricken at his fallen members.

I grin at the sight, immense joy and satisfaction filling my being at his lowly state. I walk up behind him, gripping his hair and yanking his head back. He lets out a scream as I press the still hot tip of my gun to his temple, holding him tightly so that he can’t move.

“You,” I say, “you you you you  _ you _ . You seem to have no manners. Did your mother not teach you any? Or was she too busy whoring herself out to give two shits about a revolting creature such as yourself? You should be punished for such insolence.”

“Just kill me.” He grunts out, voice hoarse and words slurred.

“Kill you? Oh no no no no no. That would be far too forgiving for you. No, what I’m going to do is take a little trip across town and visit that little ex-wife of yours that ‘no one’ knows about. Miyoung is her name, isn’t it? A darling thing she is. And that little boy of hers, Changmin, what a cutie pie. He’s got your eyes, doesn’t he? Oh but what a shame it’d be if something happened to his mother. With no one to look after him he’d be put into foster care, what a horrible place to be in. Oh, I know, why don’t I just take him in-”

“No! Leave them out of this! Please! I beg of you! I’ll do anything you want, just leave them be!”

“Now  _ that _ is a risky thing to say, piglet. Are you sure about that?”

He pauses for a while, the gravity of the situation probably just now dawning on him.

“Yes. Yes I am. Just please, leave my family alone.”

I chuckle darkly. “Very well, then. But first, shall we go over the rules?” I don’t wait for a response. “Firstly, you will always look down when talking to Jeongguk. You do not deserve to look at him. Am I understood?”

“Yes.”

“That will be ‘yes,  _ Joker _ ’. Now repeat what I told you.”

“Yes, Joker. I will always look down when talking to Jeongguk. I do not deserve to look at him.”

“Secondly, you will not speak unless asked to, clear?”

“Yes, Joker.”

“Repeat it.”

“I will not speak unless asked to.”

“Thirdly, you will accept whatever Jeongguk gives to you - no matter how much or how little - and you will say thank you. You will  _ never _ ask for more.”

“Yes, Joker.”

“Repeat it.”

“I will accept whatever Jeongguk gives to me - no matter how much or how little - and I will say thank you. I will never ask for more.”

“And lastly, you will do whatever Jeongguk asks of you, no questions and no complaints. Repeat it.”

“Yes, Joker. I will do whatever Jeongguk asks of me, no questions and no complaints.”

I release his hair and move my gun from his head, smiling sadistically.

“Good piglet.” I coo, patting his head.

I walk over the fallen bodies and blood, not wanting to dirty my clothes any more than they already are. Jackson and Yoongi set the table back upright after I got Sully on his knees, and now the only thing that lays on top is the contract and a pen. Jeongguk sits in the exact same position I last saw him in, both a satisfied and prideful smirk on his face. His arm wraps around my shoulders when I sit next to him again, and I inwardly purr in content.

“Take a seat, Sully.” He says.

Sully gets up without a word, head bowed as he sits down across from Jeongguk. Laughter echoes in my head and I can’t stop a few giggles from leaving my lips.

“Sign the contract.” Jeongguk orders.

With shaking hands, Sully picks up the pen and signs where he needs to.

“Good. It was a pleasure working with you, Sully. I’ll be seeing you soon.” Jeongguk stands up after that, grabbing the contract from Sully.

“Thank you.” Sully tells him, making me smile even more.

I quickly put my weapons away before following Jeongguk out of the club, the older wrapping his suit jacket around me to cover the blood on my shirt.  _ Dammit, this is a white shirt too. _

_ Hydrogen peroxide and lemon juice to get blood out of clothes. _

_ Thanks. _

We file into the truck, the ride back home much quieter than the way here. My eyelids soon grow heavy, the energy I exhausted from the past month or so finally catching up to me. So you can’t exactly blame me for falling asleep in the truck, using Jeongguk’s shoulder as a pillow and his jacket as a blanket.


	26. 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yellow represents joy and friendship. Pink represents admiration, sweetness, and sympathy.

_ Taehyung _

Soft blankets and sheets surround me when I wake up, my arms wrapped tightly around a pillow. I blink back my tiredness, a small squeak disturbing the quiet atmosphere as I yawn. I look around the room a few times, having to squint a bit to see. I find myself in Jeongguk’s room, yet again, but there’s no Jeongguk with me. I unravel myself from the blankets and sit up, looking for my phone. The screen brightness has been turned down when I unlock it, a blessing for my eyes, and when I see that it’s nearing two I can already imagine where Jeongguk is.

I leave my phone on the nightstand and slide out of bed, shivering slightly as my feet touch the cold floor. The black sweatshirt I wear nearly reaches my knees, the material swallowing me whole. I pad my way out of the room, hugging myself as I head down the halls to the kitchen. I try not to squint when I turn on the bright, fluorescent lights, keeping my gaze slightly towards the ground. I grab two mugs from the counter, placing one beneath the Keurig machine and making coffee while I fill the other with milk and heat it in the microwave.

While I wait for the two to be done, I grab a metal tray and set a plate on top. I place an assortment of cookies I made the other day on top, neatly separating and stacking them. The coffee is finished first, and I set it directly on the tray, not adding anything to it. Once the milk is done, I take it out and mix a hot cocoa packet with it, plopping in a peppermint stick and setting it on the tray as well. I pick the tray up and shut off the lights on my way out. I carefully navigate my way around the mansion, being even more careful since I can’t see.

_ It’s a great thing I already know the entire layout. _

_ Stalking has its perks. _

I head to Jeongguk’s office, seeing faint light slipping from beneath the door when I get close. I cautiously open the door and quietly close it behind me, not wanting to scare Jeongguk. The older silently works on some papers, only the little lamps on his desk providing him with light.

“Ggu,” I softly call out, my footsteps making a little  _ pit pat _ sound as I walk up to his desk.

His eyes immediately flicker up to me when I call for him, a little smile growing on his lips as I get closer.

“Hey bun, what are you doing awake?” He asks quietly, pushing back in his seat and patting his lap.

I set the tray down in front of him before crawling onto his lap, humming in satisfaction as the raven holds me in place.

“I just woke up and saw you weren’t in bed. Figured you were working still. How much work do you have left?” Before he answers, I pick up my hot chocolate and hand him his coffee.

He mumbles a “thank you” and we both take a few sips of our drinks.

“I’m just getting everything ready so that we can start distributing in Revamp. I don’t want anything to worry about while we go through stage two of our primary mission.” Jeongguk explains as he picks up a cookie.

I nod in understanding, sipping my hot cocoa and trying not to doze off again.

“Baby, why don’t you go back to bed?” Gguk says, taking my hot cocoa from me and setting it on the desk.

I whine once the sweet beverage is taken from me, making grabby hands for it. Jeongguk chuckles, pressing a kiss to the back of my head before giving me my hot chocolate back. I immediately take it back, holding the warm cup in both hands.

“I’m okay,” I tell him. “I just need to get off of your lap and you to talk.”

“Huh?”

I laugh a bit at his confusion and the way he tries to hold onto me as I get up.

“Ggu, no, stop it. I’m gonna fall asleep if I stay on your lap.” I say with a giggle.

“Fine.”

He lets go of me, allowing me to fully get off of his lap and take a seat in the chair across his desk.

“So, what do you want to talk about?” He asks.

I shrug. “You choose the topic this time. I feel like I always talk.”

“I like listening to you talk.”

I blush slightly. “Just choose something,” I mumble.

“Cute. Okay then, I’ll choose. Let me think.”

I chuckle at the overdramatic thinking face he makes, a deep breath coming from the older as he crosses one leg over the other and rests his chin in his free hand. With a cheeky smile, I watch as Jeongguk stares at me with a pensive look and a small smirk.

“On a scale of one to ten,” He says, “how excited were you to beat down Sully and his men?”

“That’s your question?” I ask, cocking an eyebrow.

Jeongguk nods, sipping his coffee.

“Two, it wasn’t really exciting.” I answer.

“You seemed excited.”

“Trust me, I wasn’t. There isn’t much that makes me excited anymore. I’m just doing what I can to keep everyone satiated and make sure no one gives me any problems.”

“What does make you excited?”

I shrug, turning my attention to my hot chocolate as I think for a moment.

“There’s this one thing that pops into my head a lot, like one of those recurring thoughts you have before bed. It’s something that’s been on my mind for a while, maybe a year by now. But it’s something I have to wait to see, something that has to happen naturally, without my intervention.”

“What is it?”

I look back at Jeongguk, unaware of the small smirk on my face.

“I want to see you break.”

His eyes widen slightly before settling into a confused stare.

“What do you mean? Why?” He questions.

“I told you, Jeongguk. You and I are more alike than we seem. I can see it in the way you carry yourself, I can see it in your small movements when facing someone else, I can see it in your eyes every single day. I can see the excitement, the pleasure, the underlying bloodlust in your eyes when I play around. I can see the desire to do the same, to cause the same pain I do. Yet it’s only ever for a moment, a few seconds, and then it’s gone again. You never give into your demons, which is admirable, I suppose, but also sad. You could do so much more if you just let go.

“So yes, I want to see you break. I want to see you snap, I want to see you become reckless, I want you to show me just how powerful you are. I want to see you overwhelmed with a desire to kill, I want you to see red. I want you to see what I see, to know what I know, to feel what I feel. Because I know that you’re the only one who ever  _ could _ do those things. And besides, who doesn’t love a good mental break?”

“What makes you so sure I will break?”

“Everyone does at some point.”

“When did you break?”

I chuckle softly. “I was broken to begin with.”

“You aren’t broken, Taehyung. You’re just unique, a rarity that most don’t know how to treat properly.”

I try to hide my small blush, but by Jeongguk’s smirk I know he’s seen it.  _ He sees everything. _

_ Most of the time _ .

“Flattery will get you nowhere, Yeoubi.” I say.

“Perhaps not, but I get to make you blush which is more than enough.”

“Oh my gosh, you’re a tease.”

“I am not. I am a flirt.”

“What’s the difference, hm?”

“A flirt is not a tease, but a tease can be a flirt.”

“That makes no sense!”

“It makes perfect sense.”

“Does not!”

“Does too.”

“Does not!”

“Does too.”

“I am not doing this again, change the topic.”

Jeongguk laughs at my annoyance, setting his coffee cup on the desk.

“I’m gonna finish these up real quick and then we can go to bed, okay?” He tells me.

I nod, a few locks of hair falling into my face from the action.  _ I need a trim soon, this is getting bothersome. _ I snack on cookies while Jeongguk works, the silence comfortable around us.

_ I’m bored. _

_ Same. _

_ Can we take a nap? _

_ We’ll be back in bed soon, just wait. _

_ Ugh, what are we supposed to do until then? _

_ Let’s play a little game~ _

_ Ew, no, stop. _

_ Seriously? _

_ No, dude. Just no. _

_ I see you winding and grinding, up on that pole- _

_ Please don’t, I still think of Willy Wonka. _

_ He’s a bad nut. _

“Tae, do we have anything to do today?” Jeongguk’s question thankfully saves me from listening to the others’ conversation, and I quickly rack my brain for our schedule.

“Jackson’s set up everything for us to begin stage two whenever we please. I assume you want to start right away?” Jeongguk nods. “The soonest we can start is about two. Shall I go ahead and write up an itinerary for everyone?”

“Yes, please.”

I grab a notepad and pen and start writing down schedules for everyone to follow for today. Just like I’ve been watching Sully and his men for a few weeks, I’ve been watching the last group of the Triumvirate since this operation was put into place. I know where just about everyone has been, is going, and will go. Of course, there are a bunch of lower level lackeys I don’t keep tabs on, I just have someone else do it for me. I’ve almost finished making plans when Jeongguk stands up, taking me off guard.

“All done?” I ask as he stretches.

He nods, a small grunt coming from him. I flip the notepad shut, stuffing it into the joey pocket of my hoodie, and set the pen back on Jeongguk’s desk. Meanwhile, Jeongguk cleans up as well, taking a bit longer than me. When he’s done, he picks me up by the waist, making me giggle as I don’t even have to ask for upsies anymore, and carries me back to his room. I set the notepad on the side table, and then watch and wait for Jeongguk as he changes into a pair of sweats.

He hops down next to me, quickly getting beneath the covers before pulling me against him. My hand tangles in his hair, the other wrapped around his back, as he buries his face in the crook of my neck. Both of his arms encase my waist, and our legs entangle with each other. I slightly shiver at the feeling of his breath against my neck, but hum quietly in content as he places a few small kisses on my skin.

“Good night, Tae.” He whispers.

“Good night, Ggu.”

\---

_ Jeongguk _

  
  


“Ggukie? Where are my pink panties?” Taehyung shouts from the bedroom.

I finish tying on my tie, making sure it’s neatly tucked into my pink vest. Yes,  _ pink _ , and so is the tie. I hate the color pink, but Taehyung chose this outfit out for me, so I’m going to wear it. He said it matches what he’s wearing, but I haven’t seen what it is.

“Which ones? The lace, satin, or cotton?” I shout back, tucking my white button down into my matching pants.

“Lace!” Taehyung answers a moment later.

“In the top left drawer!”

I grab a comb and start styling my hair, pushing it completely back as Taehyung also requested.

“I don’t see them!” Taehyung tells me.

“Did you check in the back under the red shirt?” I question.

There’s a moment of silence, and then-

“Found them! Thank you!”

“Yup!”

After I finish my hair I brush my teeth and clean up, intending to leave when a black box catches my attention. I open it up, seeing the ring I had to wear when I first met the Rose. My lips upturn in a small smile as I slip it onto my finger, looking at it for a few moments longer before finally leaving the bathroom.

“Close your eyes!” Taehyung yells as soon as I open the door.

“Why?” I ask, closing my eyes anyway.

“Because I’m not ready. Give me ten minutes.” By the way his voice gets closer and further away, I figure he’s heading into the bathroom.

My guess is right when I hear a door shut and Taehyung scream “okay, you can open your eyes now”. I chuckle at his cuteness as I take a seat on the edge of the bed, scrolling through my phone as I wait for the younger to come out. I stare at my lockscreen for a while, smiling subconsciously at the image. It’s a photo of Taehyung sleeping on my chest from this morning, hair sprawled out and hands softly gripping my sides. His lips are slightly parted, eyes gently shut, unaware of the light seeping through the curtains and illuminating his figure. He woke up not too long after I took the photo, and we spent the next couple of minutes just laying in bed, not speaking much.

During our late breakfast Taehyung told everyone about today’s plans and gave them a specific set of instructions. Taehyung and I will be going to a cafe where one of the higher level member’s visits regularly, and then later tonight have dinner where a group of members will be having a meeting. We’ll be running around for the next few weeks, going out to stalk members and, as Taehyung put it, psych them out. After we ate, Taehyung and I came back up to my room to get ready, and that’s where I find myself now.

“Okay, I’m coming out.” Taehyung says a few minutes later.

I shut my phone off and slip it in my wallet, turning to look at the bathroom door. It opens rather slowly, but when I finally see Taehyung my breath catches in my throat. The top half of his hair is pulled back, the ends curled slightly. His face is bare except for the small bit of highlighter, mascara, and lip gloss, and a gold lip ring clings to his lower lip. He’s dressed in a light pink dress with a black trim along the sleeves and the end of the dress. A black bow wraps around his slim waist, illuminating his figure, and the dress itself ends just above his knees. Black flats adorn his feet, and he carries a small black purse around his shoulder.  _ Who allowed him to be so pretty? _

“You look beautiful, Tae.” I tell him, standing up.

His cheeks redden and he bashfully looks down, hands toying with the end of his dress.

“Y-you sure? M-my arms and l-legs aren’t too muscular? I-I’ve been working out a lot.” He says shyly, voice so quiet I nearly miss it.

“Sweetheart, muscles or not you’re still stunning. It doesn’t matter what you wear or how fit you are, you’re gorgeous.” I respond. I cup his cheeks and lift his face to meet mine. “You are beautiful, Taehyung.”

His face turns bright red and he lets out a whine as he grabs onto my hands.

“You’re such a sap, go away.” He mewls, making me chuckle.

“No,” I peck his lips, “I don’t think,” peck, “I will,” peck, “go away.” Peck. “Besides,” peck, “you love sappy moments.” Peck. “Let’s leave now, yeah?” Peck, peck, peck.

Taehyung’s face resembles a ripe tomato by now, his entire face flushed red and lips slightly puckered as he awaits more kisses. I chuckle, kissing him one last time before grabbing his hand and lightly tugging him along. We make sure we have everything before heading downstairs. I was hoping we’d be able to make it to the garage without being seen. Taehyung may look gorgeous in pink but  _ I _ do not, I feel like an idiot, and I know if anyone sees me I will never hear the end of it. But things just had a way of not ending up the way I wanted them to.

“Oh my God, Jeongguk, are you wearing pink?” I hear Eunae shout as we pass the kitchen.

I stop in my tracks, visibly taking a deep breath.  _ It’s fine, this is fine, everything is fine. _ Apparently I took more time gathering myself than I thought, because I feel Taehyung placing his hand on my shoulder and giving me a worried look. I send him a reassuring smile before turning to look at my sister, as well as some members of both Got7 and the Rose.

“What other color would I be wearing? Orange?” I sarcastically ask with a raised eyebrow, daring her to say something more.

“Whoa, easy there, big guy.” Eunae says with a chuckle, holding her arms up in surrender. “We’ve just never seen you in pink before.”

“Well now you have. Don’t forget you have a job to do. Now if you’ll excuse us, we have somewhere to be.”

Taehyung and I leave after that, the younger not complaining as I walk quickly. He doesn’t speak until we’ve gotten into the car and started driving.

“Are you and your sister close?” He randomly asks.

“Hm? Oh, uhm, not really, no. Why?”

He’s quiet for a moment. “I get weird vibes around her.”

“What do you mean?”

Silence. “I’m not quite sure. There’s just something.......unsettling about her.” More silence. “They like to get loud when she’s near, antsy almost.”

I frown slightly. I may not be very close with Eunae, but I know her enough to know that there’s nothing about her to make Taehyung feel that way.

“Is it because she tried to get with you?” I question.

“No, that doesn’t bother me. Ah, forget I said anything. I’m just being paranoid. It’s probably because I haven’t really got to know her.” Taehyung quickly dismisses the issue and I don’t press it.

If it’s something that’s really bothering him he’ll tell me.  _ He’ll tell me, won’t he? _ The rest of the drive is quiet, though not in a bad way. It takes us a bit of time to get to the cafe as it’s practically on the other side of the city, but when we arrive the person we’re looking for isn’t there yet. I park the car and get out before Taehyung, opening the door for him.

“Thank you.” He says softly before hooking his arm around mine.

“You’re welcome.” I respond while leading us to the cafe door.

A little bell rings once I open the door, allowing Taehyung to walk in first. The smell of coffee beans smacks me in the face as I follow behind Taehyung.

“I’ll order for us, go find a seat.” I tell Taehyung.

He nods and walks off while I head to the front counter. There’s a few people in front of me already, so I take my time looking at the menu while waiting for my turn.

“Next!” The barista calls after a couple of minutes.

I step up to the counter, ignoring the way the barista oh so obviously checks me out.

“I’ll have a medium black coffee, a large mocha frappe, a slice of chocolate cake and a slice of strawberry shortcake.” I order.

The girl hurries and copies my order down before giving me a poor excuse of a flirtatious smile.

“And your name?” She asks.

“Yeoubi.”

“Okay, your total is-”

I cut her off by sticking my card into the chip reader, waiting for it to say the action’s been authorized before taking it back.

“H-hey w-wait! Y-your receipt!” The girl stammers when I start to walk away.

I hold back a sigh and grap the slip of paper from the blushing girl, actually sighing when I see the number written on the back. I simply crumble it up, tossing it in the trash before finding Taehyung. The blonde sits at a window seat, legs crossed and head perched on his palm as he looks out the window. He looks up when I sit across from him, soft smile soon turning into a small frown.

“You okay? You seem irked.” He says, worry evident in his voice.

I shake my head lightly and reach across the table to grab his free hand, interlacing our fingers.

“I’m fine, just got hit on by the barista is all.” I explain, making him chuckle.

“You’re handsome, it’s bound to happen.” He glances at the barista who looks at us with envy in her eyes. “She’d be prettier without the jealousy. Sure you don’t wanna take her out on a date? I can clear your schedule.”

“No thanks, I don’t date.”

“Still scared of love, my little Yeoubi?”

I roll my eyes at both the question and his teasing tone.

“I’m not scared of love.” I state.

He just laughs, eyes closing and nose cute scrunching.

“What about you?” I ask once his laughing has died down. “Are you afraid of love?”

He pauses for a moment, pondering the question. His gaze turns back towards the window, a thoughtful look in his eyes.

“I am not afraid of love, I love my family after all. But I suppose I am afraid of some of the things that come with it, whether it be for a friend or a lover.” He admits.

“What kind of things are you afraid of?”

“Opening up, for one. Showing a person all of my cards and expecting them to stay is pretty hard, if you haven’t realized. Accidentally snapping on them or hurting them during one of my episodes or spikes is another. Trusting them wholeheartedly, with every part of me. That alone is something that’s difficult in our lives, but with mine specifically it’s harder. And once that trust is broken, it’s damn near impossible to repair.”

“How do you do it?”

“Do what?”

“Love your family as openly as you do and not worry about whether or not someone will use that against you.”

“Who said I don’t worry? I’d be a fool if I didn’t. But I told you; love is a fool’s weakness, but a wise man’s strongest weapon. My family and I are strong because we love each other, because we understand and relate to each other on a different level. That love won’t protect us from everything, but at least we know we won’t ever be alone. Whatever comes our way, we can survive it because we have each other. That’s how love is supposed to work. At least it is in my opinion.”

“You have interesting views.”

Taehyung chuckles, turning away from the window to face me.

“A person’s views are shaped by their life experiences. For someone like me, who started with nothing, but gained more than anything riches could buy, I have a lot to lose, and therefore everything to protect. I am a selfish person, Yeoubi, what is mine is mine forever, I will not let it go so easily. My most prized possession is the love I receive from those around me, so I will do whatever it takes to keep them safe. My loyalties will always lie with them. I will kill anyone who tries to harm them or take them from me.” He says.

A strange yearning sensation builds up within me, the desire to do something making my heart race, but I don’t know what that  _ something _ is.

“That was very yandere of you to say.” Is what I reply, even though my mind is racing with so many more things to say.

Taehyung smiles. “You have no idea.”

“Order for Yeoubi!”

I go grab our orders, completely ignoring the girl who keeps trying to flirt with me.  _ Honestly, she sees I’m here with someone, she should save herself the embarrassment and stop. _ After sitting back down, Taehyung and I enjoy our afternoon snack while talking, keeping an eye out for the person we initially came here for. He, thankfully, comes not too long after we get our orders and takes the table just beside ours.  _ I guess after studying him for so long, Taehyung knew where he’d sit and picked out a table nearby. _ The plan was simple: drop subtle yet noticeable enough innuendos to both of our groups.

It was interesting, slipping as many puns into our conversation as possible and watching the man’s reaction. He was no doubt listening to us, eyes not so secretly darting towards Tae and I every five seconds. When he finally leaves (practically dashing out of the door) with his phone to his ear, Taehyung lets out a loud laugh, grabbing some people’s attention. He quickly apologizes, still laughing, and I watch him, unaware of the fond look on my face.

“I’m,”  _ hick, _ “s-sorr-”  _ hick _ , “-ry.”  _ Hick _ . “T-that w-was-”  _ hick _ , “t-too f-funny.”  _ Hick _ . “D-did you s-s-”  _ hick _ , “see his f-face?”  _ Hick _ . “H-he l-look-”  _ hick _ , “-ked so s-scared.”  _ Hick _ .

I smile as he cutely hiccups and stutters his words.

“I’m going to get you some water.” I say, standing up.

I quickly order a small water for him, partially thankful for the new barista who doesn’t hit on me. I give the water to Taehyung who immediately takes a gulp and holds it in his mouth. He has to take a few more sips from time to time, having spit small bits out from hiccuping and face turning redder and redder everytime. I merely chuckle, smiling at how adorable he is. He gives me a big, boxy smile when he’s finally stopped hiccuping and swallowed the water.

I inwardly fawn over his cuteness, unable to help myself from leaning over the table and pecking his lips, telling him how cute he is as I sit back down. The embarrassed look on his face afterwards makes me smile. We leave not too long after that, having a lot of time on our hands before we need to get to the next place.

“What do you want to do for now?” I ask him, one hand on the wheel and the other grasping his thigh.

“There’s a dog park nearby. Can we visit?”

“Sure.”

Taehyung gives me directions to the dog park, and as soon as the car stops Taehyung jumps out. I quickly follow after him, mentally reminding myself to  _ always _ bring the cuffs so Taehyung doesn’t do things like this. But when I find him, sitting on the ground with a tiny pomeranian dog in his lap, a husky licking his cheek, and a golden retriever excitedly running around him my slight frustration almost instantly disappears.

I take my time walking up to him, enjoying just watching him play with the dogs with the biggest smile on his face and laughter coming from him. After a couple of minutes of just watching him, I tear my gaze away and finally look at our surroundings. There aren’t too many people near us, but a lot of dogs and open space. Most people are near the shops across the street, browsing their racks and shelves or just window shopping. Just as I’m about to turn away, I notice a small shop nearby that catches my attention.

“J, I’ll be right back. Don’t leave here, yeah?” I say, looking back at Tae.

He looks at me with Bambi eyes, quickly nodding before the golden retriever steals his attention again. I can’t help but smile again before turning and heading towards the shop I saw. The outer decor is quite simple, but charming, and the inside is much better. Different kinds of flowers, plants, seeds and gardening tools fill the relatively empty store, the plants neatly placed and ordered. I walk up to the counter, looking at flowers from time to time. An old woman sits at the counter, her back to me as she works on something. I clear my throat to gain her attention and she turns around, giving me a large smile.

“Good afternoon, young man. What can I do for ya?” She asks sweetly.

“Do you happen to make flower crowns?”

“Why yes I do. Any specific flowers you want?”

“Yellow and light pink roses, please.”

“Coming right up. You just sit tight.”

She heads off to another part of the store and I find a place to sit. I use my phone to pass the time, first sending a text to Taehyung to let him know I’ll be back in a few minutes. I spend the next few minutes going through emails and unread messages, reading some and deleting the rest. Around ten minutes later the old woman comes back, holding the crown in her hands.

“Is this good for you or do you want something else added?” She questions.

“This is perfect, thank you. How much?”

She quickly rings up the crown for me and I pay just as fast, eager to get back to Taehyung. I bid the old woman a goodbye as I leave the store and head back to the park. Taehyung is in the same exact spot that I left him in, still energetically playing with the dogs. I hide the flower crown behind my back, not wanting him so see it just yet. His head perks up when I get near, and when he sees me he jumps to his feet, not minding the dogs that trail after him.

“You’re back, Yeoubi!” He says, beaming widely at me.

“I told you I would be.”

“But you took so long! Where did you go?”

“Secret, but I have something for you. Close your eyes.”

Taehyung giggles as he shuts his eyes. I grab both of his hands and hold them out, palms up, before setting the crown on top of them.

“Okay, open your eyes.” I tell him.

His eyes flutter open and he lets out a squeal as he looks at the flower crown.

“I l-l-love i-it! Th-thank y-you so m-much!” He exclaims before throwing his arms around me.

I chuckle, telling him “you’re welcome” as I hug him back. He puts the crown on once the hug ends and grabs my hand, tugging me to play with the dogs. Yet I can’t help myself from occasionally looking at the younger and the flowers sitting on his head, smiling to myself.  _ Yellow roses mean joy and friendship. Light pink ones represent admiration, sweetness, and sympathy. _


	27. 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a date.

_ Jeongguk _

“A-ah, Y-Yeoubi, st- ahhh- stop it. P-please, it h-hurts.” Taehyung moans, trying to wiggle away from me.

I hold him in place, giving him a slight glare before working my hands against his soft skin again.

“Stop moving or it’ll hurt more.” I tell him, ignoring his pleas to stop.

“Y-Yeoubi~ Mmmnnn, p-please. H- nnggg- hurts.”

“If you listened to me when I told you to stop earlier this wouldn’t be happening. This is your punishment. Now be a good boy for me, hm?”

“Mmm, I-I’ll be Y-Yeoubi’s g-good boy, ahhh. Sh-shit, there! Mmph, oh my satan, p-please.”

I smirk at the sounds he makes as I push harder, the younger whining and begging even more. I hike his leg onto my shoulder, slightly amazed at how flexible he is. A few more minutes pass, the younger’s face flushed and covered in a thin layer of sweat. His mouth is parted open, head leaning back against the back of the bench (yes, we’re still in the park, just somewhere more secluded). I slow down my movements, soon coming to a complete stop and waiting as Taehyung calms down.

“Has your cramp gone away now?” I ask, softly rubbing his thigh.

We were playing with the dogs when some of them decided they wanted to play fetch. Taehyung, of course, got up to play with them while I watched nearby. I warned him to be careful running around the way he was unless it was his intention to hurt himself. Taehyung kept running regardless and ended up with a bad cramp in his leg, so I carried him to where we wouldn’t be disturbed and massaged his leg.

“Y-yeah, thank you.” Taehyung answers quietly, letting out a particularly high pitched whine when I knead into his inner thigh.

I raise an eyebrow. “Sensitive?”

“S-shut up.”

I chuckle and let his leg down before helping him stand up.

“We should start heading to the restaurant now, it’s pretty far away.” I say.

Taehyung nods, still quite shy, and holds my hand as we head back to the car.

“Don’t be shy now, darling. You were so vocal just a few minutes ago, I’d be surprised if no one heard you.” I tease.

“It felt good, leave me alone.” Taehyung mumbles, moving to cuddle into my side like a cute, clingy baby.

“Whatever you want, bun.”

We make short conversation as we head to the car, and once inside, Taehyung turns on the radio. He sings lightly along with the music and plays with my hand on his thigh, his gaze pointed out of the window. It’s nearing six when we arrive at the restaurant, yet still as bright as if it were midday. Taehyung and I walk up to the doors arm in arm, the building not quite as nice as Kaleidoscope yet more expensive. Taehyung doesn’t pay any heed as I talk to a waiter about our reservation, he’s too invested in looking around the restaurant and it’s customers.

Therefore, he doesn’t notice it when the waiter sends him flirtatious looks and constantly looks at the younger.  _ I swear to Satan, he can see we’re together yet he still tries to flirt. If he doesn’t stop I will gouge his eyes out for looking at something that doesn’t belong to him _ . It’s without much thought that I grab Taehyung by the waist and pull him flush against my body, his face in my chest. He isn’t bothered by my sudden actions, but instead goes with it and wraps his arms around my shoulders. He places a gentle kiss to my jaw before resting his head on my shoulder, peering up at me with soft eyes.

“What’s wrong, Yeoubi? You look peeved again.” He whispers.

“I’m fine, darling.” I respond after pecking his forehead.

He chuckles. “You’re lying, Yeoubi. Don’t tell me, then, I will find out later.”

“I look forward to it.”

“Or you could just tell me~”

“No.”

“Hehe, it was worth a shot.”

He cutely holds onto me while still looking around, reminding me of a small puppy getting used to its new surroundings. Someone clearing their throat grabs my attention, yet Taehyung pays it no mind, just continues surveying the area. I look up at the waiter, lips twitching upwards in a slight smirk when I see the envious look in his eyes.

“Dinner for two for Yeoubi?” He asks.

“That’s us.” I respond.

He nods, grabbing two menus and gesturing for Taehyung and I to follow him. I guide the younger by the waist, and internally fawn over his cuteness as he holds onto my vest just to be sure he doesn’t get too caught up while looking around. The waiter brings us to a booth near the back of the restaurant, all but tossing the menus on the table before leaving, hurriedly telling us he’ll be back to take our orders.

“Well, he’s not very nice.” Taehyung says as he slides into the booth.

“No, he isn’t.”

I take my seat next to Taehyung and set the cloth napkin they gave us across my lap.

“I don’t see how you could’ve been jealous of him, you’re much nicer than he is.”

I pause for a moment, thinking “ _ what _ ” to myself before it clicks, and I turn to look at Taehyung with a raised eyebrow.

“Jealous? I was not jealous.” I state.

“Hm? No? Are you sure? I saw the little smirk you gave him when you were holding me.”

“I was  _ not _ jealous.”

“Well, if not jealous, then possessive, am I wrong?”

I stop again, simply giving Taehyung a blank look before picking up the menu and looking through the dishes. Taehyung laughs, picking up his own menu and looking through it as well.

“You didn’t deny, Yeoubi.” He teases.

“I didn’t admit anything, either.”

“Just say it, Yeoubi. No point in hiding what can already be seen. You didn’t like the way he was looking at me.”

“How would you know how he was looking at you? You weren’t paying attention.”

“I notice everything, Yeoubi, no matter if I’m directly looking at it or not. Besides, it’s not that difficult to tell when someone wants to fuck you. Say it, Yeoubi~”

I sigh, looking over the top of the menu to look at Taehyung and the cheeky smirk he wears.  _ This little one needs to learn manners. _

“You won’t be satisfied until I admit it, will you?” I question despite already knowing the answer.

“ _ No _ .”

I shut my menu, setting it down somewhat harshly. Taehyung lets out a small, almost unheard, squeak when I grab the back of his neck and pull him so that I can speak directly into his ear, careful as to not hurt him.

“Yes, little kitten, I didn’t appreciate the way he looked at you. He should have not looked at what does not belong to him, furthermore he should have realized that you’re here with someone and not on the market. Is that what you wanted to hear, kitty?”

“Is that what you wanted to say, sir?” Taehyung retorts.

“You are a brat.” I let go of him, yet he still stays right next to me.

“You like it. Anyhow, where’s the fun in being nice all of the time? And if it really bothered you, you’d punish me, wouldn’t you?”

“You  _ want _ to be punished, so no.”

“Oh? So you’ll just let me do whatever I want?”

“There are other ways to make you behave.”

“Oooh, do tell.”

I chuckle at the suggestive look on Taehyung’s face and the way he wiggles his eyebrows.

“I’m good. Now look at the menu, order whatever you want.” I tell him.

“Ooh hoo hoo, get you a man who lets you order whatever you want and pays for it all.”

“What?”

Taehyung giggles, lips stretching into a wide smile though he bites his lower lip to try and stop it.

“Nothing, nothing.” He says quickly, still giggling to himself.

“You’re extra hyper today.” I note as I pick up my menu again.

“Yeah, why? Does it bother you?”

“No, it doesn’t. It’s just been a few days since you’ve been this hyper, you’ve been focussing a lot on the mission lately.”

Taehyung doesn’t respond right away, and from the corner of my eyes I see him shrug while opening his menu.

“Well, you gotta work hard if you wanna play hard, y’know? I can’t possibly expect to stay on top if all I do is fuck around. Plus, now it’s not just five other people I’m looking out for, and I’d rather not lose any unnecessary pawns.” He explains, his demeanor almost completely flipping from lighthearted and childish to serious and thoughtful.

“I still don’t understand how quickly you can change your behaviour.”

“Same.” He pauses. “Party rockers in the house tonight. Everybody just have a good time. And we gon’ make you lose your minds. We just wanna see you....... _ shake that _ .”

“Taehyung what the fuck?”

“Bro, I don’t even fucking know. I literally feel like I just drank a coffee, five hour energy, and red bull at once and I’m ready to  _ fight God _ . Like I feel like I’m ready to just full on body slam someone, perform an entire concert, sleep for a week, and then maybe summon a demon. All in that order.”

“Did you eat something we- oh.”

“Oh? What oh? Good oh? Bad oh? Oh from Home?”

“No, Taehyung, calm down. I said ‘oh’ because I remembered you had a latte earlier. You don’t usually drink coffee or anything with a lot of caffeine because you get extra hyper.”

“Oh, that’s right, I do. I forgot, hehe.”

I lightly shake my head, finding hyper Taehyung extra cute and random.

“I’ll be careful of what I get you from now on. Now, do you know what you want to order?” I ask.

“Ummm, I actually don’t know. Can you order something for me?”

“Sure.”

A few minutes later and a new waiter comes to our table and takes our order before leaving us alone again. Taehyung and I talk about random things while we wait, the conversation ranging from cats with mustaches to whether or not Jack could have fit on the piece of driftwood with Rose (we both know he could’ve). More and more people soon begin filing inside the restaurant, the place becoming rather busy for dinner rush.

“Hey, you know what I realized?” Taehyung says after we’re served our drinks and appetizers.

“What?”

“This is kind of like a date. Well, if we weren’t here on business it would be. But still, it’s like we’re on a date.”

“It is, isn’t it? Well, are you enjoying this date?”

“I am, very very much. Are you?”

“I am. Have you been on many dates before?”

“Not really, most of them were just friendly dates with the others. Joonie used to take me on dates when we were younger, before we both started getting so busy. What about you?”

“I’ve been on a few, but not a lot.”

“What would your ideal date be?”

“My ideal date?”

“Mhm.

“I’m not sure. I never thought about it.”

“I know what mine would be, although it’s a bit silly.”

“What is it?”

“Well......I want to go ice skating.”

“Oh?”

He nods, a shy smile on his face.

“I’ve wanted to go for a while, but I don’t know how to skate, and since it’s a winter thing we can only go in the winter. Problem is that we usually always get swamped with work in the winter, so I’ve never gone before.”

“Then we’ll go. You and I.”

Taehyung’s reaction to my words is instantaneous. His entire face brightens up, and his eyes appear to glow like neon lights, little specks of gold dancing around his irises. The lighting manages to fall on him just right, and the small bit of highlighter he wears makes his skin shimmer.

“You mean it?” He asks, trying to hold his excitement but failing.

“I wouldn’t have said it if I didn’t.”

“Pinkie promise?”

I smile gently and wrap my pinkie around his. Our thumbs gently pad together, and lips brush against the back of them.

“I promise.” I whisper, drowning in the younger’s stare, unaware of the way my heart begins to beat faster.

A smile takes over Taehyung’s face, one so large he’s unable to keep his eyes open, and, before I know it, he’s cupped my cheeks in his hands and planted his lips on top of mine. I can taste the sweet chapstick on his lips and the faintest traces of his soda, and I have the strongest urge to taste more, but he’s already pulled away before I can.

“Thank you, Yeoubi.” He says, his breath fanning over my lips.

“You don’t have to thank me, darling.”

Taehyung just smiles, pecking my cheek before averting his attention to somewhere in the restaurant. A few seconds after he does, his head slightly perks up and he looks back to me, another excited look on his face.

“They’re here, finally.” He tells me.

I take a quick glance around the restaurant, noticing a few familiar faces being led to the booth next to ours.

“About time they showed up. I was beginning to think we’d have to do this in the middle of our meal.” I say quietly.

“Same. You ready?”

“Mhm, you?”

“Yup.”

And so it began again; Taehyung and I talking loud enough for our words to be heard, but not loud enough to be considered rude, and slipping as many innuendos into our conversation as possible. I was quite shocked, to be honest, at how many Taehyung was able to come up with, but then again I suppose because of how much time he’s spent with Namjoon he’s learned a lot. However, even on his own, Taehyung is brilliant, so I can’t say that all of his knowledge came from Namjoon. When our food finally arrived, I couldn’t help but keep telling Taehyung how adorable he is when he eats.

His cheeks get cutely puffed up, like a little chipmunk, and his lips fall into a small pout. He’s a bit of a messy eater, small crumbs and dashes of sauce sticking to the corner of his lips from time to time, all of which I clean off with my thumb. Unlike the man from the cafe, this group doesn’t run off as they listen to our conversation. Although both Taehyung and I can see the way they often glance towards us and shift uncomfortably in their seats as they try to carry on with whatever business they initially came for. After we’ve finished eating and I’ve paid for our meals, Taehyung and I leave.

The ride home is quiet, the younger slightly dozing off as we drive. He manages to stay awake until we reach my room, and he makes a beeline for the restroom. I chuckle when he comes back out not even a minute later to set his flower crown on the nightstand, mouth wide open in mid-yawn. He waddles his way back into the bathroom, and a few moments later I hear the shower running. I change out of my clothes, glad to get rid of the pink, and pull on a pair of grey sweats and a matching hoodie. I flop onto the bed, grabbing my phone and checking through notifications. Taehyung comes back out after sometime, sitting on the edge of the bed as he lotions himself.

“Gguk, can you get my back, please?” He questions.

“Sure.”

I set my phone aside and move behind the smaller and take the lotion from him. I warm the sweet smelling lotion in my hands before rubbing it gently into Taehyung’s back. I notice a few knots in his back and carefully massage them out, earring soft moans and whimpers of satisfaction from the other. I stop when I see that he’s about to fall asleep, earning me a small whine in return.

“Let’s get you dressed, yeah?” I quietly ask, rubbing the remaining bit of lotion into my hands.

Taehyung merely nods, eyes half closed.

I grab him a pair of underwear and one of my hoodies and quickly dress the younger in them before laying him beneath the covers. He whines again when I move away, and I quickly silence him with a kiss. That keeps him somewhat satisfied long enough for me to plug our phones in and turn off the lights before lying next to him. His body fits perfectly against mine, his head resting snuggly in the crook of my neck and fists clutching at my hoodie. I hold him close to me, my hand carding through his hair as I fall asleep.

The days fly by after that, each day more hectic than the last as we run all over the city and get things ready for the final stage. Most days, Taehyung and I rarely see each other, however, every single night he manages to make it to my office with a cup of coffee for me and some sort of warm beverage for himself as well as whatever desert he made recently. We spend the time talking, usually about what we did for the day, but other things as well. But during the times where I don’t see him, a strange, empty feeling occupies my being - a feeling of being incomplete.

_ I had become addicted to the young Joker, and I didn’t even notice. _

No, no I’m not addicted. I’ve just grown used to him being around, there’s a difference. I am not addicted to Taehyung.

I am not.

“Jeongguk!” A familiar voice shouts my name.

My snaps up, eyes befalling onto Taehyung and  _ fuck, he looks good in my clothes. _ He wears a white turtleneck shirt beneath one of my navy button downs, the top several buttons undone and both shirts rolled up to his elbows. Both are tucked into a pair of khakis, a black belt cinching his waist. Parts of his hair are braided, white ribbons entwining with the golden braids. A pair of circular glasses are perched on his face, and a fountain pen rests behind one of his ears. He holds a binder to his chest as he gives me a slightly concerned look, head tilted to the side.

“Yes?” I inquire after looking him up and down.

“Are you okay? I called your name several times and you didn’t answer.” He says.

“I’m okay, thank you. I was just thinking. Do you need anything?”

“Ah, I just came to tell you that we’re ready.”

“Ready? For what?”

He playfully rolls his eyes, smiling a bit.

“Jeez, were you so deep in thought that you forgot what we’re working on? What were you thinking of, Yeoubi? I hope it was me.” He teases with a chuckle. “We’re ready to start the final stage. Everything has been set up, we can start as soon as this Friday, if you say the word.”

There was no chance of me not saying the word. Not with Taehyung looking at me with barely concealed excitement and anticipation.  _ I have to give him what he wants. _

“Well then, get the men prepared for Friday.” I order.


	28. 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wack-a-mole just got deadly

_ Taehyung _

The estate had been buzzing with excitement since the order had been given; the order to commence all plans for stage three and get rid of the last group. It was more of a waiting game for me, having long ago taken care of my duties, and now only checking in from time to time to check in on things. I couldn’t help but spend my time exercising and day dreaming away, thinking of all of the things I could do, all the games I could play. Thinking about it would send a rush of excitement through me, so electrifying and conquering that my body would shake and tremor beyond my control, and more than often I’d speak with a stutter.

I didn’t want to find a temporary play toy to calm my excitement. No, they’d never satisfy me enough. Because of this, I also found myself partially slipping into a different headspace. One that's not completely bad, but also not too safe for others either. Although, that is comparing it to my other headspaces, and those compared to any other person, they’re all considered dangerous and wild and so much more. I suppose in this one, you could classify me as “cute and psycho”. Extra heavy on the psycho. Mayhaps I’d do things I shouldn’t.

Such includes: randomly stabbing objects (such as pillows, walls, paintings, and even people, but with dull objects - nothing that would break through the skin or cause internal damage), cutely threatening to torture and/or kill anyone (Jeongguk actually went back and forth with me regarding threats for a while a few times), small woodland creatures “mysteriously” and “strangely” ending up near the mansion, dead, overstepping personal boundaries often (no one will ever know if they’re on purpose or accident because of my “normal” behavior).

Not to mention behaving irrational and recklessly, not just limited to myself but to others as well (I may or may not have jumped out of a window and I may or may not have dragged Jimin with me). Oh, and also the odd moment where my inner ramblings would spill from my lips without intent and those around me would instantly become unnerved and uncomfortable (except for Jeongguk, who would then add his own tidbit into my monologues, and Namjoon, who is the most used to my random bouts of apprehensive spiels). The closer it got to the day of the operation, the deeper and more often I’d slip.

It was much to everyone’s delight, including my own, that the night of the operation finally came. Tonight we have something very special, yet something we’d never done before, planned for _everyone_. I get ready alone in my room, having sent everyone away while I was still somewhat sane in case I get too excited. I dress myself in a wine purple colored cropped tank top and black high waisted booty shorts. We’re supposed to go for a more casual look tonight, something to showcase personality for our special special show (it, surprisingly wasn’t my idea, but Jin hyung’s). Black knee high socks cover my legs, just barely seen beneath a pair of black knee high buckle up boots. Before doing anything else, I strap on my array of knives and daggers, carrying only a single gun since one; I don’t have many, and two; I prefer knives.

I quickly, yet meticulously, do my hair; braiding some of it back so that it stays out of my way. Once hair is out of the way I go back to my room, grabbing a two toned black and purple leather jacket and pulling it on as I leave the room completely. With a whistle on my lips and a hop in my step, I mindlessly play with a knife as I skip my way to the garage where the others should already be heading. There’s not many down there when I arrive, I always arrive earlier than everyone. What can I say? I like being ahead.

I climb into my designated van, mind racing with thoughts that I don’t bother trying to contain. The rave inside my brain edges me on, uncontrollable laughter and dark statements spoken with the utmost normality and humor - though completely serious despite the hilarity. Soon the excitement bubbles and bubbles until, like a heating teapot, my body can slowly no longer contain it. An irksome _itch_ nags at my hands and the inability to stay _still_ takes over my body as I continuously toss and twist and weave my knife around, playing with it and twisting it around my fingers as one would with a pencil. And then _oh_ -

I want to stab someone.

 _Fuck_ , how fun it’d be.

The feeling of a sharp knife piercing flesh is just _insurmountable_.

And, _oh_ , have you ever felt fresh blood coating your hands?

The way it drips down your arms and fingertips like water, the beautiful shade of crimson coating your lovely skin and creating a masterpiece.

But do you know what the best part is?

 _It’s watching them die_.

To see the life drain from their eyes, to gaze into their fear as they realize this is their end, to watch as their damned souls leave their body, their sins wrapping around them as chains and dragging them to the depths of my kingdom is _pure ecstasy_.

_And boy am I in need of a fix._

My eyes snap open when I sense someone entering the van with me, and only _slightly_ struggle to stop myself from hurling a knife at them. I grin as I see Jeongguk taking a seat across from me, the older wearing a plum colored suit jacket over a black silk button up and matching pants and shoes. His hair is completely pushed back, though several strands fall in front of his face, not catching the memo.

“Are you excited?” He questions.

“Excited? Oh, no no no no _no_ . I am not excited, I am _impatient_. There is a difference, My Yeoubi.”

“Is there now?” I open my mouth to speak, but Jeongguk quickly cuts me off. “Don’t answer that.”

So instead I laugh, partially because of what he said but also because my knife _accidentally_ slipped from my hand and landed in the side of the van next to Jeongguk’s head.

“Oh dear, my hand slipped, my bad.” I say innocently, though it contrasts the barely recognizable mischief in my eyes.

But Jeongguk, who almost as much as I do, merely frowns and grabs my knife before handing it back to me.

“You’ve been a pain in my ass lately with those knives.” He tells me, causing me to laugh yet again.

“Oh I’d _love_ to be a pain in your ass. Want to know why?”

“You’ll tell me either way, so why ask?”

I completely disregard his question. “Because you, My Yeoubi, have a nice ass.”

I burst out in laughter at the deadpan face he gives me, tears collecting in my eyes and stomach aching from how hard I laugh.

“That was _funny_.” I chuckle out as I regain my composure.

And then that’s when a wave of boredom hits me.

“Oh, Yeoubi, I’m so bored. Won’t you play a game with me? I promise it will be fun.” I say ardently.

Jeongguk gives me a dubious look, eyebrow raised.

“What kind of fun? Because your idea of fun can either be playing with dogs at a dog park or jumping out of a window.” He responds.

“Good fun, very fun. You’ll see, you’ll see, but you need a knife.” I hand him one of my knives, still holding onto my knife from earlier. “Now watch.”

I place one hand on the seat beside me, turning my body so that I face the seat. Making sure my fingers are evenly spaced, I take my knife and rapidly stab it into the spaces between my fingers.

“I have all my fingers, the knife goes chop chop chop. If I miss the spaces in between my fingers will come off. And if I hit my fingers, the blood will soon come out. But all the same I play this game cause that’s what it’s all about. Oh, chop chop chop chop chop chop, I’m picking up the speed, and if I miss my fingers my hand will begin to bleed.” I sing, gradually speeding up as the song progresses.

“Isn’t this game- how do I put this? Taehyung you _like_ pain, but the objective of this game is to _not_ hurt yourself, so how is this _fun_?” Jeongguk questions.

“Well, you’re a sadist, so do you really care? And besides, it’s fun either way, whether or not I get hurt. I know I would never _accidentally_ stab myself, but I might do it purposely which is why it’s fun. Who knows what I might do? The possibilities are endless, My Yeoubi.”

“And that’s the best part, isn’t it?”

A wide smile stretches across my face. “Now you are getting it.”

A small grin plays on the other’s lips as he shakes his head, slowly twirling my knife in his hand.

“So, will you play?” I ask, and the other shakes his head once more.

“I’ll watch.”

I pout slightly, finding playing with myself to be quite boring. Yet I still play the knife game, though with a pout the entire time. As the time passes, everyone else begins to join us, all of them dressed in casual - yet mobile - clothes. I quite begrudgingly stopped my game once the van started up, and once Jeongguk handed me my other knife I put both into their respective sheathes. I boredly swing my feet as we drive humming a random tune to myself as everyone else goes over the plan and their specific, individual jobs. My job is the easiest:

Kill everyone.

I already have everything perfectly planned out and all of the resources necessary. Everyone else will be doing their own jobs while I take care of the members, which means I get almost complete privacy too. When we nearly arrive, Jimin passes out masks to everyone. Each is different yet similar to at least one other person in the group. Namjoon and Jin both wear venetian masks; Namjoon’s all black with silver designs, and Jin’s all white with gold designs. Jimin, Yoongi, and Hoseok all have Japanese fox masks, however only Yoongi’s covers his face. Yoongi’s mask is black with red tassels dangling from one ear, Hoseok’s is white and red with bells attached to an ear, and Jimin’s is white and pink.

My mask, which covers the top half of my face, is white and black with a diamond pattern, and over the right eye is a red heart with gold, spiral designs. Jeongguk’s mask has the same pattern as mine, but a different color scheme. Instead of black and white diamonds, his are red and black, and his heart is white with silver spirals. After we all put on our masks, Namjoon hands some of us chokers. These chokers are quite big, and bulky, all of them black. However, the most noticeable thing about them is the lens smack dab in the center of them. Camera lenses.

Excitement surges through my veins as I put the choker on and Namjoon tests all of them out, making sure they work well. When the van finally stops, however, Jeongguk holds me back as the others all leave.

“We’re going to stay back until Namjoon gives us the okay. They’ll prepare everything for us.” He tells me.

“Us?” I ask. Jeongguk is supposed to go with the others as well.

Instead of answering, Jeongguk just winks at me, smirking slightly as he sits back down. I huff to myself, yet sit down nonetheless and tap my foot in irritation.

“I’m bored,” I say, now kicking my feet back and forth.

“Tae, it’s been three minutes.”

“That’s so long~”

Jeongguk chuckles at my struggle. “Just wait a few more minutes.”

I let out another huff and cross my arms across my chest, frowning even deeper this time. Time passes slowly, like watching paint dry, and though it feels as though it’s been hours by the time Namjoon calls for us via earpieces, though it’s probably only been around thirty minutes. I immediately dart out of the back of the van and rush towards the manor. A loud giggle leaves my lips as I throw the front doors open and stride inside.

“Honey, I’m home!” I jokingly exclaim.

The entire first floor, or rather the very large sitting room, is full of all of the members. The high ceiling actually opens up to the second floor, a balcony wrapping around the square-like room on which my team and a few others are located. I momentarily glance at Namjoon, noticing him give me a signal to let me know that the _special_ plan is in motion. You see, the camera chokers we wear aren't to _record_ what we’re doing.

It’s to _livestream it_.

All across Seoul, the extermination will be broadcasted all over the web and news channels for everyone to see. Namjoon probably spent the first minute or so doing the introduction to the stream, letting everyone know who we are and why we’re doing this. Not everyone will be wearing cameras, they’ll be working behind the scene. Brilliant idea, isn’t it? _Jeongguk came up with it._ A gleeful smile stretches across my lips at the sight of everyone nicely rounded up for me, like lambs to the slaughter. But do you want to know what was even better?

_It was turning around and seeing Jeongguk not only holding my mallet, but one of his own._

His is a bit bigger than mine, but perfect for him to handle, and red and black instead of purple and white. My favorite part about it, though, is the name _Yeoubi_ written in red cursive along the handle. Had we not been live right now and in the middle of a mission I would have grown excited over our matching mallets. But since we are, I merely smirk and take my mallet from him.

“Have you ever played wack-a-human before, Yeoubi?” I mischievously question.

“No, but I think I can beat you.”

“Oh ho ho. Do you know? Well then, whoever gets to thirty first _wins_.”

“You’re on, J.”

“On your mark-”

“-get set-”

“-go!”

Without warning, both Jeongguk and I rush the two nearest guys, raising our mallets and swinging them at the back of their heads. They immediately go limp, falling to the ground like ragdolls as their blood coats the ground. A loud, maniacal laugh erupts from my throat, my head thrown back in laughter.

“His soul said _yeet_!” I yell.

The response after we took out the first two was immediate - everyone either tried to get away from us, or attack us.

“Hey batter batter, hey batter batter swing!” I sing as I wack several more people upside the head. “I’ve got to just do my thing.”

I weave my body to the side, evading someone who tries to punch me and swing my mallet against his head. It collides with the side of his head, crashing right onto his temple, and soon his body crumbles and falls. Another person tries to attack me from behind, and I rear my mallet back and thrust it into his stomach. As he doubles over in pain, I jut the mallet up into his chin and in the process push him back up. _Ready, aim, swing!_ I rocket my mallet into his head and down he goes.

_I wonder if we’ll find a prize if we crack their heads open._

_Hmm, let’s find out and see!_

And so _wack, wack, wack, wack_ I go, laughing hysterically along the way because _fucking hell they’re weak_ . They just drop like flies! They don’t even fight! Oh no fun, no fun at all! They’re just about the equivalent of a _punching bag_! If I wanted that I would’ve just gone to the gym at home!

_Now how do we make this fun?_

_Shooting them is too easy._

_Everything we do makes it easy for us. They’re the ones who need to do something to entertain us._

_Hmm, yeah, you’re right you’re right._

_But what should we_ do _?_

_Let’s play another game._

_Which one?_

_A classic_.

I stop my assault, noticing that none of them are fighting us anymore, just trying to get away. _Cowards. I’ll show them what their cowardice earns them._

“Yeoubi! I’m bored with this game!” I shout, turning to pout at Jeongguk.

The older has lost his jacket and rolled up his sleeves, and maybe I gawk a little at how his arms flex as he swings his mallet against a man’s head. He turns to me once I shout, slinging his mallet over his shoulder.

“How many did you get?” He asks.

“Forty-three. You?”

“Damn, forty-two.”

“Aha! I won!” I childishly stick my tongue out at him, gaining me a scoff and a small smile. “Anyways, I’m bored with this game. Let’s play something else.”

“What do you suggest?”

I beam a smile at him. “I’m glad you asked. Hide and seek!”

“Hide and seek? And where will they hide? There’s only a handful of hiding places in here.”

And that’s when it hits him. My smile curls into a smirk, a dark chuckle rising out of me as a look of realization crosses onto his face. I set my mallet down and turn to the rest of the members, a good couple of dozen of them left and cowering in fear of us. _They’re scared of only two people. That’s pathetic. But they’re scared of_ us _._

_As they should be._

I clap my hands together. “Okay little lambs, you have thirty seconds to hide. If we find you, we kill you. If you don’t hide, we’ll kill you. The game will last three minutes. If you make it through the three minutes, you pass. If you decide to keep hiding after that limit, we’ll kill you. So, in simpler words, _hide or die._ ” I slowly yet clearly articulate my words, feeding off of the fear they exhibit.

Out of the corner of my eyes I notice a lot of people moving around on the balcony, though their movements are silent.

“ _Jeongguk, Tae, we’re moving on ahead to the cleansing stage. Hoseok and Yoongi will stay here and keep an eye on things. The live is still going, it’s getting even more attention than we anticipated so make this quick. We need to get out of here as soon as possible._ ” Namjoon tells us through our earpieces.

Both Jeongguk and I send him subtle nods, letting him know we heard him. With that, I see Namjoon, Jin, and Jimin leave as well as a few others.

“Time starts....now!” I say, quickly going back to what I was doing before.

I turn around and close my eyes, counting aloud. There’s a _lot_ of running and scuffling behind me once I start counting, and even the sound of a few doorknobs rattling. _Sorry little lambs~ All the doors are locked._

“28, 29, 30!” I exclaim as I open my eyes and turn around.

I nearly squeal in delight seeing how many people still haven’t hidden. _And the rush of pleasure that racks through my body seeing the fear on their faces is absolute bliss._ Without a moment’s hesitation, I draw my gun and aim it at the first person my eyes lock onto. _Bang._

_Bang bang bang!_

_Bang bang!_

_Bang bang bang bang!_

_Ayo Hitman Bang-_

_No._

If I thought they dropped like flies before, it’s nothing compared to now as all Jeongguk and I have to do is aim and pull a trigger. I mindlessly sing to myself as Jeongguk finishes off the ones not hiding and I go to “find” the ones that are.

“One, two, Joker’s coming for you. Three, four, we already locked the doors. Five, six, grab a crucifix. Seven, eight, you can try to stay up late. Nine, ten, you’ll never sleep again.” I sing.

I pull back the doors to a standing cupboard, grinning devilishly when I see three men standing inside.

“Found you, little lambs.” I growl, raising my gun.

My finger grips the trigger, _so close_ to squeezing when-

“Times up!” Jeongguk informs me.

I whine loudly, yet still release my grip on the trigger, not quite moving my finger off of it.

“You three are lucky. C’mon now, out of the closet.” I snort before mumbling “out of the closet…” to myself.

I walk behind them as they shuffle to the middle of the room with their arms up in surrender, and I keep my gun aimed at the backs of their heads. Jeongguk and I round everyone else up and I do a quick headcount, making sure everyone is there. _Wow, there’s just enough for-_

“Are you killing them execution style?” Jeongguk asks me.

“No, that’s too boring. Bring them with us, so I can have some toys to play with for a bit.” I respond.

Jeongguk nods and quietly talks into his earpiece. Meanwhile I boredly look around the very much trashed room. Bodies cover the vast expanse of the floor, and blood pools _everywhere._ It coats the walls, the furniture, the floor of course, and even my own body. _Red looks so good on me, just saying._ I look down at all of the bodies surrounding me, feeling satisfied at all of them, but also still _bored_. When I notice a limp arm next to my feet, in quite an awkward position, my first instinct is to kick it. So I do. And then I giggle at the strange way it moved. Slightly curious and amused, I kick it again.

And again.

And again.

And then I start to kick the body attached to it, too, laughing at the way it moves and how more blood rushes out from the force of my kicks. I lose myself in my amusement, kicking random parts of the corpse until there’s all but one place I haven’t kicked. _The head_.

_Do it._

_Punt that shit._

_Like a soccer ball._

_Bitch, it’s football._

_Both of you shut up and let him kick the damn thing._

I rear my leg back and, with as much force as I can gather, kick the head right in the middle of the face. I actually laugh loudly as hit flies back, blood spilling from the nose. I can still feel the satisfying crunch of bones breaking beneath my foot and immediately bring my foot back to kick it again. Over and over I kick the head until it’s become a mangled mess. _And then I jump on the corpse like a trampoline_.

“Crunch crunch crunch! Crunch crunch! Crunchity crunch crunch!” I sing loudly as I feel bones break and organs rupture because of my jumping.

When the corpse becomes a disgusting, squishy mess, I move onto the next body. And the next, and the next. I jump from body to body, sometimes stopping to kick around in the blood, getting it all over my clothes and face. Honestly, playing with the corpses was more fun than creating them. But I did have fun using my new mallet. Despite playing around though, I do make sure to keep an ear out for whenever someone calls me through the earpiece or any updates on how things are going. Until then, however, I plan to make the most out of this boring assignment.

_Jump._

_Crunch._

_Splash._

_Jump._

_Crunch crunch._

_Splish splash._

_Jump, jump._

_CRUNCH._

_Splash._

_Jum-_

“J, let’s go!” Jeongguk shouts.

I stop jumping, whipping my head to look at Jeongguk. He stands not too far from me, wearing his jacket again. The remaining mafia members are gone, and only Jeongguk and I remain in the room.

“Coming~” I say, hopping off of the body I was standing on and plodding my way over to Jeongguk so as to slosh the blood around more.

I softly giggle to myself as it splashes around before hopping in front of Jeongguk. I apologize when my hop causes blood to splash all over Jeongguk’s suit and shoes, but the older only shakes his head and ruffles my hair.

“It’s alright. We’re evacuating now, so let’s go.” He tells me.

I nod and grab his hand, swinging our entwined hands between us as we walk (he walks, I skip) back to the van. However, before we get inside, Jeongguk stops me and takes off my mask.

“I’m just going to explain what happened while you were playing while everyone else gets here.” He says as he grabs a handkerchief from his pocket and gently wipes the blood from my face. “Namjoon got a hold of their important documents and shit about us and disposed of them as well as got a list of their business partners whom we’ll either kill or try to work with. Jackson and his group cleared out any stragglers in and around the manor, then worked with the rest of your group to get things for the cleanse ready.” He pauses to take off my choker and drop it on the ground.

“Namjoon stopped the broadcast shortly before I got you, so chances are everyone saw you playing with the bodies, I thought you’d like to know that. Also, the chokers can’t be traced or tracked but we’re still leaving them here.” Jeongguk puts the handkerchief back into his pockets and moves his hands to hold my waist and pull me against him. “Now, since you won wack-a-human, tell me what you want as a prize.”

“Hmm.......can I have whatever I want?” I ask, smirking slightly.

“As long as it’s within reason - yes, you can.”

I hum lightly, putting on a thinking face. As I do so, I let my hands travel up Jeongguk’s stomach and chest, running across his shoulders and neck before reaching his face and taking off his mask, tossing it somewhere behind me. I wrap my arms around his neck and slightly sway us from side to side.

“I want…” I begin quietly, “you to watch a movie with me.”

Jeongguk raises an eyebrow. “Is that it?”

“That’s it. When we get home watch a movie with me.”

Jeongguk grins and pecks my forehead.

“Your wish is my command, bun.”

\---

_**Neo: Update! So I accidentally pasted this chapter twice when I was copying and pasting it from Google Docs and didn't realize. Thank you to those who let me know about it! I'm sorry for the mistake T-T, next time I'll double check to make sure everything is correct. Thank you again for reading! I'll be posting a Christmas special in a few minutes so please look out for that!** _


	29. Underneath the Tree pt I

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas Special! Merry Christmas everyone!

The mansion was silent, sleep plaguing its inhabitants with gentle dreams and warm comfort. There was, perhaps, only one person awake in time to see the sunrise from the snowy balcony. He had been awake for an hour or so, not yet adjusted to the change in time for daylights saving even though it happened weeks ago. He just chanced to look outside on his way to the kitchen and saw that it was snowing, and a warm happiness filled his being. He pulled on his fluffy robe and dashed out onto the balcony, forgetting to close the door and curtain behind him.

He leant against the railing, a soft, serene smile on his face as he watched the snow fall, the vast land in front of him covered in an already thick blanket of pure snow. He watched in awe as the sun slowly began to rise. He was fascinated with the way the skyline was stained a vibrant red and bled into a faded orange. A soft pink slowly blended out of the orange and into a light lilac color before shifting into a bruised purple and a midnight blue. Watching the snow float - not fall or drop but _float_ \- onto the ground with the soft morning light illuminating the flakes brought a sense of tranquility and fulfillment over him. He adored the winter time more than anything, and if he could, he’d stand there on that cold, snowy balcony forever.

A sharp gust of wind blew over his small frame, and his body shivered on instinct. He slightly huddles into himself to conserve warmth, but other than that he makes no effort to warm himself up. He stays lost in his mind, enchanted by the ethereal view in front of him. Behind him the black curtains fly upwards like shadows, the cold wind carrying them into the air. The cold air infiltrates the bedroom, slowly waking up the male still asleep in bed. The dark blankets rest lowly on his hips, and his bare, tattooed back erupts in small goosebumps from the icy breeze. He lets out a soft sigh, coming to the realization that he’s now awake and won’t be falling back to sleep any time soon.

He blindly reaches out to his side, searching for the little kitten that’s usually curled against his side when he wakes up. However, when he doesn’t feel the bundle of warmth he opens his eyes, slightly wincing at the bright light. A soft frown adorns his lips when he doesn’t find the green eyed kitten, and he sits up in bed, ruffling his hair and quietly yawning before looking around. Immediately he catches sight of the open balcony door, the winter breeze parting the curtains for him so he can see. Immediately his frown turns into a fond smile once he sees the small, blonde haired boy leaning against the railing.

Flakes of snow build up atop of his head from standing still in the cold for so long, which the tattooed male silently laughs at. A red, faux fur robe with white trims wraps around his slender body, and only a pair of fluffy white thigh high stockings protects his legs and feet from the cold. Still smiling, the inked male gets out of bed, stretching his stiff limbs before ruffling his messy, black hair. He grabs his own black robe, loosely tying it around his waist as he heads onto the balcony, hissing to himself as his bare feet touch the frigid ground.

He walks up behind the oblivious blonde haired boy, wrapping his arms around the smaller’s waist and resting his chin on his shoulder, pressing his body flush against the other’s. The younger changed his body wash and lotion for the new season, and the ink haired male couldn’t get enough of his new scent. He smelt like peppermint and vanilla and with the strong scent of pine from the nearby forest, the black haired male thought he smelt like heaven.

“Good morning, Ggukie.” The blonde boy says softly, resting his hands on top of the other’s arms.

“Good morning, sweetheart.” Jeongguk responds, nuzzling his nose into the crook of the smaller’s neck. “Why are you up so early?”

“To watch the snow. Isn’t it so pretty?”

Jeongguk hums lightly, pressing a soft kiss to the blonde’s skin before looking up at him.

“You’re more beautiful, though. My beautiful Taehyung.” Jeongguk says, brushing his nose against Taehyung’s cheek.

Taehyung lets out a little giggle, and Jeongguk swears it’s the prettiest sound he’s ever heard. A bright blush graces Taehyung’s cute bread cheeks, making Jeongguk slightly fawn over his cuteness, and he turns to smile at the black haired male.

“You’re cheesy.” He states.

Jeongguk mirrors his smile. “You love cheesy.”

Taehyung only laughs, leaning forwards to kiss Jeongguk’s cheek before turning back to the view in front of him.

“Look at how soft and perfect the snow looks. We should make snow angels.” He says.

“Oh yeah? I don’t know.”

“Please, Ggukie? It’ll be so much fun! There’s so much snow to play with!”

“Yeah, there is. But I’ve already got my own snow angel right here, and he’s much warmer than the snow.”

Taehyung’s face turns a bright red, and the boy whines loudly, causing Jeongguk to laugh. Taehyung turns around in Jeongguk’s hold, burying his face in the latter’s chest.

“You’re such a sap.” Jeongguk hears Taehyung whine.

“Your sap.” He replies.

Taehyung smiles into Jeongguk’s chest, not so subtly nuzzling closer.

“Yeah, my sap.” He murmurs.

The pair stay cuddled together for a while, only going back in when Jeongguk notices the other shivering terribly from the cold and dragging him back into their room. He runs a warm bath and picks out fluffy clothes for Taehyung to wear once he’s out of his bath. Taehyung watches the older move about the room with a fond smile on his lips, completely wrapped up in blankets with only his head peeking out (Jeongguk would be damned if he let him get sick). He giggles once Jeongguk lifts his burrito form, repeatedly pecking the small boy’s face as he carries him to the bathroom and effectively making Taehyung laugh more. Taehyung immediately melts in the water, sinking down in the hot water with a soft, contented sigh.

Jeongguk changes into warmer clothes while Taehyung bathes, having taken a shower last night before bed himself. He pulls on a simple black sweater and matching jeans, not leaving out his silver lock choker, the cool metal creating a warm feeling in his chest once he puts it on. Not too long afterwards, Taehyung comes out of the bathroom wrapped in a fluffy towel. He waddles over to the bed where his clothes lay and quickly gets dressed. The olive green sweater dress he pulls on has cute, tan colored reindeer and trees and snow, and his striped thigh high stockings match it. He puts on a thick, cream colored sweater jacket for extra warmth, finishing off the look with his lock choker.

“Ggu, ‘m ready.” He says before plopping himself onto the older’s lap.

Immediately Jeongguk wraps his arms around Taehyung’s waist and holds onto him tightly as he stands up, lifting the blonde with him. Taehyung laughs softly as he’s raised, wrapping his legs around Jeongguk and clutching onto his shoulders. The pair make their way down to the kitchen, smiling lightly as they hear everyone laughing and joking inside.

“Good morning!” Jimin is the first one to notice Taehyung and Jeongguk, his smile so wide his eyes close.

“Good morning, Chimmy!” Taehyung holds out an arm to the silver haired male, silently asking for a hug which he quickly receives.

“Diff -ou gufs fee aw o’ fe thnow? ‘Ere’s ‘o ‘uch!” Bambam shouts with a muffin in his mouth.

“Someone translate, please. We can’t understand muffin.” Jeongguk says, meanwhile Taehyung giggles as Bambam shoves another chocolate chip muffin in his mouth.

“No idea.” Jackson chimes in.

“You heathen, stop talking with your mouth full!” Mark shouts, whacking Bambam on the back of his head.

Bambam starts choking, pieces of muffin flying from his lips as he violently coughs. Taehyung erupts into a fit of laughter and so do several others, meanwhile Yugyeom hands the poor boy a cup of water to drink. Bambam quickly drinks it, but drinks it too fast and ends up choking even more. Taehyung gasps loudly, tears collecting in his eyes as he continues laughing, unaware of the loving gaze pointed at him. Jeongguk isn’t quite sure what’s happening anymore, he just knows that Taehyung looks absolutely heavenly when he’s happy like this and his laughter is the loveliest sound he’s ever heard.

“Shit, I almost died. But anyways- I was asking if you guys saw the snow outside? There’s so much of it!” Bambam finally says.

“See it? This one right here had a whole pile of it building up on his head from watching it for who knows how long. I wouldn’t be surprised if he ends up sick soon.” Jeongguk chuckles, ruffling Taehyung’s hair before kissing his little pout away.

“Everyone hurry up and eat so we can decorate this place!” Jin yells, setting a large stack of blueberry waffles on the table.

There were no disagreements, and soon enough Taehyung and Jeongguk joined everyone at the table - merrily eating the assortment of foods placed before them. It was an unusual sight, if an outsider were to see it. The nation’s most brutal and terrifying mafia members sitting around a table, wearing christmas clothes, laughing sweetly and joking as they eat pancakes and waffles and fruits and juice. Even the ever stoic Yoongi, who had barely cracked a smile since he joined, had the biggest gummy smile on his face. Taehyung was ecstatic, shoveling food into his mouth as quick as he could. More than once Jeongguk had to tell the boy to slow down before he choked like Bambam did, and for a while he would before his excitement would take over once more.

He simply loved the winter time.

He loved the snow, he loved the colors, he loved bundling up in pretty, warm clothes. He loved the scents, he loved the holiday festivities, he loved roasting marshmallows on the fire with his family. And now his family is over twice as large as it used to be, and Taehyung couldn’t be happier. Jeongguk, meanwhile, loved seeing Taehyung so happy, but if the boy kept eating as fast as he was he was sure he wouldn’t make it to see Christmas. So it was to both of their delights when Taehyung, as usual, finished eating first, and all but dragged everyone else out of their seats even though they were still eating.

And maybe he giggled seeing Bambam stuff another muffin in his mouth before rushing after them.

“Decorating time! Decorating time!” Taehyung exclaims, jumping up and down as he looks at the boxes upon boxes of Christmas decorations.

“When did we even get all of these decorations? When did we even _decorate_?” Jinyoung questions, picking up a bundle of garland.

“Jimin and I bought them a few weeks ago when we saw you had nothing. What the actual hell guys? How did you _not_ have any Christmas decorations?” Jin complains before helping Taehyung stand back up.

The small boy had been busy away grabbing silver tinsel when he managed to trip over his own feet, confused as to what happened and looking up at everyone with big, puppy eyes. Jeongguk immediately went to pick the boy up, heart clenching at the cute sight of his angel, but Jin beat him to it, having been standing right next to him.

“Well, we didn’t really _really_ celebrate Christmas.” JB states.

Six boys freeze in their steps. Slowly, a soft _thud_ can be heard as the tinsel Taehyung was holding falls to the ground. The blonde boy turns around, lips set in a deep pout and shining eyes wide with both shock and sadness.

“You don’t celebrate Christmas?” He asks in a soft, almost hurt, voice.

_It was at this moment they knew....they fucked up._

“Um......no?” Mark answers, already preparing himself for the backlash.

“That’s it!” Taehyung shouts, a now determined look on his face. “We’re gonna make this the best Christmas ever to make up for all of the Christmas’ you didn’t celebrate! Yoongi hyung! You get the playlist going! Hobi hyung and Jimin hyung, you two get the trees up! Jin hyung start the cookies! And Namjoon hyung I’m trusting you to get the lights up, please don’t break anything or yourself! The rest of you- follow me!”

And just like that they all got to work, following the youngest’s orders down to the T. Slowly, but surely, the entire mansion was completely covered in decorations. Well, except for the cellar, of course, but we won’t talk about that. Garland covered railings and tinsel lined the window sills. Red bows were pinned onto the walls and bells hung from string lining the upper perimeter of the rooms. Wreaths were placed above fireplaces and on doors and stockings hung above the fireplace as well, each person’s name hand stitched onto them by Taehyung himself.

The mansion even _smelt_ like Christmas!

It smelt like cherries and chestnuts. There was vanilla and peppermint; gingerbread and cinnamon. Hot chocolate and roasting marshmallows! There were too many scents going on at once that one could barely identify one from the other. And don’t even ask about the outside of the house. The other members of the mafia were more than shocked and confused to see _Christmas_ lights being put up, but they all like the way the mansion looked lit up with the bright lights that Namjoon controlled with a little remote.

There were _dozens_ of trees in and out of the house - each neatly yet beautifully decorated. Yet none of them compared to the great pine tree sitting in the living room, the star on top only a hair away from touching the ceiling. It was white and gold themed, and Jeongguk couldn’t even begin to describe how elegant it looked. It was long into the night by the time everyone had finished, and only Taehyung was still energetic as he ate dinner. Even Hoseok, the brightest and most lively of them all, was eating his food with his eyes half closed.

They were all more than happy to finally head off to their rooms for the night, their bodies aching from all the work. Taehyung laid snuggled in one of Jeongguk’s hoodies, waiting for the older male to get out of the shower. He was busy playing with the drawstrings of the hoodie, thinking about what to get everyone for Christmas when he felt a sudden weight on his body, inhibiting him from breathing. Jeongguk lays completely on top of Taehyung, holding onto him like a giant teddy bear. His slightly damp hair tickled Taehyung’s jaw, and he couldn’t stop himself from wriggling his arm free to play with the dark locks.

“What are you thinking about, darling?” Jeongguk gently asks, face buried in the crook of Taehyung’s neck.

Taehyung felt shivers going down his back from the sensation of Jeongguk’s voice against his skin, and he subconsciously smiled.

“I’m thinking about what to get everyone for Christmas. ‘M so excited.” He replies.

“Me too, sweetheart.” He pauses. “Is there anything special you want for Christmas?”

“Yeah, you.”

“Me?”

Taehyung softly giggles. “Mmm. I don’t need anything special, just you. You’re all I need underneath the tree.”


	30. 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I promise.

_ Jeongguk _

The silvery glow of the moonlight crawls into the room like cobwebs, dotting parts of the room as if they were strobe lights. It’s with the small amount of moonlight that I’m able to make out Taehyung’s features, the smaller laying next to me on his stomach, head facing me as he quietly sleeps. He fell asleep in my arms as we watched our movie, another Disney film, his body completely numb to the outside world - unaware of its happenings. I brought him upstairs as soon as I noticed him asleep and laid him in bed, the both of us already in pajamas.

Now I lay on my side as I face him, head propped up on one hand and the other gently tracing the curve of his spine; from his neck down his back and up again. Even in his sleep, Taehyung quietly purrs in content at the sensation, back softly arching into my hand before dropping back onto the bed. A warm filling builds up throughout my chest, invading my bloodstreams and pumping throughout my body. It’s a comforting feeling that makes my body tingle and, without my noticing or meaning to, smile just a bit.  _ This cute ass boy is making me feel things and I don’t know how to feel about it. _ I let my fingers tangle into his soft hair, twirling the locks around my fingers before gently smoothing them back down.

Taehyung’s head slowly nuzzles into my hand, a soft sigh escaping his lips. I smile a bit, lowering myself completely onto the bed and wrapping my arm around the other’s dainty waist. As I begin to close my eyes, I notice Taehyung’s nose scrunch up, his eyebrows furrowing together, and his lips turn down into a frown. Small grunts sound from the back of his throat as his face continues to show signs of discomfort and, I think, fear.  _ Is he having another nightmare? _ He continues like this for a bit before I start to wake him up, my hand resting on his shoulder just as his eyes snap open and he bolts upright, breathing heavily.

“Tae? What’s wrong, bun? Did you have a- what are you looking for?” I question as I also sit up.

Tae whips his head around in every direction, as if he’s trying to find something. His breathing is deep and heavy as he looks around in the shadows before turning back to me.

“Tae, wha-” I begin.

He cups my face in his hands, bringing my face level to his. I can’t see his face clearly, his features hidden in the dark, but I can feel the worry radiating off of him in waves.

“Bun...?” I trail off, feeling him caress my face, fingers tracing over the parts of my face and trailing down to my neck.

I stay still, partially out of confusion and also partly figuring that this is something he needs. His gentle hands, like fire against my skin, wander around my chest and stomach before snaking around to my back. I feel his hands delve over the dips and curves of my back before going down each of my arms. He lastly carefully pats down my legs before letting out a deep sigh, completely  _ dropping _ back onto the bed.

“Tae? Taehyung? Are you okay?” I ask, going to bend over to check on him when he once again shoots upright.

His arms wrap around my shoulders, face buried deeply into the crook of my neck. My own arms wrap around his waist, though I’m still confused as to what’s happening.

“You’re okay,” I hear him say, relief flooding his voice.

“Of course I am. Why wouldn’t I be?” I question, nuzzling my face into his hair.

Yet, instead of answering, he shakes his head.

“No reason, I’m here to make sure of that. I just had a bad dream, is all.” He tells me.

I softly rub his back, hoping to soothe him some.

“Was it one of  _ those _ nightmares or...-”

“No, it was just about something silly.”

“If it were silly you wouldn’t have given me a full body pat down.”

He chuckles at that, and my own lips curl up into a smile at the sound.

“Jeongguk, you know you can talk to me, right?” The younger asks randomly.

“What?” I reply out of confusion.

“I said you can talk to me. About anything; whether it be something trivial or important. I know I can be really ditsy at times and I’m not the most serious most of the time, aha, but I know how to act in certain situations. I can be serious and I can give pretty good advice, at least Jackson and Mina say I do, but I don’t really think they were telling the truth. Jackson is a pretty silly guy himself and I’m pretty sure Mina thinks of me as her younger brother. Or, well, another younger brother. Soobin is her brother. But what I mean to say is that if there’s ever anything on your mind or something bothering you, you can talk to me.

“I am your assistant, but I’m also your friend. I’m here to carry some of your burden and be someone you can confide in. No matter what. Even if it’s something completely stupid and random I’m-”

“Tae, as much as I very much appreciate this, I’m so confused. What are you talking about? Where did this come from? Are you alright?”

He sighs softly, holding onto me just a little bit tighter.

“I’m okay. Just know that you can talk to me, okay?” He repeats.

Still slightly confused, I tell him “okay” and softly kiss the top of his head.

“And another thing,” Tae says as we lay down.

“Yes?”

“Promise me something. It’s kind of stupid but......promise me.”

“What is it?”

“Promise you’ll never leave my side. No matter what.”

Without hesitation, I hold my pinkie up. “I promise.”

He removes his head from my neck and I feel his pinkie wrap around my own.

“And I promise to do the same,” He tells me. “I’ll be here until the day I die.”

“That’s a big promise, Tae.”

He shrugs. “I haven’t anywhere else to go. I follow where the people I care about go, and since everyone is here, so am I.”

I smile, chuckling a bit. “You’re cute.”

He whines and shoves his head back into my neck, making me laugh again.

“Go to sleep, you big oaf.” His muffled voice sounds.

“You’re calling  _ me _ the oaf, you clumsy little puppy?”

“Well, I’m not all big and awkward like you.”

I can’t help but snort, stifling a laugh as I flip us over. I hover over the younger, a confused noise leaving his lips before turning into a shriek as I tickle him.

“ _ Awkward _ ? I’m  _ awkward _ , huh?” I question.

I only get squeals of laughter in reply.

“W-wait! G-Gguk- G-Ggukie stop it! Ahhh! S-stop it!”

“Take it back, brat.”

“N-n-no! Y-you’re a m-meanie!”

“Says the person who called  _ me _ an  _ oaf _ .”

“I-if you d-don’t s-stop ri-ight now I-I’m leaving!”

“No.” I stop tickling him, but drop my entire body on top of him.

“G-get off of me!”

“No.”

“What do you mean no? I can’t breathe!”

“No, you’re mine.”

And then he laughs, chest shaking with the force of his laughter. He wraps his arms and legs around me like a little koala.

“My possessive Yeoubi, I already told you I won’t leave you. Now stop being a meanie and let me cuddle you to sleep.” He tells me.

I peck his cheek and roll us onto our sides. “As you wish, bun.”

When I wake up the next morning, it’s because I feel as though I’m being suffocated. However, when I open my eyes, I see it’s only Taehyung sleeping on my chest, and suddenly I don’t mind being suffocated.  _ As long as he’s happy, so am I. _ The younger is slow to wake up, as always, but I don't mind that either. He reminds me of a little kitten, nuzzling his head into my chest and curling into a ball as he purrs.

“C’mon, bun, let’s go get some breakfast, yeah?” I say softly, carefully picking up the younger.

Taehyung only huffs in response, burrowing his head into the crook of my neck as he attempts to go back to sleep. However, his attempts are ruined as soon as we enter the ever lively kitchen. When I go to set him on a seat so I can grab us breakfast, he whines and tiredly mumbles out “Hobi hyung”. So I give him to his hyung and leave them to get Tae and I something to eat. In only a few short moments I hear Tae squealing in amusement and talking animatedly with several people. I don’t fight off my grin as I hear him talking, glancing at him from time to time.

“Things have changed a lot with them around, hasn’t it?” Jackson asks as he walks over to me, grinning as well.

“It has. I can’t remember the last time everyone has been this excited for  _ breakfast _ .” I reply as I pour a cup of coffee.

“We didn’t even eat breakfast together. Now we’re in need of a new table to fit everyone and someone to fix all of the holes in the walls.”

I chuckle and turn to lean against the counter while still easily seeing Taehyung.

“No point in that, Tae will probably just add more the next day.” I say as I sip my coffee.

“That’s why our old house had so many holes.” Yoongi comments from nowhere, though I don’t even bother wondering where he came from this time. “We used to give him Blow Pops when a knife landed in a premade hole.”

“Blow Pops?” I question.

Yoongi nods and pours himself his own cup of coffee.

“Kid has an obsession with them. It’s not as bad as it used to be, but still; he loves them.” He explains.

I nod, mentally noting the fact as we watch the new debate that ensues among the others. The topic is a bit questionable, but entertaining to watch nonetheless.

“Twilight was the worst fucking series  _ ever _ ! Bella was a stone faced  _ whore _ who had another man kiss her while she was  _ engaged _ to someone else! Edward fucking  _ sparkled _ in the sun and literally left Bella for over a year and put the dumb bitch into a depressive state which- bitch the fuck?! Why are you so upset over the man who left you?! And then Jacob is literally about to  _ make babies with their daughter _ which is a whole new rant I can go on about!” Taehyung shouts.

“Oh like Harry Potter is any better!” Mark yells back.

“It is!” Several people holler.

“How the hell can he argue about so much? First it was chicken nugget sauce and now which series is better?” I ask aloud.

I wasn’t anticipating Taehyung to hear me, but (to my dismay) he did.

“ _ That _ wasn’t an argument because honey mustard is clearly superior just like Harry Potter is better than that shitty romance! And I swear to Hell itself, Jeon, if you try to tell me barbecue is better I am  _ yoinking _ your kneecaps!” He cutely growls.

I raise an eyebrow, smirking to myself as I set my coffee down. I hold my hands out and give Taehyung a challenging look.

“Come then, darling. Try me if you want to.” I say.

Taehyung needed no further provocation as he hops out of Hoseok’s arms and darts towards me. I grin devilishly as I pick him up and throw him over my shoulder, gaining a shocked and confused squeak from the smaller.

“Now, what does this bad kitty deserve as a punishment?” I rhetorically ask.

“Put me down, you barbari-  _ ouch _ !” He yelps as I smack his butt.

“I don’t appreciate the name calling very m-” I pause when I feel him hitting my back.

“I said down, boy, down!”

And perhaps my face twitched a bit with annoyance. I hold him securely on my shoulder with one arm and bring the other up to first smack Taehyung on the butt again, and then up to his side.

“Wait- wait- Gguk- no- not again- wait- sto- ahhhhhhh!” He erupts into laughter as I tickle him.

I hear even more laughter from the others as they watch Taehyung helplessly struggle against me, screaming with laughter.

“Concede and I’ll let you go.” I say over the laughing.

“Never!” Taehyung shouts back.

“Never? Even when I do......this?”

I let Taehyung slip a bit down, his face now at my lower back, and turn from side to side. Taehyung squeals as he spins around plus me tickling him. I hear Hoseok and Jin laughing especially hard at the scene and can’t help but smile myself.

“Will you concede now?” I ask, gaining a sharp “no” from Taehyung.

So I hop, making Taehyung squeak again.

“Wait- no- stop it!” He yells.

“Concede, Taehyung.” I tell him.

“No! Jinnie ain’t raise no bitch!”

“That’s my Tae! Show him who’s boss!” Jin shouts.

“Don’t cheer for him, he tried to take my knees!” I holler.

“You said barbecue was better than honey mustard! You deserved it!” Jimin retorts.

“But my  _ knees _ !”

“Fuck ya chicken strips!” Tae screams.

“What the fuck.” I hear Jackson say.

“Where did chicken strips come from?” Mark asks.

His question goes unanswered as Tae swiftly sits up, making everyone - including me - pause in shock. The shock is short lived, however, as Taehyung maneuvers his way around and wraps both legs around my neck. He spins around to my back, grabbing onto the arm I was using to hold him. He quickly moves his leg to encase my arm into his lock as well before leaning backwards, causing us both to land on the floor. I let out a grunt as we crash down, but Tae doesn’t make a single noise.

“Yo  _ knees _ are  _ mine _ to  _ yoink _ .” Is the first thing he says.

“ _ What _ is your obsession with my knees, you little gremlin?!” I counter.

“ _ You _ have an obsession with my thighs!”

“Okay, but you have nice thighs, Tae. It’s hard  _ not _ to be obsessed with them.” Jimin interjects.

“ _ Hey _ !”

“Okay, you obnoxious ass socks, shut the fuck up and eat. I spent two hours making breakfast and if every last crumb isn’t eaten by the time we’re all done I am  _ inverting your rib cages _ .” Jin threatens.

You could never see anyone move as fast as Taehyung and Yoongi did, both traveling at the speed of light to sit at the table. I chuckle at Taehyung’s actions and get up, rolling my shoulder slightly as I grab our breakfasts and head to the table.

“I’m going to have to start wearing knee guards around you.” I joke while I slide Tae his food.

“I’ll just yoink ‘em while you sleep.”

“Tae.......leave my knees alone.”

“Leave my thighs alone, then.”

“What.”

“You heard me. If you want me to leave your knees alone, then you have to leave my thighs alone.”

“That is not a fair compromise.”

“Life isn’t a fair compromise. So- are you willing to lose the safety of your knees for the comfort of my thighs or not?”

“But  _ why _ my knees?”

“ _ Why _ not?”

“They’re my  _ knees _ .”

“And it’s my  _ thighs _ you’re gambling here. Do you care more for  _ your knees _ or  _ my thighs _ ?”

I don’t answer, just quietly eat my breakfast and pretend not to notice the shit eating grin on Taehyung’s face. After breakfast, Tae tells me he’s got something to do and kisses my cheek before skipping away. Meanwhile, I head to my office to do more paperwork. There isn’t much to do, Taehyung makes sure to give me the papers in a steady flow. I finish sometime around two, maybe three, and stand up to stretch a bit. Picking up my phone to call Tae whom I haven’t seen since breakfast, I mindlessly head over to a nearby window. My finger stops above Tae’s name as I look out the window, and soon I turn my phone off and put it into my pocket.

I turn away from the window and leave the room, heading to the group gathered in a circle in the backyard and the familiar bob of blonde hair in the middle.


	31. 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Off with his head!

_ Taehyung _

“Now, I know you’re all wondering about why I’ve brought you here. The answer is simple, but first; let me bring something to your attention.” I begin, looking at the group around me.

I managed to get all of Got7 (with the exception of Yugyeom, who politely declined when Bambam asked him if he wanted to join us), Yoonie hyung, Jiminie hyung, Hobi hyung, Mina noona, and Bogummie hyung to join me on my expedition. We all stand in the backyard of the mansion, the others surrounding me as I stand on a big box like a platform. I’ve been doing my best to keep a serious face on, but truth be told I’m hella excited.  _ Oh I wish we could’ve broadcasted  _ this _ last night. _

“Throughout the ages there has always been a divide between sinners and saints. Saints who were said to be blessed by the heavens and loved by God, and sinners who wrote their names in Satan’s black book with their own blood and in return wear his mark on their chests. Throughout the years it has always been the saints punishing sinners for their  _ evil _ deeds, and like humans, punishments have evolved throughout time. From hanging to a life sentence sentence in prison, the different ways to torture a person is insurmountable.” I continue.

“Tae, what the fuck?” Jimin asks.

“I’m leaving.” Youngjae says.

“Holdup, holdup. Let him finish first.” Jinyoung replies, grabbing the back of Youngjae’s shirt and pulling him back into the circle.

“Now, of all these different torture and killing methods - which is one of the most famous? When you hear execution, what is the first thing that comes to mind? I’ll give you a hint; think of the Queen of Hearts.” I say.

“I got it! Beheading!” Jackson shouts.

“Bingo!”

“Hell yeah!”

“Wait a minute, won’t we need a guillotine?” Mark questions.

I smirk. “I’m standing on it.”

“Where the hell did you get a guillotine from?” Bogum asks.

“I have connections. But! That’s not the point. We aren’t just going to be randomly selecting people to behead. Instead we will be playing a game. Well, two of us will be. But after the first game we can all take turns!”

“I swear, Taehyung, if it includes jumping out of windows-” Jimin begins.

“Chim Chim it was only on the second floor! And you didn’t even get a bruise! You landed on me!”

“It would’ve been the other way around if I didn’t flip us last minute!”

“I didn’t even get badly hurt!”

“Yeah, because you bounce! You’re like a rubber ball!”

“You’re just too soft!”

“Thank you! I lotion every night!”

“I didn’t need to kn- I already know that!”

“What are you arguing about this time?” My head perks up at the sound of the new voice and I turn to face the approaching male.

“Ggukie!” I exclaim, hopping off of the box and into the older’s arms.

He chuckles a bit as he catches me, holding me on his side so he can see just what we’re doing.

“Ggukie, tell Chim Chim that he’s being overdramatic.” I tell Jeongguk with a pout.

“Jeongguk, tell Taehyung that jumping out of a window is not fun!” Jimin retorts.

“I mean…” Yoongi interject. “Speak for yourself.”

“ _ What _ ? When did you jump out of a window?”

“We used to do it a lot back in the day.” I answer for him. “We jumped out of windows, off of buildings, there was a time we jumped off a bridge, too, and landed on a train.  _ That _ was fun.”

“Those were the kill or be killed days.” Yoongi adds.

“Okay, grandpa’s, what are you all doing?” Jeongguk changes the topic.

“Oh! I’m glad you asked! We’re building a guillotine!”

“Where the fuck did you get a guillotine from?”

“My connections have connections, Yeoubi.”

“Fair enough.”

“And we’re also going to play a game!”

“What game?”

“A classic!”

“That didn’t answer my question. What’s the name of the game?”

“Hehe, ‘name of the game’. It’s chess, hehe!”

“You can play?”

“Joonie taught me. It’s been a while since I played though. Now moving on! Let’s build this guillotine! I will read the instructions while you all build!”

There’s a mix of excited shouts and disapprovement, most of the latter because I’m making them do the work which just makes me giggle.

“Okay, my little gremlin, where do you want to sit?” Jeongguk asks as BamBam opens the box, several others holding the box up.

“Umm, let’s go right there.” I answer, pointing at a nearby spot on the grass.

Jeongguk walks us over and sits down, moving me so that I sit between his legs with my back to his chest. His arms wrap firmly around my waist, chin resting a top my head as my own hands lay over his.

“So, how are we doing this chess thing?” He questions as we watch the others taking everything out of the box.

“Well, we still have some left over spray paint, so I figured we’d make a life sized layout of a chess board on the grass, and then we can make paper tags and tape them on the fronts and backs of the people-”

“People?”

“Yeoubi~ Don’t interrupt me~ And yes, people. This will be a game of human chess, and whenever a ‘piece’ is taken out, they will be beheaded.”

“Mmm, sounds good. I’m supposing more prisoners will be brought out after every round?”

“Mhm. And we can also do some rounds with just us, no beheading, of course. I think it’d be fun, too.”

“Tae, here’s the manual!” Hobi shouts, jogging over to hand me the pamphlet.

“Ah, thank you hyungie.” I respond.

He jogs back over to the others and I go through the instruction manual, Jeongguk reading it as well. I give out directions to the others, giggling when they get something mixed up before correcting them. Jeongguk quickly loses interest in the construction part of everything, and spends his time caressing my tummy under my shirt, playing with my hair, and placing random kisses on my shoulder and neck.  _ He really is a sap, but I love it. _ Sometimes he’d stop moving completely, face buried in the crook of my neck, and only the tingly feeling of his breath on my skin to let me know he’s still alive.

I think he momentarily fell asleep in those moments because as soon as someone made a loud noise or shouted he’d slowly begin to move again until things were calm. Some hours later, including several breaks and bouts of pure stupidity and chaos, the guillotine was complete. I let out an excited squeal as the last few screws are put in and hop up to my feet, dragging Jeongguk with me.

“Oh my gosh, look at it! It’s so cool! Quick! Let’s make the chess board!” I exclaim, jumping up and down in glee.

As soon as a can of paint is put into my hands I get started on making the board, estimating how big everything needs to be rather than using exact measurements. Jimin and JB help me in making the board and labeling it, and once it’s done the prisoners from last night are brought out. They look even more panicked than last night, if possible, and visible exhaustion paints their features. I almost feel bad for them.  _ Almost. _ We have them line up into the beginning spots for the pieces and use spray paint to mark their roles, using black paint for the black pieces and red for the white.

“Yay! Okay, okay we’re ready to go! Who wants to play against me?” I question, looking around for any volunteers.

“I can’t play.” Jimin says.

“I suck at it.” Mark comments.

“Same.” Someone else adds.

“Awe, no one will play with me? Namjoonie’s busy~ I can’t ask him. And Jinnie doesn’t like chess.”

“I’ll play with you.” Jeongguk tells me.

“You will?” I ask with a hopeful look.

“Yeah. I haven’t played it much, though, so it might not be any fun.”

“Nonsense!” I grab the hem of his hoodie and drag him to the white/red side of the board. “Any time spent with you is always fun.”

I don’t miss the small smile he gives me as I dash to the other side of the board.

“Okay! We’re ready! Yeoubi, you’re first!” I shout.

Jeongguk is quiet for a moment, eyes raking over the board and coming up with a plan.

“Pawn six to C5.” He says loudly.

With trembling legs and slow steps, I watch as the small male in that box moves two spaces forward, eyes nervously darting between his members in front of me.

“Pawn five to D6!” I order, grinning widely as I watch the young woman step forward.

The game progresses slowly for a while, until I take out Jeongguk’s knight with my bishop. I let out an excited giggle, dashing to the guillotine as Jackson and Mark drag the struggling man over.

“Oh this is gonna be  _ good _ .” I tell myself with a chuckle.

I watch with excited eyes as the man is forced into the head lock, the top slammed down with a deafening  _ click _ , signifying its lock. I could already hear several people, including the man locked in place, sobbing, and have to keep myself from telling them to shut up.

“Yeoubi, are you watching?” I shout as I grab the rope, momentarily glancing back to look at Jeongguk who nods at me.

I flash him a quick smile before turning back around and loosening the rope around its metal hook. My heart beats faster, hands tightening around the rope as anticipation courses through my body. Like a flash of light, the rope slips from my hands and in return the metal blade  _ drops _ .

_ Thump _ .

And then silence.

The man’s head rolls on the ground, stopping a few feet from the body face up. I can still see the man’s hands twitching around the wood, and his eyes looking around. Blood pours like molasses from the stump, pooling onto the grass in a vibrant, glossy puddle.

“Aha.” The short, breathy chuckle leaves my lips without my realization. “Haha. Hahaha. Heh. Hehehehehe.” The laughter soon begins to tumble out of me, ringing heavily in the air.

My chest heaves with laughter, my legs weakening beneath me as tears collect in my eyes.

“Oh my fuck,  _ this is amazing _ ! Ggukie did you see it?” I exclaim, turning to look at the older.

A shiver runs down my spine when I see his dark gaze already trained onto me, a mischievous look painting his face. My eyes widen in excitement, lips stretching into a big smile as yet another bout of laughter racks through me.

“You’re turn, my Yeoubi.” I say before heading back to my side.

The game continues on, both of us taking the other’s pieces as we try for the main goal: capturing the king. Whenever a ‘piece’ is taken, they’re beheaded. We all take turns on the guillotine, except for a few who said they’d prefer just watching. We leave their heads where they land, but toss the bodies in a pile for disposal later. The game, eventually, ends in a stalemate. Jeongguk was a lot better than we both thought, proving for an interesting game even though no one won. After our game, Yoongi played against Jackson. While they played I had fun randomly kicking heads around. And when I got bored of that, I had someone bring me an axe and started chopping off limbs from the dead bodies.

“Tae.....why are you doing that?” Jeongguk asks as he watches me chop off another leg.

“Well, why not? It’ll make it easier to burn them.”

“Fair enough, but you’re getting so dirty.”

“It’s just blood, it’ll come off. Don’t act like you haven’t been covered in blood.”

“Touche.”

I giggle. “Besides, don’t I look pretty covered in blood.” I do a little twirl in place, giggling to myself.

Jeongguk gives me a fond smile. “You do, my little morning star.”

I blush slightly at the nickname. “Thank you, Yeoubi.”

“Will you tell me what that means now?”

“Nope. I told you I’ll tell you when you need to be told.”

“And when will that be?”

I shrug. “Whenever it is that you need it.”

Jeongguk sighs, but gives me a little smile nonetheless.

“I’m going to head inside now and get cleaned up. If you’re going to play another game of chess make it quick, I want you inside either in thirty minutes or after your game.” He tells me.

“Huh? What? Why?”

“Because, you’re not allowed to be outside after dark on your own. Hoseok and Jimin have already gone back inside and you know Yoongi will be following after them once his game is over, and nobody else can handle you. Plus you start to get unsteady at night. Not to mention, it’s almost dinner time and you probably haven’t eaten lunch, have you? You need to hurry and get cleaned up as well. So, inside after thirty minutes, understood?”

I pout, not wanting to go in but knowing that everything he said is true.

“Fine.” I mumble, kicking at the grass.

Jeongguk comes closer, lifting my face to meet his and pecking my lips.

“Don’t pout, bun. You can still come back to play tomorrow, don’t worry.” He soothes.

“Will you play with me again?”

“If you want me to, then yes.”

“But do  _ you _ want to?”

Instead of answering, he just smiles and pecks my lips again before ruffling my hair.

“Thirty minutes, Tae. I’ll have a bath ready for you when you come back.” He says.

He heads back to the house after that, and once again I pout.  _ Why didn’t he answer me? Does he want to play with me or not? I don’t want to make him do something he doesn’t want to just because I do. _ Filled with frustration and annoyance, I kick a nearby head, watching as it skyrockets across the yard.  _ And then I pause in shock when I see it hurling towards Jeongguk. _ The head hits him right in the middle of his back, the force and weight of it causing him to stumble forward a bit. My hand flies to my mouth, trying to contain my laughter.

I didn’t  _ mean _ for it to hit him, but that doesn’t mean it wasn’t  _ funny _ . And as Jeongguk slowly turns around, a blank look on his face, I end up succumbing to my laughter, bursting into another fit. I double over in amusement, so caught up in the moment that I don’t notice Jeongguk striding back over to me. It isn’t until I feel a slight pain on my back and am forced forward a bit, a sticky and damp feeling spreading across my shirt where I felt the pain that I turn and see Jeongguk behind me, holding someone’s arm.

“Did you just hit me with an arm?” I shout incredulously, gaining quite a bit of attention.

“You kicked a  _ head _ at my  _ back _ .”

I gasp, not even bothering to tell him it was an accident as I pick up a leg and smack him in the side with it. A challenging look crosses Jeongguk’s face.

“You’re on, Kim.” He says, making me smirk.

We go back and forth, wacking each other with limbs. It was all fun and games until I accidentally hit Yoongi while running away from Jeongguk.

“H-Hyung…” I say nervously, slowly backing away from the other as he wipes blood from his face. “I-I didn’t mean t-”

“Run.”

And run I do, dodging as the older throws random body parts at me. Jeongguk just stood and watched, chuckling softly at the scene. Until Yoongi threw an eyeball at him. And then soon enough  _ all of us _ were running about, throwing heads and arms and legs and each other. I was in the middle of playing hot potato with a head with Youngjae, Jinyoung and JB when a wild Jackson and Yoongi hurling arms at us made us scatter. I laugh as I run, a light feeling in my chest as I watch everyone having fun. I let out a small squeak when someone swiftly picks me up while I’m turned away, but immediately relax when they speak in my ear.

“Let’s get going now, yeah?” Jeongguk asks, to which I nod.

We head back to the mansion unbeknownst to the others who are still playing around. I can’t help but quietly laugh as we dash up to the older’s room, leaving a bloodied trail behind us. We head straight for the bathroom and Jeongguk turns the bath on.

“Ggu,” I call out as I take off my shoes.

“Hm?” He doesn’t look back at me as he focuses on setting the water.

“Take a bath with me.”

That causes him to look at me.

“What?”

“Take a bath with me.” I repeat. “We don’t have to take our underwear off, and you’ve already seen me practically naked so- yeah. Take a bath with me.”

Despite still appearing to be off-guard, Jeongguk nods and turns back to the tub. I chuckle a bit and start taking off my clothes, tossing them into the hamper. I sit on the edge of the tub as Jeongguk adds bubbles in, and swing my feet while he undresses. I turn off the water once the tub is full, then patiently wait for Jeongguk. He gets into the water first, and then carefully pulls me in with him. I situate myself on his lap, facing him, and rest my head against the left side of his chest. I close my eyes as I listen to the sound of his heartbeat, humming in delight when I feel him massaging my thighs.

“Sing something for me.” He quietly says after a while.

I don’t even question the request,  _ I’d do anything he asks of me. _

“You know I want you, it’s not a secret I try to hide. I know you want me, so don’t keep saying our hands are tied. You claim it’s not in the cards, and fate is pulling you miles away and out of reach from me. But you’re here in my heart, so who can stop me if I decide that you’re my destiny? What if we rewrite the stars? Say you were meant to be mine. Nothing could keep us apart, you’d be the one I was meant to find. No one can say what we get to be. So why don’t we rewrite the stars? Maybe the world could be ours tonight.” I sing the lyrics quietly, gently, almost as though they’re an unknown promise that only Jeongguk and I share.

After I finish the song, Jeongguk’s lips seek out mine, and I feel my entire body practically meld against his, like two puzzle pieces being joined together. Jeongguk kisses me like I’m the most fragile thing in the world, but also devours me as though he were a starving man and I was a meal placed before him. He takes care of me. He makes me feel bubbly. And when the kiss is over and he carefully bathes me and I him, I’ve made up my mind.

_ Jeongguk is mine. _

_ No one else can have him. _

The days after that move both slowly and quickly, and my relationship with Jeongguk grows stronger and stronger with every passing day. The older quickly became someone I could trust and often confide in. He became my best friend, not family but still very much important to me. I’m glad I met him, and I’m glad we developed the relationship we did. And when his birthday finally arrived, I decided to show him just how happy I am to have him.


	32. 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Happy Birthday to you~

_ Jeongguk _

The morning started off with a jump.

Literally.

I was woken up by Taehyung jumping onto me.

“Ggukie! Wake up, wake up, wake up! It’s morning~ Rise and shine, my Yeoubi! Up, up, up, up!” He exclaims.

My eyes fling open, my mind and reflexes trying to get me to react, though my body, which had previously been in a deep sleep, strongly protests. Black dots immediately cloud my vision and a wave of vertigo hits me as I try to sit up, causing me to groan and close my eyes as I fall back down on the bed. I hear Tae gasp as I fall back down, hands cupping my face.

“Ggu, are you okay? Did you get up too quickly?” He softly asks.

I hum in response, giving back into sleep now that Tae is calm.

“Don’t yell, bun. I thought something bad happened.” I mumble, blindly reaching out to find him.

He softly chuckles, grabbing onto my hands and placing them on his waist while his own rest on my chest.

“‘M sorry, I got excited. What if I wake you up like this, then?” He questions, cupping my face again.

I feel him placing soft, butterfly kisses all over my face, his ever growing smile evident as he kisses the corner of my lips.

“It’s morning now, time to wake up, baby.” He purrs.

I grip his waist tighter, feeling electricity buzz through my body at his words and the sensation of his lips against my skin.

“Say that again.” I demand quietly.

“Hmm? Say what again?”

“Don’t tease, little kitty. Say it again.”

He chuckles lightly before tantalizingly brushing his lips across mine.

“Baby~” He draws out his words, voice going deeper as he does so. “Time to wake up, baby. We have a special day planned.”

I slowly open my eyes again, and instead of being blinded by the sunlight, I’m blinded by my morning star.

“Good morning, angel.” I say, causing the younger to smile.

“Ahhh, does my Yeoubi like to be called baby?”

“He doesn’t mind.”

“Aww, you’re cute.” Before I can protest he plants several kisses on my lips. “Now get up~ We have an important day today.”

“We do? What is it?” I try to remember if we have any important meetings or jobs today, but nothing comes to mind.

Tae lets out an offended gasp as I continue to struggle with remembering what today is.

“Ggu! Are you being serious right now?” He questions.

“Uhm.....yes. I have no idea what today is.” I answer honestly.

“Oh my hell, Gguk, it’s your birthday!”

I blink a few times.

“It is?” I ask.

Instead of verbally answering, he grabs his phone and shows me the date. Sure enough, September first is displayed across the screen.

“Huh.....it really is my birthday.” I state.

“Not your brightest moment, Ggu.”

“Don’t bully me, I just woke up.”

Taehyung only giggles and hops off of the bed.

“I made you breakfast!” He exclaims as he hops to the other side of the room.

“Oh really? Thank you, bubs.”

I start to get out of bed as well, but Taehyung quickly tells me to sit back down. I laugh a bit as I do what he says, propping myself up on pillows. When he turns back around from grabbing whatever he was getting, my eyes widen. In his hands he carries an  _ entire _ breakfast board full of waffles, bacon, sausage links, ham slices, strawberries, green and red grapes, raspberries, blueberries, blackberries, oranges, grapefruit, mini cinnamon buns, boiled eggs, orange marmalade, coffee, and apple juice.

“Tae....I can’t eat all of that.” I say, staring wide eyed at the board.

“But Gguuu~ you haven’t been eating much lately. You only eat when I make you and even then you don’t eat a lot.” He replies with a pout.

I quietly coo at his little pout and pat my lap.

“C’mere bun.” I tell him.

He immediately walks over, setting the board on the side table before crawling onto my lap.

“I’ll start eating more, but I really can’t eat all of that. It’s too much for one person, but it makes me really happy that you took the time to make it for me. Thank you, sweetheart.” I kiss his pout away and softly rub his sides, and in return he gives me a small smile.

“You’re welcome,” He says quietly, toying with his fingers in his lap. “I went a bit overboard with the breakfast board, didn’t I?”

“No, you didn’t. There might be too much for one person, but there’s more than enough for two.”

Taehyung squeals as I flip him around, his back to my chest and settled in between my legs. His little laugh rings in my ears as I grab the breakfast board and settle it on Tae’s lap.

“You think you put enough fruit on, though?” I ask, picking up a green grape and placing it the younger’s mouth as he chuckles.

“Fruit is so yummy! I could eat it  _ all _ day and never get tired of it!”

“Oh yeah? What’s your favorite fruit?”

“Umm, I like watermelon and pineapples a lot. But strawberries and cherries are really yummy. Oh, but what about blackberries and ‘nanas? I like those a lot, too.”

I laugh quietly, pressing a short kiss to the side of his head.

“So I could just get you a random assortment of fruit and you’d be happy huh?” I ask before taking a bite out of the waffle Tae holds to my lips.

“Silly Yeoubi. You don’t have to give me anything to make me happy. Just being with you is enough for me.” He tells me.

Mouth full of waffle, I don’t respond verbally, but instead send the younger into another fit of giggles as I place butterfly kisses on his neck. The rest of the meal passes like something out of a cliche, romantic movie, with Taehyung and I feeding each other between small kisses, and only hushed words and quiet promises spoken between us. After breakfast, Taehyung sends me to take a shower while he changes his shirt, having spilled marmalade on his by accident. Once I’m out, the first thing I see when walking back into the room is Taehyung with his back to me, one of my silk red button ups covering his slender frame.

The fabric is long on him, reaching just slightly above his finger tips, and clings gently to his tiny waist, yet tightens around his hips and bum. It slips every so often from his shoulders, and the sight of the red silk covering his smooth, honey toned skin is sensual enough to make any man or woman go insane. And when he looked over his shoulder, his wide and innocent eyes hidden partially behind his golden locks, he gave me the sweetest and most inviting smile I’ve seen, and his emerald eyes practically begged me to come closer.

He was a forbidden apple in the Garden of Eden, beautiful and tempting and oh so sweet, but an express ticket to eternal damnation. Yet as my hands find perch around his waist, fitting together like a key to a lock, and as his body presses into mine, our frames melding together as easily as two perfectly connected puzzle pieces, it came to realization that if giving myself to the little morning star, the temptation hidden behind a holy facade, was a crime, then he’d be the one sin I wouldn’t mind committing.

“I love it when you wear my clothes.” I quietly admit, whispering directly into the younger’s ear.

I slightly smile and admire the way his eyes flutter shut and a content sigh leaves his lips, his body completely relaxing and practically depending on my own to keep him standing.

“I love wearing your clothes.” He soon confesses, just as quietly.

For how long we stood there, I haven’t the slightest clue. Time spent with Taehyung is always immeasurable, especially in moments like these where we don’t speak and don’t move, only revel in the warm, comfortable embrace of the other. When we finally let go, it’s when my lips trace the soft, sugary sweet skin of Taehyung’s shoulder and neck, mapping out every gentle curve and beauty mark even though they’ve long since been embedded in my memory. His fingers lightly grasp onto my chin, and without any struggle I let him lift my face to meet his. His starry eyes hold a fondness so entirely raw and pure, and if you look close enough, you could almost see little, yet bright, stars dancing inside of golden specks in the green irises.

His gaze makes me feel exposed, as if there wasn’t a single thing I could hide from it, my entire being is a display for him to study, yet at the same time I’m completely enraptured by it, and in the back of my head I know that it’s only my morning star who can make me feel this way, and I know that it’s the same for him when it comes to me. Our eye contact momentarily breaks only when I see the younger’s lips beginning to part in my peripheral vision, and my eyes dart down to watch as he slowly licks his lower lip, and then to the blossoming rose color dusting his cheeks, and finally back to his enchanting eyes.

“Yeoubi,” One word, a soft murmur, and I can already feel myself going weak in the knees, and the urge to please the blonde grow with every passing second.

“Yes, bun?” I quietly question, waiting attentively to hear whatever it is he wants.

Yet a little smile graces his features, a gentle upwards curve of his peachy lips, and the faintest taste of blackberries lingers on my tongue after he kisses me.

“Go get dressed, Yeoubi. I’ve already grabbed clothes for you.” He tells me.

“Thank you, my Luc,” I reply, gently kissing his forehead.

A light giggle leaves his lips at the nickname, his eyes closing and nose cutely scrunching up in the process. The warmth of his body soon leaves as he glides over to the bed, but I can still feel a burning in my chest as I watch him. He hands me some folded clothes and shoos me off into the bathroom once more. I quickly dress myself in the t-shirt and sweatpants, a foreign kind of eagerness building in me to see what Taehyung has planned for today. In the past, I’ve never quite celebrated my birthday, it just never seemed like an important day to me. In contrast, it seemed more hypocritical to celebrate life when my very occupation is one that actively takes part in taking other’s lives.

But Taehyung, like many of his other views, thinks differently, so seeing whatever the younger has planned will be interesting. A rectangular black box is what awaits me when I leave the bathroom again, sleek and shiny and tied shut by a red ribbon, a neat bow sitting directly in the middle. The large box is held in Taehyung’s hands, a bright smile on his face as he presents it to me.

“Happy birthday, Ggu!” He exclaims.

A smile slowly forms on my face, a slight laugh of disbelief leaving me.

“You got me a gift?” I rhetorically ask, coming closer. “You didn’t have to, Tae. Thank you.”

“Of course I had to get you a present, Ggukie! You give me gifts all the time, and besides, it’s your birthday! It’s practically a requirement!”

I laugh at his enthusiasm, but raise an eyebrow as I take the box from him and feel just how heavy it is.

“Tae, what the hell did you get?” I question, carefully setting it on the bed.

“Open it and find out!” He responds, taking a seat next to the box and watching me for my reaction.

I do as he says, carefully undoing the neat bow and unwrapping it from the box. I lift the cover off, placing it to the side, and stare at the contents of the box. Inside, in specific spots for each item, lay slick, black guns of different kinds. They range from AR’s to pistols, from shotguns to rifles, and even a sniper. But my favorite part? Each gun has a little, pure white bunny on it with red eyes, and a little star somewhere close by. On some the little bunny is chasing the star, in some he’s holding it, and in another he’s sleeping on top of it. The cute cartoons instantly bring a smile to my face and I look at Taehyung who stares at me with expectancy written on his features.

“Bunnies?” I ask him, smile slowly widening at his little blush and the way he shyly looks away.

“Well, when you smile it reminds me of bunnies. A-and the little star with him is me, because you call me morning star.” He explains.

A bubble of happiness builds up in me, and I don’t hesitate to cup Taehyung’s cheeks and plant a kiss on his lips. He laughs in the beginning, but soon he kisses me back, hands softly grabbing at the hem of my shirt.

“Do you like them?” He quietly asks once we pull apart.

“I love them.” I answer. “Thank you, baby.”

And he smiles, lightly kissing me again. A few minutes later and we’re in the kitchen, the younger clinging to my side with my arm wrapped around him as I face the most uncoordinated, off-pitch, and wild Happy Birthday song by the rest of Taehyung’s group who somehow eventually pull in Jackson and the others, extending the song by another three minutes. Afterwards, everyone hands me presents, which has me even more bewildered than watching Yoongi attempting high notes at the end of the birthday song.  _ When did everyone start giving me gifts for my birthday and what the hell did they even get me? _

The last part of that question is soon answered, as Tae and I sit in the living room and open everything. Most things were simple; jewelry, some books, a new schedule book. Namjoon got me a new laptop, and Jimin got me some new shirts, I’m assuming he found out my size from Tae. Tae puts on a movie once we’ve cleaned up all the wrapping paper and put everything away. We lay in a tangled heap on the couch as we watch an action movie. The day was mostly calm after that, Taehyung and I stayed basically in the same position for several more movies.

Lunchtime comes rolling in soon enough, and by then Taehyung drags me into the kitchen and we make lunch together. We make an assortment of food, yet enough for the both of us to share. I don’t usually cook, nor have I cooked often with Tae, but the handful of times I have they were always fun, even though everything with the younger is exciting. Taehyung sends me to get changed when there’s only a few last things to do, giving me no idea as to where we’re going. He only tells me to wear something warm but lightweight since it’s a bit chilly outside today.

I get dressed in a black sweater, matching jeans and shoes, and leave my hair in it’s slightly messy state. I don’t bring much with me, just my phone, keys, and wallet, then head over to Tae’s room to see if he’s there.

“One second!” He shouts after I knock, and a second later I can hear something falling down.

“Tae?” I immediately call out, placing my hand on the doorknob but not opening the door. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah! I’m good! Just- gimme a minute!” He screams back.

A few...... _ concerning _ ...sounds later and Taehyung opens the door. The smaller is dressed in a pair of light blue leggings and a fluffy, cream sweater over a white tank top, white converses on his feet.

Okay, let’s go!” He exclaims, not giving me a moment to say anything as he grabs my hand and starts dragging me out of the house.

I’m much too intrigued to see where he’s taking me to ask where he’s taking me, if that makes sense. Though when I notice us on a certain path in the woods behind the mansion it becomes apparent. The younger is bringing me to the lake. Taehyung found me there a week or so ago, somehow, when I was bored out of my mind, but also feeling suffocated in the big house. It usually doesn’t bother me, but sometimes it will come to mind how empty and dark and lonely the house is, and I find myself in need of an escape in which case I go to the lake.

I’ve never brought anyone to the lake before, yet everyone knows that it’s where I go and so they stay clear of it. I’m not sure how long I was out there for, staring at the calm waters with a blank mind, and I thought I imagined Taehyung’s arms wrapping around my shoulders, a soft blanket enveloping us both. I thought it was just a fever dream, feeling his soft kiss on the back of my neck and shoulders and hearing him sing a quiet siren song in my ear. But then I awoke the next morning, laying on the soft grass, and hugging the smaller close to my body with the blanket just barely covering us.

We didn’t talk much about it, mostly because as soon as we got back home we went to Tae’s room and fell back asleep. Being at the lake this time around feels different, being led there by the younger who skips ahead of me, our hands still entwined, with a light hum on his lips. I’m not sure how he got it here in such a short time, but when the trees finally break to create a little cove around us, I see a white blanket covering the grass and a picnic basket right on top, both just a foot away from the water.

“We’re having a picnic!” Taehyung exclaims, pulling me down onto the blanket.

“Oh? Have you ever been on one before?” I ask while I watch him take food out of the basket.

“Two or three, I remember one with Joonie and Jinnie and another with Yoonie, but I think Chim Chim and I had a short one a long time ago. I can’t remember.”

Taehyung and I enjoy our lunch under the sun, a soft breeze brushing past once in a while, and both of us having random conversations. It was a simple moment, but more than enough for me. Simple moments are my favorite with Taehyung, I get to see a different, docile yet energetic side of him. Taehyung finishes eating before me, I’m not sure how he eats so fast but I’m guessing it has something to do with his cutely stuffed cheeks that remind me of a hamster, and as I finish the rest of my food he packs the dishes away and grabs something else from the basket. For a while he just watches me, not saying anything, and as soon as I swallow my food and start to ask him what’s wrong, he speaks.

“Ggu......I love you.”

........

“What?”

_ Did he just- _

_ How do I- _

_ What- _

_ Is he serious- _

_ Is this a prank- _

_ Did he  _ really _ just say- _

_.......how the fuck do I respond? _

Taehyung’s laughter pulls me from my stupor, and I stare at him like a deer caught in headlights.

“I said I love you, silly Yeoubi. You’re my best friend, I love you the- wait, would it be the most since you’re my friend or the sixth most as my hyung? But I don’t have favorites, I love all my hyungs. So does that mean I don’t say ‘most’ at all? Ahhhh, this is confusing, I don’t wanna think about it now. The point is, I love you.” He says.

And yet I continue to stare, struggling to come up with a response.

“Tae- I- I’m not- I mean I don’t- Fuck, how do I say this-” Tae cuts me off.

“Ggukie you’re adorable all flustered like this, but please calm down, you look like you’re about to pass out.” And then he pauses, giving me a small smile before pecking my nose. “I didn’t say ‘I love you’ to hear it back. I said it so that you know. I know you care about me and that you show it through actions rather than words, so don’t feel pressured to say it back to me. Just know that I love you.”

His words calm me down more than I imagined I would, but before I can respond he pulls out something from behind his back. In his hands he holds two stuffed bears the size of a large laptop. Both wear matching pajamas and hoods, one in light pink and the other in light blue.

“I know you don’t like stuffies but I saw them while I was at the store the other day and just- look at how cute they are! You don’t even have to have it on your bed or anything, you could leave it in your closet for all I care, but just  _ look _ at their cute faces!”

I laugh at the cute face Taehyung makes and take the blue bear from him, holding it in my lap and looking at its kawaii face.

“Yeah, they are cute.... I’m naming this one Luci.” I tell him.

A bright smile graces the other’s face when I look up at him, and he holds the pink bear to his chest.

“I’m naming mine Kookie.”

  
  


\---

  
  


After our picnic Taehyung and I went back home and watched more movies. Surprisingly, we missed dinner, but then again, Jin wasn’t screaming at us to get to the kitchen before he boils our teeth, so it was easy to forget. In the middle of our last movie, though, Jimin came and dragged Taehyung away (quite literally, he grabbed him by his ankles and dragged him off of the couch), but not before shouting at me to change clothes because we’re going to the club.

I stay seated on the couch, watching as Jimin drags a squirming Taehyung around, and then listen to Jimin’s screams once Taehyung gets free and starts chasing him. Once they begin to fade away upstairs I head up to my room to get changed, going from an all black outfit to a gold shirt with black and grey floral designs and black slacks and dress shoes. The sleeves only come down to just past my elbows, and I make sure it’s tucked into my pants. I go to the bathroom to do my hair, going with my old side part. Just as I finish I hear a knock on my door and shout for whoever it is to come in.

“Ggu, it’s me, I’m grabbing my boots.” I hear Tae say.

“Okay.”

I quickly scan myself in the mirror, making sure I look fine, and then head back into my bedroom. Taehyung is in the closet once I get out and I grab everything I need before sitting on the edge of the bed.

“Tae, do you have everything you need?” I ask.

“Yup! I got it all before coming here so I didn’t have to go back.” I hear him pause and quietly swear. “Damn thick thighs, making it so hard to zip my boots up.”

I chuckle at that and patiently wait for the younger to come out. A few moments and swear words later he does, looking as amazing as ever. His hair is curled, small strands falling in front of his face which he easily tucks behind his ears which are decorated with long, silver earrings. He wears only a small bit of makeup, as usual when he does, and a silver, snake designed lip ring with green eyes is wrapped snugly around his lower lip. Around his neck is a silver choker embedded with small diamonds and a padlock hanging down the middle. He wears an all black, skin tight romper that just barely covers his ass, parts of the fabric around his neck and middle sheer to reveal most of his tattoos. Black thigh high boots cover his legs and hug his thighs tightly, though not in a confining way.

I let out a whistle. “You sure know how to dress up, don’t you?”

Taehyung chuckles. “I could say the same about you. Gold looks great on you, you should wear it more often.”

“I’ll think about it. Let’s get going now, yeah?”

“Just a minute, I have something to give you.”

“Another gift? Tae, you’ve already given me a lot.”

He just smiles and shakes his head before handing me a small, rectangular box. I open the box, finding a silver choker very similar to Tae’s inside, but instead of there being a padlock attached to it, there’s a key. I smile slightly, running my fingers across the silver before asking Tae to put it on me. He does so without any words, and when I turn around to face him he immediately kisses me, arms draped over my shoulders as my own grab ahold of his waist.

“Happy birthday, my Yeoubi.” He tells me.

I kiss him again in response and keep my arm around his waist as we head downstairs. Everyone is waiting for us when we get there, and as soon as we arrive everyone cheers and heads out to the cars. The drive to the club (we’re going to my club, Zemblanity) is an interesting one full of loud singing and pregame shots. At the club people stop and gawk at us as we head to the VIP section. I see some staring at Taehyung, specifically, as the blonde walks next to me with my arm around his waist. He doesn’t pay any attention to their gazes, especially when we sit down and the younger takes his place on my lap, one hand around my shoulder and playing with the hair at the nape of my neck, and the other playing with my fingers on his lap.

“Do you want anything to drink, bun?” I ask.

He scrunches his nose up slightly in disgust before falling into a pensive expression.

“Something sweet.” He answers.

I nod and flag down a bartender to order our drinks. Everyone parties around us, either dancing on the dance floor or taking shots and talking about random things. Meanwhile, Tae and I stay seated, watching the commotion around us. At least, we were until a certain song came on, causing Tae to whip his head around to find Jimin who turned to find Taehyung at the same time. The two share some sort of telepathic conversation before Taehyung dashes to the other on the dance floor.

“Tie me up like I’m surprised. Let’s role play, I wear a disguise. I want you to park that big Mack truck right in this little garage. Make it cream, make me scream. Out in public, make a scene. I don’t cook, I don’t clean, but let me tell you how I got this ring.” Taehyung and Jimin sing, bodies moving provocatively against each other.

I watch the scene, more of Taehyung and the ways his body moves and the faces he makes as he raps along to the song. My surroundings fade out as I focus only on Taehyung, and when he does a high kick before slut dropping I feel my body getting hotter and hotter. His movements are agonizingly seductive, all I can do is watch as he shakes his ass. But when I notice another man get close to him and wrap his arm around Taehyung’s tiny waist I immediately stand up and head over to them, ignoring the few calls behind me asking me where I’m going.

As soon as Jimin sees me approaching them, he smirks and leaves Tae’s side, having come over as soon as the man grabbed Tae. Without hesitation, I grab Taehyung’s hips from behind and pull him flush against me, the smaller almost immediately relaxing against me as I glare at the man.

“Don’t fucking touch him again.” I growl.

In a flash the man is gone, fear across his face as he scuttles away. Once he’s gone, Taehyung turns to look at me over his shoulder, smiling a bit.

“Thank you, my possessive Yeoubi, but I had it.” He says, pecking my jaw.

I lean down to properly kiss him on the lips.

“I don’t like people touching things that don’t belong to them.” I tell him.

“Oh? So I’m yours? Has my Yeoubi finally fallen for me? Ah, I love you too, Ggukie. Let’s move to Italy, adopt a cat and three dogs and grow old together.”

We both laugh at that, and again the rest of the world fades away.

“I’m joking, but I am yours to command however you please. But abuse that privilege and I’m yoinking your kneecaps.” Tae says.

“Again with my knees, leave my knees alone.”

“Never!” We both laugh again. “Dance with me, Yeoubi?”

He didn’t need to ask twice. Although, it wasn’t so much of us dancing as it was us grinding against each other, but neither of us really minded. We danced for a while before heading back to the VIP section and sitting. Hours pass with us in the club, everyone having fun doing whatever. I finally rally everyone together to go home when I notice Tae falling asleep in my lap. The younger is practically a zombie as I carry him to my room and change him into pajamas. He falls limply onto the bed as soon as I get a hoodie on him, and I chuckle at him before placing him beneath the blankets.

I quickly change into pajamas myself and am about to get into bed when I get an email about an issue I have to face now. I sigh, having hoped to end this night with falling asleep next to Tae after hours at the club, but I do have a mafia to run. I head to my office, making sure not to wake the younger, although with how tired he is I doubt he’d wake up even if I made noise. I immediately get started on figuring out what the fuck is wrong and fixing it once I get to my office, too immersed in my work to see my sister coming in.

“You’re working this late?”

I slightly flinch at the new voice, not expecting anyone this late and certainly not Eunae. She’s rarely ever come to my office before, so seeing her here is a bit of a shock.

“Something important came up.” I reply after a moment.

She nods before slowly coming closer and taking a seat across from me.

“So......you actually celebrated your birthday this year.”

“Yes, the first time in- what? Fifteen? Sixteen years?”

“It’s been a while since either of us had a birthday party.” Silence. “Did you.......did you have fun?”

“Yeah, I did. Taehyung planned a lot for me.”

“Yeah, he did.” More silence. “You two are pretty close, huh?”

“We’re friends.”

“You seem like more than friends to me.” There was something about the way she said it that made me uneasy. Almost as if she were jealous.

“Is there something you want to say, Eunae? I’m busy right now.”

“Yeah, actually, I do. It’s about you and Taehyung.”

I stiffen slightly. “What about us?”

“At the club I saw how close you two are and how obvious you are about it, it’s worrying-”

“Worrying?”

“Look, just hear me out. Taehyung and his group came to us for  _ protection _ . There are people after them, people apparently so dangerous that a group such as the Rose who pulled off mind blowing operations without getting caught with only six members had to come to us just for safety. They destroyed three of our biggest enemies just for us, just to be protected. If people start to find out just how close you are with Taehyung, they’re going to start going after him, and he’s going to have an even bigger target on his back. I know, the kid is absolutely insane and more than capable of taking care of himself, but is he really strong enough to take on his enemies plus ours at the same time? And if something happens to him, what’s going to happen to you? How are you going to reat? How is his family going to react? How will it affect us? Just.......just think about it.”

Eunae leaves after that, leaving me alone with my thoughts. Taehyung has given me so much. He’s given me happiness, he’s given me love. He’s given me reasons to be excited about waking up in the morning, he’s given me something, or rather  _ someone _ , to care about other than my work. He’s effortlessly walked into my life and made himself a part of it, made it so that I could barely go a day without seeing his face or holding him in my arms.

_ And if something happens to him I don’t know what I’d do. _

I can’t let him get hurt because of me. I can’t let anyone go after him because of me. I can’t allow another scar to be added to his collection because of me.

_ I can’t let him wake up in the middle of the night, in tears and full of fear from a nightmare of things they’ve done to him because of me. _

But Taehyung......Taehyung is strong. Taehyung is the strongest person I know. Taehyung can destroy an entire mafia on his own, Taehyung can find anything that desires to be hidden, Taehyung can bend any man or woman to his will.

_ But Taehyung is a victim of his mind. _

His mind will torture him until there’s nothing left, it will remind him of his pain over and over again. And I can’t let that happen. I can’t give his demons more fuel to add to the fire. Taehyung was happy before meeting me......he’ll be happy without me, too. I won’t be leaving his side completely, but I can’t let the relationship we have going on now to continue. Not now, not until it’s safer and there’s not as many people after him.

_ “If there’s ever anything on your mind or something bothering you, you can talk to me.” _

There isn’t anything to talk about. The answer is clear. I love you.

So I have to let you go.


	33. 31

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Someone you loved.

_ Taehyung _

_ He’s ignoring me _ .

A few days have passed since Jeongguk’s birthday, and ever since the morning after, I realized something was wrong. It started as soon as I woke up and found the space in the bed beside me empty. Everytime Jeongguk and I spent the night together, the older would always wait until I woke up to get out of bed. No matter how long it took or what we had to do for the day, he’d always stay. I brushed it off then, I figured there was something extremely important he had to do and that he had to leave. That was also my reasoning when I didn’t see the older at breakfast.

I went to his office after I finished eating. It’s one of the only two places Jeongguk goes, so it’s usually easy to find him. He was there, of course, wearing pajamas still, but completely immersed in his work. When I called out for him, he stilled, he didn’t immediately answer. I ignored the uneasy feeling in my stomach. He looked up at me with blank eyes and an even blanker face.

“Yes?”

There wasn’t a smile, big or small. There wasn’t a pet name. There wasn’t an invitation to sit on his lap. There was just a short, curt “yes”. I had asked him what was wrong, if there was something bothering him. Instead of him sighing and giving me a tired nod or smile he just gave me an even stricter, and colder “I’m fine”.  _ He’s just working a lot, _ I told myself as I left,  _ he just doesn’t want to be distracted right now. _ So I waited. Patiently. I worked out, I practiced my sewing, I hung out with the others, and when the sun was at its highest I went to Jeongguk’s room. He wasn’t there, it was still early after all, so I went to the kitchen and made coffee and hot chocolate and brought it up to his office along with the chocolate chip muffins I made only a few hours before.

They were still warm.

Jeongguk was still in his office, as if he hadn’t moved an inch since I left him, and exhaustion plagued his features. I don’t know what work he had been doing all day, but I know none of the things I gave him was enough to stress him out to this degree. Yet when I pointed it out, he just repeated the words “I’m fine” again and thanked me for the coffee. And then he told me he still had some things left to take care of and that I shouldn’t wait for him. I wanted to argue, I always do, I never leave him to stress himself with work.

But he gave me a look when he told me that. It was a stern look, a look he never gave me before. It almost felt as though he was going to scold me if I tried to disobey, and something in me told me that if he did it wouldn’t be like the other times. This time it would be worse, he’d be angry with me, and I don’t want that. So I nodded, I tried to hide my disappointment and hurt, I didn’t look him in the eyes as I finished my hot chocolate and left.

And I don’t think he even ate a muffin.

I tried to get my mind off of the suffocatingly, terrifying, anxiety-inducing interaction with Gguk after I left. I did work (I managed to get nearly a month’s worth of work done, tunnel vision plus stress working equals quickly finished work, I guess), I worked on the SIO case and followed up on a few leads, most ending up nowhere but others actually landing me in a good spot, then afterwards I got dragged out to the courtyard by Jimin to watch Yoongi and Hobi hyung play basketball with some others. It was after that I decided to bake, baking always cheers me up and takes my mind off of things.

I made cakes, lots of them, and spent hours designing them. It was late into the night already when I finished, almost one am, so I cleaned up and excitedly made my way to Jeongguk’s room. I wanted to surprise him. I’d draw a nice, warm bath with salts (no bath bombs because he doesn’t really like them, but he’ll have the salts any day), and then a massage, and then I’d stuff him with sweets until he couldn’t eat anymore. We’d fall asleep in each other’s arms. Everything would be okay again.

But it didn’t turn out the way I wanted it to.

Jeongguk wasn’t in the room when I got there, and even after I drew the bath he didn’t come. I waited for him, watching the minutes tick by on my phone until it died on me, but he never came. I don’t remember falling asleep, but I suppose laying on his bed, surrounded by the sheets and pillows which were thick with his scent, it wasn’t hard to imagine that I was out like a light.

And yet when I woke up Jeongguk wasn’t there again.

The other side of the bed hadn’t even looked as though it had been touched.

It wasn’t hard to notice that the days were becoming the same as the last, Jeongguk stayed holed up in his office doing “work”, ignoring any and everybody; including me. He rarely ever spoke to me, only the occasional “yes,” and “no,” and “I’m fine,” or “don’t wait for me”, all spoken in quiet, yet strong and cold tones. Whenever I tried to ask him if something was wrong or if I could help him he’d quickly end the conversation and dismiss me. I really tried to not let it affect me, but how could I not? How I could I not be hurt when I went from spending almost every moment with Jeongguk, opening my heart and mind to him, trusting him so wholeheartedly and receiving it back, to sudden coldness and avoidance. Though I constantly told myself that it’s his work that’s making him this way, something else in me spoke a different reason why I’m on the receiving end of Jeongguk’s austere personality.

_ He doesn’t like you anymore. _

I pushed the thought to the back of my head, but not before a suffocating feeling would grasp at my lungs. They’d burn and ache and cry for air but their cries fell upon deaf ears. Hands would wrap around my throat oh so tightly, so tight I’d have to check if there were marks left behind. My heart would beat and beat and beat until my body was light and risked suddenly collapsing on me with the slightest breeze. Tears would collect in my eyes, and I’d never realize they were falling until I tasted the salt on my lips. The fear and anguish were weights tied to my ankles, drawing me into the dark waters of despair which filled my lungs.

And now, as I sit alone in my bathtub, in my own room because staying in Jeongguk’s room alone makes me feel even worse, the cold water surrounding me does nothing to numb the pain in my chest. The only one that could save me was Jeongguk, there’s no place safer than being wrapped in his arms, no place that makes me more at peace than next to him, no words that could calm me as much as the soft murmurs he speaks into my ears. But Jeongguk isn’t here now, Jeongguk left me. And it hurts. Oh  _ God _ does it hurt. I guess I got kinda used to being someone he loves.  _ Silly Taehyung. He doesn’t love you. _

_ He never did. _

“No, shut up! You’re wrong! He does love me! He does!” I cry out, slowly sinking deeper into the water.

_ He doesn’t. He never said he did, did he? You cut him off before he could say anything. Why? Because you knew he wouldn’t say it back. _

“No, no you’re wrong. You’re wrong. He loves me. He loves me. He loves me. He lo-”

_ Get it through your thick skull that he doesn’t love you! Why must you keep torturing yourself like this? Just accept it and move on! _

“No, I c-can’t. I can’t. I’m his, he’s mine-”

_ Not anymore. Just let him go, he threw you away. _

“No! H-He didn’t! I won’t!”

_ Face it already, Taehyung. _

“There’s nothing to face! You’re just a liar! A mean liar who wants to hurt me! I won’t ever listen to you!”

_ Fine then! Don’t listen! And when he finally breaks what’s left of your pathetic little heart, don’t come crawling back to me! _

A sharp pain erupts through my skull and a loud gasp leaves my lips, hands clutching at my aching skull. The world turns white for a while, during which all the strength leaves my tired bones and muscles, and my body numbly sinks further into the waters. My eyes softly shut, thrusting me into pitch black as all but my nose lies beneath the frigid waters. The world becomes nothing but blocks of black and white, my body is a limp puppet whose puppeteer has left on a shelf. Time is naught but a concept as I lie in the water, feeling so numb physically, but unable to protect myself as my mind tears me apart.

_ He loves me. _

_ He doesn’t love me. _

_ He needs me. _

_ He threw me away. _

_ He’s mine. _

_ I’m not his. _

Hands carefully, oh so carefully, grasp around my body and lift me from the water. I don’t struggle as I’m brought against someone’s body and a warm, soft towel is draped around me. Instead I lean into them, relaxing against them as I bury my face in their neck, allowing their soft scent to soothe me.

_ Parchment and leather. _

“What are you doing in cold water this late, little apricity? You know you’ll get sick.” Namjoon softly says as he picks me up.

I wrap my arms and legs around him, nuzzling further into his frame and not yet answering his question.

“Warm baths make me tired.” I whisper once he sets me on the bed.

I watch as he grabs pajamas from my dresser; a fluffy, cream coloured oversized hoodie with cat ears on the hood and paws stitched onto the sleeves, and matching colored shorts.

“Shouldn’t you want to be tired?” Namjoon asks before grabbing the towel and carefully drying my hair. “It’s almost one in the morning, apricity.”

“‘M sorry. I’ve just been thinking a lot. Over-thinking again, probably.”

He gives me a small, knowing smile. “Would you like to talk about it?”

“When I’m done being unnecessarily emotionally taxed by it, definitely.”

Namjoon chuckles, though it’s a bit of a sarcastic one. Afterall, he knows I won’t ever stop being emotionally affected by what’s bothering me. He dresses me in my pajamas and tucks me into bed, staying by my side for a while and playing with my hair. I almost fall asleep by the action, but before I can completely succumb to it, I peek open my eyes and look over to the other side of the bed. Kookie lays on the pillow next to me, the silver around his neck catching my eye. My lock choker lays on his neck, reminding me of the real meaning behind it - the reason why I got the matching chokers for Jeongguk and I. I take Kookie into my arms, holding him close to my chest as I close my eyes again. You may not love me, Jeongguk, but I love you.

And I’m never letting you go.


	34. 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I love him?

_ Taehyung _

The halls feel emptier than usual as I walk through them, they feel bigger, colder, and darker. There’s a heaviness in my bones, weights tie down my limbs, my feet drag against the cold floor. A slight ringing sound fills my ears, drowning out the morning excitement as I head into the kitchen. Almost as soon as I walk inside, Bambam’s arm is across my shoulder and he guides me to sit down, talking animatedly about something I can’t quite catch onto. Despite that, I still manage to smile a bit as he laughs and we sit.

Jackson and JB join us soon, and then Yoongi and Jimin hyung. It makes me happy, seeing everyone gathered in one spot with elated smiles and bright laughter. It almost makes me forget about the one, missing person from the table.  _ Almost _ . It’s been a week since Jeongguk started ignoring me, a week of his cold, impassive behaviour. I want to talk to him about it, I want him to open up to me, but how can I do it if he won’t even say more than five words to me? I can’t just knock him out, tie him up in the cellar and break his bones until he tells me. He has to come to me first, he has to want to tell me.

_ And why would he tell the one person he’s avoiding like the plague? _

Shut up, nobody asked you.

_ Fall in a ditch and rot. _

You first.

Today turns out to just be just another slow day. After breakfast it was just a matter of finding something to fill the time. After a “heavy” debation I decide on baking. Again.  _ Thank goodness we went shopping a few days ago. _ I start off making cookies, and then cupcakes, and then cakes. The countertops and tables and even seats were full of confections and yet I couldn’t help but continue to bake more. It was as if my mind had just shut down and my body was working on its own, a machine programmed to do one thing and one thing alone; bake. Quite a few people come and go throughout the day, only sometimes pausing to carry a conversation. What, exactly, we talked about, I couldn’t tell you.

I don’t even remember opening my mouth half the time to speak or the sound of my voice, much less the topic. I stand frozen in the middle of the kitchen, eyes staring unmovingly at the timer ticking down on the stove top. When it finally goes off my body starts back up again, and I move to put on oven mittens before taking out a red velvet cake. I leave it to cool on the counter before going to get yet another cake pan full of cake batter, mango, this time, and put it in the oven. However, before I can open the oven again, a small hand stops me.

“Tae, what are you doing?” Jimin softly asks me, a worried look painted across his face.

“‘M baking.”

“I can see that, but why are you baking so much? You’ve made enough sweets to feed an army.”

I didn’t have an answer for him, so I just stood there and stared at him. He sighs softly, taking the pan from my hands and finding someplace to put it. A moment later and he’s taken the mittens off of my hands and turned the oven off before dragging me to the living room and sitting me down. He takes my hands in his, resting them on his lap as he gives me a concerned and pleading look.

“Tae, please, talk to me. You’ve been so reserved recently. You’re so quiet, you rarely smile, always in your own world and frowning. There’s something on your mind, please, tell me what’s bothering you. I can’t stand seeing you like this. I miss my happy Taetae.” He says.

“Chim, I’m fine. I’ve just been in my mind a lot. There’s nothing to worry about.”

“Tae you’re  _ stress baking _ again! First it’s cookies, then cupcakes, then cakes, then tarts, and then bread and then all you do all day is watch bread rise and snap and when you snap you disappear for days at a time and when you come back you’re always covered in blood and you look so dead inside and- and- and-” A large sob cuts him off, the silver haired male bursting into tears.

“C-Chim, why are you crying? Stop it.”

I gently wrap my arms around him, rubbing his back in hopes of calming him down. He does after a minute or two, only slightly sniffling now. When he pulls away from me his eyes are puffy and his cheeks and nose are a bright red, tear stains running down his cheeks.

“I can’t see you like that again, Tae. I can’t watch you destroy yourself like that. Please, let me in, as your hyung.”

Guilt.

All I felt was guilt.

I was too much of a self absorbed brat, sulking over such a stupid thing that’s probably not even what it seems, to notice how my actions were affecting everyone else, especially my hyungs. They’ve always been protective of me, knowing just how out of hand I can get, how violent I can get, how depressed I can get. They do their best to keep me safe and happy, but relationships, no matter what kind, are a two way thing. Both parties have to participate, we both have to communicate, and I guess I’ve been neglecting that part recently. So, feeling ashamed of myself, I bow my head and softly gnaw on my lower lip.

“It’s stupid, hyungie, it really is.” I mumble.

“It’s not stupid if it’s stressing you out this much. And even if it was, don’t you think it’d be better to talk with someone about it and figure out if it’s really worth worrying over?” Jimin asks.

I sigh, nodding slightly.

“Talk to me, Tae, what’s on your mind.”

And how could I not tell him? How could I keep the words that so desperately begged to spill from my lips inside? Words that tear my throat and burn my tongue as soon as I utter them.

“I don’t think Jeongguk likes me anymore.”

The other looks stunned for a moment, then confused.

“What do you mean, Tae? You’ve practically got Jeon on a leash for you, the man is so damn ready to give you everything.”

I shake my head, denying the statement.

“No, I don’t, he’s not. Haven’t you noticed it, Chim? The past week he’s been shutting himself up in his office. He rarely comes out, he doesn’t talk to anyone, me least of all. It’s always ‘I’m busy’ or ‘I’m working’ or ‘I’m fine’ and before I can ever get a word in he sends me out. He doesn’t smile anymore, there’s no pet names, no hugs, no kisses. A-a-and h-he always g-gives me t-this l-look, like h-he’s t-t-tired of s-seeing me. H-he doesn’t e-even c-come to b-bed w-when I’m t-there.” I stutter at the end, trying to hold back tears that I know are going to fall soon.

“Oh bubba, come here, bubs.”

It’s Jimin’s turn to hug me, the lump in my throat suffocating and not even gasping will allow me the luxury of breathing. The only sound I can hear is that of my racing heart, trying to escape my chest, the aching against my rib cage the only thing my numb body can actually feel. Tears blur my vision and when Jimin pulls away and cups my face so that I can face him, all I can see of him is a mess of colors.

“Tae, bubs,  _ breathe _ . Breathe for me, okay?” I start to rapidly shake my head, trying to tell him I can’t, but he just holds me tighter. “C’mon, you can do it. You’re a strong boy, yeah? You can get through this, but first you gotta breathe for me.”

He wipes my tears, allowing me to see him as he takes deep breaths, demonstrating what he wants me to do. I try my best, shakily taking in a breath before choking on a sob and trying again. For the next few minutes I follow the older’s ministrations, slowly but surely calming down.

“There you go, bubs, just keep breathing like that.” Jimin tells me after I manage to breathe without his assistance.

I nod once, still crying but not to the point where I can’t breathe.

“Now, are you sure that he’s ignoring you? Maybe he’s just overworking himself like before.” He asks.

“No, he’s not. I know my Jeonggukie like the back of my hand. He may work himself to exhaustion but he does know when to take a break. This Jeonggukie.......this isn’t my Jeonggukie. I want my Jeonggukie back.” I begin to cry harder, a sense of dread filling my body as I hug myself. “What am I going to do, Jiminie? I-I c-can’t lose m-my G-ggukie, h-he means t-too mu-uch to m-me. B-but G-ggukie doesn’t l-like me a-anymore. I-I need h-him! I-I n-need him! H-He’s m-my b-bestf-friend, I c-can’t b-be wi-without h-him. H-He’s th-the o-only one wh-who unders-stands. H-He’s m-my ha-hap-piness, C-Chim. I l-love him. I lo-ove him. I-I l-love hi-m.”

Jimin wraps me in a tight hug, trying to soothe me as I repeatedly say “I love him” through my tears. And, perhaps, it was the first time since meeting Jeongguk that I didn’t feel his eyes on me from the other side of the room.

\---

The next morning I could feel everyone’s pitying gaze on me, staring me down as I push my pancakes around my plate. After around five minutes of silence and staring I finally sigh and set my fork down, giving everyone a tired look.

“How much longer will you all stare at me?” I question, my voice weak with exhaustion.

A few look away, their cheeks slightly rosy and I tiredly shrug Jeongguk’s hoodie back into place.

“I don’t get it. Why the fuck are we all just sitting here? Why don’t we just go to Jeon’s office and ask him what the fuck he’s doing?” Yoongi asks aggressively, causing me to chuckle.

“He won’t even talk to me, what makes you think he’ll talk to you? No offense, but none of you know him like I do, and he won’t just explain himself to anyone.”

“That’s bullshit.”

I chuckle again. “Don’t act as if you aren’t the same, hyung.”

There’s a few minutes of silence in which I go to grab my cup of tea, but find no cup nearby. It’s then that I realize I forgot my tea, but I don’t have enough energy to make a cup. So, even more dejectedly, I go back to pushing my pancakes around my plate instead of eating it.

“So what then? Are you just going to let this continue?” Mark questions.

“What would you like me to do that I haven’t already tried? Torture him? Ignore him back? Beat up his men again? Be a nuisance? No, I’m not doing it. I want him to come to me. I want him to open up to me without me asking for it. That’s really all I can ask for, isn’t it?” I respond.

Before anyone can reply, in walks the person we’ve all been talking about. It was a bit of a shock to see Jeongguk in the kitchen for breakfast after so long, but here he is in just a t-shirt and sweats. He doesn’t appear as tired as he usually does,  _ he was probably able to sleep without me in his bed with him _ , but his eyes still carry exhaustion within them. He shortly glances at the table, and I’m sure I imagined the flash of sadness in his eyes when he looks at me, before heading to the counter and grabbing breakfast. While his back is turned to us, I quickly give everyone a look that says “keep your mouths shut”.

They begrudgingly agree and continue to eat their breakfast, making random conversations with each other to try and relieve the tension. I don’t even bother pretending to pay attention to what they’re talking about, eyes lowering to my untouched plate, the food only pushed around to appear as though some of it was eaten. I’m slightly startled, however, when a small cup is placed in front of me.

A tea cup.

I stare at the dark liquid slowly swirling in the pearly white glass, eyes unconsciously following the pale, inked hand that set it before me. Jeongguk doesn’t look at me as he sits down, nor does he say anything after handing me the tea. I softly gulp as I turn away, staring back at the tea. Slowly, and with shaking hands, I reach out and grab the cup with both hands, cradling it gently as though it’s the most fragile thing. Carefully, I bring it to my lips, gently blowing on it before taking a sip.

The sweet warmth spreads through my body, and for the first time in a while I feel like I’m going to be okay.  _ But why.........why did it have to take Jeongguk just giving me a cup of tea to feel this way. Why am I becoming so dependent on him? Why does this hurt so much? Why is everything so difficult? _ All of my questions remain unanswered, forgotten behind the taste of tea on my lips as I take slow sips. The tea replaces my breakfast, the well cooked meal too much for my stomach to handle at the moment. Once I finish my tea I still hold the small glass in my hands, staring at the bottom as if it will cause something, anything, to happen.

“Taehyungie, we’re going to play basketball. Come with us.” Jackson tells me, resting a hand on my arm.

Golden locks cover my eyes as I shake my head, and I don’t bother pushing them back.

“Not today, sorry hyung.” I reply.

“C’mon, please? You’ve been inside for like- ever-”

“That’s a hyperbole, hyung-”

“But true!” Bambam interrupts.

I make a small sound of amusement, shaking my head again as I finally set the tea cup down.

“I don’t feel like playing basketball right now, maybe another day.” I say, beginning to stand up.

However, Jackson’s hand on my arm again makes me stop, and I wait patiently as the older leans into my ear.

“Just come out for a bit, Tae. It’ll do you some good to get out of the manor for a bit and get some fresh air. Besides, I think you should get your mind off of this whole thing for a bit. You don’t even have to play if you don’t want to, we can do something else. Just come out with us.” He says.

I sigh softly before nodding slightly. “Fine, but if I win I get access to your closet.”

Jackson laughs as he steps back.

“Hell no, I’m not betting with you. You always win.”

“Damn straight.” I mumble, standing up and carrying my dishes to the sink.

The others seem to gain a burst of energy at my actions, and before I can even fully set my plate down I’m being dragged out of the kitchen by JB and Jinyoung, the rest of the boys running and laughing behind us. Although, just before I’m fully pulled away, I do manage to hear Jeongguk say something, the first actual sentence he’s spoken in a week.

“Namjoon, meet me in my office once you’ve finished.”

And then a moment later I feel the ground under me change from cold wood to warm stone and then soft grass. I lie limply in JB and Jinyoung’s arms, allowing my head to fall back and the warmth of the sun to warm me. Soon the grass under me changes to pavement, and I’m pushed back onto my feet. Since there’s an odd number of us, JB will be acting as referee for us. I’m on a team with Jinyoung and Youngjae, and Mark, Jackson, and Bambam are on the other team. We play rock paper scissors to decide who gets the ball first. Jackson’s team won so JB tossed him the ball and the game began.

I didn’t pay much attention, to be honest. I really don’t feel like playing basketball right now, I’m only doing it because Jackson asked me to. I don’t do much other than keep the other team from getting too close to the basket, but if they’re shooting half court shots and making it it’s not my issue. It isn’t until Jackson slides by me  _ twice _ to dunk the ball in that I finally take the game a bit more seriously. The more I focus on the game, the more pumped I get, and by the time JB calls the end of the game, the score being 53-42, I all but collapse on the hot pavement. It takes JB dragging me over to a bench to actually get under the shade instead of overheating.

“Jeez, Tae, you really went crazy in that last half there.” Mark says with a chuckle.

I let out a breathy laugh, laying tiredly on the grass, head on Bambam’s lap.

“I hate losing.” I tell him, smiling softly when I feel Bambam playing with my hair.

Like Jeongguk use-

_ I’m gonna stop you right there. _

Bitch.

_ Cunt. _

Whore.

_ Asswipe. _

Basta-

“It feels like it’s been forever since we’ve done this. When was the last time you even played a game like this with us?” Youngjae questions.

“Jae, I was just out here the other day watching you guys play basketball. I swear that’s all you guys ever play.” I answer, laughing when he throws a towel at me.

“Okay but seriously, when’s the last time all of us hung out like this, before shit got gloomy again?”

“Shit uhhhh-” Bambam trails off.

I chuckle and toss the towel at his face, laughing harder when he glares at me.

“When we played chess, fish brains. It’s the last time we all, well,  _ most _ of us, got together to play a game.”

“Wait wouldn’t it have been Jeon’s birthday?” Jackson asks.

“Nah, I’m pretty sure that’s when things went to shit. Well, after we all went to sleep. He never came to bed that night. Something must’ve happened that made him leave, usually he’s quick to come to bed when I’m already asleep.”

There’s an automatic, unanimous reply of “whipped” that makes me laugh.

“I really hope this problem gets solved soon, though. You guys are too cute together, and honestly, I’ve never seen Jeongguk smile since you got here. The man was practically a robot before you, it was a bit worrying, to be honest.” Mark suddenly says.

“Same here, though it’s a bit weird to see it, I prefer a laughing and smiling Jeongguk over a stoic one.” Jinyoung agrees.

There’s a chorus of agreements.

“And we’re here for you, if you ever need anything. Even if it’s ransacking Jeon’s closet for you.” Jackson adds, the last part making me chuckle.

“Thanks guys, it really means a lot to me.” I tell them with a smile.

“Of course, anything to help you two lovebirds finally get together.” Bambam responds.

I furrow my brows. “Lovebirds?”

“Oh come on, Tae, don’t even try to deny. You totally love him.” JB says.

“Well of course I do. He’s my best friend, why wouldn’t I love him?”

A strange silence follows after that, the others looking at me strangely.

“Tae......you’re kidding, right? There’s no way you love him just as a friend. You two are- there’s so much  _ more _ between you two, even an outsider can see that.” JB explains.

“Well, how else would I love him? I only love my family and my friends, there’s nothing else.”

“Have you never been  _ in love _ before, Tae? Like, romantically?” Youngjae asks.

“Ro......mantically? I.......no. I don’t think so. I don’t know. What.......what does it feel like to be in love?”

“People feel it differently, I suppose, but there are some things that most people feel.” Mark begins to tell me. “Your heart races when you see them or hear their name, they’re almost always on your mind, you always want to make them happy. You crave their affection, you love being near them. You try to stand out for them sometimes, do things that would impress them or that they’d like, sometimes even if it’s something you never thought you’d do before. You always listen to them, you always want to talk to them and know what’s on their mind. There’s.......there’s a lot of ways to explain it. Does that make sense to you?”

I nod slightly, brows furrowed deeply as I think about what Mark said.  _ A lot of what he said is what I feel around Jeongguk, but........is it true? Do I really love Jeongguk like that? Do I.......do I love him as a lover, and not a friend? _


	35. 33

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time may not wait for me, but will you?

_ Jeongguk _

_ He doesn’t smile anymore. _

Though Taehyung probably thinks I spend all of my time in my office now, I actually come out when I know the younger isn’t looking for me. Instead of him looking for me, I look for him. I don’t approach him, I just watch, he always seems to be too far in his own head to notice my prescence.  _ Of course he is, he’s probably wondering about why you’re being so cold towards him. _ I have to.......I have to do this, just until I can make things safer for him.  _ But that doesn’t make this any easier on either of us. _ Holding myself back from Taehyung proved to be harder than I thought, as I found my entire daily routine soon became focused around the blonde.

I’d wake up with the smaller laying on my chest or curled against my side and wait for him to wake up.  _ He gets pouty and upset when I leave while he’s asleep _ . Taehyung would shower first, and I’d find him clothes to wear before checking my phone for important emails and messages.  _ My closet is now an organized array of bright colours as Taehyung’s clothes became mixed with mine. _ I’d shower after Taehyung, and the younger would get my clothes out for me.  _ He’d insist on tying my tie for me when I wore suits, and more often than not he’d do my hair as well. _

He would open his mouth to ask me something, but I’d already know what he wanted, and would pick him up and carry him to breakfast.  _ He doesn’t have to ask for upsies anymore, and I can’t lie and say I haven’t grown fond of having him in my arms. _ We’d make each other’s plates for breakfast, I don’t remember when we started doing it or why, but it became a habit as well.  _ He likes extra strawberries on his pancakes, and with honey instead of syrup. And never give him juice for breakfast, he doesn’t like it right after he’s brushed his teeth, only tea with a dash of milk and honey. _ After breakfast I’d give him a small kiss on his forehead before going up to my office.  _ But turn around almost as soon as I leave the kitchen because Taehyung didn’t get to kiss me back. _

I’d work until lunch time, most of the time not doing as much as I used to because Taehyung’s taken care of most of it, and by noon I’d be in the kitchen, watching as the blonde makes us lunch.  _ He hates it when I skip meals, and I don’t even want to think about how he reacted the handful of times he found out I did skip lunch and maybe even dinner. _ After lunch I’d go back to work, but by that time with Taehyung by my side.  _ He liked company while doing his own work, and the red lights in his own workshop could provide only so much comfort. _ We’d work in a comfortable silence most of the time, but sometimes we’d have random, pointless conversations that I’d enjoy more than I thought.  _ Any conversation with Taehyung is interesting. _

Dinner would roll around soon enough, and we’d walk down together.  _ Taehyung has a habit of skipping ahead of me, hand outstretched back towards me as our hands remained tightly intertwined. _ And after dinner, well, after the younger finished eating, he’d tiredly crawl into my lap and cling to me.  _ He becomes needy and clingy when he’s tired, especially after a meal, and usually needs someone to take him to bed. _ I’d carry him to bed after I finished eating, and carefully change him into pajamas.  _ He’d whine when I’d leave to change as well, but a simple kiss on the lips would pacify him long enough to change and get into bed. _ Then he’d curl into my side, hands clutching my sides and head resting on my chest, and fall asleep.  _ I’d watch him slowly fall asleep, his eyes tiredly opening and closing and lips falling into a soft pout as he’d nuzzle more into me _ .

And then the routine would start over again, the same yet different every single day.

Except for now.

I sleep alone in my office, knowing that if I wake up beside Taehyung I’ll immediately fall to my knees again.  _ Just one look and I know I won’t be able to resist him _ . I eat breakfast before anyone else wakes up, only having coffee and toast as it’s all I can stomach nowadays.  _ Just thinking of eating while Taehyung is hurt makes me want to vomit. _ I work in my office all day, reviewing all of the information that’s been collected about Taehyung and his group before our meeting.  _ If I want to know everything about the enemy, I need to know everything about the target first. _ It was a lot of information to go through and take note of everything that seemed important (and things that weren’t, in smaller, more compact bullet points), and I still need to do one more thing before studying the enemy.

_ I need to talk with each individual member of the Rose. I need to learn about them on a more professional level. _ I skip lunch, most of the time because I’m too invested in work to notice the time, but also because working is more important than eating at the moment.  _ And besides, I still can’t eat. Even if work is my priority right now, Taehyung will always take up the majority of my thoughts. _ I eat dinner long after everyone is asleep, even Taehyung who’s recently started staying up baking.  _ He always leaves a plate of chocolate chip cookies in the back of the top cupboard, and I know they’re for me so I make sure to eat them all, even if my conscience tells me I shouldn’t eat at all. _

And at night, before I’d go to bed again in my office, I’d make a trip down the stairs and across the hall, to my own room.  _ Taehyung would be asleep on top of the blankets, hands tightly clutching onto one of my pillows and his Kookie. _ My heart would both race and break at the sight, knowing that the younger had been waiting for me and fallen asleep in doing so.  _ I’d sit by his side for a while, running my hand through his hair until my hand burned, my mind telling me I had no business being so soft with the other when I’m the one hurting him. _ And so I’d leave, my lips burning after I’d kiss his forehead, and hand clutching tightly to my Luci.

_ And the cycle would repeat until the day Taehyung stopped sleeping in my room. _

And yet I still ignored the pain in my chest.

_ I’m doing this for him. So he can be safe. So one day, I can tell him I love him without fear of him being taken from me. _

And I will. I will tell him that.

With newfound conviction, I wait until there’s a knock on my door and call for the person to enter. I look at Namjoon with determined eyes, ready to have him tell me every last secret he holds until I have what I need.

_ Let’s get this over with so I can make my Taehyung smile again. _

\---

The scent lured me.

_ I swear it was the scent and not the hope of finding Taehyung. _

It was mid-afternoon when I smelt it, the warm and comforting scent spreading far and wide throughout the manor. I tried to ignore it at first, I needed to focus. I just got a list from Namjoon of all of his group's biggest enemies, ranked from the most problematic to the least, and so far I’ve been doing intensive research on each of them, starting from the bottom and going up. It’s been taking time, lots of it, but without Taehyung anymore all I’ve got is time.  _ It’s like old times again. All alone with nothing but time. _ Time that is now being used to go downstairs and find the source of the scent.

The scent belongs to bread.

It lines the countertops, the tables, the shelves. Just loaves upon loaves upon loaves of bread, warm and fluffy and fresh. The light to the oven is the only light on, causing the kitchen to be a bit dimmer than its surrounding rooms and hallways. I slowly step into the kitchen, taking slow and quiet footsteps, trying not to disturb the strangely ambient atmosphere.  _ Or rather trying to not yet make my presence known. _ He was just a small ball of black fabric, curled into himself and leaning against the counter on the floor. The only part of his body that can actually be seen are his eyes, the dull orbs staring intently at the oven.

“Taehyung?” I call out, and even the name feels like fire on my tongue.  _ His name is too beautiful, too pure, too divine to be dirtied by my lips. _

He doesn’t answer me, he doesn’t even blink. He just sits and continues to stare at the oven. I slowly crouch down next to him, my hands itching to grab out to him, to hold him, to run my fingers through his hair, to tickle him until his smile comes back.

“Taehyung? What are you doing?” I softly ask.

“Watching bread rise.” His voice is a quiet murmur, so quiet I can hardly hear his words, and for a moment I question if I only imagined his reply.

“Why?”

“Why not?”

I let out a soft breath, frowning slightly at the younger’s side profile.

“Taehyung, are you okay?” I question.

_ Of course he’s not, look at how coldy you’re treating him. _

“I’m fine, Jeongguk. Just watching bread rise. Don’t you have work to attend to?” His words leave a sting across my heart, and yet still Taehyung doesn’t look at me.

I don’t answer his question, not knowing how to answer because  _ yes I still have work to do but I don’t want to leave him _ .

“Why are you still here?” His voice was slightly louder this time, and hoarse as though he had just cried.

“Do you want me to leave?”

The sound he lets out is a mix of a scoff and a sigh, and his eyes softly shut as he presses his lips tightly together.

“Don’t ask me that.  _ Stop _ asking me that.” He pleas, his voice even more raw and strained.

“Asking you what?”

“Aking me what  _ I  _ want.  _ Giving _ me what I want. Think about yourself. What do  _ you _ want, Jeongguk?”

When he finally looks at me there’s a heaviness I’ve never felt before in my chest. His eyes are bloodshot, and already I can see tears pooling in his dull eyes. His nose is a bright red, and his lips are bloodied from excessive biting. Even his hair has lost its usual brightness, the long strands tucked messily into his hood.  _ Why does he still look so pretty even when he’s sad? _

“What I want.....I can’t have.” I tell him.

He scoffs lightly, more of his hair falling in front of his face as he shakes his head.

“Are you sure that you can’t have it? Or are you too scared to take it?” He questions, a sudden sharpness to his voice.

I gulp softly, not knowing how to answer this question either.

“I’m not scared.”

“You can’t lie to me, Yeoubi.” Taehyung snaps. He stands up and I stand with him, staring as the smaller gives me a glare and his lower lip slightly wobbles. “Out of all of the things you could ever do to me, you can  _ never _ lie to me.”

A small  _ ring _ keeps me from responding, thankfully. Even though I want to deny it, a small part of me knows that it’s true.  _ I can never lie to him _ . Taehyung takes a small breath, closing his eyes for a moment before turning around and facing the stove.

“You should probably go back to your work now, since you’re so busy nowadays. Try to take a break soon because I’ve got more work to give you soon.” He says tiredly, pulling on oven mitts.

Knowing that the conversation is now over, I let out a quiet sigh and turn around, heading out of the kitchen even though everything in me screams to turn back around and hug Taehyung and never let him go. But I don’t. I just keep walking until Taehyung’s voice reaches me one last time.

“Yeoubi, not everything you want will always be there when you finally decide to take it, so I suggest you grab whatever it is you want before it’s gone.”

I leave with that in mind, my brain repeating the words over and over.  _ He’s telling me to grab onto him before it’s too late. It’s not too late. I can still have him. We can still be happy. _ But will he be safe? Is there a guarantee that I can always protect him, and that he can protect himself? If something were to happen to him because of me, would he forgive me? Better yet-

Would I forgive myself?

“Hey, Jeon, have you seen Taehyung?” A sharp voice calls out in front of me.

I look up from the ground, eyes locking onto Yoongi and Hoseok. Yoongi outright glares at me, Hoseok avoids eye contact.  _ I guess they both hate me for hurting Taehyung. I deserve it. _

“He’s in the kitchen, baking bread.” I answer quietly.

Yoongi raises an eyebrow and Hoseok’s eyes widen.

“Bread?” They both repeat in unison.

“Yes, bread. Why?” I question.

Neither of them answer, just swear quietly under their breaths and rush in the direction I just came from. I watch after them for a moment before continuing back on my way to my office.  _ I wonder what’s wrong with him baking bread. _


	36. 34

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> All is fair in love and war

_ Jeongguk _

The room is silent except for the soft, almost inaudible sound of pen on paper as I write. A light breeze flows in through the open window, the room lit by the gentle, orange glow of my table lamp and the moonlight cascading in. It isn’t too late in the evening, the sun having set not so long ago. Papers lay in small bundles next to me, each packet separated for different members of the Rose and their enemies. It feels strange to finally put my pen down, the ache in my hand long forgotten after hours upon hours of writing.

I stare at the document in front of me, a schedule specialized specifically for one person to complete. The weight on my chest is slightly lessened as I place it on top of the rest of the schedules, each written for a specific person to carry out. I pick up the phone on the edge of my desk and dial a number, only waiting shortly for an answer.

“Yes sir?” The other person asks.

“Come to my office, and bring the rest of your unit. I have a new mission for you all.” I respond.

“On it. We’ll be there shortly.”

The call ends after that, and I lean back in my seat with a tired sigh, eyes drifting over to the window. Subconsciously, my hand slowly rises up to grasp the warm silver beneath my hoodie. I haven’t taken off the choker Taehyung gave me since he put it on me, it reminds me of the reason why I’m doing this.  _ I’m doing this for Taehyung. For us. So he can be safe, and happy. So  _ we _ can be safe and happy. _ But most importantly, it reminds me that no matter what, Taehyung and I will always be connected. We are two halves of a whole, different sides of the same coin.  _ He will always be mine as I will always be his. _ I lose track of time, mindlessly staring out of the window until a knock at my door brings me from my reverie.

“Come in.” I call out, dropping my hand onto my lap.

In walks Jackson and the rest of Got7, all of them in either comfortable clothes or pajamas.

“So- what is it this time?” Jackson asks, taking a seat across from me.

“A long-term recon mission. I’ve already made individual schedules for you all and outlined notes for you to fill out each night. You’ll be working in pairs, each pair will be taking on a different group or individual. Since there’s an odd number of you, though, one of you will be working with me. I’ve already arranged for JB to work with me. The rest of the pairings are Jackson and Mark, Jinyoung and Youngjae, and Bambam and Yugyeom.” I explain, pausing to pass out each of their schedules. “Those are the groups you’ll be getting information on. Do not, under any circumstances, make any kind of contact with them as of yet. You’re dismissed.”

With quiet murmurs of “yes sir” and other strange mumbles, the group slowly leaves with their eyes directed at the files I just handed them. All except for JB, who takes Jackson’s seat after the latter leaves, still looking at his own schedule.

“Is something wrong?” I ask the male.

“I’ve heard of this guy before.” He replies, eyebrows slightly scrunched up as he continues to read.

“You have?”

He nods and closes the file, looking up at me with a puzzled face.

“Taehyung mentioned him a few times before. Once when I was asking him about his scars, and a few other times when he was asleep.” JB explains.

I raise an eyebrow at the last part. “When he was asleep?”

He pauses for a moment, then seems to realize what he just said and is quick to explain himself.

“Yeah, recently he’s been overworking himself so me and the other guys kind of steal him away and make him sleep, and sometimes he’ll have bad dreams, I’m guessing, and talk in his sleep. Usually it’s about random things, most of the time I can’t understand what he’s saying, but sometimes he’ll clutch his chest and whisper this name. It’s strange, though, because when he wakes up he doesn’t even remember that he had a dream.”

I slowly nod, taking the information in.  _ He dreams about that night often, the night he was almost killed. _

“Sir, I have a question.” JB says.

“Go ahead.”

“This man- these  _ groups _ \- they’re none of our enemies, are they?”

“They are now.”

“Another question, sir.” I motion for him to ask. “These are the groups that Taehyung and his group came to us for protection against, aren’t they?”

I nod.

“If that’s the case, then, sir, why aren’t we getting them to help us with this and tell us what they know?”

“I want a fresh look on the situations first, to see things from an outside perspective before diving in. We’ll bring in the Rose after that.”

“Permission to speak out of line, sir?”

I pause, wondering just what it is JB wants to say as he never usually asks to say something considered not relative to the job.

“Permission granted.” I tell him.

“Is this why you’ve been ignoring Taehyung all this time?”

His question makes me freeze, and I gulp slightly. “I’m not.”

“Bullshit, Jeon. We all know you are, even Taehyung. Hell- he was the first to notice it, and he has since the first day you started ignoring him. You underestimate him too much.”

“I do  _ not _ -”

“You  _ do _ . You underestimate how dangerous he can be when angered. You underestimate the things he notices on a daily basis. You underestimate the amount of work or strain he can deal with in this job. And you underestimate how much he needs you, and vice versa.”

JB has stood up by now, an angry look on his face and a glare in his eyes. I’m slightly shocked at his actions, not knowing the last time I’ve seen him this upset before. The other glares at me for a while longer before calming himself down and returning to his impassive state.

“He doesn’t need much, Jeongguk. Just show him you still care, that’s all he wants.” He states, picking up his file and leaving right after.

The room is silent after JB leaves, the suffocating kind. I let out a deep sigh after a while, closing my eyes and burying my face in my hands. I stay in that position for a while, trying to gather my thoughts when a quiet knock fills the previously quiet room. The person waits for no answer as a moment after the last knock the door is being opened.

“I’m bu-” I begin.

“Busy? Yeah, I guessed, but I’m here for business.”

The familiar voice causes my breath to catch in my throat for a moment, not expecting for them to be here so late.

“Taehyung.” I say quietly, mostly to myself, as I look up.

The younger walks into the room, footsteps silent as he more or less glides across the floor. A big, fluffy brown sweater covers his small frame, the top tucked neatly into a pair of beige, high waisted tartan pants. A black belt is looped through the pants, cinching his already small waist, and thin, silver rings decorate his fingers. A pair of circular glasses sit on his face, slightly hidden by his extremely fluffy hair. And around his neck, which takes my attention almost immediately, is his silver lock choker. He carries a large stack of files and binders in his arms, organized so that they’re perfectly stacked on top of one another.

“That’s a lot…” I say quietly, watching as the younger sets the stack on my desk.

“Yeah, well, I was going to wait until you’ve had a break to slowly bring this in, but it didn’t happen and we’re now on a bit of a time crunch.” Taehyung tells me, speaking a little quickly.

“Okay, what’ve you got?”

“I went through all of the business partners Joon got info on from the last of the Triumvirate and made a list of who would join us and who wouldn’t. The ones that aren’t joining us and are remaining neutral are in this file,” he hands me a thin, manila folder, “I’ve already gone and done background searches on everyone important. They’re all separated into their respective groups and alphabetically ordered, all the information you need on them is there. These are the groups who aren’t joining us and are going against you,” he sets two binders in front of me, “They’re organized from most to least likely to cause an issue, I also did complete background searches on them and added important notes where I saw fit, and it’s alphabetically ordered as well.”

He pauses to hand me three more binders. “And this is everyone who decided to join you. I’ve ordered them based on who would be the most beneficial and who we should see first. Again, complete background searches done, and don’t forget to check the last page of each group to see the important notes. The first seven groups you’ve already got meetings with starting tomorrow at nineteen hundred hours. I’ve already written down who you’ll be taking to each meeting and why as well as an outline of how everything should go and how the other party should react. Along with that is a blueprint of where you’ll be meeting and exit strategies should anything go wrong.”

He hands me one last file. “And this is more or less a follow up of how the last mission went and how everyone is taking it. The public is definitely scared now and police are on our case even more than before. Namjoon has already taken precautions for this, so there isn’t much to worry about at the moment, but we’ll make sure to keep an eye on things just in case.”

I stare at one of the binders he’s just given me, the one that has the information about tomorrow’s meeting and yet again amazed at how amazing of a worker he is.

“How the hell did you get all of this done so quickly?” I ask, knowing that when he and I were still with each other almost 24/7 he wasn’t working long enough to get all of  _ this _ done by today.

“I’ve had a lot of time on my hands recently, thought I’d do something worthwhile with it.”

I slowly look up at him and see his now slightly dimmed eyes already trained on me.

“Tell me that you’ve been sleeping at night and not working on this.” I softly demand.

“I have.” He answers a little too quickly.

I narrow my eyes at him, yet the younger remains perfectly calm.

“If I cannot lie to you, then you cannot lie to me, Taehyung.” I tell him.

And then he smiles.

The corners of his lips gently rise, and an almost fond look fills his eyes.

“I suppose that is one thing we do not have in common, Yeoubi. You cannot lie to me at all, but for me - if it meant your peace of mind or your safety - I would lie to you in a heartbeat.” He confesses.

_ He would willingly lie to me? _

There’s a different kind of pain in my heart at his words. It’s not a stab or an ache.  _ It feels like my heart is being pulled from my chest. _

“That is not fair, Taehyung.” I say breathlessly, confused at the way my throat begins to tighten.

But Taehyung just smiles and leans across the desk, steadying himself by placing one hand on the desk. Meanwhile his other hand gently cups my face, the contact both burning me and comforting me. I subconsciously close my eyes when he leans in, and when he kisses my forehead I feel my throat open again. When his lips gently land on my eyelids I feel the pain in my chest start to fade away. And when he steals a kiss from my lips, the pain in my chest is completely gone. I open my eyes again, staring into Taehyung’s eyes. And, for a moment, I think I see  _ my _ Taehyung in his deep green eyes.

“All is fair in love and war.” He whispers against my lips.

And then he pulls away, and I’m left once again craving his presence, his warmth,  _ his love _ .

“Make sure you read through the notes carefully, Yeoubi. If you have any questions go to Namjoon.” Taehyung says as he begins to leave.

“And if I want to ask you?” I call out.

He doesn’t stop walking as he answers. “I will not be here often for the next few days, but I will leave my pager with you in case of emergencies.”

“Where are you going?”

He opens the door. “Following up on some leads for my solo mission. I’ll be gone most nights, and stop by sparsely during the day. I’ve already let the others know of this and they’ve agreed to keep me filled in on what happens here while I’m out and let me know if there are any serious situations that need my attention.”

“When will you be back?”

He stops and looks back at me, a small, reassuring smile on his face. “I will be back in time for the last two meetings, Yeoubi.” He pauses and glances at the documents covering my desk, then back at me. “And take a break for the night, you’re going to need it.” He sends me one last smile before heading out. “Try not to miss me too much, my Yeoubi.”

With a deafening  _ click _ the door shuts, and Taehyung leaves me alone with my heart in his hands.

“I miss you everyday.” I say quietly, knowing that the younger cannot hear me.


	37. 35

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Luci misses Kookie.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry again for the chapter mix ups, here's the proper chapter that should've been posted today. I hope you enjoy it!

Falling. Falling. Falling. He was falling. He was falling and he couldn’t stop. He was plunging into the void, and nothing could stop him.  _ Nothing would stop him _ . Afterall, nothing was there, there was nothing. He was nothing.  _ He is nothing _ . There was no wind rushing past his body as he fell, but he could feel the coldness biting at his skin. It nipped at his cheeks and turned them red, it pulled and grabbed at his arms and legs and he could feel the color draining from his body but  _ how could something that is not there affect him? _ There was no fear in his heart as he fell, but he could feel the pain in his chest. He could feel the weight on his chest, the chains tightening around his bleeding heart until it slowed,

And slowed,

And slowed.

He could feel the way his lungs would strain, trying oh so desperately to expand, to contract, to take in air,  _ to breathe _ . But they wouldn’t, they couldn’t. They thrashed around in his chest, threatening to break free from their cage, but they never moved. It was, perhaps, because of the grip around his throat. That bruising grip which turned his pretty honey skin into a mess of deep purples and sad blues. They turned his neck into a painting full of pain and sorrow, but it was beautiful. He was beautiful.

But he was nothing.

He wanted to be something. He wanted to be anything. He wanted everything, but everything didn’t want him.

Only nothing did.

And so he was falling, falling, falling, into the cold, dark arms of nothing. He was frozen in time, locked inside of himself, forced to do nothing when all he wanted was to do  _ something _ . He wanted to scream, shout, howl. He wanted to cry, to sob, to be sad. He wanted to be angry, he wanted to be furious. The emotions; they bubbled inside of him, they churned and grew and multiplied. They spread throughout his body, they invaded his bloodstream and his senses. He was a storm, a tornado, a hurricane.  _ He was everything no one could handle. _ He was a natural disaster waiting to crash down onto earth. He was ready to destroy everything in his path, to leave nothing but chaos and anguish behind him.

He was ready to explode. He was ready to be angry until even the heavens shook at his rage. He was ready to cry until the earth flooded once more. He was ready to scream until his throat was raw and even the devil himself cowered at the sound of his battle cry.

He was falling.

He was screaming.

But he did not move.

And no sound left his lips.

He stood.

And he stared.

His body was shrouded in darkness, he used the shadows for cover. And who were the shadows to deny the Prince of Darkness himself? They welcomed him in their nothingness, they hid him away from prying eyes. In the dark he was safe, he was him, him was he, they were one. And they were standing, they were staring, they were watching. Yes, they were in the dark, but his eyes were bright. They were green flames in the night, they were entire super novas -  _ galaxies _ , even. But their brightness was nowhere near as comforting nor inviting as they used to be. No, not anymore, not for a long time.

Instead it was as if someone had placed the fires of hell into his eyes. The only thing they held was a burning lust for chaos, for destruction,  _ for retribution _ . Because Lord knows he fell. He fell straight from the heavens and came crashing onto earth.  _ He is no longer guided by the light of God, instead he sees the world through the flames of Hell. _ His eyes are suns - beautiful to look at, but he’ll burn you if you get too close.  _ And he’s not afraid to watch you burn. _

His eyes were the only part of him that showed emotion, the rest of his being draped in dark clothing and hidden away from the rest of the world. He was meticulously put together, not a strand of hair nor a piece of fabric out of place. His hair was neatly combed backwards, and the archer hood of his jacket was carefully placed on top. The black face mask he wears covers his nose and the bottom half of his face, the fabric gently hiding away his neck as it disappears beneath his jacket. The jacket itself is made of black coloured leather and wraps around his toned body like a second skin, the zipper hidden beneath a buttoned flap.

A black harness wraps around his chest and again at his stomach, the straps tying a black bag to his back. His pants are black as well, cargo pants that clung loosely to his legs and tucked themselves neatly into his black boots. A utility belt wraps around his small waist, and straps connect it to harnesses on his thighs. Attached to his belt are several black pouches, each containing small tools he will need throughout the night. His hands are covered by black, leather gloves, the fabric completely covering his hands and going up his arms, stopping at his forearms.

The faintest of breezes runs past his frame, causing the leaves around him to gently shiver. However, he makes no movement at all, he doesn’t even blink as the cool air softly caresses his face. He stares intently at the house in front of him, the structure being the last on the street. It was a quaint little house, with fading yellow paint and white accents. There were no plants or bushes in front of or around the house, it was completely bare. There were no decorations, nothing to liven it up - only the fading yellow and white paint and the chipped front door. He watches from the shadows as, at long last, the last light inside the house - from the second floor window, to the right - finally goes out. He doesn’t move, though, not for a while longer. Instead, he merely waits,

And waits,

And waits.

And when he thinks he’s waited long enough, he finally steps from the shadows. It was like something out of a nightmare, a horror movie. He didn’t merely  _ step _ out of the shadows, he dragged them with him on his way out. It was as if the shadows themselves had bled until his form was created, stepping through the veil of darkness as it tried so desperately to hold onto their Prince. If anyone were to see him as he emerged, they surely would have thought him as a demon - although they weren’t too far from the mark.

And when he walks, oh you’d never think his feet were actually touching the ground. No, he glides across the pavement, hovering above the concrete, and moving swiftly yet silently. He makes his way up the stone stairs and onto the small landing in front of the door. His body is void of hesitance as he reaches into one of the pouches on his waist and pulls out two long, silver objects. He carefully slips them into the lock on the door, moving them in a way as though he’d done it a thousand times before - which he had, of course. A tiny  _ click _ sound softly sings through the night, letting him know that he’s got what he wanted, and with a gentle push the door opens.

He slips inside the house, the shadows in here welcoming him as well - consuming the moonlight behind him as he shuts the door, placing his lock picks back into their respective places. The house is completely silent inside and, upon further inspection as well, bare. There are no pictures on the walls, nothing to identify who lives here, at least, there was no decor, and barely any furniture. The only thing that filled the lonesome living room was a single sofa, moth eaten and stained, a wooden table that looked as though it would fall over at any given moment, and a small box television. Green eyes take their time, slowly studying the room and its contents.

He moves his hand to one of the pockets on his pants and pulls out a small, black notepad with a pen clipped to it. He opens it to a blank page and immediately begins taking notes of everything he sees as he travels through the house. The kitchen is disastrous once he enters, every surface and parts of the floor covered in alcohol, mail, and takeout bags and cartons. The sink is full of unwashed dishes, and more pile high next to it. The smell of rotting food and stale alcohol fills the air, but he doesn’t react to the mess. He just begins taking notes again, his usually neat, cursive handwriting slightly messy as he moves quickly.

There wasn’t much else to the first floor, so he makes his way upstairs - the usually creaky stairs now silent under him, as if they were afraid of what would happen should they make a sound. Clothes were messily strewn about the small, narrow hallway - some of it belonging to a man and some a woman, most of them being the latter’s. He carefully steps around the clothing, not touching a single piece of fabric despite still looking down at his notepad and writing. Though his writing soon comes to a stop as he steps in front of a door. He opens it and slips inside, not caring about being caught because he knows he won’t.  _ How can you catch someone you can’t even see? _

When he steps inside, the stench of sex and more alcohol reaches his nose, and he mentally cringes because of it. The moment is short lived, however, and he quickly slips back into his work persona. There are only two things inside of the room; a bed and a nightstand. Most things lay about the floor, mostly shoes and clothes, but he does catch sight of a few bottles of perfume and maybe even a bit of makeup. Two naked bodies lay in the bed, completely passed out and covered by a thin sheet he supposes is supposed to be a blanket.

He quietly steps closer to the bed. Closer, closer, closer, until he’s standing right above the man. He stares at the man’s face for a while, easily distinguishing his features in the dark. Slowly, almost robotically, he tilts his head to the side, seemingly intrigued. As if sensing the evil presence above him, the naked man begins to tremble in his sleep, his eyebrows scrunching together and lips pressing into a deep frown. Yet he does not wake, he only remains trapped inside of his own living hell, and the demon above him can’t help but to smirk beneath his mask.  _ Oh how he was going to adore torturing him _ .

He pulls his notepad out once more, eagerly jotting down notes as he exits the room. He swiftly continues his tour of the house, and once he’s done - he leaves. Not before making sure to lock the door behind him, of course. He could tell the sun was going to rise soon, and rather than pulling yet another all nighter, he decided it would be best to go back to the estate. He needed a shower desperately, and knew if he went longer than two days without food it surely wouldn’t be the starvation that killed him, but something else. Or rather,  _ someone _ else. So he makes his way a few blocks over, into the narrow alleyway that hardly anyone ever uses, and pulls his motorcycle from the shadows.

He swings one leg over the seat, comfortably seating himself before starting the machine up. It lets out a beautiful roar as it comes to life, making him inwardly smile, and soon he begins the long drive back to the estate. By the time he finally makes it to the gates, the sun is already beginning to peak over the horizon. He lets out a tired sigh as he goes through a security check (which mostly included him temporarily pulling down his mask and the guards immediately letting him in), and brings his motorcycle to the main garage. He sluggishly makes his way to the front door, picking the lock open as he didn’t bring his key with him (if anything were to happen to him, he’d be damned if he gave his enemies a key to the place where his loved ones lived).

There was an ache in his chest once the door clicked shut. No longer was there a mission on his mind to keep his thoughts at bay. No longer was there space between him and the other male, the one who had so selfishly taken his heart and refused to give it back - watching sadistically from afar as he slowly broke down.  _ No, that’s not right. It’s not like that. Stop poisoning my thoughts. _ He slips the hood off of his head, running one hand through his golden locks while the other tugs his mask back down. Small clicking sounds are heard as he unbuttons the flap on his jacket and pulls the zipper down, revealing the sheer black mesh top underneath. He leans his back against the door, staring numbly in front of him.

He remembers the time when this foyer used to be full of light and happiness, when he’d run around wearing a flower crown and playing with a paper airplane. He remembers when  _ he _ came, swooping him into his arms and tickling him until he couldn’t breathe. He thought he saw adoration in his eyes back then, but the demons in his head were slowly changing his memories, turning what was once happy into something much sadder and darker. The foyer that was once full of sunshine is now clouded by shadows, and the warmth that once filled the halls dwindled to an icy temperature.  _ This manor doesn’t feel like home anymore. _

“Taehyung.” He hated the way his legs felt weak just by the other saying his name.

Slowly, his eyes focus onto the man in front of him, so close yet so far. He looked as though he had either just woken up, or was just about to fall asleep, Taehyung wasn’t sure which as either was a considerable choice for the male. He wore a simple loose white t-shirt and a pair of grey sweatpants, and never had Taehyung had to try so hard to tear his eyes away from a tattoo. His hands were hidden away in the pockets of his sweats and the closer Taehyung looked, which he tried desperately not too, but he couldn’t  _ help _ but notice these things, he could see the growing eye bags on the other’s face. He tried to keep calm, but he couldn’t stop the pain in his chest when he saw the piece of jewelry around his pale neck.

_ He still wore their choker. _

Taehyung was so caught up in his mind that he didn’t completely register it when the other started walking up to him, he just remained against the door with his unfocused eyes staring at nothing.

“You’re finally back.” The man says quietly, his hands itching to reach out to hold the blonde but making no moves to do so. Oh how much he missed the other while he was gone, staying up late into the hours of the night as he waited for him. He was grateful that Taehyung had outlined everything that needed to be done in the next few days, because his mind was in no shape to focus and do it himself. If he thought it was difficult to be away from the blonde while he was home, it was nothing compared to what he felt when he was gone, unable to contact him unless it was for an emergency.

Not trusting himself to speak, Taehyung merely nods, watching the other with wary eyes. Noticing that the other has no intention of speaking, or rather can’t speak at the moment, the other reaches out and gently grabs him by the waist, noting the way the blonde’s eyes grow hazy before tiredly refocusing.

“Have you eaten?” He asks gently, wanting to make sure Taehyung’s stomach is full before sending him off to bed.

However, just when Taehyung is about to nod, the other speaks up.

“Actually, let me rephrase that. When’s the last time you ate?”

Taehyung’s eyes slowly drop from the other’s, now staring at the silver key around his neck.

“Two days ago.” His voice was barely a whisper, as if he had no energy left to speak. That, or he had gone too long without speaking he’d forgotten how to do it properly.

“ _ Taehyung _ .” The other quietly hisses.

Taehyung only shrugs, providing no explanation for his actions and showing no interest in doing so if the other asked. And so he doesn’t. He doesn’t ask Taehyung why he didn’t eat anything the past two days. Instead he let out a soft sigh and ran a pale hand through his inked coloured hair before guiding the other to the kitchen. He makes the blonde take a seat at the island, and he can feel his gaze on him the entire time he moves about. The first thing he does is place two slices of bread in the toaster, pushing down the little lever that would cause the bread to sink inside of the metal container to be toasted.

Next he grabs a tea cup from the cupboard, filling it nearly to the top with water before placing it in the microwave and allowing it to heat up. In the meantime, he goes to the fridge, his head disappearing inside for a moment before he straightens his back once more. In his hand he holds a carton of fresh strawberries, the rosy red fruits appearing to Taehyung as a pop of color in his black and white vision. He wasn’t aware of the small smile on his face, the tiniest upturn of his lips, as he watched the other place strawberries in a bowl after placing a tea bag in the now hot water and leaving it to steep.

“Jeongguk......what are you doing?” The blonde softly asks, the last of the strength in his body slowly draining. He had spent over sixty hours awake and over forty-eight having not eaten anything at all, only occasionally drinking water when he had the time. His body was exhausted, it begged him to lie down, to rest, to sleep. But he knew he couldn’t fall asleep, not now, he wasn’t ready to face the demons he’d see once he closed his eyes.  _ Better yet, he wasn’t ready to face them alone. _

The black haired man turns around once he hears the other say his name, and his features slowly exhibit a look of confusion at his question. “I’m making you something to eat.” He simply answers before returning to his task.

“Why?”

“Because you need to eat before going to bed, and I know you’re too tired to make anything yourself.”

_ Taehyung hated how his heart fluttered at the other’s answer. _

After another minute or two of silence, Jeongguk sets the plate of toast (with an orange marmalade spread over top) and the bowl of strawberries in front of Taehyung. He turns around one last time to pick up the younger’s tea as well as his own mug of coffee and slides the glass cup to Taehyung. The blonde quietly murmurs a thank you as he picks up the tea, gently blowing on it before taking a sip. He could tell Jeongguk was staring at him the whole time, making him feel antsy. There was something different about his stare this time, and meeting his gaze made him feel anxious but at the same time he couldn’t look away.

There was a strange, puzzling kind of invasiveness to it that made him feel vulnerable - and he wasn’t sure if it was a good or bad thing. All he knew was that when Jeongguk’s eyes were on him he felt the odd compulsion to appease the man. He wanted to be closer to him, he wanted to pick his brain and body apart to learn everything about him, he wanted to know what motivated him and what memories kept him up at night, he wanted to know what would make him tick and what would calm him down. And the raw emotions he felt - the emotions that bubble up and multiplied as a cause of the recent events - they all forced their way up his throat and to the tip of his tongue and before he knew it he had already spoken.

“Luci misses his Kookie.” It was the loudest he had spoken in days, and it wasn’t his usual deep, honey-like tone. No, this voice was breathless. It was rough, it was raspy, it was  _ pained _ . “Luci wants his Kookie by his side again.”

Jeongguk hated the anguish in the other’s voice and the distress that plagued his usually happy features. He wanted to swoop his little baby (yes,  _ his _ baby) into his arms and hug him so tight he couldn’t move and kiss him until he was breathless. He wanted to shower his angel in love and affection, to pamper him until he was spoiled.  _ But he couldn’t risk Taehyung’s life in the process, not when he could get rid of the problem before it arised. _ Taehyung can tell that the smile Jeongguk is forced, carrying as much misery as his own voice, and he can see the longing in his dark eyes as he stares at him.

“Kookie misses his Luci more than Luci will ever know.” He softly tells Taehyung. “Kookie wants Luci to know that though he can’t always physically be by Luci’s side, Kookie will always be there for Luci whenever he needs him.”

But Taehyung shakes his head, harshly biting his lower lip.  _ He’s not going to cry again, he’s already cried too much. He’s not a baby anymore. _

“Luci needs his Kookie  _ now _ .” He pleads, becoming more desperate by the second. “Luci can’t do this alone.”

“Luci isn’t alone, Luci is never alone. Luci has his hyungs and friends by his side. Luci still has his Kookie.”

Jeongguk sets his coffee down and reaches out to take Taehyung’s hand in his. They both feel the electricity shooting up their arms at the contact. It was a shock of life, for as soon as their hands intertwined they felt a surge of energy rush through them and their aching hearts were gently soothed.

“Is Kookie going to give Luci up?” Taehyung’s voice was small, it was vulnerable, and for a moment, Jeongguk thought he saw Taehyung - the  _ true _ Taehyung behind his childish and maniacal facade.

A broken child who had to grow up much too soon.

“Kookie will  _ never _ give Luci up. He promised Luci he’d always be there for him, he intends to keep that promise.” Jeongguk softly reassures the younger, his voice light but determined.

He’s never going to let go of Taehyung. He can’t.  _ How can you let go of the very reason why your heart beats? _

“Does Kookie love Luci?”

_ Yes. _

But before Jeongguk can answer, the pair is interrupted by the sound of footsteps nearing the kitchen. Taehyung softly sniffles and uses his free hand to wipe his teary eyes. Jeongguk watches him with a sad kind of fondness in his eyes as the blonde plucks a strawberry from the bowl and pops one into his mouth, lightly pouting as he does so. Both of their heads perk up once someone enters the kitchen, the both of them giving the male questioning looks. The man, too, looks at the pair curiously. It’s been a while since he’s seen the two in the same room at the same time, let alone actually conversing, and much less  _ holding hands _ . But he makes no comments on it, just smiles to himself.

“Jeon, the others are ready and waiting for you.” He informs the black haired man.

Jeongguk nods slightly, pursing his lips in a thin line.

“Thank you, Jin. Let the others know that I’ll be there in a few minutes.” He orders.

Jin nods, glancing at Taehyung before he leaves. Taehyung doesn’t meet his gaze, however. He stares intently at his and Jeongguk’s entangled hands between them, the other holding his hand so gently as if he were fragile glass. Jeongguk follows his line of sight, smiling softly at their hands as he draws random shapes into the other’s hand. Slowly, his smile turns into a frown and he lets out a small sigh.

“I have to go now.” He quietly says.

Jeongguk gently tugs his hand from Taehyung’s, but as soon as he lets go, Taehyung snaps from his daze and grabs back onto Jeongguk’s hand. He looks at the other with wide, glassy eyes, silently begging him to not leave. Jeongguk stands up, still holding onto Taehyung’s hand as he walks in front of him. He carefully disconnects their hands, making sure the other can tell that he’s not going to leave, and cups his face. He lightly places his lips on Taehyung’s forehead before resting their foreheads against each other, looking directly into Taehyung’s eyes.

“Kookie has never, and will never care for someone as much as he cares for his Luci. Kookie is Luci’s, and Luci is Kookie’s, until the end of time.” He promises.

He leaves one last lingering kiss on Taehyung’s brow before leaving, ignoring the voice in his head telling him to go back. Taehyung watches as the older leaves, all of the warmth and color in the room seeping away with every step he takes. Jeongguk leaves with Taehyung’s heart in his hands.

And then Taehyung was falling again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Did the 3rd pov surprise you? It's been a while since I've used this pov, hope you're ready to see more of it in the future.


	38. 36

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I can't shake these midnight thoughts when I'm alone;  
> Latching to my brain and never letting go.  
> So I'll start making friends with the noise in my head,  
> And all these midnight thoughts when I'm alone.

No one quite realizes how sleepless nights can affect you, or how overthinking slowly kills you. No one quite knows how it can turn your mind into thoughts you wish weren’t yours. Taehyung had lost count of how many nights he’s spent awake, wasting away precious hours standing on his balcony. His mind wasn’t his, at least, that’s what he’s decided. His mind was full of dark ambitions and evil intentions - he craved the things he wanted so desperately to give up.

The things he craved were not him. No, they were grey smoke and blazing flames. They were steel and iron and metal. They were leather and harnesses. They were shades of reds and blues and purples. They were shining tears and piercing screams. They were the king with broken wings and a realm of damnation to rule. But he- he wasn’t that. He was warmth and sunshine. He was records and flowers and art. He was silk and lace. He was shades of pinks and greens and whites. He was bright smiles and laughter. He was the favorite son with the prettiest wings and a mind full of freedom.

_ But they were the same. _

They were golden ashes lighting up the night, but would set you alight if you got too close. They were warriors, royalty, and gods. They were leather and silk, harnesses and lace. They were shades of pinks and reds, blues and greens, purples and whites. They were angels who lost their halos but not their wings, they were the angels who were not fed love on a silver spoon and so learned to lick it off of knives instead.

_ They were one in the same but they always fought over who was in control. _

And Taehyung knew - he knew long before the battle begun - that he would lose this fight. But the thing is,

_ He didn’t want to win. _

He hated it when they won, he despised it more than anything in the world. Oh, but how much he craved the numbness they brought with them. He craved the emptiness, he craved the silence,  _ he craved to have no more thoughts and emotions _ . And he was weak when it came to them, because they knew just what he needed and what would make him feel better. The worst part about anything that’s self destructive is that it’s so intimate. You become so close with your addictions and illnesses that leaving them behind is like killing the part of yourself that taught you how to survive.

_ And all Taehyung knew was how to survive. _

So he slowly let himself be dragged away. He let go of his worries. He let go of the pain in his heart.  _ He let go because he had nothing to hold onto. _ And slowly he let himself be replaced by the demons. He let them take the burden off of his shoulders. He let them pretend to heal him when he knew they were just making him worse. But it was okay. He was okay.

But slowly, before he lets himself be completely taken away, he makes sure to leave behind a part of himself to come back to. It was a kind of reminder, a dim light somewhere overhead in the dark forest, something that would wake him from his slumber when he thinks he’s slept long enough. It was a painting. Well,  _ paintings _ . He couldn’t help but paint more than one. The images he saw in his head, they burned and begged to be seen. His hands itched and shook and trembled, aching to paint and paint until he could paint no more.

His canvases were an explosion of colours and emotions. The colours were dark, they weighed on your chest and were too haunting to look away from. But the emotions - the emotions were ecstatic, they were beautiful, they were loving.  _ They were beautiful nightmares. _ He had to get them out of his head, he couldn’t hold onto them anymore. They were the only thing keeping him from falling asleep, and all he wanted was to rest. So silently he paints, trapping the images that plague him on blank canvases before they can destroy him more.  _ Or rather, before they could be destroyed themselves, turned into something they aren’t in order to make him suffer more. _

The chilly evening breeze softly caresses his skin, his upper body completely exposed. The only thing protecting him from the increasingly cold temperature are the black sweatpants that hang loosely on his hips, the drawstrings barely done. His legs had gone numb long ago from standing for so long, but he hadn’t really noticed it. Even if he did, he probably wouldn’t have gone to sit down. He wouldn’t sit until he finished painting.  _ He had to finish them quickly, before they could be altered any further. _

It had been like that for days. If he wasn’t working on his solo mission (which he had just finished his recon for), or handling work for Jeongguk, he was painting. He seldom left his room unless it be for work or to go to the gym, he didn’t even go down for meals anymore. His hyungs left food for him on his dresser three times a day, only to come back later to find not even three bites eaten. Taehyung had shut himself away in his room and rarely spoke to anyone anymore. The most anyone had seen of him since he began going out for his mission was the one time Jin had caught him conversing with Jeon in the kitchen.

He has suspicions that whatever the pair talked about caused Taehyung’s abrupt seclusion, but with Taehyung not even acknowledging anyone’s presence and Jeongguk only speaking about work related topics, it was hard for him to really know. The only person in the manor who wasn’t concerned about the young Joker’s behaviour was Namjoon. Namjoon knew Taehyung like the back of his hand, he knew almost everything there was to know about him. And so he knew that Taehyung’s current “hibernation” isn’t what they should be worried about. It’s what happens  _ after _ he comes back to life.

The moon was full this night, shining oh so brightly onto Taehyung’s caramel skin. He appeared as a phantom, his body basked in the white glow of the moon. There was music quietly playing in the background, classical. It was slow and dark, and in a strange way, it was peaceful. It was a hauntingly serene scene to behold, even if no one was there to witness it. And then someone was knocking on his door. The knocks were soft, quiet, almost unheard over the music. But Taehyung heard it, yet he did not acknowledge it. He didn’t look at the door, he didn’t call for whoever was on the other side to come in, he just stood and continued to paint.

The door opened regardless of Taehyung’s silence and a dark figure enters the dimly lit space. A small light keeps the room lit, a soft, orange glow barely outlining the room’s contents. Onyx eyes carefully scan the room, eyes slightly narrowing at the untouched dinner on the dresser as a soft sigh escapes his lips. His eyes trail over to the open balcony and the young boy standing by the rail, busily painting away. He takes a moment to merely admire the blonde haired male, mentally cooing at his natural pout and the paint brush tucked behind his ear, purple paint dripping from its bristles and onto his shoulder and chest.

Taehyung was effortlessly beautiful, no matter what he was doing.

He silently steps further into the room and softly shuts the door behind him, making sure to carefully balance the tray in his hands as he does so. He makes his way onto the balcony where Taehyung stands, still not paying attention to him. He sets the tray on a nearby side table just behind Taehyung and lifts one of the glass cups from atop of it. After setting it on the small work table next to the blonde, he takes a seat behind him, leaning back comfortably in the chair as he reaches into the pocket of his sweats and takes out a pack of cigarettes and a lighter. The cigarette hangs loosely from his lips, puffs of smoke leaving his slightly parted lips every so often.

He watches the boy in front of him as he lazily smokes, patiently waiting for the other to pause for the night. His eyes slowly rake over his back, taking in the honey toned skin and pearly white scars for what seems to be the millionth time that week. It was their little routine, of sorts. He would come to the blonde’s room late at night, bringing with him a cup of coffee and a cup of tea for the pair to share as they spoke like they used to. However, unlike they used to, Taehyung wouldn’t speak. He’d only listen to the other as he would talk about random things, and responded through small gestures from time to time.

The dark haired male didn’t mind, he knew that the blonde could only do so much before he burned out, and he knew he needed a bit of a social and mental recharge. The fact that he even listened to him, and would use those small gestures to reply to him was more than enough for him. He’d do his best to make sure the boy was okay, or at least as close to it as he can be.  _ He just needed a little more time, then they’d be okay. _ He watches with soft eyes as Taehyung sets his paintbrushes down and picks up his tea, gently cradling it in his hands as he takes small sips.

Taehyung slowly turns around, eyes almost immediately landing on the man who sits behind him. He had to admit, he was elated to see the ink haired man again tonight, though he didn’t really show it. He thought that the other was going to continue ignoring him after their talk in the kitchen, but was pleasantly surprised a few nights later when Jeongguk came to his room with coffee and tea and they talked. Well, Jeongguk talked, Taehyung listened. He was scared to talk. He was scared that the thoughts he tried so hard to keep inside would come tumbling out.  _ He was scared the other would change his mind and leave him again. _

So he kept his mouth shut, listening carefully to every word Jeongguk spoke to him. He kept his distance, he kept a wall between them. If Jeongguk did decide to leave him again, he wasn’t going to let himself be the one who got hurt. But tonight was different. He didn’t know how or why, but it was different. For starters, it was different in the way Taehyung sat down on Jeongguk’s lap, straddling his muscular, sweat clad thighs instead of perching himself on the other chair across from him. Jeongguk was a bit shocked by the blonde’s actions, but regardless placed his free hand on his small waist, keeping him in place.

There was silence amongst them, the pair not doing anything other than staring into each other’s eyes. Taehyung felt that feeling again, looking into Jeongguk’s eyes. That invasive, vulnerable feeling that he couldn’t get rid of. Then again, he wasn’t quite sure if he wanted to get rid of it. Jeongguk, for once, listened to the little voice in the back of his head that told him to keep Taehyung close, to hold him tight and not let him go. He keeps one hand firmly around Taehyung’s waist, softly rubbing circles into the smooth skin, and the other he had planted on the younger’s thigh, gently gripping the thick flesh.

Jeongguk was the first to look away, his eyes wandering down to the boy’s tattoos. He inwardly smiles at the Gucci tattoo across his collarbones, now understanding how much he loves the brand compared to the first time he saw the tattoo. He admires the rose tattoo on his neck and the geometric pattern beneath it. But his favorite was, unashamedly, the king cobra tattoo on his side, surrounded by flowers as if to remind all those who see it that there lies danger behind every beauty.

He trails his gaze back up, stopping at Taehyung’s throat. Without thinking, he lifts his hand from around Taehyung’s waist to his neck, wrapping his hand around his throat and resting it there. He doesn’t choke the younger, he merely admires the sight of his hand around the other’s throat.

“Where is it?” He asks, his thumb gently rubbing against Taehyung’s skin.

Taehyung doesn’t ask what Jeongguk means, he already knew what he was asking about based off of his hand around his throat. So he takes one hand, the other holding his cup of tea between their bodies, and places his closed fist on the center of Jeongguk’s chest.

Right on top of his heart.

It was one of his new gestures he used when they conversed. It meant “Kookie”, his teddy bear.

“Go put it on.” Jeongguk softly orders.

And just like that Taehyung got off of his lap and padded his way into his room to retrieve his lock choker from Kookie. Jeongguk smiled softly at how quickly Taehyung got up to do as he said. He liked Taehyung’s obedience. Don’t get him wrong, it’s not something he’d ever take for granted or take advantage of. But he also knows how headstrong and stubborn he can be, especially nowadays when he rarely ever does what anyone tells him to do. So the fact that he listened to Jeongguk made him happy.  _ He didn’t realize just how “obedient” Taehyung was, though. He didn’t realize just what lengths Taehyung would go to show his obedience. _

Taehyung came back onto the balcony a moment later, his choker shining like a necklace of stars under the moonlight. He takes his place back on Jeongguk’s lap, setting his tea next to the older’s coffee so that he can gently place his hands on Jeongguk’s chest.

“What have you been painting today?” Jeongguk quietly asks.

He wasn’t expecting an answer, Taehyung never told him what it was that he had recently finished painting or was still in the process of painting. But instead he was surprised when Taehyung softly muttered,

“A memory.”

“Of what?”

That he does not answer. Rather, he responds by saying,

“Not  _ what _ , Yeoubi.  _ Why _ is a better question.”

“ _ Why _ are you painting a memory?”

“That is like asking what is the purpose of a painting.”

“I don’t understand.”

“What is the purpose of a painting, Yeoubi? What do they show?”

“A story.”

“And a memory, Yeoubi, is a story. It is a story told so well that it becomes a part of the body. My scars tell a story. My tattoos tell a story. My own actions and behaviour tell a story.”

“If your body tells your stories, then why are you painting your memories?”

He does not answer that question either. Instead, he grabs the nearly finished cigarette from Jeongguk’s mouth and places it between his own lips, inhaling the toxic gas as he shuts his eyes. He flicks the cigarette off the edge of the balcony afterwards, turning his head to the side as he exhales the smoke so he’s not blowing it on Jeongguk’s face. Jeongguk, on the other hand, hasn’t stopped thinking about what Taehyung said about his paintings and them being memories.  _ I wonder if he’ll allow me to see them _ , he wonders.

There’s a moment of silence between them once more, and yet again they find themselves staring into each other’s eyes. They both knew it was going to happen long before again. They couldn’t stop themselves. They were weak to their emotions, and even more so when it came to each other. So when they both leaned in and shut their eyes, and when their lips gently touched it was as though they had finally found solace. They found their salvation in each other, and everything around them faded away into nothingness.  _ Home is where the heart is, but they hold each other’s hearts. _

Jeongguk was the first to pull away, almost abruptly so, as if kissing the other had pained him.

“We shouldn’t…” He quietly says, but there was hesitance in his voice. Even he had trouble convincing himself of that sentence.

“Says who, Yeoubi? What is there to stop us, Yeoubi? There’s nothing, no one. It’s only you and I. Only the moon and the stars can see us right now.”

But Jeongguk doesn’t respond, just sighs and closes his eyes, tilting his head back as he tries to gain some sort of self control.

“Will you ever come back to me?” The question was so quiet that Jeongguk nearly missed it, and a part of him figures it’s because he wasn’t meant to hear it.

“I will. I will always come back to you.” Jeongguk tells Taehyung, opening his eyes again to look the other in his eyes.

“ _ When _ ?”

Jeongguk asks another question rather than answer Taehyung’s. “Do you trust me, Taehyung?”

“With my life.”

“Good. Trust me, then, when I say that this isn’t permanent. I will always end up back to you, Taehyung.”

“Do you promise?”

“I promise.” He pauses. “And when I come back again, I’ll take you anywhere you want to go - how would you like that?”

“Anywhere? Just us?”

The newfound excitement in Taehyung’s demeanor immediately brings a smile to Jeongguk’s face as he nods.

“Anywhere at all, just the two of us.” He repeats. “So start thinking of somewhere to go, alright.”

“I already know where I want to go.”

“Where?”

“The Garden of Eden. Take me to the Garden of Eden. It will be our little safe haven, our oasis. It will be beautiful, and we’ll have nothing to ever fear of ever again.  _ We can be free _ .”

Jeongguk wasn’t even sure if such a place existed, but if Taehyung wants to go there then he’ll tear the Earth apart to find it for him. He softly nods, and gives the younger a slight smile as he gently rubs his nose against Taehyung’s, making the other smile as well.

“Then to the Garden of Eden we’ll go.” He whispers.

They bask in each other’s presence and warmth for an eternity, neither wanting to let the other go just yet. But all good things must come to an end, and soon Jeongguk was standing up, still holding onto Taehyung, and carrying him to the bathroom.

“We should go to bed now.” He tells the blonde as he takes a damp washcloth and cleans the paint off of Taehyung.

Taehyung unnoticeably stiffens at the thought of sleeping. He isn’t ready to fall asleep just yet, he isn’t ready to leave everything behind even if he needs it. He thought he wanted to, he thought he was ready to give up.  _ But he wasn’t ready to let go of Jeongguk, even if it hurt him to stay. _ Fate, however, isn’t on his side, for as soon as Jeongguk tucks him into bed and runs his fingers through his hair to help him fall asleep, he was out like a light. But it wasn’t Taehyung that woke up the next morning.

_ It was someone else. _


	39. 37

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You promised...

_ Jeongguk _

“ _ He’s gone.” _

A wave of confusion washed over me as I stare at Hoseok who just barged into my office. The peach haired male pants heavily as he leans against the door, knuckles turning white from how hard he’s clutching the doorknob. A panicked and terrified expression is painted across his face, his body trembling although I’m not sure if it’s because he’s been running or whatever it is he’s telling me. I set down my pen and the paper I was reading and stand up, walking over to the exhausted male.

“Who’s gone?” I ask him.

“Taehyung.”

I stop in my tracks. A sickening feeling builds up in my stomach and chest, like there’s an aching hole in the middle of my body.

“What?” My voice was small, it was quiet and soft, but in my ears it sounded as though I was screaming.

“Taehyung’s gone.” Hoseok repeats. “We went to give him his breakfast as usual this morning but he wasn’t the-”

His words are cut off as I break into a sprint, dashing out of the office and to Taehyung’s room. The hole in my stomach climbs up my throat, sweat dripping down my forehead as I run. The only thing on my mind is Taehyung and finding him.  _ He’s not gone, right? He can’t be. He wouldn’t leave like that, without telling anyone. Without telling  _ me _. Everyone just probably hasn’t looked in the right place. Taehyung wouldn’t leave us. He wouldn’t leave me. He promised. _ When I come skidding into Taehyung’s room, everything is as it was when I left last night.

Only there is no Taehyung sleeping in the bed.

Even when I pull the covers off of the bed I do not find him. And when I open the bathroom door I don’t find him in there either.  _ This isn’t happening. This isn’t real. Taehyung’s not gone. _ All of his clothes are still in their respective places. All of his shoes are still here. All of his necessities are still here. His phone is still here.  _ Everything besides Taehyung is here. _

“He’s not here.” A soft voice tells me.

I turn around to see Jimin standing on the balcony, his eyes red and teary as he holds a painting in his trembling hands.

“Where is he?” I ask desperately, mind running amok with all of the terrible things that could be happening to Taehyung right now.

I let out a sharp breath when Jimin shrugs, and all of my worries come barreling into me stronger than ever. I begin to turn around, about to make my way to Taehyung’s workshop when Jimin stops me.

“Have you seen what Taehyungie has been painting recently?” He questions.

“No...he never showed me.”

“Did he tell you what he was painting?”

I nod slightly, giving Jimin a questioning look as he now glares at me.

“He said he was painting memories…” I trail off.

“And did he tell you  _ why _ he was painting memories?”

I shake my head, wondering just what he’s getting at. Jimin scoffs lightly, glaring at me harder as he turns around the painting in his arms to show it to me. My eyes slightly widen as I stare at myself, seemingly hovering above the frame, as though I’m hovering over a person, and my hair dripping wet. A large smile is painted on my face as I laugh, and through my eyes I can see the love and fondness I have for the person below me. There’s a small tug on my heart as I recognize this moment as the night I spent with Taehyung after our first job together, the night we talked about the empty space on my chest. This scene is what Taehyung saw when caged him beneath me and began tickling him.

“ _ This _ is one of the memories he was painting, Jeon, but  _ all _ of them include you. He was painting his memories with  _ you _ .” Jimin all but snarls.

_ Why would he- why did he- I need Taehyung now. I need to talk to him again. _ I run back out of the room, ignoring Jimin’s calls after me as I head down to Taehyung’s workshop. I keep seeing Taehyung’s painting in my head, and soon enough all of the memories I share with him begin flashing before my eyes. The night on the rooftop of Kaleidoscope, when he slept on my lap for the first time and a few hours later when he awoke in my bed. When he saved my life, how he refused to be moved after receiving his tattoo. It all plays in front of me like a movie, and with it bringing the immense guilt and pain as a cause of pushing Taehyung away.

_ And then suddenly I can’t stop thinking about what if I can’t find Taehyung. _

The door to Taehyung’s workshop is already open when I get there, the red lights bleeding into the hallway. There’s a moment of relief when I see the light, and for a moment I think I’ve found Taehyung. No one besides me has ever gone inside of his workshop, they feel too uncomfortable to ever step foot inside. So if the door is open and the lights are on, it must mean that Taehyung is inside. He’s probably just come back from the cellars with a prisoner and is in the process of tying them to the table, and he hasn’t had the chance to close the door yet.  _ Yeah, that’s it, it has to be. Taehyung wouldn’t just up and leave with no word. _

I come skidding to a stop just in front of the door, lips lifting into a smile. But that smile falls almost as soon as it appears. In the middle of the room stands not Taehyung, but Yoongi and Jin - both males looking at me with solemn faces as I stand.

“No…” I whisper, slowly stepping away from the door.

“Jeon-” Yoongi begins.

“No!” I shout, feeling anger bubble up inside of me. “Where is he!”

“He’s  _ gone _ , Jeongguk, we don’t kn-” Jin says.

“Stop fucking lying to me! Taehyung wouldn’t leave like this! Stop telling me he’s gone! Taehyung’s not like that! He wouldn’t- He wouldn’t-”

I don’t finish my sentence, I turn around and walk away, trying to think of places Taehyung can be.  _ He has to be somewhere on the estate, but where? _ Taehyung doesn’t normally leave the manor if it isn’t for something necessary, and even then he only goes to the same handful of places.  _ Maybe if I figure out why he left, I can figure out where he is. _ So why did he leave? What was so important that he had to leave without telling anyone?

“Jeongguk?”

I look up to see Namjoon not too far in front of me. The older has an exasperated look on his face, his hair a mess and still in his pajamas.

“Namjoon…” I say softly.

“Are you alright?” Namjoon asks me.

I slightly raise my eyebrows, the question throwing me off a bit.  _ He’s asking  _ me _ if I’m okay? Shouldn’t it be the other way around? _

“I- are  _ you _ alright?” I instead question.

Namjoon softly chuckles, but I can tell it’s forced. He rocks a bit on the balls of his feet, looking around the hall as if he’s searching for something.

“I’d be better if I knew where Taehyung is and if he’s okay, but I know we probably won’t hear from him for a few days.” He tells me.

“A few days? What?” I all but shout.

Namjoon gives me a half smile, one of his dimples appearing in the process.

“Why don’t we talk somewhere private? There are some things you should probably know about Taehyung.” He says.

“ _ Probably _ ?” I repeat with a raised eyebrow.

But Namjoon only chuckles and turns around with the order of “follow me”. I do as he says and follow him up to his room, both of us taking seats on the balcony. Namjoon doesn’t speak right away. He relaxes completely into his seat, closing his eyes for a few minutes as he heaves out a long sigh.

“Taehyung......doesn’t deal with negative emotions well, to say the least.” He says after a few minutes. “He’ll typically either lash out at the cause of those emotions, or he’ll run away from it. Neither are the best, but if I had to choose, him lashing out is much better than when he runs away. When he lashes out, it only lasts for a few hours, but the effects of when he runs away can last anywhere between a week and a month.”

“What happens when he runs away? Do you know where he is? Or when he’ll be back?” I question.

Namjoon shakes his head, sighing again before burying his face in his hands.

“There’s something else I should explain about Taehyung, more so what happens with him when he runs away.” He lifts his face from his hands, slightly frowning as he looks at the landscape in front of him. “When he runs away, he falls asleep-”

“He what?” I interrupt, my brows furrowing together in confusion.

“If you’d let me finish, I was just about to explain it. When I say he falls asleep, I mean that the Taehyung  _ you _ know - the bright, cute, and caring Taehyung - he falls asleep. It’s how he mentally recharges, in a way. Sleeping like how any other person does doesn’t really help him because of his dreams, and when he falls asleep this way he doesn’t dream at all. It’s just peaceful darkness. Since he’s asleep, it’s as though there’s no one to control his body. No one to make decisions on what to do, or how to act, things of that nature. He’s just- an empty vessel, almost. That vessel will still operate, of course, it will keep itself alive, but it will be similar to a robot.

“There will be no emotions, no talking, nothing at all. And since it’s just an empty vessel, that leaves it open to anyone who wants to use it: in this case, all of Taehyung’s  _ voices _ in his head. They take control of Taehyung’s body and do terrible things, and there’s no one or thing to stop them. They come and go at random times without reason, and they’re very hard to predict. They typically tend to stay far away from us while Taehyung is asleep, and knowing Taehyung - we won’t find him unless he wants to be found.”

I stay quiet for a moment, taking in the information.

“So...Taehyung’s asleep right now?” I ask slowly.

Namjoon nods.

“How do we wake him up?”

“ _ We _ don’t. He will wake up himself. Before he falls asleep, he usually leaves behind something to use as an ‘alarm’ or something to wake him up. Most of the time it’s a painting, typically of whatever it was that caused him to fall asleep in the first place. I know it seems a little contradictory, but Taehyung says that it reminds him that he’s still got unfinished business to take care of. I’m not quite sure how it works, he, too, was confused when he explained it to me, but I know that when he sees something specific it will wake him up.”

My eyes widen as I think back to the painting Jimin showed me earlier, the painting of me.

“A painting...?” I say in disbelief.

Namjoon looks at me, an unreadable expression on his face, and nods.

“Fuck.” I whisper to myself, rubbing my face. “I need to find him.”

“You won’t be able to. Taehyung will come home when he wants to.” Namjoon responds, watching me as I stand up.

“I have to try, at least. I can’t just sit back and wait for him to show up, who knows what can happen in that time. I.........I  _ need _ him.” I whisper the last part, gaze pointed at the ground so I don’t have to see the way Namjoon’s staring at me.

“I understand. Let me know if you need any help at all, I’m more than willing to help out.”

“Thank you, Namjoon. I mean it.”

I look back at the older, giving him a tiny smile of gratitude.

“Of course. I want to find him too, but the chances of us finding him before he wants to be found are slim, so I hope you’re prepared to work hard.” Namjoon tells me, returning my smile.

“I’ll do whatever it takes to get him back.”

There’s a look of joy and satisfaction in Namjoon’s eyes after I say that, and his smile broadens.

“I’m glad you will. It’s nice to see you still care for him after these past few weeks.” He says softly.

I look away from the older at that, turning my gaze back to the ground.

“I-” I begin.

“I know you’ve got your reasons for treating him that way, and as much as I want to dislike you for making Taehyung hurt so much after the close relationship you created, I do know that you’re not the type of person to do treat Taehyung like that without a damn good reason. You’re completely smitten with him, and you’re both very possessive about the things you care about. However, I do think it’s about time you tell him your reasons for treating him so coldly.” He pauses, and I take the moment to look at him once more.

“Jackson told me that you’re gathering info about our enemies. That’s why you’ve been pushing Taehyung away, isn’t it? You don’t want them or your enemies to take advantage of your relationship and use it as a way to hurt Taehyung, or you, for that matter. Am I right?” He asks.

_ How the hell did he figure it out so easily? _ Feeling both embarrassed and guilty, I avoid eye contact with Namjoon and nod slightly, letting him know he’s right.

“I figured it was something like that. But you aren’t alone, Jeongguk. I know it’s hard to make honest friends in this life, but you’re not alone. If you let us, we can help you, especially the person you’ve been pushing away. All you have to do is open up.” Namjoon continues.

I nod once again, not knowing how to respond and wanting to leave.

“Thank you for telling me about Taehyung. I’m going to gather up a scouting group to try and find him. Any ideas on where to search first?” I question.

“He won’t go anywhere familiar, it might wake Taehyung up. I’ll map out those places for you.”

“Thanks, again.”

“No problem. Let’s get going now. The sooner we start, the better.”

Namjoon and I both head up to my office, and as Namjoon grabs a map and begins mapping places I call Bogum and a few others up to my office. Bogum is both shocked and worried when I tell him that I want him to look for Taehyung. Much to my surprise, he and the younger both ended up becoming friends despite their first rocky encounter.  _ No one can resist Taehyung’s charms. _ Once we establish a good starting plan, Bogum and the rest of the scouting team head out to get started. I can’t relax knowing that Taehyung is still somewhere out there and I don’t know if he’s okay.

The amount of people who have a vendetta against him is incredibly high, and it’s probably going to rise exponentially if he goes on a rampage while out. We need to find him, for both his safety and the public’s. But even as three, almost four days pass, there’s still absolutely no sign of him. It’s almost as if he’s disappeared off of the face of the earth.

“Jeongguk, you should really eat something.” Namjoon says, knocking me from my reverie.

I turn away from the wall I had been staring at since I sat down and notice almost everyone looking at me. I’ve been so focused on trying to find Taehyung that I’ve neglected taking care of myself, not that I notice too much. It’s more of everyone around me having to constantly remind me to eat and sleep, and I can’t say I’m not surprised that they’re actually worrying about me. I didn’t expect for them to actually care this much, especially after the way I’ve been treating Taehyung recently and his sudden disappearance as a cause.

“You know Taehyung will be pissed when he finds out you’ve been skipping meals again.” Bambam cuts in.

The corner of my lip slightly lifts in a half smile as I remember how cute Taehyung would look as he’d scold me for missing meals.

“Hurry up and eat before your food gets cold. I didn’t cook just for it to go to waste.” Jin says with a scowl, not quite looking at me.

“Right.” I mutter back, picking up my fork and slowly shoveling food into my mouth.

_ I’m really fucking pathetic, aren’t I? Not even four months ago I was the kind of person who people envied and despised, someone that everyone either wanted to get close to or steer away from. I was a person that no one could ever get close to, I was the king in an impenetrable castle. And now here I am, almost completely shutting down because somehow, my castle isn’t as inaccessible as I thought it was. _ And the one person who made it through the locked gates, the one person who saw what I kept hidden within my walls, left me.  _ He only did what I did to him, though, didn’t he? _ I let out a deep sigh.  _ I need a distraction. _

A loud ringing sound silences everyone in the room. There was something about the ringing that made my stomach churn, there was a tight feeling rising in my chest as everyone stopped talking and turned towards the source of the sound. Namjoon slowly pulls out his phone from his pocket, staring with wary eyes at the screen. It seemed like everyone, not just myself, had a bad feeling about what was about to happen.

“It’s an unknown caller.” Namjoon announces, placing his still ringing phone face up on the table.

“Answer it.” I tell him. “Put it on speaker.”

He nods slightly and answers the phone, pressing the speaker button so we all can hear what’s going on on the other side of the line. For a moment, all we can hear is deep breathing and small whimpers.

“Hello?” Namjoon calls out.

The breathing stops briefly, and the line goes silent.

“ _ Papa. _ ”

Several people gasp at the sound of Taehyung’s voice, and a few others, including myself, open our mouths to say something when Namjoon holds his hand up, signaling us to be quiet.

“Taehyungie? Sweetheart, where are you?” Namjoon asks.

“ _ Papa, _ ” Taehyung cries before bursting into tears. “ _ I’m sorry. _ ” We hear him say through his tears. “ _ I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. _ ”

His words become a jumbled mess - parts breaking apart or meshing together or becoming completely incomprehensible through his crying.

“Taehyung- Tae- baby you need to breathe. You’re going to pass out if you keep crying like that. Breathe for me, apricity. You’re going to be okay.” Namjoon softly reassures the sobbing boy.

“ _ I- I- I- I- I- _ ”

“Shh, it’s okay, bubs. Just breathe, okay? Can you do that for me?”

Taehyung doesn’t respond, and we listen as his crying begins to slow, but not quite stop.

“ _ I- I did something bad, papa. _ ” He whispers, causing Namjoon and his group to tense up. “ _ I-I didn’t mean it! I s-swear I di-didn’t! I didn’t want to do it! I swear! I’m sorry! I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to! It was an accident! I didn’t mean to! I’m sorry! _ ”

The sickening feeling in my stomach increases as I listen to Taehyung repeat the same words over and over, stumbling over his words each time.

“ _ I didn’t mean to kill them. _ ” He finally says, and I feel the blood draining from my face. “ _ But I had to.” _

“Taehyung what happened?” Namjoon questions, urgency lacing his voice.

“ _ I-It was an accident, ‘m sorry. I-I couldn’t stop it. T-They just came f-from nowhere and and and they lied to me and tried to- so I-I had to s-stop them a-and then more people were coming a-a-and- they called me a monster- I’m not a monster! _ ” He cuts himself off with a gasp.

It’s silent for a while, and then slowly sounds can be heard from the other side of the line. I can’t tell what it is at first, but steadily it increases in volume until I can. And when it does I feel my stomach lurch.  _ It’s Taehyung giggling. _

“ _ How dare they! How dare they call me a monster, those worthless lumps of shit! I’m not a fucking monster! I’ll carve their fucking eyes out, the damn liars! I’m not a monster! I’m not! I’m not! I’m not! I’m not! _ ” He shouts in rage.

There’s a lot of movement on the other side along with Taehyung’s shouting. Namjoon keeps calling the younger’s name, but he’s completely ignored. The last thing we hear is Taehyung growling “ _ I’ll show them a fucking monster _ ” before there’s a loud crash.

And then the line goes dead.

And that’s the last we hear of Taehyung for another week and some odd days. We tried tracking him based off of the bodies he left in his wake, but it wasn’t much use. He’s a pro when it comes to getting away with murder, and so we were all left back at square one, not that we had ever moved on from it. I focused all of my time on finding Taehyung, but at the end of the day I wasn’t any closer, and the amount of work I had to do began to pile up. But even when I would take care of business, the only thing on my mind was Taehyung, and as thoughts of Taehyung began to increase, so did my desire for a distraction.

“Jeongguk!” Someone shouts.

I blink a few times, realizing that I dazed out in the middle of a meeting. Jimin, the one who shouted my name, sighs in annoyance as he shakes his head.

“The allies from the Triumvirate are starting to cause trouble. We need to take care of them now before they pose a bigger issue.” He tells me.

I nod and lean back in my chair, crossing my arms across my chest as I stare at nothing in particular.

“Start making extermination groups, we'll just take them all out at once.” I order. “If that’s all, you’re all dismissed.”

Everyone begins to file out of the room, only to stop almost as soon as they turn around. Confused as to why they’ve stopped moving, I stand up and start walking towards them, feeling more confused as I see them staring in shock at them. I brush past Mark and Jinyoung to the front of the group, only to stop mid step. There, in the open doorway, stands Taehyung - his clothes ruffled and stained with blood as well as his hands and face, his eyes hidden by his long, unruly blonde hair.

“Taehyung…” I say softly as I walk up to him, reaching out to grab his shoulder. “You’re ba-”

He flinches away from me.

I freeze, eyes widening at what he just did.

“Taehyung...?” I trail off.

“ _ Don’t touch me _ .” He says.

My hand falls limply to my side as I stare at Taehyung, stuck in a state of shock.

“I’ll be in my room.” He murmurs before turning around and walking away.

_ And it hurt just as much as when he left without saying anything. _


	40. 38

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Touch him, and I'll kill you.

_ Taehyung _

Soft pants leave my lips as I stand in the shower, the hot water beating down relentlessly on me and turning my skin red. Steam fills the entire room like a cloudy blanket, shrouding my vision. I bow my head and softly shut my eyes as blurry images from the last week flash in my mind. I try to block them out, but it’s as though the harder I try to push them away, the harder they try to present themselves to me. It was a confusing mess, and all I wanted was serenity. I don’t know how long I’ve been gone, what time it even is now, or what the fuck I did while I was gone. It was as if a huge gap of time, of memories, of events, had wiped themselves from my mind.

My entire body aches for reasons I don’t know, and I can’t tell if the sharp pains I feel all over my body are from cuts and open wounds or from physical exertion. I wasn’t aware that I was no longer kneeling as I cradle my throbbing head in my hands, but rather crouched on the shower floor. Slowly, the water loses its heat, and the freezing drops of water hit my sensitive skin like sharp knives. I brush it off at first, trying to organize and make sense of my thoughts but to no avail. All of my memories are in disarray, no longer following a cohesive timeline but rather randomly placed together like a child creating a building from Lego's with no instructions.

When I finally do manage to stand back up and leave the shower, it’s when the cold water had changed my skin from red and raw to pale and ever so slightly blue. I grab the nearest towel and begin to pat my skin dry, noticing how the white fabric stains a crimson red from different cuts and gashes around my body. I only wonder where they came from for a moment, but I know that no matter how hard I try, the memories won’t be given back to, so there’s no point in thinking about them. Besides, it’s probably best that I don’t remember anything.

After I’ve dried my body, I place the soiled towel in the hamper and grab a new one to dry my hair. I gently rub the towel across my head as I go into my bedroom, pausing the action momentarily to pull on a pair of boxers. As I continue to dry my hair, ignoring the wounds littered across my body for now, I hear a gentle, almost hesitant, knock at the door. I stop what I’m doing, taking a moment to respond. I don’t really want to see anyone right now, but I know that everyone has been worried and I can’t exactly hide forever.

“Come in.” I quietly say, softly tugging the towel on my head to cover my face slightly in a small effort to hide myself.

The list of people I expected to walk in was rather long, compared to previous lists from similar occasions as this, but for some reason Jeongguk wasn’t on it. Well, he was, but he also wasn’t. Jeongguk lies in a sort of gray area now, I’m never quite sure where he stands with me anymore. As such, I wasn’t sure how to feel as I watched Jeongguk be the one to enter my room, the sound of the door clicking shut resounding in my ears like a bomb. When I look at Jeongguk, I could easily tell that he isn’t okay.

Jeongguk is more of a silent sufferer, and when something is bothering him he builds up a wall, a facade, a mask to hide his pain, his heart, his vulnerabilities. But just like any other person, he had his small tells that gave him away if you knew where to look. His eyes, for one, were always a dead giveaway, however, they were a book that only I could read.  _ It takes one to know one, afterall. _ Dark eyebags hang under his cold eyes, even more prominent against his sickly pale skin. His movements are terribly stiff, yet slightly uncoordinated. His hair, much like mine, began to grow rather long, long enough for him to put it into small ponytails, yet he left it alone, and seemingly rarely tended to it other than the occasional wash and brushing.

And his clothes......Jeongguk has always been rather neat about his attire, no matter what it is he’s wearing, but recently there’s been less effort in his clothes. Not a large amount, but enough for those who know what kind of a person Jeongguk is and how he usually dresses to notice. This Jeongguk isn’t the Jeongguk I’ve learned to know the past year. This is a Jeongguk who’s just finding out about emotions and is suffering because of them.

“Taehyung, can we talk?” Jeongguk asks quietly.

It takes me a moment to nod, and I can’t help but stiffen when he walks closer. It was an involuntary reaction, I couldn’t help but take the smallest movement away from him. There were all kinds of warning lights and sirens blaring off in my head at his advance that I instinctively shied away from his presence. A wave of guilt and regret, however, passes over me once both he and I realize what I had done, and I see the hurt and despair flash in Jeongguk’s eyes as he stops. I open my mouth, wanting to explain my actions and let him know that it’s not that I  _ want _ to avoid his touch, but all that comes out is a mere “I’m sorry,” in a hushed whisper.

Jeongguk lowers his head a bit, enough for his ink hair to cover his eyes, yet I can still see his clenched jaw and his body momentarily tense up. There’s a moment of silence between us and then Jeongguk raises his head, dark eyes carefully studying my frame. It’s not the first time that Jeongguk has seen me in only my underwear, nor the second, nor the fifth, but this is the first time that a small, very small, part of me felt uncomfortable.

“Would you like me to help you dress your injuries? We can talk as I do so, if you’re comfortable with that.” He says.

There used to be a time where I would do anything to be near Jeongguk, to feel the warmth of his skin on my own, for our bodies to join together so perfectly like puzzle pieces. But now, for some reason, just being near anyone in general makes an intense feeling of panic course through my veins. The thought of someone touching me, of feeling someone’s skin on my own, makes me want to cry, to hurl, to disappear-  _ Oh. That’s it. I see now. I know what’s going on. _

“Yeah......that’s fine.” I tell Jeongguk, my voice slightly scratchy and making me wonder if I had been screaming before I woke up.

Jeongguk follows me into the bathroom and stands a safe distance away as I sit myself on top of the sink counter.

“Do you have a medkit?” Jeongguk questions, watching as I slowly swing my feet back and forth.

“Under the sink.” I answer.

He takes slow, hesitant steps towards me, carefully eyeing my reaction. I force myself to stay calm as he gets closer, ignoring the little alarm in the back of my mind.  _ It’s okay. I’m okay. It’s only Jeongguk. He’d never touch me in a way that would hurt me. It’s okay. _ I watch as Jeongguk grabs cotton balls and disinfectant, carefully dousing the clear liquid on the cotton. I try to keep as still as possible once he brings his hand to my face, but for a second I flinch away. Jeongguk slightly frowns, pulling his hand away as I lean back into my original position.

“Are you sure you’re okay with this? Would you rather I bring Mina or Soobin up here?” He asks.

I shake my head and try to give him a smile, but it comes out more as a grimace.

“I’ll react the same, no matter who it is.” I tell him.

He nods slightly, reaching out to me again and this time I don’t flinch away. The cool, wet cotton ball presses against the side of my face, and I feel a sharp sting running across my face from a cut.

“Can I ask why you keep flinching away?” Jeongguk softly asks, dabbing at the cut.

“My mind.....my memories, more so, are a mess right now, and mentally, a portion of my mind is stuck in a time where not all touches had innocent intentions.” I respond, just as gently.

Jeongguk glances at me for a moment before going back to his work.

“Do you want to talk about it?” He murmurs.

“Is it something you wanted to ask about?”

“It’s been on the back of my mind, but we can talk when you’re ready, I won’t push you.”

My lips quirk up in a half smile of gratitude before almost immediately falling.

“Then we’ll talk about it another time.” I say, causing Jeongguk to nod. “So, what did you want to talk about?”

“Do you have to ask?”

“I figured it’d be polite to ask rather than assume.”

Jeongguk makes a sound of amusement, a ghost of a smile on his lips as he moves on to apply a cream to my cut before moving down to my chest.

“How the hell did you get so many cuts?” Jeongguk says almost to himself.

“I’m not sure. Must’ve happened when the demons or V was in control, probably the former. V doesn’t like causing unnecessary problems.”

“Who is V?”

“It’s just an abbreviation of ‘vessel’. It’s how we refer to me when I’m asleep and no one’s in control of my body.”

Jeongguk nods, making an “ah” noise.

“I was going to ask you where you went, but I’m supposing you don’t know that either.”

I nod, causing Jeongguk to hum slightly. We’re both silent for a few minutes, Jeongguk focused on bandaging my wounds and me focused on watching Jeongguk. There’s still a lot for us to talk about, but neither of us can speak.  _ More like we don’t want to. We’re just ignoring the problem. Neither of us is brave enough to face it. _ But the issue is that by leaving the main problem alone, it’s created more and more problems, all piling onto one another and ensnaring us in a deadly labyrinth.  _ We have to fix them one by one, but which one do we start with?  _ The smaller problems. Start from the bottom and work our way up, starting with the one right in front of us.

“I’m sorry.” I all but blurt out as Jeongguk is rubbing cream on my waist.

Surprised, the older quickly lifts his head to look at me, confusion written across his features.

“Pardon?” He questions.

“I said I’m sorry.” I repeat. “For disappearing like I did.”

Jeongguk smiles lightly. “From what Namjoon told me, it’s not something that can really be helped, can it? I admit, it did throw me off for a while, I wasn’t expecting it. But you’re back now, and in one piece, that’s the least I could ask for.”

“Yeah.....I guess so.”

“There’s something else I’d like to ask for, if it’s not too much.”

“What is it?”

“Next time you need to leave, can you tell me when you go?”

There was almost a silent statement in addition to his question, of a cold heart which died too soon.  _ I don’t think I’ll be able to take it if you leave me like that again. _

“Yes.” I tell him, the honey honey toned words dripping like poison off of my tongue.

_ I never plan on letting him know when I leave again. _

“Are you........Are you feeling......better? Are you feeling better now? Did sleeping help you?” Jeongguk asks cautiously another minute later.

_ I don’t think I ever will, not any time soon. Sleeping is just a momentary relief, when I wake up the pain is still there. It doesn’t go away. _

“Yeah, I am.”

Jeongguk gives me a small smile before gingerly placing a bandage on my thigh.

“That’s good.” He murmurs, and I quickly agree.

“What was the meeting about earlier? The one I walked in on?” I inquire, changing the topic.

“Some of the groups from the list you made who are going against us are becoming unruly, so we’re just going to get rid of them all before they can cause too much trouble.”

I nod. “Have plans already been made?”

Jeongguk glances at me through his eyelashes. “Are you planning on joining?”

“Of course I am, why wouldn’t I?”

But Jeongguk doesn’t answer. He just puts one last bandaid on my leg and begins cleaning up.

“Are you tired? Or hungry?” He instead questions.

“Not really, but given my current physical state I guess I should try to sleep for a bit. Thank you for helping me.”

“Of course. Will you be down for breakfast tomorrow?”

“Depends on tomorrow.”

I slide off of the counter, bypassing Jeongguk to place the long forgotten towel around my neck into the hamper.

“If Namjoon isn’t already waiting for his turn to come in, could you tell him to come see me?” I ask Jeongguk as I head into my bedroom.

“Yeah. Is there anything else you need?”

_ There’s a lot that I need that I can’t have. _

“No, that’s it, thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” There’s a pause as Jeongguk heads to the door, stopping once his hand wraps around the doorknob. “Goodnight, Taehyung.”

“Goodnight, Jeongguk.”

And once again he was gone.

\---

Green.

The door was green.

It wasn’t a bright green, or a soft green, nor even a dark green. It was a disgusting green, a vomit green, faded and chipped yet standing all too noticeably against the white walls of the hall. The doorknob is bronze, a depressing brown shade. Its varnish coating has long since faded away, and now only small spots of the shiny bronze remain on top of a dull, lifeless brown. The numbers which had once stood brightly on the front of the door are now gone, and only the faintest change in color could be seen to identify what used to be there; 564.

Sweat slowly drips down my forehead, my eyes all but glaring at the door in front of me as I steady my breathing. Adrenaline burns like fire in my veins, the high of the past few hours still raging in my bones. This is the sixth and final sub group of the night that my team and I are getting rid of. It’s already nearing four in the morning, so we have to make this quick. I quickly scan the surroundings, coming up with a plan to swiftly get in and kill everyone without causing much of a fuss. The surrounding rooms are vacant, this apartment building is hardly ever used, and when it is it’s occupied by druggies and lowly gang members. The neighborhood it’s located in is also in a rather dangerous place, so I can get away with a lot before anyone comes to see what’s happening.

_ All the more reason to make this quick. _ I take a deep breath as I close my eyes, after which I jerk my head to the side and cracking it. I roll my shoulders and slightly stretch my legs before clearing my mind again. A loud, maniacal laugh echoes through the halls, but I don’t flinch. I know that the laughter is only a product of my mind and it accompanies the ever growing bloodlust in my stomach. I ball my hand into a fist and reach out, knocking several times on the door. I stand not too close yet not too from the door, keeping my left foot ahead of me and my right foot back. There are loud voices coming from the other side of the door and lots of movement.

“Dammit Johnny if that’s you again playing tricks I’m-” A man says, his voice getting progressively louder and clearer as he nears the door.

I hear the locks turning and see the doorknob turning, opening the slightest fraction before I rear my foot back and kick the door the rest of the way open. There’s a shout of shock and pain as the man on the other side of the door falls backwards and I immediately rush in, hands pulling out the blood stained knives on my thighs. I can hear others calling out, asking what’s wrong and what happened, but all they get in response is screams of pain. Both knives are planted in the man’s chest, his arms flailing uselessly by his sides as he gasps for air, only to cough up blood instead.

He looks at me with pained, fearful eyes, and as he takes his last breath the smallest of tears escapes his eye.  _ Only a man with regrets fears death. _ Once I hear footsteps approaching, I quickly draw my knives from the newly made corpse and jump to my feet. There are only three other people in the apartment, all men. They rush me at once, not having any weapons on them other than their fists. The first man to rush me can barely stand up properly, much less throw a proper punch. As I slip past his frame I can smell the stench of alcohol from his breath. The next two approach me at once while the other drunkenly trips over his partner’s corpse. I grab one of them by the collar of his shirt, slamming him against the wall before kicking the other man away.

Once he’s temporarily out of the way, I thrust my knife into the man pinned against the wall, his eyes wide in shock as he struggles to breathe. Crimson stains his throat, and coats his teeth. Soon, his body begins to go limp to which I pull the knife from his throat in time to turn and dodge the drunken man who swings an umbrella at me. I mentally roll my eyes at his lack of coordination, using it to my advantage to dive under his arm and lodge one of my knives deep in his side in the process. He hollers in pain, sobbing in pain as I twist the knife harshly before removing it, only to plunge it between his ribs. The last man still stands fearfully against the wall where I kicked him, eyes wide in horror and breathing deeply. He shudders as I make my way to him, squeezing his eyes shut.

“P-Please-” He doesn’t get to finish his sentence as I calmly slit his throat, his eyes flying open as I do.

He holds his hands to his neck, trying to stop the bleeding. I wipe the blood on my knives onto a handkerchief I pulled from my pocket as the man falls to his knees, trembling there for a moment before tilting over and collapsing on the ground. I pay him no mind, finishing cleaning my knives before placing them back into their sheathes.

“All done. You can come in now.” I say loudly.

“Copy that. Go ahead and start looking around in the meantime.” Yoongi tells me, his voice sounding from the invisible earpiece planted in my left ear.

“On it.”

I step over the bodies lying in the middle of the narrow hall, careful to not step in any blood. I head into the small living room and joint kitchen, pausing in the doorway to look around. There’s only the basics in here; a sofa and loveseat, a small tv, two or three small photos of landscapes. Random junk is strewn about the table and sofas, and in the kitchen there’s only beer bottles and snacks from the convenient store down the street. I step further into the room, about to head down the hall across from the kitchen when I hear something knock over, probably something small judging by the sound of the thump, and the quietest, almost silent gasp.

_ There’s someone else in here. _

I grab one of my knives out and silently make my way to the source of the sound. The sound came from behind the loveseat, a rather predictable place, but then I suppose given how untimely my appearance was and how little time it took me to take the four men out, it’s not shocking that the person hiding didn’t have enough time to find a good hiding spot. I peek my head around the corner of the loveseat, seeing a dark haired woman crouched behind there, completely unaware of my presence. I reach out, grabbing a fistful of her dark locks as I drag her up. She lets out a loud, high pitched scream as I pin her against the wall, holding my knife against her tan neck.

Almost as soon as I clearly look at her, an uneasy feeling builds up in my stomach. I take a moment to study her, looking at her from head to toe. She has mid-length dark brown, almost black hair, and matching dark brown eyes. Hues of gold and silver eyeshadow color her eyes, the look topped with cat winged eyeliner and (most likely) fake eyelashes. Her rosy painted cheeks contrast almost unnaturally with her tanned skin, the blush being much too dark, and her strawberry pink lips are parted in shock. She wears a fitted pink crop top with no bra underneath, white joggers, and pink sneakers. A pink, floral hair clip pins her hair back and a diamond butterfly choker wraps around her throat.

_ There’s something off about her. _

“P-p-please don’t hurt me!” She cries out.

I narrow my eyes at the plea, pressing my knife closer against her skin and making her whimper.

“Who are you?” I growl out.

“M-my name is Sana. T-those men broke in a-and had me captive here f-for weeks.” She tells me.

_ Broke in? Held her captive? _

“This is your apartment?” I question.

“Y-yes.”

“How long have you been living here?”

“A-almost t-three years.”

My eyes narrow further at that.

“W-who are you?” Sana asks.

I don’t answer. Not just because I don’t want to but because at that moment my team along with Jeongguk enter the apartment.

“Spread out. Look for anything useful.” I hear Jeongguk say behind me.

I keep my eyes on the nervous girl in front of me, not moving even when Jeongguk comes behind me.

“Help me! Please!” Sana shouts, attempting to push me back and run to Jeongguk.

She doesn’t even make it a step ahead before I’m slamming her back against the wall, pressing my blade so hard against her neck it draws a few drops of blood.

“Touch him and I’ll skin you alive and make you watch.” I snarl, glaring at the brunette.

She cowers away from me, small cries leaving her lips as I keep her in place.  _ Why would she try to run to Jeongguk when he’s clearly with me? _ I feel a hand on my shoulder, but make no moves to let the girl go.

“Who is this?” Jeongguk asks.

“Sana. She says those guys broke into here and held her captive for weeks.” I answer.

“Why did they hold you captive?” Jeongguk turns his attention to Sana.

“I know things they don’t want me to.” She mutters darkly.

That grabs both of our attention.

“Who?” Jeongguk questions.

“T-those guys are a part of a group that call themselves the Purgers; a vigilante-like organization that takes it upon themselves to get rid of anyone they deem to be a threat to their beliefs. I.....I used to date the son of the head of the group, but things didn’t go well between us and I ended up leaving but, well he sent his guys after me and here I am.”

_ The Purgers _ is a group I know all too well. They’re one of the groups that my team and I needed protection from(as weak as it sounds). The biggest problem about them is that they neer stay in one place for too long, and never stay in the same place twice, making it hard to pinpoint their location. If we could figure out their location, we could get rid of them, but they guard themselves like they’re guarding a national treasure. This girl could definitely help us find them, but something about her rubs me the wrong way.

“J, let me talk to her alone for a moment. You go and assist the others.” Jeongguk tells me.

I give him an unsure look, but he just gently nudges my side. I turn back to Sana, giving her one last glare.

“Try anything and I’ll hurt you so bad you’ll wish you were dead.” I warn her, causing her to gulp and nod.

Slowly, I pull my knife away from her neck and she takes in a deep breath of air. I sheathe my knife once more and step back, glancing at Jeongguk one more time, the older nodding at me, before leaving. I find my way to the bedroom where Jimin goes through drawers and small containers around the room. I watch him for a moment before turning to study the room, finding it just as murky and desolate as the rest of the house and soon I grimace beneath my mask.

“Jimin.” I call out, walking closer to the silver haired male.

“Yeah?”

“Something is wrong here. With  _ her _ .” Both Jimin and I turn to look out the door.

Due to where we’re standing and the placement of the door, we can see a portion of the living room, and Jeongguk along with Sana who speak in the same place I left them. Only Sana tries continuously to cling onto Jeongguk who politely pushes her back every time she gets too close for his liking.

“You mean other than her obvious attraction to the boss?” Jimin questions.

“ _ Yes _ .”

“Okay, what is it?”

“ _ Everything _ . Look around Jimin, and then look at her. You know what she told us? That she’s lived in this apartment for  _ three years _ and those guys I just killed kept her captive in here for the past few weeks.”

“I’m not following.”

I let out a deep sigh, closing my eyes momentarily.

“Jimin look at this fucking place. She’s lived here for three years and it looks like someone has either just moved in or barely lives here. There are no pictures on the wall, none of herself or family. The only food here is junk food from a convenient store. Look at that girl and tell me if you think she’s going anywhere near those donuts and beers. Look at the clothes you’ve been taking out of those drawers and look at what she’s wearing. Look at the color scheme of this place, for fucks sake. And don’t even try to tell me that she’s probably broke because that choker around her throat has to cost at least nearly 1k. That brings up  _ another _ point.  _ Look _ at her, at what she’s wearing, at her  _ makeup _ . Does she look like someone who has been held  _ captive _ for  _ weeks _ by four men?” I rant.

Jimin takes a minute to absorb what I just said before nodding.

“Yeah, yeah you’re right. What do you want to do, then?” He asks me.

“Right now, nothing. We don’t know enough to make any drastic moves. For now we’ll just keep an eye on her. Start telling the others. Keep your guard up around her, don’t reveal any necessary sensitive information.” I tell him.

Jimin nods again before leaving the room, going to spread the message to the others. I take another look around the dingy room, silently judging everything.  _ This is wrong. Everything is wrong. I don’t trust that girl. _ A half an hour or so passes in which I slowly trail around the house, looking through everything as I was ordered while still keeping an eye on Jeongguk and Sana. I silently cringe when I see her trying to give Jeongguk puppy dog eyes and pout cutely while clinging to Jeongguk’s arm. When we finally leave, making sure to leave no evidence of our presence behind us, it’s a little past five in the morning and the sun is almost rising.

Jeongguk tells us that Sana will be coming with us as she can help us find the Purgers. I don’t like the idea of her being at our base, but say nothing nonetheless. Sana walks closely to Jeongguk, and when we get into the van she even takes the liberty of sitting next to him. Jimin, Jin, Namjoon and I sit on the row of seats across from them, Jimin to my left and Namjoon to my right, and Sana across from me. Yoongi drives the van, and Hoseok sits in the passenger seat beside him. The ride back is silent, if you don’t count Sana blabbering onto Jeongguk about how he’s her saviour and similar, annoying ramblings. I lean forward in my seat, elbows perched on my thighs as I quietly twirl a knife between my hands, keeping my gaze on the weapon.

“So- what are all of your guys’ names?” Sana brightly asks, referencing to my team and I.

There’s a moment of silence before anyone answers. Namjoon is the first one to speak up.

“Call me King.” He says.

“Queen.” Jin introduces next.

“Ace.”

“Jack.”

“Knight.”

“O-oh...okay. And you?” Sana asks, and I can imagine her looking at me.

I say nothing, nor do I look at the girl.

“That one…” Namjoon begins to say. “That’s Joker.”

“Well...you all have.....interesting names. Oh, I know! I should add you into my contacts. Jeonggukie let me take a picture of you for your profile picture!”

I lift my head up when she says that, a growl reverberating from the back of my throat. Sana holds her phone up, about to take a picture of Jeongguk when I take my knife and throw it at her phone. She lets out a scream as the phone flies from her hand and is pinned to the side of the van.

“What the hell? My phone!” She yells.

Ignoring her, I stand up and pull both my knife and her phone from the wall, ignoring her shouts to give her her phone back. Instead I pry her phone apart, much to her dismay, and start pulling parts out until I find what I’m looking for.

A bug device.

Sana finally shuts up once I take the device from her phone, and both she and Jeongguk look at it with wide eyes. A sound similar to a mix of a growl and a snarl (yes, the two are different) resounds through the now quiet van and I bring the bug up to my lips.

“ _ I am going to find you and hang you with a noose made of your own guts _ .” I say lowly.

I drop the bug onto the ground and crush it beneath my heel before picking up the pieces and both the remains of the bug and Sana’s broken phone to Namjoon, who already has a plastic bag out to put everything in. After that I take my seat again, leaning forward on my elbows, head bowed, and twirling my knife in my hands.


	41. 39

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The doctor is in the house.

_ Taehyung _

When the van stops, Sana is the first to step out, dragging Jeongguk with her. Had I not been so wary of the brunette, I probably would have laughed at the look on Jeongguk’s face.

“Yoongi and I will get started on a background search, Tae you make sure everyone else in the mansion is aware of the situation. The rest of you keep an eye on Sana and Jeongguk.” Namjoon orders once Jeongguk and Sana are out of ear shot.

“Shouldn’t I be keeping an eye on them?” I question, not wanting to let the pair out of my sight.

“Once you’ve done as I said you can. Right now I think it’s best if you get cleaned up and head to the infirmary just to make sure everything is still in place. You did go through six exterminations in one night and your previous injuries haven’t fully healed yet, so let Mina check you out, alright?”

I nod.

“Okay, then. Let’s head inside now before they get suspicious.” Namjoon says.

We all head in, separating at the staircase to do our own tasks. I go to my bedroom first, setting my weapons on the dresser to be cleaned later before taking off my gear. I head into the bathroom after that, tossing my soiled clothes in the hamper before taking a quick, hot shower and scrubbing off the sweat all over my body. After my shower routine, I quickly pull on one of Jeongguk’s black hoodies and a pair of matching shorts, then make my way down to the infirmary. Normally I’d just take care of my injuries myself, but Namjoon knowing me as well as he does, he knows I’d probably just brush everything off and not give my wounds the treatment they need.

So down to the infirmary I go. Infirmaries have never been my favorite place to go to even if I’ve spent a good chunk of my life in them. They always make me feel uncomfortable, though I can never pinpoint the reason why. As such, I typically make it a point to go there as little as possible, and either treat myself with my own medical supplies in either my room or my workshop, or have someone treat me anywhere that’s not in the infirmary. But when it comes to Mina noona’s office I make an exception, mainly because her office isn’t quite an actual hospital (the actual infirmary building is a five minute walk from the mansion) but similar to my own workshop, only more comforting. At least, a normal person’s vision of normal.

Then there’s the fact that Mina noona isn’t like the other doctor’s I’ve often come across. She’s an actual angel in both appearance and personality. She’s a very amiable and loving person, and also humorous and smart. If I were to receive medical treatment from any doctor in the world it’d be her. Well, her and her younger brother, Soobin; an actual baby. The door to Mina’s office is open when I arrive there, letting me know that she has no patients at the moment.

“Noona.” I call out, shutting the door behind me.

Mina’s office is bigger than mine, enough to fit all of her important equipment, medicine and whatnot. On the wall opposite of the door are three hospital beds, a curtain dividing them all.

“Oh, Taehyungie, what can I do for you?” Mina asks from her desk.

Mina pushes her chair back from her desk and pulls off her glasses, setting them on top of some papers. She smiles as she stands up to greet me, pulling me into a quick hug and pecking my cheek.

“Hello to you too, noona. I’m here just for a checkup. Make sure everything is still in order after tonight, y’know?” I tell her.

“Ah, okay, okay. Go ahead and take a seat and take your hoodie off while I grab my equipment, okay?”

“Okay.”

She walks off to get her things, meanwhile I pull off my hoodie and take a seat at a random bed. Mina’s office is cold, it always is, and so only a second after I’ve taken off my hoodie my skin erupts into goosebumps. I softly kick my feet back and forth while waiting for Mina, staring at my interlocked hands in my lap. Boredom creeps onto me, and with it brings random thoughts such as:

_ Is water wet? _

_ Is cereal a soup? _

_ What ever happened to Zhu Zhu Pets? _

_ Where did Queen Elizabeth II get her immortal powers from? _

_ Is the Philosopher’s Stone real? Or the fountain of youth? _

_ What would happen if I just killed Sana right now? _

_ Halloween is coming up next month, what should I be? _

_ Jimin’s birthday is coming up, too, what should I get him? _

A stool gets pushed in front of me and Mina plops herself onto it, setting her supplies on a small table next to her.

“So, first off, anything hurt more than it should?” She asks me, putting on her stethoscopes.

“No.”

“Okay.”

She begins checking my vitals, noting them down on a notepad before redressing my injuries from a few nights ago.

“I’m assuming everything went well on your mission?” She says, making light conversation.

I shrug, focussing my gaze on one of the posters of the human skeleton on the wall.

“I suppose.” I mutter.

“Uh oh.”

I turn to look at Mina, raising an eyebrow.

“What do you mean ‘uh oh’?” I ask.

“I mean ‘uh oh’ as in uh oh you’ve got that ‘I want to kill someone right now but I can’t’ look on your face right now.”

“Oh.....I have a face like that?”

“Yeah, you do, and it’s showing right now. So, who is it that you want to murder and why and why can’t you kill them?”

“Her name is Sana-”

“Ooh, ‘her’? Didn’t think you’d ever have a thing against a girl.”

“I don’t discriminate between genders. Something like that could cause me immense trouble in the future. The only ones I try not to harm are kids.”

“Ah, yeah that makes sense. So, what about this Sarah girl?”

I snort lightly, chuckling a bit at the wrong name.

“We found her at the last sub-group we exterminated. She said she was being held hostage by some guys there along with some other things, but none of what she said seems to actually be the truth. Everything about her seems so fake, so......rehearsed. And the way she immediately took a liking to Jeongguk is.......it’s not  _ right _ .  _ She’s _ not right. I haven’t got any hard proof against her other than the fact that she’s lying about where she’s been living and those guys in her apartment which might be more than enough for me to get rid of her, but there are two big reasons why I can’t.” I explain.

“And they are?”

“Well one, she claims to have important information on a group that’s been hunting down my team and I for a long time now, one of the bigger groups that we came here to get protection from. If what she claims is true, then this could be our one chance to get rid of them; a chance we probably won’t get again. As much as I hate it and want her gone, I know it’d be stupid of me to just waste this opportunity. And two, since she  _ is _ lying about what happened - we haven’t got a clue on who she really is, at least not right now. If I kill her now without knowing anything, I could potentially be killing an important asset of some rival group and put a whole new target on all of our backs. I can’t be reckless like that.”  _ I can’t cause you guys anymore trouble than I already have when we asked for your protection. _

“Hmm, yeah, you’re right. This does seem to be a rather unfavorable predicament. So, what are you going to do, then? Have you told the others?”

“Yeah, I did. Except for Jeongguk. Sana was literally clinging to him since the moment I left them, so I haven’t had the chance. Joon and Yoongi are currently looking up information on Sana while the others watch her and Jeongguk. I’m supposed to tell everyone else in the mansion after I’m finished here.”

“Sounds good so far. I mean, there isn’t much we can do now, is there?”

“Well, I could totally torture her into telling me what I want to know, but I think it’d be best to just watch and wait for now. Besides, Joon probably wouldn’t let me do that without knowing just who she is first. The more of her personal life we know about her, the more leverage we can use against her.”

“So we just play the waiting game, then, huh? Alright, alright, I’ll play along. I’ll make sure to keep an eye on her when I see her and tell you if I notice anything weird.”

“Thank you.”

“Don’t worry about it! Someone’s threatening our safety, of course I’m going to help out where I can. And in the meantime, you take care of yourself, okay? Physically and mentally.”

“I’ll try.”

Mina gives me a remorseful look at that.

“You guys still haven’t talked, have you?” She asks.

I smile sadly at her question.

“No, we haven’t. Everytime we’re together all we do is either steal subtle glances at each other or talk about anything other than what’s going on between us. It’s so suffocating.” I pause, feeling a knot grow in my throat and keeping me from talking. “It keeps fucking with my head, the longer it goes on the harder it is to control my impulses. I don’t know how much longer I can go before I either sleep again or spike.”

“Sweetheart you really need to talk with him. This is killing the both of you.”

“You make it sound so easy. I want to talk to him, but I can’t-”

“You can’t or won’t?”

“ _ I _ can’t.” The emphasis on “I” causes Mina to stop talking, realizing that it’s not that I don’t  _ want _ to talk to Jeongguk, but that I, myself, quite literally can’t talk to him. “Besides, I don’t think now is a good time to talk about it, we should deal with Sana first. We’ve got an enemy among us now, and it’d be stupid to show any weakness and grant a perfect opportunity to attack us.”

Mina merely nods, placing one last bandage on my calf before standing up.

“Well, I’m all done here. Everything seems to be in shape still, which is good, nothing too bad either, just make sure you’re regularly changing your bandages. You can stop putting on the bandages for the smaller ones, they’re going to need the fresh air. Other than that, you don’t need to come back unless one of the deeper cuts starts looking funky.” She tells me as she cleans up.

“Okay, thank you.”

“No problem. Try to get some rest soon, alright?”

“I will. See you later, noona.”

“See ya!”

I pull my hoodie back on and hop off of the bed, heading out of the office. The sun has long since risen by now, golden rays of the early morning light flooding some of the halls in an almost unrealistic way. There was just something so strange about it, whether it be in the way it so softly shone through the windows and laid on the ground or the way that it illuminated every small speck that touched it’s warm glow I wouldn’t know.

I envied it.

It was so bright and warm. It was joyful and comforting. It was happiness and peace. It was everything I didn’t have, and I envied it. I envied it to the point where I could no longer bear the sunlight, and all I craved was to board up all of the windows and create an eternal night where I could forever bask in the dark.

But the darkness was even more suffocating than the light.

But I am a coward, and I’d rather hide in the dark of the night than have my being exposed in the light of the day.

I head to the kitchen first, figuring that there’s probably already two or three people awake and grabbing something to eat. Sure enough, I find JB, Jackson, and Bambam all in the kitchen, snacking on some bread I made a while ago.

“Morning, guys.” I say as I enter.

“Oh, good morning, Tae! Shouldn’t you be sleeping right now? I mean, you just got back from a mission, right?” Bambam asks.

“Mmm, yeah, but something came up. I won’t go into full detail right now, just know that we picked a girl up on the last drop and she’s not to be trusted at all. Watch what you say and do around her and let me know if she does anything suspicious as well. Also, look out for Jeongguk too. She’s seemed to take quite an interest in him, it could be possible he’s what she’s after. I’ll let you know when there’s something more concrete. Spread the word to the others, I’m going to check on Jeongguk.”

“Well shit, things literally couldn’t get any worse right now, could they?” Jackson mutters, stuffing his mouth full of bread right afterwards.

I chuckle at his actions. “Hopefully not, but let’s not keep our hopes up. I’ll see you guys later.”

I leave the kitchen after that, and head up to Jeongguk’s office. I knock twice on the door before opening it and looking in, frowning softly when I see it’s empty. I close the door after double checking no one’s in there and then jog down to the older’s room and stopping in front of his door. I raise my fist, ready to knock on the wood, but instead pausing right as my hand is about to make contact with the door. I lower my fist, shoving it into my hoodie pocket, and turn around - heading back to my room and going to sleep.


End file.
